FabSwingers.com forum: Lost my bottle

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Advice desperately required..

After a few disastrous meets

( wont go into detail)

I seem to have lost my bottle/ confidence about meeting again!!

Wondering if Im fabbed out ???!

Help xxx

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

"Advice desperately required..

After a few disastrous meets

( wont go into detail)

I seem to have lost my bottle/ confidence about meeting again!!

Wondering if Im fabbed out ???!

Help xxx"

Maybe in an organised social, not so much safety in numbers, but perhaps a reassuring room full of like-minded real people. Hope you get your fab mojo back asap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It happens to us all, the crisis of confidence. Was there anything you could’ve done differently to avoid the disasters?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try going to a club. You have the social areas so you won't feel any pressure, then the possibility of fun is always on the cards if you wish. Plus a chance to dress as sexily as you like in public x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I usually take a break when I'm feeling that way. Then decide if I think it's worth returning. Try not to reflect too much on whatever has happened, can do your head in. Best of luck x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Exactly the same thing has happened to me ( Yasmin) in my head I really want things to go a certain way but I seem to mess up every meet recently , to the point I don’t think David wants to go on with anymore .. I seem to of totally lost my confidence too which doesn’t help ..

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By *hedevilwearspradaWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere nearby

"It happens to us all, the crisis of confidence. Was there anything you could’ve done differently to avoid the disasters? "

Definitely this. It happened to me recently, properly got the fear and didn’t have meets for a while.

My new couple of new meets were with people who I talked with lots first, and that helped.

You will get your mojo back

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By *hedevilwearspradaWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere nearby

*next couple

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Can I be a naive idiot and ask why would a lady lose her confidence? There are so many men keen to meet you all! Is that the issue? Some sort of ‘why am I doing this?’ feeling or what?

As self aware as I am - I’m not getting this one.

Steve

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can I be a naive idiot and ask why would a lady lose her confidence? There are so many men keen to meet you all! Is that the issue? Some sort of ‘why am I doing this?’ feeling or what?

As self aware as I am - I’m not getting this one.

Steve

A lot of fellas just seem to like the thrill of the chase & act really keen,but when it comes to actually meeting they disappear x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can I be a naive idiot and ask why would a lady lose her confidence? There are so many men keen to meet you all! Is that the issue? Some sort of ‘why am I doing this?’ feeling or what?

As self aware as I am - I’m not getting this one.

Steve

Everyone can have anxiety issues. Could be an A list actress, or a dock worker.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Can I be a naive idiot and ask why would a lady lose her confidence? There are so many men keen to meet you all! Is that the issue? Some sort of ‘why am I doing this?’ feeling or what?

As self aware as I am - I’m not getting this one.

Steve

A lot of fellas just seem to like the thrill of the chase & act really keen,but when it comes to actually meeting they disappear x"

Oh, right.

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

Whoever is going through this, try and remember that was then, what happen forward of today is new, and a chance to be yourselves and start afresh, don't be a prisoner of past woes.

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By *onforming_deviantWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"Advice desperately required..

After a few disastrous meets

( wont go into detail)

I seem to have lost my bottle/ confidence about meeting again!!

Wondering if Im fabbed out ???!

Help xxx"

Without knowing your details i can relate.

Its not about 'any guy' being willing to meet.. its knowing youll be safe and actually have FUN not just be used as a convenient soft pocket to wank into

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Absolutely xxx

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

Totally understand this ..... sometimes I question why I bother and what’s the point ... I can’t seem to meet a regular FB over here ... I know there is one in Cyprus but can’t be hopping over there every 5 mins ... and the men I’ve been meeting don’t seem to return for a second meeting .... so I start to feel used and that I’m working my way through the site something I don’t want to do ....

Perhaps a break is needed

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By *onforming_deviantWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"Totally understand this ..... sometimes I question why I bother and what’s the point ... I can’t seem to meet a regular FB over here ... I know there is one in Cyprus but can’t be hopping over there every 5 mins ... and the men I’ve been meeting don’t seem to return for a second meeting .... so I start to feel used and that I’m working my way through the site something I don’t want to do ....

Perhaps a break is needed

I keep trying to break.... n i last a week or two n them hope creeps back in hehehe

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

Perhaps a break is needed

I keep trying to break.... n i last a week or two n them hope creeps back in hehehe"

Can see that being me too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve lost confidence a few times, Mess the meet up a bit. I sometimes be a bit anxious that I may not live up to expectations, or dissapointed in some aspect.

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By *unning LinguistMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Possibly tone down the profile slightly? "No fuck wits"...? There are a lot of nice guys on here. We're the ones whose messages usually go unanswered...

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By *andycd20000TV/TS
over a year ago

limerick side of ennis.

Never let anyone get to you all. I don’t.

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

"Never let anyone get to you all. I don’t. "

Sound advice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Advice desperately required..

After a few disastrous meets

( wont go into detail)

I seem to have lost my bottle/ confidence about meeting again!!

Wondering if Im fabbed out ???!

Help xxx"

Go along to a club one night, plenty of people to meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t disagree with this but it doesn’t help when single males are notoriously ridiculed for being the same, time wasting, pic hunting no shows that people have branded upon us just because you get the idiots that do, do it.

Not everybody is the same.

Me personally am happy with socials, hence why I go to the attic quite abit.

But messaging people on here? Not a chance lol.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Perhaps a break is needed

They will come back when they have no luck with anyone else. I've met a couple who said they wanted regular, once they were verified they thought it was a free pass to be knee deep in women. Didn't work for them and I refused to meet them again.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

I now insist on a social meet first. It loses most of the instashag crew.

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

Perhaps a break is needed

Yep that’s what I’m feeling ... get a veri and then they are off ... I’ve decided I won’t be meeting them again

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By *onforming_deviantWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"I now insist on a social meet first. It loses most of the instashag crew. "

I do this too. And i say i wont 'meet' straight after a social... i find most decent guys can make time for a social but then it doesnt go any further... single and unavailable haha

But i LOVE the term instashag haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shit happens baby, maybe it just no longer isn't your cup of tea and if that's the case - so be it

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

"Advice desperately required..

After a few disastrous meets

( wont go into detail)

I seem to have lost my bottle/ confidence about meeting again!!

Wondering if Im fabbed out ???!

Help xxx

Maybe in an organised social, not so much safety in numbers, but perhaps a reassuring room full of like-minded real people. Hope you get your fab mojo back asap "

Totally agree, there are some great socials (some in clubs) coming up.

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By *istnbroke69Man
over a year ago

Cheshire / Shropshire

I am at the stage now thinking I not suited here as keep being dismissed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Advice desperately required..

After a few disastrous meets

( wont go into detail)

I seem to have lost my bottle/ confidence about meeting again!!

Wondering if Im fabbed out ???!

Help xxx"

I have this same dilemma

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By * and BCouple
over a year ago

Durham

Social events are always full of great, respectful, like minded people. That could be a good way to get your mojo back. Meeting genuine, like minded folk with no expectations could just be the pill you need OP. Check out the forums for upcoming events

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"I am at the stage now thinking I not suited here as keep being dismissed

Lose the paragraph about people being ‘above themselves’ mate, I’m sure it’s off-putting for many

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Great advice guys . Thank you.. xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Advice desperately required..

After a few disastrous meets

( wont go into detail)

I seem to have lost my bottle/ confidence about meeting again!!

Wondering if Im fabbed out ???!

Help xxx"

yeap,,its over,,may as well give up,,call ita day,,its dead,,its pointless

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Great advice guys . Thank you.. xxxx"

awe shucks ty,xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

oh,,,speaking of bottles,,think i,ll open another one

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By *laclkguyMan
over a year ago

Pontefract

"Advice desperately required..

After a few disastrous meets

( wont go into detail)

I seem to have lost my bottle/ confidence about meeting again!!

Wondering if Im fabbed out ???!

Help xxx"

maybe going to a social or going to a club with a friend

no pressure and just a good laugh should be the aim

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm the same

Fell away from meets and swinging and lost confidence

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm the same

Fell away from meets and swinging and lost confidence "

Us too. We had a meet this weekend and it did not go to plan. Mrs just did not click with the other person and just could not get into the meet. It died the death after she got a phone call from someone needing an emergency. Sha says she still wants to play with the right person though. So there may still be a chance that we will be able to play. As some others have said a club with a social seems the way to go, we a re now planning a visit to After 8 in Edinburgh to see if she can get into the swing (pardon the pun).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Advice desperately required..

After a few disastrous meets

( wont go into detail)

I seem to have lost my bottle/ confidence about meeting again!!

Wondering if Im fabbed out ???!

Help xxx

Maybe in an organised social, not so much safety in numbers, but perhaps a reassuring room full of like-minded real people. Hope you get your fab mojo back asap "

I can echo this, having recently attended an organised social I'm now excited again. Plus it's a good night out with no pressure and you make new friends and potential meets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

im yet to have a meet at all and i have lost all confidence in even being remotely attractive..... im convinced im much better looking with a lampshade on my head....even better if it has fringing...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's some oddities in swinging I'm really not sure I understand and sometimes there's so much 'not' about that I wonder whether its all worth the hassle.

Ultimately, I like meeting new people and having new sexual experiences. To me that's what swinging is about, rather than having a partner or looking for one, because that's a relationship... But as a single person, what I miss from being in a couple, is the sharing the experience... the anticipation is similar, but the post experience chat is very different.

Anyway.. maybe what you're missing is something that you can't find here (or shouldn't) and perhaps when you find that, swinging might work for you better.

Good luck, OP and everyone else in chasing your dreams. x

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