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Broching the taboo subject of dressing with a vanilla date

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So about 3 months ago I broke up with a GF that i had been seeing for 7 months (i was not on fab during this time). We broke up because our sexual interests where too different. It took that whole 7 months to reach the conclusion that we weren't compatible...and even then I couldn't come round to broach the subject of me dressing with her.

Does anyone else find it difficult dating in the 'vanilla' world? Any advice for disclosing kinks etc earlier on in a relationship without coming across like a weirdo/perv?

Or is it just a case that I haven't found the right girl?!

Im at the point where im nervous of dating anyone with friendship links to anyone I know, incase that when i do share with them my interests, it doesent sit right with them and then they blab to someone who knows me

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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago

Stoke area

Why are you dating in vanilla land ? I would think that ladies on fab are less judgemental as a rule. I suggest you look for ladies here. You also would not worry so much about them saying something to people you know, as most on here are more discreet .

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I can understand your dilemma.

How much would it matter if friends knew? Do you think you could weather that, would they care?

Hypothetically if I was dating a guy I'd be happy to discuss things like this during the first few dates but I know that not everyone is like that.

How about casually mentioning cross dressing as in "I have a friend who cross dresses" sort of way", fairly early in the relationship?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few years ago i mentioned to my ex wife that i liked to wear knickers and nylons... she was initially ok with this and went along. After a couple of months she said she didnt like this so I stopped wearing to her knowledge.

Sadly our marriage didnt work out and she decided she wanted some other guy... when i asked her why she didnt want me she blamed my wearing. Her brother and son who were trying to help us stay together couldnt understand and so she told them why !!!

Anyway she left and i got to know a lady who i knew through twitter. She knew all about my fetishes and was more than accepting.

Moral of the story .... find yourself a kinky partner !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lawd knows I'm trying that, OP'S story somewhat similar to mine. I've been blocked for admitting.to kinks on here from one, others probably to attraction, ho hum... I think the women that also like this are outnumbered by the men, any man into panties etc that finds a partner is one lucky being!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You could always try telling her during lovemaking that you find it very sensuous rubbing against her slip or satin nightdress and if you ad lucky she might take the initiative and suggest you try it on. It worked for me

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By *apiomanMan
over a year ago

Shipley


"Why are you dating in vanilla land ? I would think that ladies on fab are less judgemental as a rule. I suggest you look for ladies here. You also would not worry so much about them saying something to people you know, as most on here are more discreet .

"

Even if Fab women are less judgmental, I don’t think men relying on getting a date here is that realistic considering the ratio of men to women.

I have been on Tinder dates and decided to be open about being poly early on just so it’s out of the way. They can either accept this or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why are you dating in vanilla land ? I would think that ladies on fab are less judgemental as a rule. I suggest you look for ladies here. You also would not worry so much about them saying something to people you know, as most on here are more discreet .

Even if Fab women are less judgmental, I don’t think men relying on getting a date here is that realistic considering the ratio of men to women.

I have been on Tinder dates and decided to be open about being poly early on just so it’s out of the way. They can either accept this or not. "

I was about to say the same thing about the ratio. I would also add online dating is not the right way to go about it really.

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