FabSwingers.com forum: How do you do it?

By *aucyknickers OP Woman
over a year ago

Midlands ish

How do you stop it getting to you? Not the rejection so much, just people not being who they say they are, the people who want to send abuse, the ones who you meet and then they vanish...

Am I just not cut out for this? Really hard to just not let it get to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree but I always think for every no there’s a yes which is well worth waiting for so keep your chin up x

Ps it’s a yes from me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On this site you just have to adopt a thicker skin ignore and block and report those who abuse you and dont let it grind you down your here for you no one else is the best advice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just delete and block the ones who are abusive and if they decide too blow you off it's there fault keep your chin up you will find decent people on here soon.

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By *ack_at_the_farm....Man
over a year ago

woodhall spa

Try focus on the positives and perhaps take a short break. Do what feels right inside and don’t allow your decision to be clouded by others advice

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By *aucyknickers OP Woman
over a year ago

Midlands ish

Thanks all.

Taking a break as suggested, just feel my self confidence is really dented at the moment. Feel like I have been taken for a mug, people say everything you want them to to get you into bed and then they are someone different. I don’t want a relationship, but I do want respect.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Sadly a site like this will always attract the type of people you've encountered OP and there's no easy answer to avoiding them if they're determined enough and it's definitely difficult to see the wood for the trees at times.

All you can do is try and develop a "radar" that helps differentiate the unsavoury types from those that are genuine in their intentions - which is not easy I know - for me it's about taking my time getting to know people and not rushing into meeting - if someone still wants to meet me after several weeks of messaging covering all kinds of subjects, not just sexual ones, it's a fairly good indication that they're above board and usually leads to far more satisfying encounters too

As a woman on this site, you'll still get those that have a sense of entitlement and unrealistic expectations, or who send abusive messages - sadly all you can do is, as others have suggested, harden yourself to them a little and just block (and report where necessary).

Alternatively block all single men from messaging you and do your own hunting only picking out those that match what you're looking for - which puts you firmly in control

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By *ana_nana_MATTMAN!Man
over a year ago

Haywood Village, Weston-super-Mare

The advice I'd normally give in these kind of situations, is to change tactics.

Most girls only speak to guys who message them first, if that's what you do, try doing the opposite. Search for guys that you like and message them. It gives you an extra bit of control over the situation.

In addition to that, just be cautious of anyone who comes across as too confident or cocky, they are often over compensating or trying to deceive. If someone projects an image of themselves that seems too good to be true, it probably is.

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By *aucyknickers OP Woman
over a year ago

Midlands ish

Maybe that’s what I need to do. But a break first. That way I can mentally try to get back into a better frame of mind.

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By *rcher69Man
over a year ago

nr Milton Keynes

"How do you stop it getting to you? Not the rejection so much, just people not being who they say they are, the people who want to send abuse, the ones who you meet and then they vanish...

Am I just not cut out for this? Really hard to just not let it get to you."

I don't get why anyone would post abuse, to anyone. I'm sorry you've had your 'fair' share too. There's a lot of good ones out there, sure you'll find more of them than the others.

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