FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swinging Support and Advice

Starting to lose faith

Jump to newest
 

By *antheman466 OP   Man
over a year ago

sheffield

Hi all, still new to this, but finding my wall of yellow unread sent messages pretty disheartening, so ladies what catches your eye? And guys what do you post to get them read?

tia,

Dan

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi all, still new to this, but finding my wall of yellow unread sent messages pretty disheartening, so ladies what catches your eye? And guys what do you post to get them read?

tia,

Dan"

Delete your sent messages, you'll not see them then.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An interesting message and profile

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If your easily upset you are going to get chewed up and spat out no one swallows sorry as I was saying be confident and how are you starting your messages

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff


"Hi all, still new to this, but finding my wall of yellow unread sent messages pretty disheartening, so ladies what catches your eye? And guys what do you post to get them read?

tia,

Dan"

It's been a week Dan, that's all.

Females get thousands of messages a day, you could write the best message ever and it could be completely wasted.

What exactly are you loosing faith over? There's no promises when signing up to the site

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *antheman466 OP   Man
over a year ago

sheffield

To be clear in not whinging here, im seeking advice from those with more experience

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *udewhennudeMan
over a year ago

newport


"Hi all, still new to this, but finding my wall of yellow unread sent messages pretty disheartening, so ladies what catches your eye? And guys what do you post to get them read?

tia,

Dan

Delete your sent messages, you'll not see them then."

Don’t even look in sent message box, if you get a reply it’s a bonus.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London

Write a profile that says a bit about your character.

Saying that you're polite and hygienic is not likely to grab women's interest.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always look at someone's profile and see how much effort they put in to it. If little effort has been used I tend to become disinterested as they are not really that serious.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)


"Hi all, still new to this, but finding my wall of yellow unread sent messages pretty disheartening, so ladies what catches your eye? And guys what do you post to get them read?

tia,

Dan

Delete your sent messages, you'll not see them then."

This is a good start.

It's all about expectations and what yours are. Well, whatever they were, just leave them behind.

It takes single guys on average about 5/6 months to get their first meet (I took 7). Frankly cold messaging others is about the worst way of making contact with others!

Do some research, look at single guys who are getting it right and see what you can adapt to yourself.

It's a big learning curve around here and it isn't for everyone, effort is the most important thing (I don't mean messaging everyone in a 50 mile radius either). It's about finding what works for you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull


"Hi all, still new to this, but finding my wall of yellow unread sent messages pretty disheartening, so ladies what catches your eye? And guys what do you post to get them read?

tia,

Dan"

What were your expectations when you joined a week ago ?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Write a profile that says a bit about your character.

Saying that you're polite and hygienic is not likely to grab women's interest."

Yes, don't describe yourself like a puppy for sale.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Loose your cock and eating pussy and put more effort into your profile

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *udewhennudeMan
over a year ago

newport

Concentrate on meeting a woman or couple first just for a social.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few Fab tips:

1) Don’t look at your sent emails.

2) If you are going to send emails - make it personal and specific. Show you have read their profile, make yourself interesting and be sensible.

3) Use the forums. Post comments, interact with people, be yourself. A lot of Fabbers use the forums as a filtering system so don’t be a dick and take your time to establish yourself.

4) Keep your profile current - I know you have only been here a week, but update your status (with something other than how horny you are and how much you need sex), post good pics.

5) Get some verifications. The easiest way is to go to a local social and be nice.

Give it time - you are being judged against many thousand of other single guy profiles, but you’ll get there.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never look at sent messages. In fact delete them after you sent them

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Loose your cock and eating pussy and put more effort into your profile "

Oh and this

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *antheman466 OP   Man
over a year ago

sheffield

[Removed by poster at 13/11/19 14:49:39]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *antheman466 OP   Man
over a year ago

sheffield


"I always look at someone's profile and see how much effort they put in to it. If little effort has been used I tend to become disinterested as they are not really that serious. "

Thanks, that's actually really helpful!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *antheman466 OP   Man
over a year ago

sheffield


"Loose your cock and eating pussy and put more effort into your profile

Oh and this "

Noted, thanks for the advice!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *wholeLotOfRosieWoman
over a year ago

Pontypridd

The way I decide whether to respond to a guys message is :

Has he read my profile?

Does he have an interesting profile that suggests we have things in common?

Do I like his pics?

That’s actually not much to consider- do you have a decent profile and have you had the courtesy to read mine basically.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Unfortunately even if you have a great profile and message, a lot of it will still just be down to pure luck of the draw.

We're talking about people who can get hundreds of messages a day. On any particular day they may not be looking for somebody or may already have found one. In those circumstances all you can do is make your messages and profile as good as you can and keep trying.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley


"If your easily upset you are going to get chewed up and spat out no one swallows sorry as I was saying be confident and how are you starting your messages "

I swallow

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *achelnMarkCouple
over a year ago

Mid Wiltshire


"Loose your cock and eating pussy and put more effort into your profile "

This. Read that, though "typical blunt and rude" and comes across as typical single guy arrogance with delusions of being a sexpert (that type are usually the exact opposite). Can't accom = married and playing away. Moaning after a week tends to underline this attitude of expectation

If we got mail from you, we would, click profile, read, block, deleted email without reading.

Better profile would make a huge difference. Do it with respect and consider those you seek, you do not join and have a right to wave a fat cock around and eat pussy . Photos aren't bad but profile text and approach is your death knell.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lose the whinging status, that would put me off straight away.

Change your age range, would you really shag a 99year old?

Write a polite friendly message after having read their profile.

Don’t look at the sent box

Add some more arty interesting pics.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of my limited experience...

I think commenting in the forums help and you may find yourself being sent messages. I’ve certainly found this is the case.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *antheman466 OP   Man
over a year ago

sheffield

Thanks all for the input, making changes as we speak

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do not expect sex or a meet or even a quarter of your messages to be repied to. just chill and chat and don't get worked up about the rejection that all men on here have to take on the chin. 99 percent of us have a sent items full of yellow messages. You will eventually get bored of it and just abandon the dream of lots of sex with multiple hot women every weekend.. And when you do and have accepted it you'll find you will start to be noticed and the odd liason will occur. Honestly regular dating apps are far less hard work to get laid lol.. Just my experience!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do not expect sex or a meet or even a quarter of your messages to be repied to. just chill and chat and don't get worked up about the rejection that all men on here have to take on the chin. 99 percent of us have a sent items full of yellow messages. You will eventually get bored of it and just abandon the dream of lots of sex with multiple hot women every weekend.. And when you do and have accepted it you'll find you will start to be noticed and the odd liason will occur. Honestly regular dating apps are far less hard work to get laid lol.. Just my experience!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

All this ^^^^^

Plus, you don't have to take the advice you're given, it's not compulsory.

Also, different people frequently offer differing advice.

You can't please everyone, don't try to or your profile will be a mix max of everyone's advice and won't have a word of what you're actually all about.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d chat with you if you weren’t so far away lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *arkndirtyMan
over a year ago

sale

Keep your expectations very low. I don't monitor sent messages. Be relaxed, friendly and confident - people respond to that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *achelnMarkCouple
over a year ago

Mid Wiltshire


"All this ^^^^^

Plus, you don't have to take the advice you're given, it's not compulsory.

Also, different people frequently offer differing advice.

You can't please everyone, don't try to or your profile will be a mix max of everyone's advice and won't have a word of what you're actually all about."

^^^ This

Be honest to yourself, do not fake it just to get response else you'll be more dissapointed in the flesh than you are on a keyboard.

But just do a better job than you had! Unless that is the real you in which case audience is limited

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi all, still new to this, but finding my wall of yellow unread sent messages pretty disheartening, so ladies what catches your eye? And guys what do you post to get them read?

tia,

Dan"
i tell them ive got fairy cakes and a puppy my inbox is jammed

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *eeman1000Man
over a year ago

durham

Mine says fill in later and I still get msgs, just wait it out op

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top