FabSwingers.com forum: Weight

By *unformeandyou84 OP Woman
over a year ago

westmeath

So, I'm here a short while now, chatting to a few people, love the forums.... But, I'm v slow to make the leap towards meeting... Because I'm overweight... I have started trying to sort that out but obviously it takes time... And I don't want to wait to have fun lol... But then I see myself in a mirror and I am disgusted, I think "you can't meet anyone when you're that fat".

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really wouldn’t worry about it.

Everyone has different tastes and I am sure you will get more confident the more you explore yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel like that a lot of the time. I'm off back to WW tonight. Enough is enough!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel the same : ( one thing ive learnt is that everyone is sexy on here in their own way. I love seeing peoples confidence and wish i had some. Ur beautiful and ur body is great

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By *udistnorthantsMan
over a year ago

Desborough

"So, I'm here a short while now, chatting to a few people, love the forums.... But, I'm v slow to make the leap towards meeting... Because I'm overweight... I have started trying to sort that out but obviously it takes time... And I don't want to wait to have fun lol... But then I see myself in a mirror and I am disgusted, I think "you can't meet anyone when you're that fat".

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

Try not to overthink things and look forward to getting some meets... life is too short to worry too much what you look like...if they like your new pics they'll want you in person

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By *uck.Squeeze.Bang.BlowCouple
over a year ago

nottingham

Beauty isnt about size, I (mr) love a smiley face, everything else always looks amazing if a lady smiles xx

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By *riage12Man
over a year ago

Liverpool

Just chat to people a bit more before a meet, perhaps even have a social meet beforehand to make sure that there’s a genuine connection. I personally enjoy the eye contact a hell of a lot more during sex than how big / small someone is.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP, i know your pain.

last time i was on here, with my ex, even though we did actually get a fair amount of meets, every time someone let us down i felt it was my fault for being the size i was.

also felt very self concsious when getting naked in the company of others.

since then, i have a new partner and have lost around 5 stone, and still going.

i now have the other problem of loads of saggy skin lol. suppose you cant win.

all you can do is accept yourself as best you can and realise there ARE those that will find you sexually attractive.

yes, there are those that wont, but you need not concern yourself with those.

good luck and happy playing

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By *unformeandyou84 OP Woman
over a year ago

westmeath

Thank you all... I've added more pics and when I get a chance I'll add some better ones

I appreciate you all taking the time to reply.

Yes I'm full of personality, and I'm comfortable in my skin to a point but.. the thought of meeting someone and them not wanting to... It's stopping me right now

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By *riage12Man
over a year ago

Liverpool

"Thank you all... I've added more pics and when I get a chance I'll add some better ones

I appreciate you all taking the time to reply.

Yes I'm full of personality, and I'm comfortable in my skin to a point but.. the thought of meeting someone and them not wanting to... It's stopping me right now "

Sounds like you need to have a social meet before moving to the bedroom if you aren’t 100%. Just never let anyone knock your confidence, you’re lucky (sort of) in that this site is saturated with men so there is probably going to be a hell of a lot of them that will find you attractive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I first joined on our couple's account over a year ago..I only put photos on of my boobs. I refused to show off anything more. As time has gone on my confidence has grown but never thought I'd have enough confidence to be naked in front of anyone else apart from my hubby...

Well how wrong was I!

I now have full body pics and if people don't like what they see then it's fine... Other people will love what they see

There's no rush.. you will know when your ready

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By *unformeandyou84 OP Woman
over a year ago

westmeath

Yes maybe... I'm trying to build myself up, a sexless marriage has my confidence on the floor

But I'll get over this and hopefully have some success in the wonderful world of Fab

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By *JohnMan
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

You look fantastic in that profile pic. I know there's not a lot on show there, but what I see looks good.

There are people who will only meet with slim fit people. There are others who prefer larger women. There are some who don't mind what you look like as long as your personality meshes with theirs.

There will be people out there for you. You just have to get out there and find them, or let them find you.

I know how hard it is to get over the barrier of confidence. It's worth making the effort, trust me.

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Curvy women are very popular on here. This is a very body-positive community.

I would be very surprised if you didn't leave us speechless with desire when we see your photos.

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By *weet Treat 69Couple
over a year ago

North Wales area

Yeah I feel like this all the time hun. I'm constantly over thinking what I look like. That nobody will wanna meet me. Plus after having 3kids there's stretch marks so I'm extremely body conscious unattractive. And if some does pay me a compliment I think there just saying that cuz they wanna get into my pants.

Be positive lovely xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Looking great!

Don't be so bad on yourself and don't let others bring you down.

There's nothing more sexy than a woman that's confident in her own body and she doesn't have to follow the crowd be yourself.

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By *unformeandyou84 OP Woman
over a year ago

westmeath

Aww you guys

Thanks so much for the positive messages!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No ones perfect. Have faith in yourself op, you will get your confidence and you will have fun!

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By *ollydoesWoman
over a year ago

Shangri-La

"Just chat to people a bit more before a meet, perhaps even have a social meet beforehand to make sure that there’s a genuine connection. I personally enjoy the eye contact a hell of a lot more during sex than how big / small someone is."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op I think fabs will sort out your lack of confidence I was very much the same

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You look fabulous in your pics, organise a few socials for yourself and make sure its the right person for u to take to the bedroom, you wont regret it and have a ball...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nobody is perfect, those who state that they are are lying. I think I’m currently overweight for my height, there’s still days I’m disgusted with how I look but I’m me.

OP you’ll get your confidence back

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Overweight, yes I feel that.

That I shouldn't be on here, disgusted or unhappy with my body no.

If you lose weight and it makes you feel better about your self that's cool. But I don't think that is really addressing the core issuses holding you back. I have no doubt your perception of yourself is way more negative than the reality. So don't hold back any longer, come join us all as you and you'll be very welcome. You'll find yourself having just as much fun and being desired as much as anyone else. Life really is too short not to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I've learnt one thing during my time on fab it's that most men love a big girl! When I started on here, my confidence was at an all time low and I was so ashamed of my size and had convinced myself 'im an easy lay and thats why they want me' but as time went on I've learnt that men do genuinely like me and love my curves and size. Yes id rather be thinner and yes I'm constantly on a diet but my god I have so much confidence now and that's thanks to the lovely guys on here. I insist on at least one social and do quite a bit of chatting first -they get to know "me" as a person not just the big girl with too many curves and for that, they respect me all the more. But I do make it clear from the start that I am a big girl so there is no pretence on my part. Remember, you have something these guys want-make them work for it because believe me, they love a challenge. good luck hun xxx

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By *ottyNStripes30Couple
over a year ago

Oakham

I used to feel this way, my ex didn't help my confidence by saying stuff like.. get yourself undressed and stand in front of the mirror and tell me what I should find attractive.

I hated myself, I got rid of him after 11 years stupid me for waiting so long.

I started to build my own confidence by buying pretty clothes and making my hair pretty and finding myself again.

I went on to find my now husband and he loved every bit of my fat body, made me feel soo sexy, since then i have been slim,fat, slim fat and his behaviour towards me has been no different either way.

My advice is to play act and fix yourself up nice, pretend sexy,until it becomes you

theres loads of chaps love a bit of wobble

and ladies

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By *ndrew CareyMan
over a year ago

Peterborough, Cambridgeshire & Lincolnshire

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

Do not feel that way at all. There are people that will appreciate you the way you are today.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your certainly not fat, curvy yes. I wouldn’t say no anyway lol

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By *lwayshorny79Woman
over a year ago

Leicester

I feel exactly the same. Especially when they obviously have a great figure. But I have found it doesnt matter to alot of men on here and it is a great confidence boost.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Beauty is not defined by size lovely!

Your weight isn't the problem, it's your confidence levels. Don't let that hold you back and you'll soon start to build in confidence!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good on you lovely! Great pics xx

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By *eastAndTheHarlotCouple
over a year ago

Hartlepool

Some of us prefer snuggly.

I'm stick thin but attracted to people with a little extra, curvy girls and dad bods!

Guess it's just a comfier ride

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP I feel exactly like that when I put weight on. I absolutely hate it and think it doesn't suit me. It stopped me meeting for a year. Then I decided to lose the weight but my head hasn't quite caught up. Now it's been 2 years since I last met. It's been a long slow process but I'm getting there. Good luck with it all x

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By *hedevilwearspradaWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere nearby

I’m fat. Like big and fat fat. And I hated my body, when I first joined Fab I thought I had made a terrible mistake, and that no one would want to meet me.

But I was wrong! I have met some amazing people, who have really given me confidence, sexual and otherwise. I never ever used to get naked on a meet, because I was so repulsed by my body that I couldn’t believe any one else wouldn’t be. A turning point was on a meet with a guy who knew about my hang ups, and still managed to get me naked. I was so worried about what he was thinking, but he was amazing. He stroked my tummy (my most hated bit), and although I was terrified, it felt really good. He made me look him in the eyes as he caressed me and showed me that he wasn’t put off in the slightest. It was a revelation!

Since then I’ve had similar meets with people who have made me look at myself in a new light, and shown me that I can be big, and soft, and still have amazing sex and the ability to turn someone on.

Oh I have days where I hate myself, but I’m learning to love myself, and my body.

Just go for it - and if you are ever up this way, hit me up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sexiness isn't defined by size I would by preference go for curves and I love belly boobs and thighs but that said I find a slim lady sexy too I love eyes and personality most

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

When I first came on here I did about 20 social meets before picking the right person for me. Don't rush into anything chat, do some socials meets and pick the person that is right for you. The one you feel comfortable with and that makes you feel desired.

In fairness the majority of the people here are lovely but if you encounter any negativity block and move on its them not you.

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By * peas in a podCouple
over a year ago

Youghal

I'm a big girl and don't classify myself as overweight. I'm fat. I have squishy bits and wobbly bits and quite honestly, I don't give a f#@k lol

When I joined Fab years ago, I was just out of a bad marriage and my confidence was rock bottom but after joining here and meeting people and doing clubs I've realised there's nothing wrong with me.

I am who I am. Take me or leave me.

Embrace your curves and don't be afraid to show them off.

A weighing scales doesn't define who you are or how beautiful you are.

I have the most amazing partner who loves my body and who rubs my squishy belly and he loves me for me not my weight.

Don't worry about what other people think. You're beautiful and be proud of who you are.

If others don't like it, shake your fine ass and walk away from their negativity.

Mrs. xxxx

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By *laymateteeMan
over a year ago

bristol

I wrote a post yesterday about appreciating BBWs/Curvy women and I adore full figured ladies. I know that you're not feeling confident but your pics look amazing and I think you're sexy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel the same hun. Im a big girl. But i also have a big personality that loves having fun x laughter in my life. Always someone worse off. I never go short of meets...

Enjoy yourself. Lifes for living babe. Xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel the same but some men like bbw

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By *laymateteeMan
over a year ago

bristol

"I feel the same but some men like bbw"

Yes we do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m a big fan of curvy/bbw X

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By *ommyxyzMan
over a year ago

Harlow

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

Hay for a sex site people on here, a lot of them anyway are far more into personality than body shape and having said that a lot of guys on here like bigger women anyway. And some just don’t care their just desperate for a meet. You’ll be fine when your ready, focus on all the bits you like about you and work on the others if you want. Have fun.

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By *im tim timMan
over a year ago

yes some men like ladies with a nice figure like you hun..you just need some courage and meet a guy and see how it goes..you can get back to me for a chat if you want to ..ok..

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By *ampshirehotwifeWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

Beauty and sexiness is not about size. It's an attitude!

Ask any woman...or man if they love their body. Guaranteed half of them hate the way they look.

Life is for living. It's far too short. Grab the bull by the horns before it gets too late!

Good luck op xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you look great in the public pics, nice set of boobies... be confident.

This site in the majority is a positive place...enjoy it for all it offers

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By *unformeandyou84 OP Woman
over a year ago

westmeath

I'm overwhelmed by all the responses, both here and privately... Already feeling more confident

Ye are a great bunch

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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

"Yes maybe... I'm trying to build myself up, a sexless marriage has my confidence on the floor

But I'll get over this and hopefully have some success in the wonderful world of Fab

the best way to get over a sex less marriage is to get under someone in the same position as yourself ,

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By *om and LisaCouple
over a year ago

gateshead

Here's a slightly different take on it.

When we've kept a bad diet and missed the gym, we don't feel that we can really enjoy ourselves at a club, or have the confidence we should have with a meet.

Both myself and Lisa fluctuate in weight.

When we have a holiday booked, we really go for it with our diets and get in the gym every day.

But most of the time, life gets in the way and we don't get a lot of time together, so end up watching TV and getting a takeaway on a weekend.

What we notice though, is that it only takes a few days of dieting/training to really boost our confidence and make us feel a lot better about ourselves.

Just recently we lost some weight and after a holiday we both had nice tans and we felt amazing.

That led to us both wanting to meet and go out a lot more.

The last week though, things have gotten in the way and we've fallen off the waggon.

But we know that it'll only take a few days to make us feel great again.

What I'm trying to say is that your goal shouldn't be too become stick thin, or get a 6 pack, but instead, set a short goal and you'll feel great.

If you want to keep going after that, then that's good too. But you'll know then that that boost in confidence is achievable in the short term and not a long slog that stops you from having fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 07/06/19 09:55:16]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is a very body-positive community.

I have to agree. This site has given me such confidence that we can all look, feel, chat, laugh and fuck any way we want!

Just be you! I honestly think people are attracted to each other’s minds as-well as the bodies.

It’s true that Most people will have some insecurities whenever they meet. But with time and going to clubs/ meets most of us have realised they really don’t matter as it’s about the fun at the end of the day.

There is really so much choice that there will always be some people you’re attracted to and likewise them towards you.

Enjoy them as that’s the fun!

Mrs P x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mmmm..i feel the same. I also have a cs scar and very self conscious about it, add into the mix i also feel ancient and it makes me feel like poo...if someone compliments me i rationalise that because they just want sex..with anyone..not me in particular.

Doesn't help that i'm a fussy cow as well...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all have hang ups. But its what's on the inside that counts. A cheeky smile and sence of humour do it for me. Bigger the body = more places to kiss and tease xx

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By *ollipop77Couple
over a year ago

Sunny Manchester

Just do it! I have thunderous thighs and a Jelly belly but that’s because I am a fantastic cook and and a mother of three amazing children.

I started by going to a club, you see people of all shapes and sizes and found it a massive confidence boost. I totally couldn’t care less if some people don’t like my shape, there are some people that absolutely love it!

You are beautiful exactly the way you are, own it and love it. Xx

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By *awty_twosomeCouple
over a year ago

Kent

"Mmmm..i feel the same. I also have a cs scar and very self conscious about it, add into the mix i also feel ancient and it makes me feel like poo...if someone compliments me i rationalise that because they just want sex..with anyone..not me in particular.

Doesn't help that i'm a fussy cow as well...

You definately have nothing to worry about, and we live far enough away that you can be sure this is a genuine compliment..... you are bloody hot, red hot!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I went back to WW on Thursday and was horrified when I got on the scales. I nearly cried. And it's all my own doing. I started following a lass on insta who is a body beautiful champion, so far I'm encouraged but still feel a fat knacker

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should not beat yourself up over it - everyone is different and you should be happy however you look - there is so much pressure to conform to a certain type nowadays and it really annoys me - well done you for posting on here xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are beautiful.

Dont ever change to suit the whim of anyone else. We only get to choose from those who are attracted to us and dont get to choose who should be attracted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP please don't ever feel that way. There are more than a few guys on here who appreciate women who are built just the way the Good Lord intended. Clubs like Chams have nights dedicated to girls with curves and they are very well attended.

From your profile pics you appear to have a gorgeous body. I would love to bump into you at a club.

I hope this thread gives you confidence to dip your toes in the water and help you see yourself through our eyes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be proud of who you are and how you look....evetyone is beautiful in their own right

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey...You done the right thing with showing your pics and then letting folk decide for themselves.

There are way heavier people on fab than you so stop beating yourself up! Loads of guys are attracted to bigger ladies so iv no doubt you will be inundated with offers.

Good luck.x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My wife is heavy and had the same reservations but meeting has actually transformed her confidence might not be same for everyone but if you select your meets we'll check verifications you should enjoy it

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By *uliette500Woman
over a year ago

Hull

I had the same thoughts when I first signed up on here.

5 months later my confidence has grown so much.

If guys don't like me how I am I'm fine with that there are plenty out there that do.

Give the guys a chance if they have seen your pics and are still interested chances are they will not be put off when they meet you.

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter

"Curvy women are very popular on here. This is a very body-positive community.

I would be very surprised if you didn't leave us speechless with desire when we see your photos. "

Unfortunately thst body positivity is less for men

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By *iBBW and hubbyCouple
over a year ago

oxford

Thin does not equal sexy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doesn't help that i'm a fussy cow as well...

You definately have nothing to worry about, and we live far enough away that you can be sure this is a genuine compliment..... you are bloody hot, red hot!!!! "

Thankyou for the lovely comment x

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By *azkinsWoman
over a year ago

leeds

Sexy isn't how you look sexy is how you are. I. Just wish I could believe it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always feel like this. Always wonder why people want to meet me.

Your pics look great...you're thinner than me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thin does not equal sexy.

Sadly in my head I think it does

I'm a size 16 at the moment. That's an XL in some clothes. Makes me feel bad.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always feel like this. Always wonder why people want to meet me.

Your pics look great...you're thinner than me "

Speaking of great pics

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By *ardinal FangMan
over a year ago

Sandy

OP there is nothing wrong with you pics, nothing wrong at all.

The smoking would put me off though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You look great. From experience it's a lot more about your personality and confidence than size. Confidence is far sexier. Go for it feet head and boobs first. You will have great fun. And the ones who do make comments are not worth your time. Mrsx

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

OP I felt the same when I was new on here. I soon got over myself. Don't let your body issues spoil your life.

Yes being fat isn't great, but there a far worse things a person can be

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP - I get you, like REALLY get you.

For a long time I lived my life in the shadow of my weight.

I am now out of the shadow most of the time, but from time to time it still throws me some shade.

I lost a bit of weight (about 3 stone in total), but my body is still far from perfect - it sags, it wobbles in places, I have stretch marks and the only way I have of getting rid of my moobs will be via the surgeons knife.

Psychologically, I am fatter in my head than my logical self knows I am.

No matter how much I go to the gym or how much more weight I lose, a bit of me will always be fat.

However, after giving myself a bloody good talking to, I know that I am more (much more) than my weight & build.

I know my weight is not the sum of me, it is some of me.

I have confidence but I also have vulnerabilities and I have found that by addressing them head on has reduced the amount of times I knock myself.

When you feel low and have a downer on yourself, it can sometimes be hard to function, let alone arrange a meet an turn up at that meet feeling both sexy and sexual.

I can hazard a guess that most of your unhappiness is made up of self loathing - you need to find a way of starting to like you, both with weight and without.

Shedding the pounds is the easy part, shedding the weight in your head and accepting you for you are the toughies.

They are all do-able

It has got to come from you though

I took myself out of the meeting loop whilst I sorted my head out

Meets should make you feel good, not feel crappy and worried

I wish you well in addressing things

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Psychologically, I am fatter in my head than my logical self knows I am.

Shedding the pounds is the easy part, shedding the weight in your head and accepting you for you are the toughies.

They are all do-able

It has got to come from you though

I took myself out of the meeting loop whilst I sorted my head out

Meets should make you feel good, not feel crappy and worried

I wish you well in addressing things

Yep. Absolutely this. This is where I am. People can say what they like. Throw all the compliments in the world. But unless your head is where it should be they are meaningless and ineffective.

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By *aisyDDWoman
over a year ago

North West

Be yourself. Most people are faking confidence. Someone said have a social first which is a really good idea.

Chatting to the guys for a bit is also good. You’ll figure them out. I hope people don’t knock other people on here for their weight. If you look on the forums there’s guys looking for all sorts that is women have hang ups about. You look great btw

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It works both ways. I struggle as I'm underweight and have body confidence issues because of it.

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

Just have fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont think you've anything to worry about i think you look great. Personally i prefer a larger lady and love your pics. ??

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By *ettyboop61Woman
over a year ago

St Neots

I joined slimming world lost nearly 2stone....feel a lot better in myself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/06/19 21:59:39]

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By *issy and GingeCouple
over a year ago

Poole

Missy has put a lot of weight on due to her medication and it’s destroyed her self confidence.

Doesn’t want to be seen in the nuddie or at least doesn’t think any one would want to see her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Missy has put a lot of weight on due to her medication and it’s destroyed her self confidence.

Doesn’t want to be seen in the nuddie or at least doesn’t think any one would want to see her.

She is a hot lady your a lucky guy. I’d be more happy to see her naked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lots of men love the bigger ladies.

You will get some people who don't but there is always plenty more that do.

Doesn't quite work for the bigger men on this site in the same way but that's life, and those that dont try dont know what they are missing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always feel like this. Always wonder why people want to meet me.

Your pics look great...you're thinner than me

Speaking of great pics

Thank you xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I second that

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By *ralpleaser36Man
over a year ago

Swindon

I am so much more attracted to a ladies personality rather than her looks and I think a lot of men are. It’s not that I don’t have “standards” but those “standards” are completely based on how a she is as a person rather than how she looks or what size she is.

Ever been to a restaurant where the food looks good but tasted shit?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

John Lennon said that life happens whilst we are busy making plan’

Enjoy life, focus on the pleasures your body can provide, what it does for you, every single day! Wear your experiences, pleasures and indulgence with Pride, eat the cake, drink the wine, be alive!

If you need to have less fat cells on your body for the sake of your health then eat less cake, (but never wait or put off living in the mean time ) if you don’t want to deprive yourself then enjoy! If you make that choice Then own it!

We have fat cells, scars, wrinkles, I walk with a limp some of the time, don’t put off enjoying yourself because you plan to have less fat cells some time in the future. It might never happen. When another person looks at you in lust they are considering your best bits, try not to worry and if all else fails fake it until you make it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn’t worry about it, your pics are fine and I’m sure you’ll get lots of positive attention

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By *merald Eyes XWoman
over a year ago

Can you find me….

I was the same when I first came on....

I was originally a size 24 and didn’t come on fab until I was a size 20 , cause I didn’t think men would fine me attractive.

I met some wonderful people and I’m now a size 12, some friends have supported me on my journey.

If a man likes you it won’t bother him, hopefully he will encourage you.

The fabs help my confidence and my self esteem grew and the more I bought clothes and lingerie I began to feel very sexy about myself.

I still worry about wobbly skin , but you can’t have everything....

If you ever fancy a chat private message me.

I wish you luck on your weight loss journey as it was life changing for me.

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

Anyone else feel like this?

It sounds like your perception of yourself is eating your confidence.

How do you remove that drag on your mind?

Two things really:

a) Embrace who you are wholly and let others worry whether you are for them or not

b) Do something to remove the cause of your anxiety, e.g. set yourself a target weight.

On the 2nd point, I've seen people make that change and yet still find reasons to put themselves down, which suggests weight was never the cause of the self-esteem issue in the first place.

Hope this helps

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By *arkb73Man
over a year ago

Cheshire/Staffs

OP - you look great and most men like curves on a lady xx

Very few ladies like a curvy man though - doesn’t seem fair does it?

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By *JohnMan
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

"Very few ladies like a curvy man though"

Enough of them do. They might not be so vocal about it, but there's plenty of appreciation for the dad bod.

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By *arkb73Man
over a year ago

Cheshire/Staffs

"Very few ladies like a curvy man though

Enough of them do. They might not be so vocal about it, but there's plenty of appreciation for the dad bod."

Not that I’ve ever noticed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why not just try being open about your body, put some full body pics up. You might be surprised by the response you get, guys like women of all shapes and sizes.

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter

"Very few ladies like a curvy man though

Enough of them do. They might not be so vocal about it, but there's plenty of appreciation for the dad bod.

Not that I’ve ever noticed "

Exactly. I do OK despite my physique, not because of it!

I don't think people appreciate that men can have things that seriously knock their confidence and also other people's perception of them. For example another poster further up mentioned man-boobs that won't shift despite huge weight loss - that's because some of us actually do grow breast tissue in adolescence and it's not even linked to being fat. Although when you're growing up you don't know this l, other kids take the piss and you grow up in a 'fat kid' mindset even though you're not. And even as an adult people see you have a bit of a bust and assume you're lazy, don't take care of yourself etc etc when actually it's just the way you're built.

I know in severe cases you can get reduction surgery but it' d be a lot less hassle if people were a bit more accepting.

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter

"I was the same when I first came on....

I was originally a size 24 and didn’t come on fab until I was a size 20 , cause I didn’t think men would fine me attractive.

I met some wonderful people and I’m now a size 12, some friends have supported me on my journey.

If a man likes you it won’t bother him, hopefully he will encourage you.

The fabs help my confidence and my self esteem grew and the more I bought clothes and lingerie I began to feel very sexy about myself.

I still worry about wobbly skin , but you can’t have everything....

If you ever fancy a chat private message me.

I wish you luck on your weight loss journey as it was life changing for me.

You look fantastic, congratulations 3

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone is a different size and shape, everyone is unique, be happy with yourself and that confidence will shine through, many people will find you attractive we are sure xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably a bit late to join in as the majority of posts are a couple of weeks old but here's my bit for what its worth? So good to see so many positive posts, from both sexes! As people have said this community is far less body conscious than the world!

I once met a girl who was similar to you,'had weight issues and lacking confidence from a previous abusive relationship?" I always thought she was THE most gorgeous girl and was with her for some 18 months before tragically my health seriously got in the way. We had quite a few meets and she in my opinion was the sexiest person I'd ever seen! Her smile was enchanting! Don't worry o.p. as many have said there'll be plenty of interest and hopefully the more meets you have the more your confidence will grow? Feel sexy in yourself and you'll be sexy! Listen to the girls and do the socials. If a guys not interested? Well it's his loss? There'll be plenty who are! Take the plunge and enjoy what's on offer. Nail a smile on your face and feel desired again.

Best of luck! Enjoy!

Very best wishes!!!

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By *attooedBBWWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

Honestly, stop worrying.

I’m a UK Size 24 with big thighs, ass, belly, boobs etc, stretch marks, cellulite all dressed up with a smile because for some people I’m sexy, others I’m not.

The moment you stop worrying is the moment you realise that there are literally 100’s of people who will find you attractive and you’ll have some awesome fun!

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By *iReyWoman
over a year ago

Cheshire East

You look beautiful!

I know the feeling though I've just lost 40lbs after a relationship breakdown, going from a size 22-24 to a 16-18 and I feel more self conscious now than I did then! Just be honest about your dress size, upload honest pics and you'll be fine

like someone else said the swinging community is very inclusive of all body shapes and sizes.

Some people may find me disgusting others will want to eat my ass until the cows come home. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder my dear

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel your pain op. I don't even let Mr D see me fully naked.

It is something I'm actively working on but these things take time, I have managed to not get fully naked during any meet yet lol.

You are beautiful don't let anyone tell you otherwise xx

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By *cedbunsWoman
over a year ago

Gravesend

I would echo what a lot of others have said. Swingers are an inclusive bunch most of the time. And in my experience love a curve. Fab has done wonders for my self confidence and I’m happier in my own skin now more than ever.

Maybe consider a curvy night at a club to ease yourself in

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By *attooedBBWWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

"I would echo what a lot of others have said. Swingers are an inclusive bunch most of the time. And in my experience love a curve. Fab has done wonders for my self confidence and I’m happier in my own skin now more than ever.

Maybe consider a curvy night at a club to ease yourself in "

I second this suggestion about curvy nights!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My mrs is not confident of her body and is curvy.

Would you say to take her to a curvy girl night at a club to try get her to feel comfortable in herself again?

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By *ltcouple666Couple
over a year ago

cheshire

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

Totally know how you feel....I feel the same....I'm addressing my weight too but it takes time as you say...but you know what, all this isn't reserved for slim people only....a fuller figure can be just as sexy..it's all about attitude and confidence....dont wait to have fun....

K x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My mrs is not confident of her body and is curvy.

Would you say to take her to a curvy girl night at a club to try get her to feel comfortable in herself again? "

Going to a bbw or curvy club type of event will soon have her with bags of confidence. Regardless whether she plays or not.

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By *cedbunsWoman
over a year ago

Gravesend

"My mrs is not confident of her body and is curvy.

Would you say to take her to a curvy girl night at a club to try get her to feel comfortable in herself again? "

yes definitely. Curve lovers will help her love herself more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve felt very similar to you in the past and I always get nervous about a meet, because even though I have pictures of myself and I’m very honest about my size I can’t help but think I look a lot worse in person, but I know that’s my confidence issues more than actual fact.

Being on here has helped my confidence a lot, I’ve met some lovely men who have been very complimentary and appreciative of my lumps and bumps. However, feeling better about yourself is ultimately about you and what’s going on in your head. Just try to love yourself a bit more.

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By *lienrockMan
over a year ago

Fife

Have you seen the OP profile pics guys. She's cute from what I could see, no need to be concerned instead be confident. You look great OP

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By *olexMan
over a year ago

Hull

"I feel the same : ( one thing ive learnt is that everyone is sexy on here in their own way. I love seeing peoples confidence and wish i had some. Ur beautiful and ur body is great

xx"

You can rock sexy lingerie like nobody's beeswax. You have nothing to worry about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

I think you've a nice body and veryy nice legs

don't be put off or feel insecure x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh my goodness- so many of you lovely ladies having a downer about your bodies- it makes me feel sad.

OP- I think your body looks great. I hope you find some confidence to show it off to its full potential soon!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every Body is Beautiful naked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People should accept the way you are personality is more important in my eyes we always say big is beautiful xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My mrs is not confident of her body and is curvy.

Would you say to take her to a curvy girl night at a club to try get her to feel comfortable in herself again?

Going to a bbw or curvy club type of event will soon have her with bags of confidence. Regardless whether she plays or not. "

Thank you, I’ll try get her to see light and try our local club on curvy night.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My mrs is not confident of her body and is curvy.

Would you say to take her to a curvy girl night at a club to try get her to feel comfortable in herself again?

Going to a bbw or curvy club type of event will soon have her with bags of confidence. Regardless whether she plays or not.

Thank you, I’ll try get her to see light and try our local club on curvy night. "

Wait you have curvy night? That sounds like heaven tbh

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By *JohnMan
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

"Wait you have curvy night?"

It's a great night

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Trust me, being curvy for a single female is no impedement to having enjoyable meets

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because I'm overweight... but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

You're a beautiful woman, don't be worried

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same here. Very low self confidence x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know exactly what you mean. Meeting that first person is difficult and for me that has never changed. But being on fab has boosted my confidence over time altho I do have other issues that make me feel not good enough to be on here. But the people I have met have been very understanding and give me that kick I need to realise I can work through it. Plus once i discovered how much fun being on here can be....the weight just fell off !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think you look great in the public pics, nice set of boobies... be confident.

This site in the majority is a positive place...enjoy it for all it offers"

Yes, yes and yes!

Totally agree with that. This thread has so many confidence boosting posts for fellow Fabbers. Love it! Needs to reach more people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sexy isn't how you look sexy is how you are. I. Just wish I could believe it

Pow there it is... believe it!

#Powerful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

I think gym guy into heavy lift won't be an issue

, but hey not all are perfect and best part is mind establish connection not body, however, mind stimulate body parts. Look for mind not body I am sure you would be nice person and do well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

Your not the only one to feel this way...add to that i feel so old ..it's not a good feeling.

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By *ossauMan
over a year ago

Perth

"Aww you guys

Thanks so much for the positive messages!"

I'll add my positive message. You are lovely outside and in. A sexless marriage is soul destroying an takes time. The good thing is you want to get out for a Fab time, so you will. I did.

I just wish I wasn't too old for you! x

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By *oober698Man
over a year ago

Lincoln

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

Hello

I'm gonna message you privately so look out for it amongst all the others!!

G x

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By *oober698Man
over a year ago

Lincoln

"Same here. Very low self confidence x"

Wow, you do not need to worry.

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter

In the last 2-3 months I have lost nearly 20kg after struggling with weight since my teens. Without changing my diet or exercise habits (they're not amazing but I do have them!)

I have been trying very hard to control my diet, eat healthily eat less, exercise more etc etc. Result ? Still fat, still felt awful. I've been in a pretty bad decline for so long it felt like normal. Not only that but I was noticing physiological similarities between myself and my late father who was only five years older than I am now when he died suddenly. Because of this I have been trying to crack the puzzle for many years now.

It was an accidental discovery. I've been eating acid reflux meds like sweets for two whole years. I switched brand. Two weeks later I still had a half pack left and I was getting up earlier. I had also been reading about Cortisol. I compared the two heartburn mint packs. Identical ingredients bar one has some magnesium in. Read about Cortisol some more. Then about Magnesium deficiency. Then put two and two together and decided to experiment. Bam! Two months and I'm lighter than I was at 30. Not only that I feel like a decade of brain fog has lifted. I'm sharper and quicker and have more mental clarity than I remember. And a load of energy. Honestly I've never felt better. The same solution might not work for you. But never give up on a solution falling in your lap by accident..... Even if you're drawing a blank finding one.

If anyone has any Q's feel free to ask on thread orb by PM if it's personal.

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter

BTW my profile pic is from 20kg heavier ago

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By *ordescourtMan
over a year ago

Warrington

[Removed by poster at 04/07/19 17:49:43]

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By *ordescourtMan
over a year ago

Warrington

"In the last 2-3 months I have lost nearly 20kg after struggling with weight since my teens. Without changing my diet or exercise habits (they're not amazing but I do have them!)

If anyone has any Q's feel free to ask on thread orb by PM if it's personal.

"
I would like a bit more information please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly don’t worry it.

As a larger lady myself just make sure check you your there type from there verifications if they have only meet slim people don’t waste your time.

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By *unningFoxWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

How much longer you will wait to live your life? I have heard this all my life. I can’t wait better times, bodies or more money in my life to do things and enjoy it. Just put yourself out there and believe me there is man who will appreciate you as you are.

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter

"I would like a bit more information please "

For sure but you might need to ask more specific questions as I haven't got round to writing the pamphlet yet lol

But in general if you look up magnesium deficiency on Google you'll find plenty of lists of what to look for to know if you might have it or not.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I have more wobbly bits than a plate of jelly!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my experience on here many men like a bigger curvy woman. Ive had no complaints. Its stated on my profile so if anyone has an issue they can look elsewhere

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By *heSidheCouple
over a year ago

Colchester

I don't think weight is to much of an issue on here, most swinger's are open minded.

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By *uilder506Man
over a year ago

bognor

Bones are for dogs .

Nothing better than a bit of meat on a woman

Curves are better than ribs poking out x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

full body woman are sexy love a big bun and big boobs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In the last 2-3 months I have lost nearly 20kg after struggling with weight since my teens. Without changing my diet or exercise habits (they're not amazing but I do have them!)

If anyone has any Q's feel free to ask on thread orb by PM if it's personal.

That's amazing, well done you

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By *agenta400Woman
over a year ago

All over the shop

Anyone else feel like this?

I'm going to add some full body pics to my profile so at least anyone I'm chatting to can see what I look like, but it's the actual meeting that I feel too fat and unfit for

Sweetheart,

I am a big BBW with damaged legs. Size 32 and 40K tits. I’m one big fat woman.

Prior to starting all this swinging lark in February I hadn’t had sex for 6yrs and was seriously depressed about my body. Especially my lower legs which swell.

The swinging has been the biggest boost to my confidence ever. Lots of men LOVE curvy women. They will worship you and it is intoxicating. I’ve had some amazing fucks and met some gorgeous souls.

Discernment is key.

Get your beautiful body out there and enjoy.

Whatever you think about it, plenty will adore your body. And it will literally feel great. Don’t deny yourself pleasure.

I’m going to challenge myself at some point by going to AbFabs or Eurekas. Naked in/by a pool. I don’t go to normal pools!!

Big love,

MM xxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sweetheart,

I am a big BBW with damaged legs. Size 32 and 40K tits. I’m one big fat woman.

Prior to starting all this swinging lark in February I hadn’t had sex for 6yrs and was seriously depressed about my body. Especially my lower legs which swell.

The swinging has been the biggest boost to my confidence ever. Lots of men LOVE curvy women. They will worship you and it is intoxicating. I’ve had some amazing fucks and met some gorgeous souls.

Discernment is key.

Get your beautiful body out there and enjoy. "

This with bells on!!!

You have to love yourself before you love others!!!

Being Body positivity is the key... the UK is known for being one of the worst for body positivity.

So as the ole chinese saying it goes,"fuck it, fuck what others think, I AM A Fucking Goddess and I look amazing"

Get out there and show the world you are that Goddess...

Best wishes

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