FabSwingers.com forum: First mmf

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

We are looking to meet another man for our first mmf but not sure weather we should meet someone our age ,younger or older or maybe it makes no difference. We are thinking along the lines of someone older because we don't want someone younger and it be a competion about whose got the biggest cock or who is the best, although this may not happen. Are age may be ok but someone older with a bit of experience may be a bit more understanding that it will be my first mmf and may be nervous. Without making a generalisation a lot of the older men's profiles we have looked some of who we liked the look of are full of bareback pics and this puts us off, is it the case they are more willing to bareback than the younger ones or have we just come across more of these through chance ? We would love some advice from other couples on what they think about the age thing having made the same decisions themselves.....or maybe we just thinking about it far to much but we don't want it to be a bad experience and be put off. We not looking to make this a debate on the whole bareback issue as this has been done to death.

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By *nvyCouple
over a year ago

Waltham Cross

We started off with just oral on our first mmf so we could both decide if we liked it before jumping in to having full sex. As for the age thing it's entirely up to you guys, we won't meet a single guy who is under 25 and like them to be a bit clued up on the scene already...good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well good thing with safe sex is you dont really need to worry too much about what the other person has done if you make sure they are safe with you.

pictures could of been from their proper parters or something, but anyways, the best thing i think to do is go out there have a look and check out peoples verifications, look for someone who isnt hiding on their profile and showing face etc, and does not come accross pushy or demanding etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You could always meet a couple, that dont mind the guy getting abit more involved..

the girl can then take pics..

Theres a few profiles around that actually say that they do this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You could always meet a couple, that dont mind the guy getting abit more involved..

the girl can then take pics..

Theres a few profiles around that actually say that they do this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For our first MFM we booked a hotel and arranged to meet the chap in the bar. We all agreed well in advance that anyone could call it off an any point during the evening (any decent guy will go along with this). We also agreed that full sex was not guaranteed and that we'd just see how the evening went. In the event, the evening went off perfectly and everyone had a great time, but we think the neutrality of the venue and the setting of expectations in advance made all the difference.

As for the bareback question, it's just a case of making it clear that it won't happen.

Hope you have a great time!

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By *lam rockerMan
over a year ago

Tain

Firstly - the bareback thing is your choice - it's your body, plain and simple. I play safe as it is only fair on all parties that this is the way it goes. If someone is not prepared to play ball, then you do not want to see them. And when they get there, there should be no excuses about it.

Secondly, any meet is on the understanding that nothing may happen - I can't believe anyone could think it any other way.

I hope you find what you're after, though.

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By *inups99Couple
over a year ago

manchester

"For our first MFM we booked a hotel and arranged to meet the chap in the bar. We all agreed well in advance that anyone could call it off an any point during the evening (any decent guy will go along with this). We also agreed that full sex was not guaranteed and that we'd just see how the evening went. In the event, the evening went off perfectly and everyone had a great time, but we think the neutrality of the venue and the setting of expectations in advance made all the difference.

As for the bareback question, it's just a case of making it clear that it won't happen.

Hope you have a great time!"

Very good advice and remember that if the guy is genuine he will make the lady the centre of attention and what she wants as his priority. Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had 3 mmf's now off ere 2 I've joined a couple and too be honest, I felt honoured that they let me into their house and join in such a fantasy and there is no way I could start being pushy competitive etc if any bloke did I would suggest you asked them to leave!! On the other me and my fb invited someone to join us and again he was polite and non pushy, in fact in some ways u may find its the opposite, i.e you have to cajole the guy a bit at first, either way happy hunting and hope it goes well

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By *he rosesCouple
over a year ago

leeds

we have met quite a fair few single guys for mm+f and we've had (the very occasional) older AND younger guys who were competitive and tried to be domineering in the situation and so I dont think age has a lot to do with it. The vast majority of the guys we have met are lovely and we have met lots of them more than once. You just have to set your boundaries in the social chat before the meet, just say what your boundaries are and safe sex is one of them - then there's no issues. We also have a subtle signal between us that means "Im not comfortable with this" and the other partner then moves things around or makes a different suggestion to diffuse anyone being a little pushy or to even just move them away from doing something that isn't working. We also have a definite "stop everything now" signal. Luckily we have never had to use it! Good luck!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, I have been involved in a few mmf scenarios and can say its never come down to who is best who is bigger, its been about people having fun and enjoying the experience as i think most would agree that is what they are here for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we have met quite a fair few single guys for mm+f and we've had (the very occasional) older AND younger guys who were competitive and tried to be domineering in the situation and so I dont think age has a lot to do with it. The vast majority of the guys we have met are lovely and we have met lots of them more than once. You just have to set your boundaries in the social chat before the meet, just say what your boundaries are and safe sex is one of them - then there's no issues. We also have a subtle signal between us that means "Im not comfortable with this" and the other partner then moves things around or makes a different suggestion to diffuse anyone being a little pushy or to even just move them away from doing something that isn't working. We also have a definite "stop everything now" signal. Luckily we have never had to use it! Good luck!"

Yes, very good. We have a 'not happy' code-word. Like you, we've never had to use it

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By *eakcoupleCouple
over a year ago

peak district

One way to do this is to have a meet with a couple, then one person 'sits it out' while the other 3 do MFM and FMF. First time we did this was with a couple we met at a campsite, and apart from 4soming we also played as 3s in their caravan all weekend. Good fun and a nice way to experiment with threesome play.

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By *eakcoupleCouple
over a year ago

peak district

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We had a few social meets with guys we thought we might want to include in our first mmf (I had only ever kissed another guy at this point). There was one older and one younger, younger one seemed keen but it felt like he was already ready to boast to everyone in the bar, older guy was really attractive but it really didn't feel right for us.

Not saying every younger or older guy is like that at all but this has made us to always play with guys our own age

When it got down to the actual MMF we started out as just oral but after about 30mins it was full Safe sex..Threesomes are a good way to introduce partner swaps as pardon the pun, it's more hands on lol easier to make sure you are both happy with what's going on....we made sure he felt comfortable too and had lots of fun

hope you guys do too xx

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By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

we went out for a drink for our first met the fella back at our hotel for a drink when she felt ok she just said "right off to get ready il text when ok to cum up"

and left me with him to go thru whats ok and whats not

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"well good thing with safe sex is you dont really need to worry too much about what the other person has done if you make sure they are safe with you.

does not come accross pushy or demanding etc"

I think it does matter what they have done before in the way of bareback because although no sex Is the only safe sex there are ways to minimise risks one bring condoms etc but also avoiding people who do bareback will lower your chances of catching something. The part about people not being pushy or demanding is what worries us that they will think they have turned up so have a right to do whatever and feel let down if they don't get it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our first mmf was with an experienced guy who I'd met a couple of times and he was polite, respectful, non pushy and we had a great time! My advice would be to choose an experienced swinger for your first one. Hope it goes well. Ms x

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By *evilwolfCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

I wouldn't let age bother you on your choice of guy as long as you're both comfortable with him. You may have to meet a couple of times to have talked enough in the early days, just to give you both peace of mind... It gets easier the further in you get

If there's any doubts at all then just do oral for starters. You can always go further next time. It gives you two time to chat about the experience that way. If you go ahead and it pans out fine, then fantastic, you made it. If it doesn't then remember you always still have each other, you can always give it another go and you don't have to see the guy again...

Good luck

Wolf

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By *1ckeyMan
over a year ago

Camberley

I'm coming at this from the other side so to speak, so I can understand your nervousness.

I think the advice to start with oral - as I think most people that are looking to explore in this direction would be comfortable with that - and leave other things till you are happy - the mood may take you...

As for safe sex - I think for it's a good idea just from a hygeine stand point surely - if we are talking about another man ?

Happy hunting...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

not sure if this has been already said, but make sure you find someone that you both get along with, on our first mmf we spoke about what we would wouldnt do before hand and i just let luke take the lead!! but only do what your all happy with.. good luck

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