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"Any advice appreciated but i met a guy on here, we got on really really well,wasn't looking for anything other than just a casually but fun friend.. however things got more intense and we couldn't keep away, i was falling for him and him for me. All was going great until i bumped into him & his wife and gorgeous 2 kids in a supermarket.. i was crushed & now im scared to get back into the swing of things, shall we say. I obviously stopped seeing him but all im doing is searching for him. Do i take a break, or get back on the horse and try and find a nicer ride??" Was he on a single profile ? | |||
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"Take a break, clear your head and your feelings and carry on for what was the reason you joined this site.... If it was to find love maybe look elsewhere" Good advice | |||
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"Any advice appreciated but i met a guy on here, we got on really really well,wasn't looking for anything other than just a casually but fun friend.. however things got more intense and we couldn't keep away, i was falling for him and him for me. All was going great until i bumped into him & his wife and gorgeous 2 kids in a supermarket.. i was crushed & now im scared to get back into the swing of things, shall we say. I obviously stopped seeing him but all im doing is searching for him. Do i take a break, or get back on the horse and try and find a nicer ride?? Was he on a single profile ?" Does it make any difference to what she is facing? OP, maybe you need to rethink about what you're wanting. Sounds like you may need to set some carefully constructed boundaries accordingly so as not to let it happen again. Getting too involved without red flags in strategic places is dangerous unless that's what you want. Taking a break may help you with this issue, it may not. Maybe meeting one or two without meeting them again may help to move on too. Only you can really know. | |||
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"Any advice appreciated but i met a guy on here, we got on really really well,wasn't looking for anything other than just a casually but fun friend.. however things got more intense and we couldn't keep away, i was falling for him and him for me. All was going great until i bumped into him & his wife and gorgeous 2 kids in a supermarket.. i was crushed & now im scared to get back into the swing of things, shall we say. I obviously stopped seeing him but all im doing is searching for him. Do i take a break, or get back on the horse and try and find a nicer ride?? Was he on a single profile ? Does it make any difference to what she is facing? OP, maybe you need to rethink about what you're wanting. Sounds like you may need to set some carefully constructed boundaries accordingly so as not to let it happen again. Getting too involved without red flags in strategic places is dangerous unless that's what you want. Taking a break may help you with this issue, it may not. Maybe meeting one or two without meeting them again may help to move on too. Only you can really know." Does it make any difference ? Of course it does !! He played her like a cheap guitar - completely different getting used and treated like a fool by a married man as to a potential relationship with a single guy that simply foundered. | |||
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"No he claimed to be single. They were holding hands so was pretty obvious. However we were in there holding hands the week before. " That was very brave or very stupid of him. If he goes there with his wife, anyone could have seen you with him. | |||
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"Find a guy and fuck him senseless. Youl soon get over him. " Well just so you know that if that ever happens you and you need to fuck someone senseless...i will let you know where to find me | |||
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"Any advice appreciated but i met a guy on here, we got on really really well,wasn't looking for anything other than just a casually but fun friend.. however things got more intense and we couldn't keep away, i was falling for him and him for me. All was going great until i bumped into him & his wife and gorgeous 2 kids in a supermarket.. i was crushed & now im scared to get back into the swing of things, shall we say. I obviously stopped seeing him but all im doing is searching for him. Do i take a break, or get back on the horse and try and find a nicer ride?? Was he on a single profile ?" Would it make it any better if he had a couples profile without his wife's knowledge? | |||
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"Find a guy and fuck him senseless. Youl soon get over him. " As stated above. It’s a horrible feeling to know that you’ve been deceived, worse also that he had included you in his deception. Though, not everyone is an arsehole. There shall be plenty more men to choose from that are not playing away. I can assure you, there shall also be better sex. | |||
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"That's why you shouldn't fall for someone and meet other people so less risk" You can’t choose emotion, only decide what to do with it. OP he’s a fucking wankstain and you’re hurting. Go through it and it will get easier. Do whatever you think you need to do to help yourself. | |||
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"The best way to get over a man is to get under another one. You're worth more than this scumbag - I pity his poor sucker of a wife." I'm not a lover of this advice | |||
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"Any advice appreciated but i met a guy on here, we got on really really well,wasn't looking for anything other than just a casually but fun friend.. however things got more intense and we couldn't keep away, i was falling for him and him for me. All was going great until i bumped into him & his wife and gorgeous 2 kids in a supermarket.. i was crushed & now im scared to get back into the swing of things, shall we say. I obviously stopped seeing him but all im doing is searching for him. Do i take a break, or get back on the horse and try and find a nicer ride??" I really feel for you - being lied to and having your emotions used and abused is dreadful and unforgivable. There are loads of couples who have met through fab so ignore those who don’t understand the possibility - just a pity he was a lying twat who didn’t deserve your time. Without knowing your circumstances - you may have non-fab friends you can confide in - the hardest thing could be not being able to talk this disaster through with others. If that’s the case, I hope you take some comfort from your fab friends. Delete him from your life and def get back on the horse - the best revenge Xxx Ms | |||
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"I cannot PM you and you probably can’t me. I’m not going to put my story on here but know this - it is not your fault - you were not stupid - he is a cunt - it’s going to hurt like hell for a while but you’ll survive Be good to yourself. V x " | |||
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"The best way to get over a man is to get under another one. You're worth more than this scumbag - I pity his poor sucker of a wife. I'm not a lover of this advice " Really? On a swingers site? Maybe 'take a break then come back and look for someone more honest to have an emotional connection with' would be more appropriate? | |||
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"I’ve been there and all I can say is take a break from anything you associate with him if that’s what you need OR do what I did and dive head first into arranging meets with some nice fab peeps and get over that son of a beeeeeech I’d also send a message to his wife outing his behaviour. So it doesn’t happen to another woman or more importantly to her again! I’d did it and although she thought I was an ass hat she was eventually really glad I did as it turns out he was a serial dater and had 3 other women in the same boat! Why people think it’s ok to feck with peoples feelings like that I’ll never know, but it happens way too often" that's just nasty and twisted ffs | |||
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"I know it's very sad but the man you you were falling for doesn't exist, he was showing you a fantasy persona as it wasn't really him, the things he said to you about himself were not true. I know it hurts really bad, but you were falling for a fantasy, there are nice people on here who will be honest with you, I hope you find one and have a lot of fun." I couldn't have put that first part better if I tried Take a lil time out OP then come back renewed is what I would say. Oh and block the twat as he'll likely try and worm his way back in x | |||
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"The best way to get over a man is to get under another one. You're worth more than this scumbag - I pity his poor sucker of a wife. I'm not a lover of this advice Really? On a swingers site? Maybe 'take a break then come back and look for someone more honest to have an emotional connection with' would be more appropriate?" I'm not a lover of that either | |||
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"Any advice appreciated but i met a guy on here, we got on really really well,wasn't looking for anything other than just a casually but fun friend.. however things got more intense and we couldn't keep away, i was falling for him and him for me. All was going great until i bumped into him & his wife and gorgeous 2 kids in a supermarket.. i was crushed & now im scared to get back into the swing of things, shall we say. I obviously stopped seeing him but all im doing is searching for him. Do i take a break, or get back on the horse and try and find a nicer ride?? Was he on a single profile ? Does it make any difference to what she is facing? OP, maybe you need to rethink about what you're wanting. Sounds like you may need to set some carefully constructed boundaries accordingly so as not to let it happen again. Getting too involved without red flags in strategic places is dangerous unless that's what you want. Taking a break may help you with this issue, it may not. Maybe meeting one or two without meeting them again may help to move on too. Only you can really know. Does it make any difference ? Of course it does !! He played her like a cheap guitar - completely different getting used and treated like a fool by a married man as to a potential relationship with a single guy that simply foundered." She was looking if she's ruined fab for herself, whether to continue, what to do now this had happened, not so much shall I continue with this man, is there anything to go on, is there any potential. There isn't other than to continue with him which I think most assumed as has she that it's not happening. She was looking to the next step unless I have completely misread her post. | |||
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"Some people jump straight back on the horse. I wait. Affairs of the heart take time for me to wrap my head around. I have to shield myself in some way to prevent myself from getting hurt. Try to shield others from any hurt I may accidentally cause, by being open about things and getting fear off my chest. Love hurts when it goes tits up, worse than any physical pain. Confusion, paranoia, rejection, loss, grief and in your particular case.. lies. They hurt like fuck. Which is why I'm rather cagey and protective about letting certain people, in certain situations get too close. Despite all that, some people still get under the skin. We can't help who we fall for. If it's not fun anymore, take a break. You can always come back if you miss it. Or just use the Forum for a bit of fun and forget about sex for a bit?" This....well said | |||
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"They say the best way to get over someone is to meet someone else and I am sure your inbox will be full of decent offers." They also forget to say that can damage you in the long run | |||
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"My advice would steer clear of him you don't want to break a marriage up especially with children men have no conscience when cheating she won't even know he is on fab good luck liz x" ...and other quotes from www.sweepingstatements.com | |||
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"Yes he admitted its his wife and 2 kids. He said " his tried to leave her before but she holds the kids to ransom." Im not sure what to believe and have blocked him on everything, but he did post a letter through my door saying he was heartbroken. Thanks for all the comments i really appreciate them. I think il take a break for a few weeks and then try again. " He's lied to you, his wife and his family. The bloke is thoroughly dishonest. He could have told you from the start.... he's heartbroken that he has lost his leg over, nothing more. Don't fall for it. | |||
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"Yes he admitted its his wife and 2 kids. He said " his tried to leave her before but she holds the kids to ransom." Im not sure what to believe and have blocked him on everything, but he did post a letter through my door saying he was heartbroken. Thanks for all the comments i really appreciate them. I think il take a break for a few weeks and then try again. " If he lies to the person who is supposed to be his partner in life than he will lie to to anybody, now and in the future. Regardless of whether he's heartbroken, he still is very capable of weaving a web of lies. Whatever would happen in the future, that is always going to be part of how he is capable of behaving. | |||
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"Yes he admitted its his wife and 2 kids. He said " his tried to leave her before but she holds the kids to ransom." Im not sure what to believe and have blocked him on everything, but he did post a letter through my door saying he was heartbroken. Thanks for all the comments i really appreciate them. I think il take a break for a few weeks and then try again. " This is a tale as old as time. Sorry its happened to you but the harsh reality of sites like this is that people lie. You need to arm yourself against that. I think its best to discount everything he's told you as I suspect its a last ditch effort on his part to get you to continue the arrangement. | |||
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"Take a break, clear your head and your feelings and carry on for what was the reason you joined this site.... If it was to find love maybe look elsewhere" good advice | |||
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"I'm sorry you've been deceived OP, if in fact you have been. But unless you ask him who she was, I guess you'll never know. One thing I will say. Someone mentioned contacting his wife. Please don't. If you're feeling hurt and betrayed, she will feel a million times more hurt and betrayed... After all, she didn't meet him on a swinging site for sex and just happen to fall for him (I don't mean to sound harsh, but it's just not the same as a marriage... as a family). All that 'woman scorned' type behaviour does is to destroy innocent lives. Have some compassion. If you need to talk things out with him and tell him what you think of him, by all means do it. But don't hurt or punish his family. " Erm if my other half was playing away and treating me like an idiot I would want to know! | |||
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"Any advice appreciated but i met a guy on here, we got on really really well,wasn't looking for anything other than just a casually but fun friend.. however things got more intense and we couldn't keep away, i was falling for him and him for me. All was going great until i bumped into him & his wife and gorgeous 2 kids in a supermarket.. i was crushed & now im scared to get back into the swing of things, shall we say. I obviously stopped seeing him but all im doing is searching for him. Do i take a break, or get back on the horse and try and find a nicer ride?? Was he on a single profile ? Would it make it any better if he had a couples profile without his wife's knowledge? " At least the OP would have known he was a lying cheating B**tard lol | |||
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"Yes he admitted its his wife and 2 kids. He said " his tried to leave her before but she holds the kids to ransom." Im not sure what to believe and have blocked him on everything, but he did post a letter through my door saying he was heartbroken. Thanks for all the comments i really appreciate them. I think il take a break for a few weeks and then try again. " Personally i would take the letter he put through your door go around to his workplace and push it as far down his throat as it will go! He is playing you off against his family | |||
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"I'm sorry you've been deceived OP, if in fact you have been. But unless you ask him who she was, I guess you'll never know. One thing I will say. Someone mentioned contacting his wife. Please don't. If you're feeling hurt and betrayed, she will feel a million times more hurt and betrayed... After all, she didn't meet him on a swinging site for sex and just happen to fall for him (I don't mean to sound harsh, but it's just not the same as a marriage... as a family). All that 'woman scorned' type behaviour does is to destroy innocent lives. Have some compassion. If you need to talk things out with him and tell him what you think of him, by all means do it. But don't hurt or punish his family. Erm if my other half was playing away and treating me like an idiot I would want to know! " That's you though. She may not. Her kids may not. She may feel humiliated. She may have a breakdown. She may harm herself. Unless you know the person involved and how they may react, telling them may present a far bigger risk than you might realise. | |||
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"Any advice appreciated but i met a guy on here, we got on really really well,wasn't looking for anything other than just a casually but fun friend.. however things got more intense and we couldn't keep away, i was falling for him and him for me. All was going great until i bumped into him & his wife and gorgeous 2 kids in a supermarket.. i was crushed & now im scared to get back into the swing of things, shall we say. I obviously stopped seeing him but all im doing is searching for him. Do i take a break, or get back on the horse and try and find a nicer ride??" Oh crap He's a liar and played you well. So sorry OP Take a break, delete his number if you had it. Block him etc If you need a break from fab then definitely take it. If you come back make direct questions re relationship statuses part of your pre social chat. Add a warning on your profile. You will get over it. Especially when you visualise him lying to his partner and children about where he was and lying to you every time you were together. Would you do that to someone you care for? He's an arse even if he was nice to you, he didn't care about ramifications to you. There's better both out there and on fab | |||
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"I'm sorry you've been deceived OP, if in fact you have been. But unless you ask him who she was, I guess you'll never know. One thing I will say. Someone mentioned contacting his wife. Please don't. If you're feeling hurt and betrayed, she will feel a million times more hurt and betrayed... After all, she didn't meet him on a swinging site for sex and just happen to fall for him (I don't mean to sound harsh, but it's just not the same as a marriage... as a family). All that 'woman scorned' type behaviour does is to destroy innocent lives. Have some compassion. If you need to talk things out with him and tell him what you think of him, by all means do it. But don't hurt or punish his family. Erm if my other half was playing away and treating me like an idiot I would want to know! That's you though. She may not. Her kids may not. She may feel humiliated. She may have a breakdown. She may harm herself. Unless you know the person involved and how they may react, telling them may present a far bigger risk than you might realise. " Rather get over it and meet a decent guy whose honest tbh x yes it's hard but there will always be people there to help through it I personally wouldn't want to live a lie x | |||
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"Any advice appreciated but i met a guy on here, we got on really really well,wasn't looking for anything other than just a casually but fun friend.. however things got more intense and we couldn't keep away, i was falling for him and him for me. All was going great until i bumped into him & his wife and gorgeous 2 kids in a supermarket.. i was crushed & now im scared to get back into the swing of things, shall we say. I obviously stopped seeing him but all im doing is searching for him. Do i take a break, or get back on the horse and try and find a nicer ride??" The moment there's any feelings then cut things short and move onto the next one. | |||
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"I'm sorry you've been deceived OP, if in fact you have been. But unless you ask him who she was, I guess you'll never know. One thing I will say. Someone mentioned contacting his wife. Please don't. If you're feeling hurt and betrayed, she will feel a million times more hurt and betrayed... After all, she didn't meet him on a swinging site for sex and just happen to fall for him (I don't mean to sound harsh, but it's just not the same as a marriage... as a family). All that 'woman scorned' type behaviour does is to destroy innocent lives. Have some compassion. If you need to talk things out with him and tell him what you think of him, by all means do it. But don't hurt or punish his family. Erm if my other half was playing away and treating me like an idiot I would want to know! That's you though. She may not. Her kids may not. She may feel humiliated. She may have a breakdown. She may harm herself. Unless you know the person involved and how they may react, telling them may present a far bigger risk than you might realise. " 100% agree with this. Plus it drags the OP into the middle of what could be a marriage breakup, through no fault of her own, potentially outs her as a swinger, and draws this whole sorry situation out as opposed to letting the dust settle & letting her get over it. She needs to put herself first & walk away from it all. The wife is not her responsibility. | |||
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"Find a guy and fuck him senseless. Youl soon get over him. " me me me choose me , bugger sounding desperate again | |||
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"I'm sorry you've been deceived OP, if in fact you have been. But unless you ask him who she was, I guess you'll never know. One thing I will say. Someone mentioned contacting his wife. Please don't. If you're feeling hurt and betrayed, she will feel a million times more hurt and betrayed... After all, she didn't meet him on a swinging site for sex and just happen to fall for him (I don't mean to sound harsh, but it's just not the same as a marriage... as a family). All that 'woman scorned' type behaviour does is to destroy innocent lives. Have some compassion. If you need to talk things out with him and tell him what you think of him, by all means do it. But don't hurt or punish his family. " You're right, but also wrong... this situation is so complex. His wife is living a lie, I wouldn't want my life to be false. Waste my chance on a lying c*nt. But taking action could backfire, who knows how she would react - it could be beyond imagination... This also applies to him. | |||
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