FabSwingers.com forum: GUIDE FOR SINGLE GUYS

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I have learned much during my time in the lifestyle and wish to share it with my fellow single guys in hopes the site can become less stressful and frustrating for everyone. This is primarily aimed at the single guys that don't seem to understand the nature of the site as I know there are plenty on here that are great people!

Huge, well structured, wall of text incoming so prepare yourself!

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GUIDE FOR SINGLE GUYS

by Mr O.

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What’s the matter Billy? Getting ignored 'constantly' and getting down because of it? Thought this site was an easy way to get sex on demand with as many women as you want? Well unfortunately here is a nice reality check:

Imagine you saw a diamond sinking in a bog filled with faecal matter and urine. The diamond is worth LOTS of money and you definitely want to get it but have issues with the faecal matter and urine surrounding it. This is what women and couples on here have to deal with on a daily basis. They receive an absolute SEA OF SHIT in their inbox with the odd diamond that sometimes they miss due to it being absorbed in the sea. Please memorise the following points:

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1) YOU ARE THE MAJORITY ON HERE AND HAVE NO POWER

That means that you are the least desirable entity on the site. The BOTTOM of the food chain. You have to REALLY stand out from the crowd to get any sort of attention.

Go right now and search for men looking for women against women looking for men. Do not be surprised at the head count difference. Infact it is MORE then likely you will get a nice round '600' result for men seeking women. This is not the actual figure. This is the LIMIT to search results. I have no idea how far beyond 600 the actual numbers are but at a guess I would say 900+.

Couples and single ladies hold the power here. It's a simple fact. You should be thankful they even allow you to sign up here as a single male. If you can't stand this fact go back to the nightclub scene as the ratio is probably more balanced there!

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2) THIS IS, FOR THE MOST PART, A MATURE ADULT SITE

What that means is that most people on here do NOT respond to 'wanna f**k tonight luv?'. I should imagine that there ARE a few people here for purely endless multiple partners but I believe they generally get spammed to hell and back by mails, if you want to play sex lottery then go ahead.

You will find your experience here MUCH more enjoyable if you treat it as a social facility to meet interesting and mature people with the POSSIBILITY (NOT CERTAINTY) of having a play together at some point. As mentioned in point #1 if you are just looking for a shag you will probably have much more luck at a night club.

Most people are here to make friends and generally enjoy intimacy as sober as possible. Not get rat arsed and shag anything that moves. If enjoying the social company of one or more mature adults followed by getting intimate with them while mostly sober intimidates you then you may wish to return to the nightclub scene.

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3) SORT YOUR PROFILE OUT

Your profile defines who you are and what you are looking for. Get photo verified for god sake it's not bloody well hard! Do NOT upload a damn cockshot picture and set it as your primary and only image. So many single men do this... WHY? Do you think the women won't believe you’re a man or something? Get some damn tasteful body pictures up instead.

As for the text part- clearly define your availability, how far you can travel, when/if you can accommodate and anything else you feel that might make you unique and stand out. In other words JUST BE YOURSELF. If you are not yourself you will just find when you do meet up that you are very uncomfortable.

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4) THINK WITH YOUR BRAIN INSTEAD OF YOUR PENIS

This is a proper pro tip that I would highly recommend any of the younger single guys, in some cases the older ones! Rub one out to your favourite porno BEFORE contacting anyone on here. You will find that you will engage your brain rather than your penis when writing the mail and you will often find you’re really not interested in the couple or women that seemed so appealing an hour earlier due to their sexy pictures saving both you and them time and energy.

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5) FIRST CONTACT

The vast majority of the time YOU will have to do the chasing, with a nice profile you will occasionally get chased but it's rare. BEFORE YOU MAKE FIRST CONTACT READ THEIR FREAKING PROFILE IN FULL. If it specifies near the bottom age 30-45 and you are 29 for example then DO NOT contact them unless their profile states otherwise.

If you meet their requirements fully and send a first contact email MAKE IT FREAKING WELL POLITE AND WELL MANNERED. DO NOT put 'nice profile lets f**k' or anything that is classed as a 'one liner'. Set the subject as something like 'Pleased to meet you' and then the email structured in the same way you would write a business email. Express your interest in a few polite paragraphs and leave it at that. These are real people at the other end of the email not some random blow up dolls with internet access ffs!

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6) STOP CRYING IF YOU DONT GET A RESPONSE

I have seen this so much. If there is no response to their first contact email certain single men seem to get pissed off and start sending arrogant or bitchy emails. DO NOT DO THIS.

They did not respond because of two reasons: 1- they are not interested, no need to dig deep into the reasons but they simply were not right for you so just move on. or 2- they were planning to reply but had to check through 20+ other emails and forgot. You can thank your fellow single guys for point number 2.

If you really can't stand seeing 'read' then get nothing for weeks or 'deleted' without a response then simple fix: DELETE THE EMAIL IN SENT ITEMS INSTANTLY AFTER YOU SEND IT. Then forget about the person you sent it to until they choose to contact you.

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7) STOP CRYING IF YOU DO GET A POLITE NO THANK YOU RESPONSE

Christ guys if someone says 'thanks but you are too young' or 'thanks but you are not what we/I am looking for' just ACCEPT IT AND MOVE ON. IT IS NOT A PERSONAL ATTACK ON YOU UNLESS YOU MAKE IT ONE. You will never meet that person in real life and they had the decency to tell you where they stand with you so have the decency to NOT REPLY ANYMORE. Save your time and theirs and move the f**k on.

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8) STOP BEING PUSHY

This is a tricky one to describe but it is things like 'we should meet so I can do X on you' and 'I am free tonight lets meet' type things in emails every other line. I have experienced this first hand and it makes me feel uncomfortable so I should imagine it feels the same for couples and women.

THEY KNOW YOU WANT TO EVENTUALLY PLAY WITH THEM SO STOP BEGGING. Just let the emails and other chats flow naturally instead of enforcing that you should all meet ASAP. If they want to meet THEY WILL LET YOU KNOW.

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9) HONESTY

This is my little pet peeve so forgive me! As I am openly Bi (on the site at least!) I do get emails from many single guys from time to time that have 'straight' on their profile and when questioned they either stop responding or claim it’s so they can get 'more responses' from couples and women. For the love of god change it. If you WANT to have an encounter with a man sometime it means you are Bi-Curious. If you have HAD an experience with a man sometime and enjoyed it, it means you are bisexual, if you didn't enjoy it then straight is fine AND NO YOU ARE NOT GAY FOR TRYING. Please set your account as appropriate and just maybe people will become more accepting of male bisexuality.

Also be honest in your emails and profile. Don't claim to be someone or something you are not or you will end up associating with people that you are NOT comfortable with. If you are bi or curious and don't want single guys to chase you that's fine. Just block them all using the filter. You can still contact them if one takes your fancy.

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10) TURN UP FFS IF A TIME AND DATE HAS BEEN SET

The fabled 'timewaster' syndrome. Yes you were accepted to meet up with a woman or a couple, HAVE THE DECENCY TO SHOW UP. If you are not comfortable with getting intimate with them when the time comes JUST SAY NO THANKS. IT'S THAT SIMPLE. Not showing up leads to everyone getting pissed off whose time has been wasted. I can only assume that some single men don't turn up because they can't handle an adult conversation without the fuel of alcohol helping them out.

Man the f**k up and just meet the person or couple. They will NOT bite you or attack you or anything, you will find they will generally be polite, well mannered and make you feel comfortable. If you don't know what to say just talk to them like you would a work colleague, it's really not that hard. If you are nervous don't worry they/she will understand if they are/she is mature. They have been in your position at some point.

Naturally if they are arseholes in person just walk away and find someone else. If you are not comfortable with meeting strangers without the power of alcohol then I would suggest you go back to nightclubs.

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11) NO MEANS NO

I feel this one is relevant so thought I would include it. This is a golden rule in the lifestyle and as a single guy you are allowed to use it as well. If you are really uncomfortable just say 'no thanks' or 'sorry I’m too uncomfortable to do this'. It does NOT make you less of a man. If they point and laugh at you, or humiliate you, for saying such a thing then you deserve better. Leave immediately and block them without second thought. They are too immature.

Naturally if they say 'no' then you better back the f**k down and accept it. If they demand condoms you put a damn condom on. On the flip side if they demand bareback and you are not comfortable with that then walk away. Take control of yourself and always follow the golden rule.

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I apologise if most of this sounds harsh but hopefully it will enlighten some people and make the experience here more pleasant for everyone, even if just a little. I should imagine some of the above can apply to some couples and single ladies at times but mostly it all applies to single guys!

Feel free to add more points below or correct me if you feel some points are incorrect!

I should imagine the target audience for most of this won't even read it, oh well!

Mr O.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Very, very good advice. Can't fault it.

But now you've just enhanced their chances and harmed ours you idiot!!

Seriously, any single guy looking to make headway here, patience and honesty will always win through.

(and before you ask, the cock shot as my main pic was done today as i was dared to by a certain lady - interestingly guys, this was a lady who has "not looking for single men" on her profile, but who chats away to me and would happily meet if we didnt live so far apart - thus proving the point that the gals can spot the good 'uns from the bad 'uns...)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wow ,,, i bet u got a A * in english ,,, well written that man ,,, hats off to ya ,,, and excellent advice to everyone on here ,,, well done

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Fantastic stuff Mr O

Thank you for taking the time to write all of that it must have taken ages

If you have the right mind set regarding swinging its not really rocket science is it?

The successful guys do well for a reason and lots of those are mentioned on your post

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"Very, very good advice. Can't fault it.

But now you've just enhanced their chances and harmed ours you idiot!!

Seriously, any single guy looking to make headway here, patience and honesty will always win through.

You chat to some strange people

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By *he WabbitsCouple
over a year ago

Bromsgrove

Nice one mate, common sense and well put.

Let's hope its read digested and used, thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

very good advice

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By *imnher2Woman
over a year ago

watford

lets hope all reads this post and takes notes. well done

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have just read the whole of this thread and have to say I met a single guy who was very nervous with me. Asked him if he was ok and chatted with him for twenty mintues before we went off anywhere. We had such a good laugh together. He asked me to meet up again so he got over his nervousness. So it goes to show that being poilet and honesty does help in any situation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A very well written post, clear concise and accurate.

The later comment is correct, though, we will now have more competition!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well written and very topical especially in light of some of the forum threads of late xxx

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By *eavensg84uCouple
over a year ago

Harrow

Its all very good advice. I worry though that many single guys wont read it - lets face it, many dont read short profiles before they start their one-handed typing.

Ours says that we dont meet single guys unless black, and we dont want winks and friends requests without chatting first. I dont need to say how many winks we get from single white guys!

When I query it (politely), I get a response along the lines of 'well, I thought I might have a chance'.

So I'd ad 'Be realistic' into your list - realistic about what the profile says, and realistic about what it means.If the profile says that the woman or couple cant accommodate, only reply if you can sort accommodation out; if you can accommodate but they live in London and you're in Glasgow, dont bother; and work on the same unspoken principle that applies when you try to pick someone up in a club or bar - if you are a 6/10 in looks, dont expect to pull the 10/10 woman at the bar - be honest about yourself and dont try to play in a higher divison!

And good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You chat to some strange people

And you do lol xx

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By *imfromGlasgowMan
over a year ago

er...guess

"............if you are a 6/10 in looks, dont expect to pull the 10/10 woman at the bar - be honest about yourself and dont try to play in a higher divison!

................."

I can't agree about that. Women, thankfully, see different things in men from what men see in women and the 10/10 woman at the bar is often grateful for the chance to chat to someone who can string three words together or who manages to avoid staring at her tits for the duration of the exchange.

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

Love it, love it, LOVE IT!!! Thank you Mr O

Its not too late in life to learn I say (some females and couples can do with a few lessons also though!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks lots for this!! I'm totally new to the scene and i found it enlightening, particularly the first point.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes - thanks Mr O. I've already told a few to read your thread!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hello

Well thank you for setting some 'rules'

Every day all i seam to get is, hey fancy a f*ck???

I understand that im here to have fun on this site, but i want to enjoy the filrting that it comes with too.

I agree strongly about the part where you mention about not using condoms. If i say use one, i mean USE ONE.

Guys have to remember that they can be over powering, and quite forceful!

So please respect our decision!!

Yeah i dont understand men who put a profile picture of their manhood. The first thing that we will see is their face, not their dicks!!

A message to everyone, READ PROFILES!! i agree very strongly to that!

I praise you for writing this thread, i will pass this on to every one who doesnt obey!!

Lisa xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you, thank you! I wish there was a way that your post could be compulsory reading for the majority of single men on here!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please can I copy and paste this? Will save me a lot of typing!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Please can I copy and paste this? Will save me a lot of typing!!!

By all means

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Read this earlier and though it was brilliant. Decided to take off the single guy block and see what happened......

We put this in our profile near the bottom

"We're happy to be contacted by single guys, but please no one liners and/or cock shots...........

For a single guy the best way to succeed with Kirsty is to flirt and

chat not the "fancy a f**k" approach........

Also please don't just send us a wink or a friend request - if you think we're possibly compatible, why not just send us a brief message?

So far this evening we've had 3 one liners, one cock shot, two winks and a friend request from single guys!!!

We're going to persevere cause the first guy to answer ticked all the boxes and we're sure there are more out there

But please guys - read the profile!!

Kirsty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

thats the best guide ever written every new member joinin should get made read that whether they are male or female. have found the majority of single guys join and expect the first female they come across excuse the pun to be overjoyed to meet them after a one liner!! the swinging lifestyle isnt about random lots of different meets n a few iv said that to have got abusive.then wonder why they not gettin meets! well done in the post x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And single guys need to understand that there is a big chance they won't get to meet anyone at all no matter what they do and no matter how strictly they follow the above guide. It's something to take into account to avoid major disappointment later. Though never say never i guess!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi everyone, brillaint advice for me as I am new to this. It is hard to strike the right ballance of politeness and not sounding too boring though...

I'll stick to the advice and hope it lets me meet some great people.

Thanks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

SPOT ON! absolutely amazing straight to the point no bull advice.

Take this on board and you won't go far wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can i add, and this probably doesnt apply to just single fellas.... Please dont put on ancient pics, or exagerate your height or put athletic when you have man boobs and a belly. Just be honest , because its not fun for anyone when you turn up looking like a different guy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wow mr0 well put m8 thanx for that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A 21 yr old male just messaged me and i quote'' fancy afuk toynt bbe?'' I couldnt bloody read it let alone anything else! That is NOT the way to get a lady interested!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A 21 yr old male just messaged me and i quote'' fancy afuk toynt bbe?'' I couldnt bloody read it let alone anything else! That is NOT the way to get a lady interested! "

so you going to meet him then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A 21 yr old male just messaged me and i quote'' fancy afuk toynt bbe?'' I couldnt bloody read it let alone anything else! That is NOT the way to get a lady interested! "

PMSL

I find the majority of single guys who message crude one-liners are quite young, and I wish there is a filter that allows a certain age group to be blocked, as per individual's preference

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All good stuff.

I suppose if single male can pull in real life he will be able to do ok in this lifestyle. The crap messages etc are from guys who dont know how to pull women

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By *ild_oatsMan
over a year ago

the land of saints & sinners

I know its been said before but Mr O you have created a very well written post.

I would have to agree with everthing that is written and that polieness and manners are paramount.

As a single bi man myself I too get one liner messages from guys. Though probably not the same number as single women or couples. Oftern their profile says they are straight. They are obviously not as why would you contact me.

I may be a single guy but I do prefer a well witten message than "I'm free tonight do you fancy a f**k" etc.... If I am going to have sex you even if it's on a one off basis I much prefer to know you a bit better than that. However that does not mean I want to know your life story.

Top marks MR O

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey people!

I am a straight single guy, who's been on here a while and I don't have the "Cock Shot", I don't send crude one liners in "text speak"!

What I do get is mail from Gay/Bi guys telling me what they would like to do with me and I reply politely saying no thanks, not my thing.

But I shall percivere and through this perciverance I will overcome the traversty, that is being a single guy on a swinging site!!

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By *lphamaleMan
over a year ago

sheffield

Mr O

well written and good advice, enough said.

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By *hundercats69Couple
over a year ago

CT14

for us, the first and main thing we notice is that a huge amount of single guys appear to be more than able to look at our pictures but are unable to read the words that make up our profile... we have become so annoyed with this that we now message them back advising them that these skills are best applied to reading comic books.. in private we think they are total twats...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/09/09 23:11:48]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Excellent post,it's a shame it can't be a permanent fixture at the beginning of the Introduction Forum.

It's far too useful to allow it to disappear.

XXXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have been on here for a while now. Have read this post though and found it enlightening,

Have now amended my profile accordingly and i hope as transparently and honestly as possible. If anyone wants to have a look and tell me if i've gone wrong anywhere please feel free to do so.

Mr O... thanks, you're a gent and a scholar

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By *eznhannahCouple
over a year ago

leeds

agree with all the above we have times when we do look for single guys and times we dont (before you all rush off to check we are not looking at the mo) but if a single guy messages us when we have no single guys written on our profile we instantly block him, our biggest biggest annoyance tho is the reply written purely to the female, "hi hannah you are beautiful we could do this and that together" etc couples will know what i mean, please write your replys to the couple on your first message notjust the girl, very well written guide tho, well done you x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hy Guys, Being polite and well mannered, is good advice in any situation, as is being honest or some one will end up with some thing they don't want.

Profile are difficult because some are not filled in correctly ,in perticular the age range. and interests.

So it always pays to read the p

e in full, common sense realy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi all, I always read a profile fully first before sending a message, if I dont fit it 100% I do not message them it's that easy and the courteous thing to do, I always send a nice introduction with a picture and will only add interests if asked for in the profile, the other thing is I do not send any lies or misleading informatiom because you will get caught out and there are lots of friends on here who chat, I meet a lady from the site who wants total privacy, her profile gives almost nothing away and that's how she wants it, you have to respect other people wishes and boundries otherwise you will get lost in the site and remain unnoticed,

Kev.

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By *aughtyinguMan
over a year ago

swindon

how long should a guy wait, or how many messages, before asking to meet ?

Im riding out a membership on another adult dating site, where the seemingly the vast majority of users there are timewasters :\, i met 3 women from that site (in 6months) one of those was the nice lady who told me about here

, we had a couple of nice hugs and that was it :$

irony is that the other two ladies where a virgin, and a grandma :o

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By *AR1987Man
over a year ago

Sevenoaks

Kudos to you Mr. O for having the time to write it out. What is a shame is that it is mostly common sense. It's so obvious. No-one in their right mind would listen to a one liner. It's a bit like cheesy chat up lines in a nightclub.

Having said that, and I know I should man up, it is ever so slightly de-moralising to see a (in my mind) well written message deleted without response. If they could just say, sorry, not interested, then it would be better, but beggars can't be choosers, when the recipient probably has about 5 million messages to look through!

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By *enuineTykeMan
over a year ago

Cleckheaton

Well Mr O, brilliantly written if I may say so, and it’s a pity singles can’t be made to read this as part of the signing on process. In other words it keeps repeating until fully read.

Michael

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By *umpingJackFlashMan
over a year ago

Somewhere near you?

Mr O. Well written, humourous and all good advice. But a little aside to all the people who hate winks, If I wink it means I like your profile and am interested, but I use a wink so you can check me out and mabey wink back or get in touch. Its less intrusive than a long letter of introduction, I am sure we have all been winked at in a club or pub, and if we like what we see, we introduce ourselves. Same here online.

Just my tupence worth!

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By *umpingJackFlashMan
over a year ago

Somewhere near you?

Ps. Admin should make this a sticky in the help/advice forum.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

bump

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By *hris01Man
over a year ago

crewe

Just read this and all sounds very good advice, but think you left some advice out. That is for cpls who think because we are single lads they can be rude and say anything they want, dont forget there are many types of cpls on here and if your rude , you get a bad name

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By *ossiequickMan
over a year ago

west hull

Spot on... I always put good messgages togther that are about the person, i get few responses but like Mr O said they have a sea of sh!t to sift through. One more thing, single guys dont pretend to be women or a couple its really sad and all it does is annoy people and stop other decent single guys meeting some awesome people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd like to thank Mr O for this guide, rather nice of him to provide such tips.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Huge, well structured, wall of text incoming so prepare yourself!

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GUIDE FOR SINGLE GUYS

by Mr O.

=================-------------------------------

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1) YOU ARE THE MAJORITY ON HERE AND HAVE NO POWER

That means that you are the least desirable entity on the site. The BOTTOM of the food chain. You have to REALLY stand out from the crowd to get any sort of attention.

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2) THIS IS, FOR THE MOST PART, A MATURE ADULT SITE

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3) SORT YOUR PROFILE OUT

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4) THINK WITH YOUR BRAIN INSTEAD OF YOUR PENIS

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5) FIRST CONTACT

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6) STOP CRYING IF YOU DONT GET A RESPONSE

I have seen this so much. If there is no response to their first contact email certain single men seem to get pissed off and start sending arrogant or bitchy emails. DO NOT DO THIS.

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7) STOP CRYING IF YOU DO GET A POLITE NO THANK YOU RESPONSE

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8) STOP BEING PUSHY

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9) HONESTY

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10) TURN UP FFS IF A TIME AND DATE HAS BEEN SET

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11) NO MEANS NO

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Feel free to add more points below or correct me if you feel some points are incorrect!

I should imagine the target audience for most of this won't even read it, oh well!

Mr O.

great thread m8 hope it works but you are dealing with people who dont understand NO SINGLE MALES written at the top of a profile

but good luck with it and we just wish they were all as adult as you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

read and understood cap'n.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

While I agree whole-heartedly with the original article, something has me curious.

It appears unanimoius that putting up a cock pic as a profile picture is frowned upon, but it appears to be OK for ladies to put up boob and pussy shots as their main picture with no comeback. As the original writer says, with them lies the power and this is one opportunity for women to get us back for our many 'double standard' practices.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

bump

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very good advise and some very good comments by other members now I can understand why there is so much hostilitytowards single guys I hope all single men including myself will benifit from it and enjoy the site and find the lifestyle more pleasurable.

Thank you MR O

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ive read it mate and its sound advice. i get asked off friends whats swinging like to which i always reply its probably nothing like what ur imagining it to be like, but if any of em want my advice about using the net to start swinging i will tell them to read ur advice on fabswingers n dont ask again lol

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By *Pebble-Woman
over a year ago

Nottingham

thankyou for a well thought out thread

i refere many 'cavemen' to this thread in the hopes they might actually learn

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By *imfromGlasgowMan
over a year ago

er...guess

"..............

i refere many 'cavemen' to this thread in the hopes they might actually learn

xx"

I wish I shared your optimism. Cavemen don't learn. Real men just 'know' how to behave - I doubt it can be taught to anyone over the age of about 7.

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By *enderbycoupleCouple
over a year ago

derbyshire or localish

great advice,,will they take any notice,,probably not,but hey we live in hope,thanks for posting.xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Brilliant but incorrect in a lot of areas.

Single guys you are not the majority looking on here, you are the minority.

You don't have less chance of getting a meet you have more chance.

Why do I think that ? I have been here a long time as a couple and a long time as a single.

As a single male I got far more invites than we do as a couple.

Yes the number of single males searching for meets far outweighs the number of couples and single females, but look at it for a moment, as the very informed OP says himself, decent single males are few and far between. eliminate the dreamers, no hopers and downright rude individuals and the remaining number of single males are very much in the minority.

Do what the OP says, follow his advice and get out of the no-chance file and into the minority file.

Sort out your profile, put some decent body pics in, inform people of what they need to know to choose you, send witty, informative respectfull mails to people.

Most of all READ the profiles of those you like the look of and respect thier wishes.

When putting your profile together put your mind into the head of the people you want to meet, think about what you would like to know about a guy before selecting him, show them that you are respectfull, make references to thier profile so they know you took the time to read it.

Decent single males as any couple searching for them will tell you are not numerous and easy to find so for the few that make the effort the rewards are great.

The OP of this post got 99.9% of it right, listen to him.

Who Dares Wins - Who Doesn't Wanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh and remember ...... couples looking for couples only - thats not easy, he has to like him and her, she has to like her and him, him and her have to like her and him, in other words finding 4 people who are compatible is not easy.

Me I am straight but I still have to like and get along with the guy who is going to be playing with my partner. Sasha will play with both of them so has to find them both sexually attractive.

Often I like the female of a couple but Sasha doesn't like the guy or vice versa etc.

When couples are seeking single guys you generally find that it's the female who has to find the guy sexually attractive and the male just has to find him respectfull and "matey" slightly different with bi-couples of course.

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By *uckoldandWifeCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

this is a really good beginners guide for everyone, great work and even if only one or two guys read it and take on board the advice it was worth Mr O writing it, Thanks, now we have somewhere to send a guy for information when he gets shirty..lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"this is a really good beginners guide for everyone, great work and even if only one or two guys read it and take on board the advice it was worth Mr O writing it, Thanks, now we have somewhere to send a guy for information when he gets shirty..lol

"
and when he gets back from there if there is no change in his attitude theres always that place in the midlands that people get sent to have a few words to themself.... coventry lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great couple of posts from JednSasha.

Spot on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have learned much during my time in the lifestyle and wish to share it with my fellow single guys in hopes the site can become less stressful and frustrating for everyone. This is primarily aimed at the single guys that don't seem to understand the nature of the site as I know there are plenty on here that are great people!must admit the advice is spot on except no4. because we both know as red bloodied males that having the urge to rub one out is what spurs us on to find a female wether its for love or lust and i know im not alone in saying once you have rubbed one out (not heard that one n its funny lol)the urge to seek out a member of the opposite sex seems to diminish... very quickly lol so i just dont see too many guys following that tiny bit of ur excellent thread but know exactly where ur at and agree totally that it would dramatically decrease the amount of unwanted messages and would be good for all except for cpls who are looking for single guys lol

Huge, well structured, wall of text incoming so prepare yourself!

=================-------------------------------

GUIDE FOR SINGLE GUYS

by Mr O.

=================-------------------------------

-----

1) YOU ARE THE MAJORITY ON HERE AND HAVE NO POWER

That means that you are the least desirable entity on the site. The BOTTOM of the food chain. You have to REALLY stand out from the crowd to get any sort of attention.

-----

2) THIS IS, FOR THE MOST PART, A MATURE ADULT SITE

-----

3) SORT YOUR PROFILE OUT

-----

4) THINK WITH YOUR BRAIN INSTEAD OF YOUR PENIS

-----

5) FIRST CONTACT

-----

6) STOP CRYING IF YOU DONT GET A RESPONSE

I have seen this so much. If there is no response to their first contact email certain single men seem to get pissed off and start sending arrogant or bitchy emails. DO NOT DO THIS.

-----

7) STOP CRYING IF YOU DO GET A POLITE NO THANK YOU RESPONSE

-----

8) STOP BEING PUSHY

-----

9) HONESTY

-----

10) TURN UP FFS IF A TIME AND DATE HAS BEEN SET

-----

11) NO MEANS NO

--------------------------------

Feel free to add more points below or correct me if you feel some points are incorrect!

I should imagine the target audience for most of this won't even read it, oh well!

Mr O.

great thread m8 hope it works but you are dealing with people who dont understand NO SINGLE MALES written at the top of a profile

but good luck with it and we just wish they were all as adult as you

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

Quit bumping this, we don't want everyone knowing...;-)

(yes I know I'm re-bumping it)

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By *ishful.thinkingWoman
over a year ago

east london

Think it should be bumped first thing each morning to keep it to the fore - should be easily available to all new to the site incluging us single girls. Keep pointing people in its direction and get a nice thanks back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think it should be bumped first thing each morning to keep it to the fore - should be easily available to all new to the site incluging us single girls. Keep pointing people in its direction and get a nice thanks back

Think reading this should be a compusary part of getting membership to the site....as everyone including couples and single girls can take something useful away from this post...nice one...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Id have thought this was all common sense, but then it obviously cant be that common, lol

Huge, well structured, wall of text incoming so prepare yourself!

=================-------------------------------

GUIDE FOR SINGLE GUYS

by Mr O.

=================-------------------------------

-----

1) YOU ARE THE MAJORITY ON HERE AND HAVE NO POWER

That means that you are the least desirable entity on the site. The BOTTOM of the food chain. You have to REALLY stand out from the crowd to get any sort of attention.

-----

2) THIS IS, FOR THE MOST PART, A MATURE ADULT SITE

-----

3) SORT YOUR PROFILE OUT

-----

4) THINK WITH YOUR BRAIN INSTEAD OF YOUR PENIS

-----

5) FIRST CONTACT

-----

6) STOP CRYING IF YOU DONT GET A RESPONSE

I have seen this so much. If there is no response to their first contact email certain single men seem to get pissed off and start sending arrogant or bitchy emails. DO NOT DO THIS.

-----

7) STOP CRYING IF YOU DO GET A POLITE NO THANK YOU RESPONSE

-----

8) STOP BEING PUSHY

-----

9) HONESTY

-----

10) TURN UP FFS IF A TIME AND DATE HAS BEEN SET

-----

11) NO MEANS NO

--------------------------------

Feel free to add more points below or correct me if you feel some points are incorrect!

I should imagine the target audience for most of this won't even read it, oh well!

Mr O.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mr O

copy n paste this on a new thread, its way to long now and full of to many quotes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank God!! for a few single men who know how to be polite , and honest , and thanks to mr 0 , for showing what most single men sld be doing , xxx L

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank God!! for a few single men who know how to be polite , and honest , and thanks to mr 0 , for showing what most single men sld be doing , xxx L

Nah, personally i think he is a bar steward,, lol (joke). Can you imagine how fewer meets we polite and intelligent single guys would get if ALL the guys did it.

mmmm, too much competition, i say,, lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*Bump* - Some sound advice here. Bumping the thread so it can get circulated again. This is something worth Pinning

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

"*Bump* - Some sound advice here. Bumping the thread so it can get circulated again. This is something worth Pinning "

Good point - we often say some things would benefit from a pinning feature here - and single guys advice is particularly helpful to you all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Superb post, intelligently written and everything digested. Thank you very much

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By *heIcebreakersCouple
over a year ago

Cramlington

Huge, well structured, wall of text incoming so prepare yourself!

=================-------------------------------

GUIDE FOR SINGLE GUYS

by Mr O.

=================-------------------------------

-----

1) YOU ARE THE MAJORITY ON HERE AND HAVE NO POWER

That means that you are the least desirable entity on the site. The BOTTOM of the food chain. You have to REALLY stand out from the crowd to get any sort of attention.

-----

2) THIS IS, FOR THE MOST PART, A MATURE ADULT SITE

-----

3) SORT YOUR PROFILE OUT

-----

4) THINK WITH YOUR BRAIN INSTEAD OF YOUR PENIS

-----

5) FIRST CONTACT

-----

6) STOP CRYING IF YOU DONT GET A RESPONSE

I have seen this so much. If there is no response to their first contact email certain single men seem to get pissed off and start sending arrogant or bitchy emails. DO NOT DO THIS.

-----

7) STOP CRYING IF YOU DO GET A POLITE NO THANK YOU RESPONSE

-----

8) STOP BEING PUSHY

-----

9) HONESTY

-----

10) TURN UP FFS IF A TIME AND DATE HAS BEEN SET

-----

11) NO MEANS NO

--------------------------------

Feel free to add more points below or correct me if you feel some points are incorrect!

I should imagine the target audience for most of this won't even read it, oh well!

Mr O.

bloody hell can we make this compulsory reading ??????

(kaz)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think its something that should be referred to on the introduction section.

I'll keep the forum link to hand to give to people and try recirculate it.

I suppose if someone messages and you could hit them with this.

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By *oi93Man
over a year ago

Aberdeen

Good to see someone is making a point of trying to help others out, very good advice hopefully it reaches the intended audience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a lot of patronising pish

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Interesting to see how many on this thread are now UNLOS, including the OP!

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By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

Some really good advice. I’m not keen on point one though. I’m here to meet single men, they’re not the bottom of the food chain to me and I’m not the only one. They shouldn’t feel grateful to be allowed to be here. I get what he’s trying to convey but that one point almost seems to contradicts the last, very good, point.

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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago

Wherever the party is!

"Interesting to see how many on this thread are now UNLOS, including the OP!"

Right. I'd personally rather take tips from someone who's "still in the game".

I think the best advice (which is applicable to most things in life) is to "watch and learn". I always maintain that things never really took off for me until I set foot in my first club. Then I pretty much made a bee line for one of the oldest guys in the place who proceeded to regale myself and a small crowd with tales of swinging in days gone by. He was also good friends with the club owners which was a lucky break!

Then it's just a case of trying not to act like a fool and building your reputation. Basically!

I could actually go into lots of detail with hints and tips but it's more of a show rather than tell thing. More fun that way! Bite the bullet, meet me at the bar and I'll tell you EVERYTHING that I've learned so far...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best advice is guys on here obviously don't follow the advice given which means women get pissed off with most of the guys on here and therefore don't meet.

The solution is go to socials, that way you can see what people are like In person.

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By *ordweaver2018Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

This should probably be adopted by the site itself and sent to all new men who sign up! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This should probably be adopted by the site itself and sent to all new men who sign up! Lol"

Most don't read a profile consisting of a few lines,you honestly believe they will read all that,and then adhere to it?

Let them make dicks of themselves,they are easy to ignore,easy to block.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great words of advice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As humans evolved we were developed a good set of skills to mate and reproduce

At no point in the millions of years of human evolution did we develop skills to mate online

Use what you have and go in the real world and leave the chatting online to those that want to do it

And guys

You message 10 women today at 11 am

2 of them will be on monthly

8 of them will be at work

4 of them will be pissed off

3 of them are bored and only checking messages

4 are probably off men

1 is probably hung over

2 feel sick

2 are pregant and Dont know it

1 is probably late and doesn’t know it

Get the picture ??

How do you know a woman’ is receptive to advances , well it’s usually simple, you approach them and use your skills that have evolved over millions of years to see if they are attracted to you . Which you don’t get online

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get the picture ??

Yes,your maths is awful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get the picture ??

Yes,your maths is awful

Send 10 messages at 11.00am and then come back with how many replies you get lol

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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago

Wherever the party is!

"As humans evolved we were developed a good set of skills to mate and reproduce

At no point in the millions of years of human evolution did we develop skills to mate online

Use what you have and go in the real world and leave the chatting online to those that want to do it

And guys

You message 10 women today at 11 am

2 of them will be on monthly

8 of them will be at work

4 of them will be pissed off

3 of them are bored and only checking messages

4 are probably off men

1 is probably hung over

2 feel sick

2 are pregant and Dont know it

1 is probably late and doesn’t know it

Get the picture ??

THIS is better advice than the OP.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *antingpleasureMan
over a year ago

chesterfield

as a single male on here i do read profiles but quite a lot specify non smokers.(even some that smoke themselves)so i dont send a message. infact i have only ever sent a handfull of messages because most state we will find you.. (thats probably like a needle in a haystack judging on how many single males are on here.even those that pretend they are couples).

so the way i look at it now is not to message anyone as couples and females can see you have viewed their profile. if they have a slight interest and view your profile then maybe there is a chance they will message you.(i think if its meant to happen then it will) x

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

Excellent advice ... well I think it is anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well this is over a year old and OP has since left the site but his advice is pretty good and well worth reading.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

Get the picture ??

Yes,your maths is awful

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

It's actually from 2008. I remember Mr O.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wished I'd seen this when I first started on here, oh well. Most is common sense but there are a few points that have enlightened me into this lifestyle better than how I perceived it before. Thanks MrO (even though you're not here any more) and to everyone else who's input I'm going to take on board

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reading this was incredibly informative, and as every one has said it's all down to common sense and remembering that this is a buyers market and single men are in abundance.

All I can say from my own experience as an incredibly average looking guy, is don't be a twat and always expect disappointment.

That been said I am ever the optimist.

Have fun every one and be nice

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Huge, well structured, wall of text incoming so prepare yourself!

=================-------------------------------

GUIDE FOR SINGLE GUYS

by Mr O.

=================-------------------------------

-----

1) YOU ARE THE MAJORITY ON HERE AND HAVE NO POWER

That means that you are the least desirable entity on the site. The BOTTOM of the food chain. You have to REALLY stand out from the crowd to get any sort of attention.

-----

2) THIS IS, FOR THE MOST PART, A MATURE ADULT SITE

-----

3) SORT YOUR PROFILE OUT

-----

4) THINK WITH YOUR BRAIN INSTEAD OF YOUR PENIS

-----

5) FIRST CONTACT

-----

6) STOP CRYING IF YOU DONT GET A RESPONSE

I have seen this so much. If there is no response to their first contact email certain single men seem to get pissed off and start sending arrogant or bitchy emails. DO NOT DO THIS.

-----

7) STOP CRYING IF YOU DO GET A POLITE NO THANK YOU RESPONSE

-----

8) STOP BEING PUSHY

-----

9) HONESTY

-----

10) TURN UP FFS IF A TIME AND DATE HAS BEEN SET

-----

11) NO MEANS NO

--------------------------------

Feel free to add more points below or correct me if you feel some points are incorrect!

I should imagine the target audience for most of this won't even read it, oh well!

Mr O.

Fucking brilliant.

I wish this was adhered to by you guys. Sadly its not.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Reading this was incredibly informative, and as every one has said it's all down to common sense and remembering that this is a buyers market and single men are in abundance.

All I can say from my own experience as an incredibly average looking guy, is don't be a twat and always expect disappointment.

That been said I am ever the optimist.

Have fun every one and be nice

There are some decent people in here after all.

I'd say likewise to about women. Women need to do the same as this.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ebjonnsonMan
over a year ago

Maldon

Huge, well structured, wall of text incoming so prepare yourself!

=================-------------------------------

GUIDE FOR SINGLE GUYS

by Mr O.

=================-------------------------------

-----

1) YOU ARE THE MAJORITY ON HERE AND HAVE NO POWER

That means that you are the least desirable entity on the site. The BOTTOM of the food chain. You have to REALLY stand out from the crowd to get any sort of attention.

-----

2) THIS IS, FOR THE MOST PART, A MATURE ADULT SITE

-----

3) SORT YOUR PROFILE OUT

-----

4) THINK WITH YOUR BRAIN INSTEAD OF YOUR PENIS

-----

5) FIRST CONTACT

-----

6) STOP CRYING IF YOU DONT GET A RESPONSE

I have seen this so much. If there is no response to their first contact email certain single men seem to get pissed off and start sending arrogant or bitchy emails. DO NOT DO THIS.

-----

7) STOP CRYING IF YOU DO GET A POLITE NO THANK YOU RESPONSE

-----

8) STOP BEING PUSHY

-----

9) HONESTY

-----

10) TURN UP FFS IF A TIME AND DATE HAS BEEN SET

-----

11) NO MEANS NO

--------------------------------

Feel free to add more points below or correct me if you feel some points are incorrect!

I should imagine the target audience for most of this won't even read it, oh well!

Mr O.

Fucking brilliant.

I wish this was adhered to by you guys. Sadly its not. "

Blimey! Too long. Look, if we can’t be bothered to read profiles why would we trawl through that lot?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *he CruiserMan
over a year ago

carshalton

Interesting the OP is no longer on the site. Must have gone back to nightclubs lol

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Interesting the OP is no longer on the site. Must have gone back to nightclubs lol"

It's a ten year old thread, most of the threads from that time are mostly from UNLOS accounts.

I can't remember specifically why he left, but I do know that it wasn't for lack of meets.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter

It's funny, as a single bloke on here and only being on the site a couple of months although I've only met (and got on famously) with one person from here, I actually have some really nice interactions on here and am looking forward to meeting a couple of absolute honies from here in 2019. Regular online dating, by comparison, is so dead for me it's unreal. My tip is just be polite, relate to people as humans and don't sweat the few kickbacks you'll get in the beginning whilst refining your opening message strategy...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *reykiwi500Man
over a year ago

West Kent (near Tonbridge)

Huge, well structured, wall of text incoming so prepare yourself!

=================-------------------------------

GUIDE FOR SINGLE GUYS

by Mr O.

=================-------------------------------

-----

1) YOU ARE THE MAJORITY ON HERE AND HAVE NO POWER

That means that you are the least desirable entity on the site. The BOTTOM of the food chain. You have to REALLY stand out from the crowd to get any sort of attention.

-----

2) THIS IS, FOR THE MOST PART, A MATURE ADULT SITE

-----

3) SORT YOUR PROFILE OUT

-----

4) THINK WITH YOUR BRAIN INSTEAD OF YOUR PENIS

-----

5) FIRST CONTACT

-----

6) STOP CRYING IF YOU DONT GET A RESPONSE

I have seen this so much. If there is no response to their first contact email certain single men seem to get pissed off and start sending arrogant or bitchy emails. DO NOT DO THIS.

-----

7) STOP CRYING IF YOU DO GET A POLITE NO THANK YOU RESPONSE

-----

8) STOP BEING PUSHY

-----

9) HONESTY

-----

10) TURN UP FFS IF A TIME AND DATE HAS BEEN SET

-----

11) NO MEANS NO

--------------------------------

Feel free to add more points below or correct me if you feel some points are incorrect!

I should imagine the target audience for most of this won't even read it, oh well!

Mr O.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Huge, well structured, wall of text incoming so prepare yourself!

=================-------------------------------

GUIDE FOR SINGLE GUYS

by Mr O.

=================-------------------------------

-----

1) YOU ARE THE MAJORITY ON HERE AND HAVE NO POWER

That means that you are the least desirable entity on the site. The BOTTOM of the food chain. You have to REALLY stand out from the crowd to get any sort of attention.

-----

2) THIS IS, FOR THE MOST PART, A MATURE ADULT SITE

-----

3) SORT YOUR PROFILE OUT

-----

4) THINK WITH YOUR BRAIN INSTEAD OF YOUR PENIS

-----

5) FIRST CONTACT

-----

6) STOP CRYING IF YOU DONT GET A RESPONSE

I have seen this so much. If there is no response to their first contact email certain single men seem to get pissed off and start sending arrogant or bitchy emails. DO NOT DO THIS.

-----

7) STOP CRYING IF YOU DO GET A POLITE NO THANK YOU RESPONSE

-----

8) STOP BEING PUSHY

-----

9) HONESTY

-----

10) TURN UP FFS IF A TIME AND DATE HAS BEEN SET

-----

11) NO MEANS NO

--------------------------------

Feel free to add more points below or correct me if you feel some points are incorrect!

I should imagine the target audience for most of this won't even read it, oh well!

Mr O.

That's outstanding advice.

I haven't been on here long but get the impression there are a huge number of guys on here who give the rest of us a bad name. I was pretty certain that no one would think "I'm free tonight fancy a f***)" would work, based on what you've said I assume that happens (a lot).

So ladies, what makes a guy stand out to you??

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

Someone who can hold a normal conversation, and who understands that women are attracted to guys who put in more effort than 20 cock pics and will fill in later on their profile. There are guys who have been on here for over a year and still have a 3 word profile , just how long does a profile take to be filled in

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago

Beyond the shadows.

"Someone who can hold a normal conversation, and who understands that women are attracted to guys who put in more effort than 20 cock pics and will fill in later on their profile. There are guys who have been on here for over a year and still have a 3 word profile , just how long does a profile take to be filled in

It takes years

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Makes complete sense.

I've wondered if I was right about thinking that putting cock pics all over the place isn't a great place to be

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

It takes years

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

There must have been more than one Mr.O as the one I shared my fab life with for some time certainly couldn't have written that!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good solid sound advice ill take it

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By *ll 4 herCouple
over a year ago

Bury/Bolton

Very good advice. We were so thinking of saving the link to this to send as a reply, then we realised those we would be sending it to aren't going to read it, the main reason we aren't interested in them is because they failed at point 5 on the list, so there's no hope of them reading that.

In truth point 5 is responsible for nearly every time we have ignored a message, even from those that in every other way match what we look for.

But the other points cover every other reason why we don't reply.

Well said OP, but we fear the knuckle draggers will never take it's lessons on board.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is great advice and one that all single males should read when signing up to fab. Just Perfect

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By *astRider600Man
over a year ago

Brighton

Shame he’s not on the site anymore, was gunna suggest we make him the Fab Ambassador for Single Men! Well said and a must read for new single guys!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Brilliant! Should be sent as a message when a single guy joins!

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By *astRider600Man
over a year ago

Brighton

"Brilliant! Should be sent as a message when a single guy joins! "

Yeah was kinda what I was thinking! Even if it was a pinned post that was basically shoved in their face till they give in and read it aha

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Yes, like a sticky x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All i can say is after following this advice i have now been getting alot more views, fabs and messages thank you mysterious fab super hero

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By *s.FrostWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Thank you so much for this. Well written, just perfect. I'll be directing all the "loose cannons" to this post..

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By *exisfun69Man
over a year ago

Oadby

Good advice and common sense to be polite and courteous. Here's a hi wanna fuck does nut giet you anywhere so I don't get guts that do that. Well written but does not mention that there are actually couples and females that do also arrange meets and not show or cancel at the last minute to wash their hair. Couples have told me some of the worst for doing it are other couples not guys. Yes women a d couples do have the power and most wield it responsibily, but some are just arrogant stuck up prats. There are also plenty of people that say they want to meet a two headed blue Martian only and yet when a two headed blue Martian comes along, ticks all their boxes and sends them a long polite email still gets ignored or told "sorry not what we are looking for"

So the same applies,, there are diamond women and couples out there you have to wade through crap to find also. Just it's not such a large deep pool

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

I switched off at ,, I have learned !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bump

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Good advice and common sense to be polite and courteous. Here's a hi wanna fuck does nut giet you anywhere so I don't get guts that do that. Well written but does not mention that there are actually couples and females that do also arrange meets and not show or cancel at the last minute to wash their hair. Couples have told me some of the worst for doing it are other couples not guys. Yes women a d couples do have the power and most wield it responsibily, but some are just arrogant stuck up prats. There are also plenty of people that say they want to meet a two headed blue Martian only and yet when a two headed blue Martian comes along, ticks all their boxes and sends them a long polite email still gets ignored or told "sorry not what we are looking for"

So the same applies,, there are diamond women and couples out there you have to wade through crap to find also. Just it's not such a large deep pool

Obviously,it wasn't the two headed blue martian they were looking for.

Someone for everyone,not everyone for someone.

Always remember that.

Meeting minimum requirements isn't all requirements for meeting.

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By *abrielle247Couple (FF)
over a year ago

PDI Gran Canaria

Well that was good, but you forgot to mention TS as we are unindated with messages from single guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Very, very good advice. Can't fault it.

But now you've just enhanced their chances and harmed ours you idiot!!

Seriously, any single guy looking to make headway here, patience and honesty will always win through.

Well said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi. I'm NEW to the site and completely new to swinging.

Just wanted to say BIG THANK YOU, for your time and effort to explain it all. I'm very grateful.

Big thank you one more time and I wish you all the best.

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By *uffnmuffCouple
over a year ago

London

Brilliant advice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Brilliant advice. "

Absolutely x

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By *jEuphoriaCouple
over a year ago

north kent

Perfect advice. Spot on.

I’d just like to add... Young men, don’t go in a club and say, “The women here, are too old”. At least twice I have overheard this. That’s just disrespectful, and judgmental.

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By *litstimulousMan
over a year ago

Swindon

I wonder where the op has gone... No longer on this site. Packed up and buggered orf!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perfect advice. Spot on.

I’d just like to add... Young men, don’t go in a club and say, “The women here, are too old”. At least twice I have overheard this. That’s just disrespectful, and judgmental.

Which club is that, and I'll head along to prove to the young men who that being "old" does not always equal looking it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great post and a great clarification for us new gents, It's greatly appreciated, especially for both subtle and obvious points.

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By *ustalittleKinkWoman
over a year ago

in the shadows

"I wonder where the op has gone... No longer on this site. Packed up and buggered orf!

He was struggling to get a meet even after reading his own advise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wonder where the op has gone... No longer on this site. Packed up and buggered orf!

He was struggling to get a meet even after reading his own advise "

Perhaps he was only here to offer advise,now that work is done,he's in downing Street trying to sort David Cameron's Brexit bollocks

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

Very good advice there. Women are not meat so respect at all times well unless their profile said so simple really

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wonder where the op has gone... No longer on this site. Packed up and buggered orf!

Gone off to enjoy pastures greener ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm tempted to write my own guide for single men now, though it'd be totally different than this one.

Funny how we all look at fab in different ways.

Bottom of the feeding pile? Please.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"I'm tempted to write my own guide for single men now, though it'd be totally different than this one.

Funny how we all look at fab in different ways.

Bottom of the feeding pile? Please. "

Go on, do it, you know you want to....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm tempted to write my own guide for single men now, though it'd be totally different than this one.

Funny how we all look at fab in different ways.

Bottom of the feeding pile? Please.

Go on, do it, you know you want to....

Ghengis's guide to bottom feeding?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm tempted to write my own guide for single men now, though it'd be totally different than this one.

Funny how we all look at fab in different ways.

Bottom of the feeding pile? Please.

Go on, do it, you know you want to....

Ghengis's guide to bottom feeding?"

I did it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great advice thanks

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By *oki040Man
over a year ago

Mablethorpe

Straight up talk but should definitely be common sense in men to do this, the ones that don't cause problems for any decent blokes out there, shout out to all the genuine guys out there, making it possible for the rest.

Brilliant post.

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By *jb773Man
over a year ago

Bishops Stortford

"Very, very good advice. Can't fault it.

But now you've just enhanced their chances and harmed ours you idiot!!

Seriously, any single guy looking to make headway here, patience and honesty will always win through.

How did you talk to someone not looking for single guys? The site tells me i cant message them because of their filters

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Very, very good advice. Can't fault it.

But now you've just enhanced their chances and harmed ours you idiot!!

Seriously, any single guy looking to make headway here, patience and honesty will always win through.

How did you talk to someone not looking for single guys? The site tells me i cant message them because of their filters"

The lady concerned probably didn't have single guys filtered out and had only written it on her profile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"thus proving the point that the gals can spot the good 'uns from the bad 'uns...)"

That's nonsense frankly ! I'm a good un and don't get that much luck on here. I realise it's largely because I'm not a looker as to why. That and the bloody trend for beards!

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

"A 21 yr old male just messaged me and i quote'' fancy afuk toynt bbe?'' I couldnt bloody read it let alone anything else! That is NOT the way to get a lady interested!

PMSL

I find the majority of single guys who message crude one-liners are quite young, and I wish there is a filter that allows a certain age group to be blocked, as per individual's preference

Of course you can. Go to Account - Message Preferences.

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

"Perfect advice. Spot on.

I’d just like to add... Young men, don’t go in a club and say, “The women here, are too old”. At least twice I have overheard this. That’s just disrespectful, and judgmental.

No one can guarantee them what women will be like in a particular club on a particular night. Women are equally guests there, not a part of the service. Some men just can't treat women as their equals.

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By *jb773Man
over a year ago

Bishops Stortford

"thus proving the point that the gals can spot the good 'uns from the bad 'uns...)

That's nonsense frankly ! I'm a good un and don't get that much luck on here. I realise it's largely because I'm not a looker as to why. That and the bloody trend for beards! "
you say that, but I've had two rejections due to having a beard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"thus proving the point that the gals can spot the good 'uns from the bad 'uns...)

That's nonsense frankly ! I'm a good un and don't get that much luck on here. I realise it's largely because I'm not a looker as to why. That and the bloody trend for beards! you say that, but I've had two rejections due to having a beard"

My wife loves beards at the end of the day it's just people's preferences that's all you'll win some you'll loose some.

KJ x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It says a lot that most of the replies are UNLOS!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pretty obvious. Calm down mate. And re the beard thing ^ most women on here are weird. Beards are manly and hair in the nether regions on a woman is a total turn on and natural. Shaved vaginas just look weird.

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By *ig_J_0526Man
over a year ago

Sussex

Good advice, I feel sorry for the women on here - am sure they get bombarded with so much shite.

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By *ssex 2204Man
over a year ago

billericay

Great read

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By *apidRapidsMan
over a year ago

Stoke-on-Trent

All very true... Well written too. It's a numbers game in here, but yes politeness and a goods profile certainly help... And good humour. Here it's difficult to stand out... Sea of dross, etc... It really is so much easier to pull in Tesco and in the night club - I'm lucky that I do. Go focus your minds there and see if getting your cock out for the ladies works wonders at the meat counter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best advice on here tbh wish I knew at the start. I was annoying on here at first.!got a few messages which put me in my place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would have thought most of this was common sense haha. Maybe not!

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By *hampagne_Supernova_91Man
over a year ago

Manchester

Don't be a pest and always show respect seems to work well for me!

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By *ncemoreroundthesunCouple
over a year ago

on the move

That's great.

Honesty and respect are universal for all of us, couples and singles alike

Reading the profile though definitely, there should be a short quiz before allowing a first message to check

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By *averockrockMan
over a year ago

swindon

Great stuff!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Love it, love it, LOVE IT!!! Thank you Mr O

Its not too late in life to learn I say (some females and couples can do with a few lessons also though!)"

This should be a pinned post admin

Shame the few I have met don't follow this

Stick to the club scene...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Great stuff!

Its spot on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would have thought most of this was common sense haha. Maybe not!"

Looks are deceiving... Unless everyone had common sense

Sadly not many have

Many have no sense

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very good advice much appreciated cheers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wish this was a mandatory message for everyone to read after signing up for the site.

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

I find this a condescending and insulting, if something like this was put up for women their would be outrage.

To put it simply if a guy cant sort his profile out and find out what works for him on his own then he deserves fail.

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By *udewhennudeMan
over a year ago

newport

"I find this a condescending and insulting, if something like this was put up for women their would be outrage.

To put it simply if a guy cant sort his profile out and find out what works for him on his own then he deserves fail. "

Exactly , not only is it patronising but it shows bad people how to be something they are not. Then when the turn up they are not as expected.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Interesting to see how many on this thread are now UNLOS, including the OP!"

Including you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe it was written by a woman....

Same goes for women because we are not all so perfect either

Off to eat my sausages and roast veg.

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"I find this a condescending and insulting, if something like this was put up for women their would be outrage.

To put it simply if a guy cant sort his profile out and find out what works for him on his own then he deserves fail. "

It was written 10 years ago, and while I wouldn't want to help idiots hide their idiocy either, I know thatvut was written in a more positive, inclusive way than that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP has some excellent points. Calm yoselves, gentlemen. A little perspective is no bad thing.

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

I stopped reading the op when he said I had 'no power'

***news flash***

I have exactly the same power as anyone else.

Yes please or no thanks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

12) FAB FORUMS

forum covers a very tiny % of fab swinger's even less of the scene as a whole there for the forums are to be taken with a pinch of salt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why are single guys ‘bottom feeders’? That’s offensive. Single women get tons of messages and likes, yet guys might as well not even exist on here. I don’t get it why women don’t look for people like guys do and why there are so many guys? It’s like the ratio of men to women in this world is 10:1 or at least looking.

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

The ratio of men to women could well be 1to 10 on this site, possibly higher

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks for the heads up

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