FabSwingers.com forum: help with messages

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi. This is a joint account with me and my partner and he has left me in charge of all initial contact. I have sent a message to a few women on here and he isn't happy with it. The part he doesn't like is

"He would probably want to meet u alone knowing him but it's agreed that we would only meet as a 3sum at all times."

He says it looks like he's going to try and pester women to meet alone for fun. I said it's to see if they really want a 3sum as some women like to take what other women have and if they suggest a single meet they aren't what we are looking for.

How does the sentence read to you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi. This is a joint account with me and my partner and he has left me in charge of all initial contact. I have sent a message to a few women on here and he isn't happy with it. The part he doesn't like is

"He would probably want to meet u alone knowing him but it's agreed that we would only meet as a 3sum at all times."

How does the sentence read to you?"

I'd make it clear on your profile you're only after threesomes, aiming you already haven't, rather than that in a message.

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By *opping_candyWoman
over a year ago

West Yorkshire

It reads like you don't trust him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It reads like you don't trust him. "

I would assume a couple contacting me would be meeting as a couple. I would question why you would include that in a message ie has he done it before and now you are warning me off.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

I think there are a lot better ways to say the same thing but worded differently.

All you really need is a line in the message, as well as on your profile, that says something along the lines of "We're only interested in meeting as a couple" - which covers it from all angles.

The way you have it would probably put a lot of people off as it infers your other half will likely try to meet them on his own, or even that this is actually a guy hiding behind a couples profile to get meets, despite you saying otherwise on both counts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It makes it sound like he wants 1on1 meets but you don't want him to... and tbh if anyone you message reads this post I would think it is very likely to put them off meeting you, what with the remark about some women wanting what other women have! That just makes me think that swinging in any capacity is not for you

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

If that was in a message aimed at me I would run for the hills.

It screams jealousy and possessiveness.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the feedback.

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By *orticiaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

"It reads like you don't trust him.

I would assume a couple contacting me would be meeting as a couple. I would question why you would include that in a message ie has he done it before and now you are warning me off. "

I agree - I’d run a mile because it sounds like there are trust issues & that not everything is good between you

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By *orticiaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

I’d also add that if you feel the need to word it that way, you might want to seriously consider if Swinging is for you, as it sounds like you may have some concerns? x

Good luck OP

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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago

Stoke area

I agree that this sounds a couple with problems and you don't trust him. I would not go anywhere near him of that was a message I got.

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

I don’t even think you need to include it. Just say hi. Identify whoever in the couple is mailing and say you are interested in mff.

There needs to be no more details than that.

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By *exi7000Couple
over a year ago

London

I personally do not believe you are real couple. Sorry for my blunt statement but you look like a fake profile to me, and on top of everything your message sound weird.

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By *traight up guyMan
over a year ago

Morpeth

Just be straight with people as to what you want. It avoids confusion

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