FabSwingers.com forum: What do people look for in first message?

By *ikerdude2017 OP Man
over a year ago

Rotherham

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Something original. A nice face pic or body shot

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Marriage proposal

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots

Something that shows they have bothered to read our profile.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *man91Man
over a year ago

Manchester

"Marriage proposal

The bigger question is would you except it?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Marriage proposal

The bigger question is would you except it?"

Depends who is asking

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Something that shows they have bothered to read our profile."

This. If you can do this you're better off than 80-90%.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *onkeyandBonesCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

A sentence or two would be nice

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks"

Couple of cock pics and a "hi" message.

Guaranteed to snap the knicker 'lastic

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Boob pics

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks

Couple of cock pics and a "hi" message.

Guaranteed to snap the knicker 'lastic"

As they're twisted into the chastity belt?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks

Couple of cock pics and a "hi" message.

Guaranteed to snap the knicker 'lastic

As they're twisted into the chastity belt? "

Tourniquet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

The majority would want you to have read their profile and be what they're looking for. A bit of humour and intelligence is always nice to read but a genuine well thought out message stands a good chance of getting a reply.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

relate to something they have written in their profile and something about yourself...more than just a few words, a couple of sentences

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Generally if there isn't one on profile a face pic. As harsh as it may sound it's a make it or break it and saves time and effort for both parties.

Other than that I wouldn't expect more than a hi or hello considering my profile

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *evonshireboyMan
over a year ago

North Devon

"The majority would want you to have read their profile and be what they're looking for. A bit of humour and intelligence is always nice to read but a genuine well thought out message stands a good chance of getting a reply."

Would be good if more people had a profile then! The number of profiles with just a stock silhouette Avi and a description that says "looking for fun" is unreal

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *m389Man
over a year ago

Magherafelt

I usually want a face pic and a body pic, if it's not on their profile already.

A sentence or two on where they want me to take them on a social helps. A bot about themselves and what they enjoy etc...

Seriously though, the amount of women that put no effort whatsoever... Just one lines like:

"hey wanna ride me xoxo"

"been dying for some oriental cock hun"

"gimme yer porksword sweetiepie"

Unbelievable hard to get a decent meet here. The women need to cop on!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks"
respect and manners, personality and a sensible analogy based on target profile with a smiling face pic, simples

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As long as it’s cohesive and articulate we don’t care, a short hello is fine

Let’s face it if some hotties that fit our criteria message us we don’t care what it says as long as it’s in English, polite and makes sense! Not much to ask for but you’d be surprised xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A good first message should demonstrate some personality and originality, make it clear that they've read our profile and show that they are genuinely looking for the same things as us!

There's nothing worse than someone telling you what they think you want to hear in order to try and get a meet because you can see right through it after a glance at their profile and a couple of messages.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Read profiles before send msg

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I look for someone who has clearly read my profile and understands it!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Read profiles before send msg "

This

So so many times you instantly know they just looked at the photos with their crude messages.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Polite worded well thought out message not do u want to fuck my brains out tonight

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

Theres no magic formula..

Its not gender specific the inability to read a profile or send a message of more than 'hi'

My other observation

I doubt any words you'd type would change a persons mind if they didn't find you attractive.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks"

Readable and showing signs of intelligence, respect to woman.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ettyboop61Woman
over a year ago

St Neots

As long as they have read my profile and written more than HI! Anything less just gets deleted can't be asked and shows they are boring!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ack Flash400Man
over a year ago

The Bat Cave

" relate to something they have written in their profile and something about yourself...more than just a few words, a couple of sentences "

Seen a few profiles which say 'fill in later' & one which just had ......

Do I need to learn Morse Code to answer?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks"

There no magic enchantment, you just have to sound as normal down to earth and genuine as you can and try and be loud then all the rest and try and drown out all the losers and desperate men that think cock pics and fancy a fuck messages are all you need to slip a women panties off.

addendum: Some women may like cock pics some do not

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *969BewitchedWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

A face pic is needed for me. Without one I just delete without reply. Anyone with a meet now/wanna fuck type message gets blocked.

If there is a face pic a simple "would you like to talk" message is fine. Then it's a simple yes I would or a sorry not for me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks"

Big dicks!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hewifeandiCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

We had a fella today ask if I'd given the wife a good seeing too lol made me giggle 23 years together and no never touched her our kids were made from Kellogg's coco pops boxes but look very real

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would be nice if they checked the looking for box and saw if they fulfilled the criteria.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A good first message should demonstrate some personality and originality, make it clear that they've read our profile and show that they are genuinely looking for the same things as us!

This ^^^

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Passion, reliability, generosity and vulnerability

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly, anything.

I think understandably women and cpls here are flooded with uninspiring single Ms & dumb chat but it takes two to tango and people will miss out if they don't attempt to strike up an honest conversation. It's easy enough to block & ignore those who won't make the effort but I truly appreciate anyone who took the time to click the message button

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm slightly different in as much as I reply to most of my messages and respect the fact that not everyone is good at the written word, though if you want a reply without the word sorry in then some semblance of personality and originality is best

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly different in as much as I reply to most of my messages and respect the fact that not everyone is good at the written word, though if you want a reply without the word sorry in then some semblance of personality and originality is best "
I'm absolutely crap at the written word, I'm nervous, uninspiring, devoid of human emotions, I evoke scepticism and I'm very tanned, I'm not worthy of a reply don't do it you know you'll regret it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks"

And deffo gud gramma

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just a polite nice message of a couple of lines with a face picture attached would be fantastic

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

Just be yourself.

If you fake it in a first message it's just wasting peoples time.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Something that shows they have bothered to read our profile."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ap d agde coupleCouple
over a year ago

Broadstairs

Not crude ,also allows to look at there profile to see if they are for real

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iner69erMan
over a year ago

inverness

I've put all things that people have mentioned here in messages to girls. Doesnt work.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I look for a connection, a spark, a glint in their eye, a height that meets my very specific specifications and most importantly hair on her head

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ikerdude2017 OP Man
over a year ago

Rotherham

Thanks for all the tips will keep trying

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks"

Most people look at your profile before opening your email. If your profile doesn't grab them your email gets deleted or left unopened.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks

Most people look at your profile before opening your email. If your profile doesn't grab them your email gets deleted or left unopened. "

Agree

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Marriage proposal

The bigger question is would you except it?"

"Accept" you mean.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

The profile. No point talking on if a person is so glaringly not for you from the profile.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi

Any tips would be grateful.

Thanks

Most people look at your profile before opening your email. If your profile doesn't grab them your email gets deleted or left unopened. "

Agree this ^^

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *peak and SpellCouple
over a year ago

Greenwich, SE LONDON

... and if you are sending a face pic... Please smile. The number of pics we receive where the sender either looks like a mass murderer or heard the worst news of his life before photographing himself.

Lighten up people. A smile makes everyone seem more approachable.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

That it's from a genuine female and it wasn't sent to me by mistake

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aughty Lovers 69Man
over a year ago

Wallasey

Something that is genuine and that is not a two word conversation. So many people instigate but then send one or two words messages. I like a good flowing genuine conversation.

That just might be me tho

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone prepared to post an example first message?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rx1Couple
over a year ago

North Devon-ish

A good old fashioned

"Hey How R u"

Makes it easier to block, Makes life so much easier, without reading their profile

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *evadomCouple
over a year ago

birmingham

[Removed by poster at 27/07/19 13:35:47]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyone prepared to post an example first message?

Small introduction, in message show you have read their profile and match with their interest and draft message such a way so they will have some smile or laugh.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Anyone prepared to post an example first message?

If you were messaging me you could say something like " Hello. I see from reading your verifications you have been to both Quest and Pandoras. Which do you prefer ?"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Something that says you pay attention to details and shows you're respectful.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If talking to a couple address both of them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ent and bratCouple
over a year ago

here there everywhere

Adressing both of a couple and somthing that shows they have read the profile. Love the wife getting compliments

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Read the profile and try pick something of interest from it to start a conversation

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ornysquirtingcoupleCouple
over a year ago

somerset

Wife chooses all meets. If you have a sense of humor and make a effort with your message you will stand out from the croud. Funny is more effective than dirty. And she does not even look at the cock pics until she is arranges a meet

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex

A face pic ..... def a face pic

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A face pic ..... def a face pic

"
Do you also like observations on your decor at home?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We like it when someone has actually read our profile and that we have something in common and the message reflects that.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex

"A face pic ..... def a face pic

Do you also like observations on your decor at home?

That ones lost on me I’m afraid lol ? ? Not sure what you mean ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think there's too much pressure to write the 'perfect' first message. If you're messaging someone you like the look of but they don't have much written in their profile it can be hard to know what to put - this is why I tend to message people who have written something in their profiles that I can respond to. But if someone sends me a message that's nice, suggests they've looked at my profile and gives me something to respond to then that's a decent start.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A face pic ..... def a face pic

Do you also like observations on your decor at home?

That ones lost on me I’m afraid lol ? ? Not sure what you mean ? "
background of pics also selling home thread

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *arnsley guy100Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

I just put... Wanna fuck in next hour or so??... Either works or it doesn't... But genrally does

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex

"A face pic ..... def a face pic

Do you also like observations on your decor at home?

That ones lost on me I’m afraid lol ? ? Not sure what you mean ? background of pics also selling home thread

Aha yes I get ya

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *D04Couple
over a year ago

Leigh

"I just put... Wanna fuck in next hour or so??... Either works or it doesn't... But genrally does"

Couldn't think or a more off putting message to receive

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ickDastardlyMan
over a year ago

North East

my advice would be this.

Keep it fairly short, don't over do it. Ask questions in relation to their/her/his profile.

Introduce yourself without copying your words in own profile.

Also include a face pic. Always include a face pic *golden rule*

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't believe peoplw spend their time look through profiles to send them a message. Rather gambol though 50 cactus's naked

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *arnsley guy100Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"I just put... Wanna fuck in next hour or so??... Either works or it doesn't... But genrally does

Couldn't think or a more off putting message to receive"
that's your choice.. Some don't look into it to much.. and just wanna fuck and is just usually being at the right place at right time.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Something that shows they have bothered to read our profile.

This. If you can do this you're better off than 80-90%."

I don’t like this comment. I read all before I message. If it full of negatives I don’t bother. If there are no public photos I don’t bother, if it list the details of say a famous actor I don’t bother.then if I find one I like I write a pointed message based on the profile only to see it deleted unread.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jesus Christ it’s easy. Don’t be creepy, don’t be sleazy. Talk to them as a person and not a commodity. Engage them in a conversation that’s not about sex to start with. If they are interested the conversation will move on. The lads that do well on here also do well in the real world. If that’s not you, you will not fair any better here.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex

I tell you what is an instant turn off for me in a first message

One of those HUGE copy and paste things about what they are going to do to me

Normally start with ‘ Hey Scarlett , how would you like this scenario ?’

A simple ‘hey , if you like me let’s message’ with a couple pics including a face one is perfect

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I tell you what is an instant turn off for me in a first message

One of those HUGE copy and paste things about what they are going to do to me

Normally start with ‘ Hey Scarlett , how would you like this scenario ?’

A simple ‘hey , if you like me let’s message’ with a couple pics including a face one is perfect

"
Hey _carlettx you look gorgeous let's go to aldis for coffee I've got my rocks on profile......... That sort of thing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Demonstrate that you've read the profile of the person you're messaging.

Ive lost count of the times guys have sent messages and clearly not fitting what I look for.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Demonstrate that you've read the profile of the person you're messaging.

Ive lost count of the times guys have sent messages and clearly not fitting what I look for."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread