FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swinging Support and Advice

Meeting women/couples

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hi there everyone. I've been on this site for a few weeks now and only been in a serious conversation about a chat with a couple of people....out of those I have met 1.

Now I'm polite, genuine, gentleman with women or couples when I send messages but I never ever get any replies....and it is quite honestly pissing me off that is why I've recently updated my profile...

Any help in how the best way to go around sorting out meets would be really appreciated....

We're all here for one reason and I can't seem to get my share of why were here.. ..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try to not moan in statuses about not getting meets its unattractive.

Try to change your name to a more neutral name so as not to segregate other women

Talk more about who you are and what you have to offer

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

You've actually done remarkably well. Many guys go months or more without a meet, sometimes a reply. Women and couples are swamped here. There's more men than anyone else.

But you don't have a "share". That's horrifyingly entitled. This is a place where people meet people. If they want to. If they don't, they don't.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

And pissed off angry profiles are not good moves.

You're not owed a reply either. Delete without reply means no thank you. We don't have staff monitoring our inboxes and setting up our social calendars.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aughty But Nice TwiceWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract


"Hi there everyone. I've been on this site for a few weeks now and only been in a serious conversation about a chat with a couple of people....out of those I have met 1.

Now I'm polite, genuine, gentleman with women or couples when I send messages but I never ever get any replies....and it is quite honestly pissing me off that is why I've recently updated my profile...

Any help in how the best way to go around sorting out meets would be really appreciated....

We're all here for one reason and I can't seem to get my share of why were here.. .."

I'm actually surprised you got a meet within a week of joining with that self entitled attitude why not meet up again with your veri she seems keen x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hamboy69Man
over a year ago

huddersfield

I would say 95 percent of guys fail to get any action on here because they take the attitude that if they message enough people it will all fall into their lap.

It’s not about the numbers it’s about the right approach and putting in some effort.

Hit socials and make an effort to talk to people

Hit clubs and do the same

Lots of effort can be fun too and no worries quality single guys are in great demand if you’re willing to do some ground work

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a hard thing for single guys on fab, there's a hell of alot more of us on here than there are women so theyre gonna be bombarded with messages.

You've done well to get a meet so soon, just try and keep being polite and respectable and try not to moan too much (especially on forums)

No one is entitled to a reply back, if you dont hear anything back no matter how good your message was just forget about it and move on. Everyone has their preferences and you're not going to match everything.

Just keep at it and you'll eventually have more fun

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he riverdeep69Couple
over a year ago

North west ish

You are coming across as an entitled guy who is putting on a nice guy act to get meets. Maybe people see thro that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You are coming across as an entitled guy who is putting on a nice guy act to get meets. Maybe people see thro that. "

This

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one owes you a meet!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *r.BlondeMan
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

You need to become established

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"You are coming across as an entitled guy who is putting on a nice guy act to get meets. Maybe people see thro that. "

Yeah. The "nice guy" act often hides awful people who are best avoided.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi there everyone. I've been on this site for a few weeks now and only been in a serious conversation about a chat with a couple of people....out of those I have met 1.

Now I'm polite, genuine, gentleman with women or couples when I send messages but I never ever get any replies....and it is quite honestly pissing me off that is why I've recently updated my profile...

Any help in how the best way to go around sorting out meets would be really appreciated....

We're all here for one reason and I can't seem to get my share of why were here.. .."

your share? seriously?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks Luna.allure I will look into changing my name to something nuteral and keep on being polite....

Yes I know nobody is guaranteed a reply even a meet but when you try and try and just get no or not even a reply it quite demoralizing....

I will keep my pecker up and keep on trying....as the saying goes "If you don't make any calls, you ain t gonna get any sales"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Thanks Luna.allure I will look into changing my name to something nuteral and keep on being polite....

Yes I know nobody is guaranteed a reply even a meet but when you try and try and just get no or not even a reply it quite demoralizing....

I will keep my pecker up and keep on trying....as the saying goes "If you don't make any calls, you ain t gonna get any sales""

Doesn't mean it's a good attitude to have.

It also sucks to get the attitude of "you must cater to me" (from "you owe me a reply" to "I put an X in your inbox, spread your legs"). If that's any consolation.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

The river deep69.

So should I just come across as a dickhead who don't give a fuck....

I know I'm not entitled.....but I'm a polite guy who treats people with respect...

Maybe that's my downfall

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"The river deep69.

So should I just come across as a dickhead who don't give a fuck....

I know I'm not entitled.....but I'm a polite guy who treats people with respect...

Maybe that's my downfall "

So the only two things you can be is a manipulative dickhead or an overt dickhead?

... Good to know.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *r.BlondeMan
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral


"The river deep69.

So should I just come across as a dickhead who don't give a fuck....

I know I'm not entitled.....but I'm a polite guy who treats people with respect...

Maybe that's my downfall "

No, they just don't fancy you probably. Women and couples can have an abundant mindset on here. If you can't handle the heat get out of the kitchen.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Jesus you just cannot win.....if you couldnt message people privately ehy is there an option there.....

Hey everyone, thanks for the advice it's appreciated....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Jesus you just cannot win.....if you couldnt message people privately ehy is there an option there.....

Hey everyone, thanks for the advice it's appreciated....

"

Because some people are open to it, and others aren't.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I take that advice on board....due to not being on this site for long I'm learning as I go here

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Jesus you just cannot win.....if you couldnt message people privately ehy is there an option there.....

Hey everyone, thanks for the advice it's appreciated....

"

So that people within the chosen preferences, age range and type of the profile can message.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

Op what were your expectations when you joined the site?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

What do you mean op.....?

I expected to chat to women and couples from my area who were looking for fun with a genuine guy.

But obviously the amount of guys out way the women and couples which put all guys at a disadvantage....unless you are really smooth in your messages....which sadly I've never been food at.....I'm never crude always polite.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

In this thread, you're the OP.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Op....is that original post....?

As I said earlier I am learning as I go

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"What do you mean op.....?

I expected to chat to women and couples from my area who were looking for fun with a genuine guy.

But obviously the amount of guys out way the women and couples which put all guys at a disadvantage....unless you are really smooth in your messages....which sadly I've never been food at.....I'm never crude always polite."

Op means original poster. If you look next to your name on the posts it say it . Also using the reply+quote button saves your time and helps identify who you're responding to .

You're right sheer weight of numbers means that men will find it more difficult on here. You have a choice, understand that it won't be easy or feel frustrated. If you feel that women only go for bad boys or people who send smooth messages you're wrong, women aren't stupid they see through all that. If you want easy sex you're in the wrong place and having a passive aggressive attitude isn't going to change it.

Can you get to a club or an organised social? Do you feel able to join in tje forums in a positive way to get your personality and profile known? I don't say that will guarantee success but it might give you a little flavour of how fab works and ease you in to it.

Good luck, whatever you decide.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Op....is that original post....?

As I said earlier I am learning as I go"

And that's fine. We all started somewhere

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he riverdeep69Couple
over a year ago

North west ish


"The river deep69.

So should I just come across as a dickhead who don't give a fuck....

I know I'm not entitled.....but I'm a polite guy who treats people with respect...

Maybe that's my downfall "

Why do you have to come across as anything? If you are a nice guy then that should come across in your thoughts, words and deeds. You don't need to put on an act. However men who shout I'm a nice guy seldom are, especially if they can switch the nice guy persona off if they think it will get them laid.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isa2018Couple
over a year ago

East Northamptonshire

Your profile is unappealing fro. Our point of view. You have 1 public photo and your text is basically complaining about how you're a nice guy so why won't anyone have sex with you.

You really need to rethink your whole approach. The profile and the attitude displayed on this post is not at all enticing as you seem to believe that you have a right to reply and meets.

We're not all just here to get a 'share'. We are here to find people we find sexually attractive and want to go further than just chat a d social meet.

As a single guy you are one in a huge pool of others and your profile, attitude and approach have to stand out if you want responses.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ucy. AlCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne


"

We're all here for one reason and I can't seem to get my share of why were here.. .."

Were here for the experience of meeting new frielnds and exploring ideas. Some people are on here for cams or swap pics others just like to perv, so no were not all here to fuck our way through the site.

The fun has to be mutual and all parties have to be able to take something from the meet not just you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What do you mean op.....?

I expected to chat to women and couples from my area who were looking for fun with a genuine guy.

But obviously the amount of guys out way the women and couples which put all guys at a disadvantage....unless you are really smooth in your messages....which sadly I've never been food at.....I'm never crude always polite.

Op means original poster. If you look next to your name on the posts it say it . Also using the reply+quote button saves your time and helps identify who you're responding to .

You're right sheer weight of numbers means that men will find it more difficult on here. You have a choice, understand that it won't be easy or feel frustrated. If you feel that women only go for bad boys or people who send smooth messages you're wrong, women aren't stupid they see through all that. If you want easy sex you're in the wrong place and having a passive aggressive attitude isn't going to change it.

Can you get to a club or an organised social? Do you feel able to join in tje forums in a positive way to get your personality and profile known? I don't say that will guarantee success but it might give you a little flavour of how fab works and ease you in to it.

Good luck, whatever you decide."

Thanks for that, the advice is really appreciated and welcome.

We all started somewhere and I don't see myself as aggressive or anything like that im just trying to be polite...the way I was brought up to be...

It's nice that you have given me the advice you have, thank you

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Your profile is unappealing fro. Our point of view. You have 1 public photo and your text is basically complaining about how you're a nice guy so why won't anyone have sex with you.

You really need to rethink your whole approach. The profile and the attitude displayed on this post is not at all enticing as you seem to believe that you have a right to reply and meets.

We're not all just here to get a 'share'. We are here to find people we find sexually attractive and want to go further than just chat a d social meet.

As a single guy you are one in a huge pool of others and your profile, attitude and approach have to stand out if you want responses."

Thanks for the advice, it really is appreciated....any advice on how to change my profile and make it more appealing.....from your point of view...

Hey if not then it's not an issue just thought I would ask.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isa2018Couple
over a year ago

East Northamptonshire


"Your profile is unappealing fro. Our point of view. You have 1 public photo and your text is basically complaining about how you're a nice guy so why won't anyone have sex with you.

You really need to rethink your whole approach. The profile and the attitude displayed on this post is not at all enticing as you seem to believe that you have a right to reply and meets.

We're not all just here to get a 'share'. We are here to find people we find sexually attractive and want to go further than just chat a d social meet.

As a single guy you are one in a huge pool of others and your profile, attitude and approach have to stand out if you want responses.

Thanks for the advice, it really is appreciated....any advice on how to change my profile and make it more appealing.....from your point of view...

Hey if not then it's not an issue just thought I would ask."

First step is add some more photos. Torso, back, nicely clothed; not a profile full of dick pics but some nice poses and angles. Lose the bemoaning about no takers and do a write up about what you're looking for, what turns you on and what you can offer.

The main thing you need is patience. You're lucky to have had any meets so soon, many guys are on months with very little response. You also need to accept that every single person on this site has the right to say no to you, and that can be by simply no response or, if you are lucky, a polite reply saying you're not for them. This is probably the most important. If you can't accept this then you are in the wrong place as you will get so many more rejections than invites.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Your profile is unappealing fro. Our point of view. You have 1 public photo and your text is basically complaining about how you're a nice guy so why won't anyone have sex with you.

You really need to rethink your whole approach. The profile and the attitude displayed on this post is not at all enticing as you seem to believe that you have a right to reply and meets.

We're not all just here to get a 'share'. We are here to find people we find sexually attractive and want to go further than just chat a d social meet.

As a single guy you are one in a huge pool of others and your profile, attitude and approach have to stand out if you want responses.

Thanks for the advice, it really is appreciated....any advice on how to change my profile and make it more appealing.....from your point of view...

Hey if not then it's not an issue just thought I would ask.

First step is add some more photos. Torso, back, nicely clothed; not a profile full of dick pics but some nice poses and angles. Lose the bemoaning about no takers and do a write up about what you're looking for, what turns you on and what you can offer.

The main thing you need is patience. You're lucky to have had any meets so soon, many guys are on months with very little response. You also need to accept that every single person on this site has the right to say no to you, and that can be by simply no response or, if you are lucky, a polite reply saying you're not for them. This is probably the most important. If you can't accept this then you are in the wrong place as you will get so many more rejections than invites."

Thanks, I can see where you are coming from and will happily take that advice on board, see if it helps. I understand people will reject you but unless I have advice like you have given me I will never get anywhere.

I will look to improve my profile over the next few days and see if that makes my replies better...

Thank you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I see you've changed your profile slightly.

One niggle, take the 'decent bit in bed' out, every sex is different, someone's decent might be mediocre to the other person. It sounds a bit boastful and that's not appealing to 'decent' women

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I see you've changed your profile slightly.

One niggle, take the 'decent bit in bed' out, every sex is different, someone's decent might be mediocre to the other person. It sounds a bit boastful and that's not appealing to 'decent' women"

Thanks for that....I will do....I am aiming to add more pics to the profile and change it up abit by Wednesday at the latest.

Please feel free to give your opinion as that matters to me as it would allow me to show women and couples more of my character....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Look at the guys who've verified women. Look for the more positive friendly profiles. Don't copy them, but use their sort of attitude.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isa2018Couple
over a year ago

East Northamptonshire


"I see you've changed your profile slightly.

One niggle, take the 'decent bit in bed' out, every sex is different, someone's decent might be mediocre to the other person. It sounds a bit boastful and that's not appealing to 'decent' women"

Just looked at the slight change youn made and agree totally with this. As well as being a little boastful it also sounds as if you are implying that others aren't.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Look at the guys who've verified women. Look for the more positive friendly profiles. Don't copy them, but use their sort of attitude. "

Thanks, I will do.....it is appreciated.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Im learning as I go...making changes all the time....all the advice is really appreciated and welcome

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/02/19 21:58:51]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You say we are all after the same thing.....

Most couples and single females are not here for the same reason as you. They like the social side, talking to friends, getting/giving

advice, cams, reviews, getting their photos fabbed etc. The list is endless and different wjth everyone. They may also keep an eye out for a single guy.... if he catches their eye.

Go to socials and clubs to increase your chances, especially if you are not great at messages.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Considering it takes most single guys over six months to get their first meet, if I were you, I'd be considering myself rather successful rather than moaning about things - as that will put people off

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Hi there everyone. I've been on this site for a few weeks now and only been in a serious conversation about a chat with a couple of people....out of those I have met 1.

Now I'm polite, genuine, gentleman with women or couples when I send messages but I never ever get any replies....and it is quite honestly pissing me off that is why I've recently updated my profile...

Any help in how the best way to go around sorting out meets would be really appreciated....

We're all here for one reason and I can't seem to get my share of why were here.. .."

1) starting this thread will go against you, it’s whinging and entitled - you want your ‘share’ of what’s here! That ain’t what a gentleman says.

2) words like genuine and gentlemen are over used on here and how do I know you are genuine?

3) profile name is all wrong.

4) profile pic looks like you’ve been sat watching some tacky Saturday night quiz show. Get spruced up looking dapper.

5) your profile needs work. It’s not outstanding.

6) there are successful single males on here so maybe chat with them and get advice.

7) go to clubs, get yourself out there.

8) stop moaning on the forums as it’s unattractive.

Good luck.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

We are all here for sex but, surprise women in particular are looking to fulfill their own wants and desires.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"We are all here for sex but, surprise women in particular are looking to fulfill their own wants and desires.

"

Plus we have the power of choice here....so many entitled men lol.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oupleNeedPlus1Couple
over a year ago

Reading


"We are all here for sex but, surprise women in particular are looking to fulfill their own wants and desires.

Plus we have the power of choice here....so many entitled men lol. "

All the above plus this.

And let's remember we also have to be attracted to you physically... If we are not, then that's life. The best profile text and message in the world won't change that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"We are all here for sex but, surprise women in particular are looking to fulfill their own wants and desires.

"

A lot of guys forget this and assume I'm here for them not myself.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We are all here for sex but, surprise women in particular are looking to fulfill their own wants and desires.

A lot of guys forget this and assume I'm here for them not myself. "

Make that MOST guys! Its a sad fact they actualy do.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *uliaChrisCouple
over a year ago

westerham

In the nicest possible way OP, you come across as slightly unhinged.

And your pictures are a bit scary as well..... try a pic standing in a suit.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top