FabSwingers.com forum: Giving specific advice

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Does anyone else agree with this..... I don't object to people being given general advice, ie, 'your profile write up is minimal, tell people what you can offer them' or 'less cock pics/better quality pics which show you're best features' etc, however I have recently seen a some more specific tips. I can't remember other specific examples but one I have just seen is where someone told a guy a pic of him smoking a spliff will put people off so he's removed it. I would want to know if a guy who messaged us smokes dope and if its not in their write up and they don't tell us upon chatting then that's deception, and if someone felt the need to hide it from profile just to get chatting, I wonder if and when they'd feel they can declare it upon establishing a chat - if at all.

To anyone who recognises the thread I'm referring to - including the OP, sorry to pick on that particular thread, it's not personal, this is just the most recent example.

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By *hromosexualsCouple
over a year ago

Near Abercynon

"if its not in their write up and they don't tell us upon chatting then that's deception"

Only if you specifically ask.

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By *adetMan
over a year ago

South of Ipswich

I just saw that thread and kind of thought the same

But realistically how can you possibly expect to know anything about anybody is true on here

Short of asking them to complete a questionnaire

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By *chilles and RavenCouple
over a year ago

Guernsey

Yes i agree with the OP, i have seen that particular thread and thought the same. But then most people hide things in order to seem more favourable. The one that annoys me is starting not a smoker but stinks or smoke or is smoking when you meet in person.

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"The one that annoys me is starting not a smoker but stinks or smoke or is smoking when you meet in person. "

This is the one that really bugs me.

The smell of cigarette smoke is a huge turn off for me.

Have met people in clubs and got on well but the smoking is the deal breaker. When you check out the profile they claim to be a non smoker

Don't think that there is anything you can do about it though...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does anyone else agree with this..... I don't object to people being given general advice, ie, 'your profile write up is minimal, tell people what you can offer them' or 'less cock pics/better quality pics which show you're best features' etc, however I have recently seen a some more specific tips. I can't remember other specific examples but one I have just seen is where someone told a guy a pic of him smoking a spliff will put people off so he's removed it. I would want to know if a guy who messaged us smokes dope and if its not in their write up and they don't tell us upon chatting then that's deception, and if someone felt the need to hide it from profile just to get chatting, I wonder if and when they'd feel they can declare it upon establishing a chat - if at all.

To anyone who recognises the thread I'm referring to - including the OP, sorry to pick on that particular thread, it's not personal, this is just the most recent example. "

half the planet smoke dope

went into the supermarket and some guy stunk of the stuff

where I live most of the guys smoke it

you accept people for who they are

if you do not like a dope head then dont have sex with them simples

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just saw that thread and kind of thought the same

But realistically how can you possibly expect to know anything about anybody is true on here

Short of asking them to complete a questionnaire

well now

I certainly did not come here to lie thanks for that and putting us all in the same bracket here is not on ...are you claiming that everyone on here is lying? admin

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By *igJandTheBlondeCouple
over a year ago

Kings Hill

Interesting point OP, we’ve removed all traces of “specifics” from our profile a while back; they were mostly ignored or if, on occasion, someone messaged us about a specific point it was mostly them thinking it would be a short cut to meeting us; since we went “bland” our message count has plummeted but the quality has rocketed!

Still get the occasional dross, keeps the block button from getting rusty!

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By *artyanna16TV/TS
over a year ago

seacroft

I dont know if id be telling anyone , about my specific habits unless the conversation came up about chemicals , or alcohol. Im a smoker, trying to give up, but have lapses. But i wouldnt turn down someone who smokes, i wouldnt necessarilly be keen to meet someone who smokes pot, just as i wouldnt really be into meeting someone who was d*unk! I consider someone stating they are married and straight yet cant accomodate but want to visit me as more of a deception, than someone who wishes their personal use of chemicals on a strictly need to know basis! Incidentally , advising someone not to advertise their habit is sensible advice , from a legal and professional standpoint , but someone who is that blase , i would have thought would be showing a rather transparent side to themselves in any case. Dunno, ive tried to offer positive feeback on profiles before , we all try to offer a glimpse of ourselves without showing we have two heads tentacles for fingers and behave like tony harrison off the “boosh”.

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By *adetMan
over a year ago

South of Ipswich

"Interesting point OP, we’ve removed all traces of “specifics” from our profile a while back; they were mostly ignored or if, on occasion, someone messaged us about a specific point it was mostly them thinking it would be a short cut to meeting us; since we went “bland” our message count has plummeted but the quality has rocketed!

Still get the occasional dross, keeps the block button from getting rusty! "

This sounds like a very good idea

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

"The one that annoys me is starting not a smoker but stinks or smoke or is smoking when you meet in person.

This is the one that really bugs me.

The smell of cigarette smoke is a huge turn off for me.

Have met people in clubs and got on well but the smoking is the deal breaker. When you check out the profile they claim to be a non smoker

Don't think that there is anything you can do about it though..."

I've had to say no for the exact reason. Fags are a passion killer.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The married and wife not knowing about fab is a big thing and not something you would necessarily know unless told. We have asked men why they can't accom and you sometimes get an answer like 'I live with flat mates' or 'I have adult children who come and go as they please' (that one is a reasonable expectation for our age range) so we are pretty rubbish at 'smelling a rat'. A smoker - legal or otherwise is easier to spot for obvious reasons.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" if you do not like a dope head then dont have sex with them simples "

If we met a smoker we should be able to smell it. My post was not about smoking or other specific habits/circumstances, it was about experienced fabbers giving very specific advice, whatever that advice may be, which helps advice seekers to mislead or deceive potential fab mates.

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