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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward " i was going to say i hope he was being sarcastic.... otherwise his veri's from all the different clubs he has been to is going to make him look like a bit of a hypocrite.... | |||
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"Never been to a club so don't know what the vibe is around single guys. I'm guessing they are welcomed as what I've read about clubs is all very positive. However, is it normally a case of people sticking together or once you get chatting and invited to have some fun then it all just flows from there? Looking to go to one but just want to understand a bit more first Thanks x" If you're willing to be open, friendly, able to engage in polite friendly conversation and graciously accept a polite "no thanks" then clubs can be a great way to meet people If however you're a wallflower, or decide to join the ranks of the wanking conga line of single blokes that roves the club, then you'll find it pretty soul destroying and an expensive night out. Treat a club visit the same as you would going to a bar - go with no expectations of anything "happening" - make sure to dress to impress, take a tour of the club and ask questions and listen to the etiquette/rules and you won't go far wrong | |||
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"Never been to a club so don't know what the vibe is around single guys. I'm guessing they are welcomed as what I've read about clubs is all very positive. However, is it normally a case of people sticking together or once you get chatting and invited to have some fun then it all just flows from there? Looking to go to one but just want to understand a bit more first Thanks x" get to a club . many singles are wanted by couples at clubs, the club we go to has many who enjoy couples. | |||
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"Never been to a club so don't know what the vibe is around single guys. I'm guessing they are welcomed as what I've read about clubs is all very positive. However, is it normally a case of people sticking together or once you get chatting and invited to have some fun then it all just flows from there? Looking to go to one but just want to understand a bit more first Thanks x If you're willing to be open, friendly, able to engage in polite friendly conversation and graciously accept a polite "no thanks" then clubs can be a great way to meet people If however you're a wallflower, or decide to join the ranks of the wanking conga line of single blokes that roves the club, then you'll find it pretty soul destroying and an expensive night out. Treat a club visit the same as you would going to a bar - go with no expectations of anything "happening" - make sure to dress to impress, take a tour of the club and ask questions and listen to the etiquette/rules and you won't go far wrong " well said. | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there." Decent single men get treated very well actually and are very much in demand in the club I go to. | |||
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"It is less about clubs taking care of single guys, more all people making time to talk to each other as Fabio mentioned on another thread. You are not guaranteed any action going to a club, no means no, but talking to couples and single girls (or guys) depending on preferences is the way forward. Be engaging, just say hello and don’t be a wall flower. Beyond that give a few different nights a try as they vary based on numbers and specific peole on each night. Enjoy " All good advice OP, but do read the club reviews section in here, and specifically those left by single guys | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there." The only problem is the club's allow all sexual preferences to attend. | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. The only problem is the club's allow all sexual preferences to attend. " He might see.... A penis! | |||
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"Never been to a club so don't know what the vibe is around single guys. I'm guessing they are welcomed as what I've read about clubs is all very positive. However, is it normally a case of people sticking together or once you get chatting and invited to have some fun then it all just flows from there? Looking to go to one but just want to understand a bit more first Thanks x If you're willing to be open, friendly, able to engage in polite friendly conversation and graciously accept a polite "no thanks" then clubs can be a great way to meet people If however you're a wallflower, or decide to join the ranks of the wanking conga line of single blokes that roves the club, then you'll find it pretty soul destroying and an expensive night out. Treat a club visit the same as you would going to a bar - go with no expectations of anything "happening" - make sure to dress to impress, take a tour of the club and ask questions and listen to the etiquette/rules and you won't go far wrong " Good advice, take note and then go and give a club a try. | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. The only problem is the club's allow all sexual preferences to attend. " So? Just say a polite "no thank you". | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. The only problem is the club's allow all sexual preferences to attend. " So just use the opportunity to try something new... | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. The only problem is the club's allow all sexual preferences to attend. He might see.... A penis! " Oooops, there goes my coffee | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there." I'd disagree with this myself, as I've witnessed many single guys have fun in a swingers club, and we're a couple that play solo so single guys have met my other half. Remember though, that unless you have decent social skills in the setting, it's easy to come across as desperate when you haven't taken a partner. Be willing to hang back by the bar, and make conversation when it seems to come to you, and let people go with a good impression of you. These are the guys I see being the most successful. Ones willing to put themselves out there, and be friendly to everyone, but not ever seem like they're thinking about joining you already and being to clingy. | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. The only problem is the club's allow all sexual preferences to attend. He might see.... A penis! Oooops, there goes my coffee " If I had one then mine would have gone too!! Perish the thought he went to one on a Bi Night by mistake and saw that penis going somewhere | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. The only problem is the club's allow all sexual preferences to attend. He might see.... A penis! Oooops, there goes my coffee If I had one then mine would have gone too!! Perish the thought he went to one on a Bi Night by mistake and saw that penis going somewhere" Sounds like a good night, to me | |||
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"I struggle going on my own. Probs cus I'm shit in social situations and if someone doesn't pursue me I don't think they are interested so I don't bother " I think it is similar for everyone, regardless of gender. If you are socially awkward and have difficulty in "normal" social situations then it will be even more difficult for you in a sexually charged environment like a club. Clubs are a fantastic night out but if you can't make conversation with strangers you may not have a great time. | |||
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"Never been to a club so don't know what the vibe is around single guys. I'm guessing they are welcomed as what I've read about clubs is all very positive. However, is it normally a case of people sticking together or once you get chatting and invited to have some fun then it all just flows from there? Looking to go to one but just want to understand a bit more first Thanks x" i go with no expectations and anything that happens is a bonus. | |||
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"Hopefully a few useful tips and observations: Pick your venue and your night carefully - ideally an event where ladies and couples will be actively looking for single / extra males (greedy girls / gang bangs / Milf nights whatever) my advice is to get onto a guest list early for a club event where they restrict single male numbers, that way you find yourself more as an attraction than just being another ‘eager gentlemen’ joining what Gemini Man so eloquently described as the “Roving wanking conga line” . You don’t want masses of competition on the night. Be well groomed, smell nice, dress fashionably and smart and socialise in the bar and around the couches, don’t barge in and interrupt, sit down uninvited or invade personal space. Say hello, (“mind if I sit down, thanks. My name’s .....”) be polite, bit of light hearted chat, be funny and be charming if possible. Above all don’t come across as eager and desperate! See if you can make at least a social connection with ladies or couples / whoever on Fab before you go, that way you will avoid the complete stranger wall flower awkwardness. Swearing, pushy, arrogance are turnoffs similarly shyness and lack of confidence won’t do you any favours either - talk to a couple as a couple. Hangout where you can be found, a recent club date saw a couple of men she would’ve liked to invite to join but couldn’t find them when the time was right. Passing the time in a dark sauna in an obscure secluded part of the club will not get you on the team. Don’t join a single men huddle waiting in a narrow bit of a corridor that we have to awkwardly squeeze past. A lady / couple will want to look you over from a relaxed comfortable distance, check you out, watch you for a while, consider, discuss possibilities and scenarios and approach. Place yourself somewhere where they can do that. Don’t be an obvious peacock but be aware you are on display, don’t slouch or appear anti-social. Show them you’re prepared, that you know what you’re doing and will play safe - Carry a little cool looking zipped bag with a good supply of condoms and lube etc. and put your key around it or in it. Wearing your key on your wrist (especially with a single condom tucked under - are you going to stop and run down to the machine / bar to get the inevitable replacements when needed?) and making an annoying jangle is off-putting / fucking annoying, Wrist keys ought to be banned. Especially while wanking. Don’t follow couples or women around the club not having said hello or detected a bit of a come-on - wink or smile, beckoning finger, it’s just fucking creepy. Wear a nice towel of your own (not featuring a George’s Cross or a Disney character!) it helps you standout from the crowd and some of the threadbare club towels look skanky, too small and don’t look good on a guy. Above all good luck May the farce be with you A" Nice one Andrew! | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward " I agree here. I’ve never been treated badly at any club or party i’ve been to. obv the way you conduct yourself is the key. Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast " Just once, I would love this to be true | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast Just once, I would love this to be true " Are you saying you’ve not had great experiences | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast Just once, I would love this to be true Are you saying you’ve not had great experiences " Exactly this fella | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast Just once, I would love this to be true Are you saying you’ve not had great experiences Exactly this fella " I find this really hard to understand as I've got many male friends on the scene and they all do very well in clubs. | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast Just once, I would love this to be true Are you saying you’ve not had great experiences Exactly this fella I find this really hard to understand as I've got many male friends on the scene and they all do very well in clubs. " You should try it from my side lol! You will see from my verifications, that I do pretty well in Fab. I find clubs depressing. | |||
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"All totally excellent advice about being chatty, polite, good hygine etc. I'd suggest looking for a club running a newbie night. You might feel more comfortable knowing lots of other newbies are around." Cue the plug for the newbie night I am running this Friday in Stoke | |||
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"All totally excellent advice about being chatty, polite, good hygine etc. I'd suggest looking for a club running a newbie night. You might feel more comfortable knowing lots of other newbies are around. Cue the plug for the newbie night I am running this Friday in Stoke " Well done and good luck xx | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast Just once, I would love this to be true Are you saying you’ve not had great experiences Exactly this fella I find this really hard to understand as I've got many male friends on the scene and they all do very well in clubs. You should try it from my side lol! You will see from my verifications, that I do pretty well in Fab. I find clubs depressing." Why depressing? | |||
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"All totally excellent advice about being chatty, polite, good hygine etc. I'd suggest looking for a club running a newbie night. You might feel more comfortable knowing lots of other newbies are around. Cue the plug for the newbie night I am running this Friday in Stoke Well done and good luck xx" Thankyou. Had a lot of interest with the idea of going to a local pub, answering questions and then going in as a small group. | |||
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"All totally excellent advice about being chatty, polite, good hygine etc. I'd suggest looking for a club running a newbie night. You might feel more comfortable knowing lots of other newbies are around. Cue the plug for the newbie night I am running this Friday in Stoke Well done and good luck xx Thankyou. Had a lot of interest with the idea of going to a local pub, answering questions and then going in as a small group. " It's a very good idea Lizzy if I wasn't working I'd of come, try and keep some cuties for me | |||
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"Hopefully a few useful tips and observations: Pick your venue and your night carefully - ideally an event where ladies and couples will be actively looking for single / extra males (greedy girls / gang bangs / Milf nights whatever) my advice is to get onto a guest list early for a club event where they restrict single male numbers, that way you find yourself more as an attraction than just being another ‘eager gentlemen’ joining what Gemini Man so eloquently described as the “Roving wanking conga line” . You don’t want masses of competition on the night. Be well groomed, smell nice, dress fashionably and smart and socialise in the bar and around the couches, don’t barge in and interrupt, sit down uninvited or invade personal space. Say hello, (“mind if I sit down, thanks. My name’s .....”) be polite, bit of light hearted chat, be funny and be charming if possible. Above all don’t come across as eager and desperate! See if you can make at least a social connection with ladies or couples / whoever on Fab before you go, that way you will avoid the complete stranger wall flower awkwardness. Swearing, pushy, arrogance are turnoffs similarly shyness and lack of confidence won’t do you any favours either - talk to a couple as a couple. Hangout where you can be found, a recent club date saw a couple of men she would’ve liked to invite to join but couldn’t find them when the time was right. Passing the time in a dark sauna in an obscure secluded part of the club will not get you on the team. Don’t join a single men huddle waiting in a narrow bit of a corridor that we have to awkwardly squeeze past. A lady / couple will want to look you over from a relaxed comfortable distance, check you out, watch you for a while, consider, discuss possibilities and scenarios and approach. Place yourself somewhere where they can do that. Don’t be an obvious peacock but be aware you are on display, don’t slouch or appear anti-social. Show them you’re prepared, that you know what you’re doing and will play safe - Carry a little cool looking zipped bag with a good supply of condoms and lube etc. and put your key around it or in it. Wearing your key on your wrist (especially with a single condom tucked under - are you going to stop and run down to the machine / bar to get the inevitable replacements when needed?) and making an annoying jangle is off-putting / fucking annoying, Wrist keys ought to be banned. Especially while wanking. Don’t follow couples or women around the club not having said hello or detected a bit of a come-on - wink or smile, beckoning finger, it’s just fucking creepy. Wear a nice towel of your own (not featuring a George’s Cross or a Disney character!) it helps you standout from the crowd and some of the threadbare club towels look skanky, too small and don’t look good on a guy. Above all good luck May the farce be with you A" Excellent tips !! I actually think you are spot on !!! | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast Just once, I would love this to be true Are you saying you’ve not had great experiences Exactly this fella I find this really hard to understand as I've got many male friends on the scene and they all do very well in clubs. You should try it from my side lol! You will see from my verifications, that I do pretty well in Fab. I find clubs depressing. Why depressing? " Depressing because I've never felt more alone, than when I've been in one of these clubs. The 'warmest of welcomes' usually lasts long enough for you to pay your membership/entrance fee, and once you've had 'The Tour', you're on your own. It's easy to feel like a fish out of water, when you don't know anybody, and you're in unfamiliar surroundings, but when you try to engage with others, and people don't reciprocate, or worse, look away so they don't catch your eye, it's time for a wander, because your bum has gone numb on the bar stool. So wander you do, only now, you've to walk that line between 'nice guy having a look', and 'wank zombie on the prowl', which is what you know you look like, as a single guy wandering the playrooms by yourself. So you find somewhere else to sit down, and wonder if any of the regulars have noticed nobody is talking to the new guy, on his own, looking at his watch, realising he's been in here for two hours now, and Jeez, this is depressing........... | |||
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" Depressing because I've never felt more alone, than when I've been in one of these clubs. The 'warmest of welcomes' usually lasts long enough for you to pay your membership/entrance fee, and once you've had 'The Tour', you're on your own. It's easy to feel like a fish out of water, when you don't know anybody, and you're in unfamiliar surroundings, but when you try to engage with others, and people don't reciprocate, or worse, look away so they don't catch your eye, it's time for a wander, because your bum has gone numb on the bar stool. So wander you do, only now, you've to walk that line between 'nice guy having a look', and 'wank zombie on the prowl', which is what you know you look like, as a single guy wandering the playrooms by yourself. So you find somewhere else to sit down, and wonder if any of the regulars have noticed nobody is talking to the new guy, on his own, looking at his watch, realising he's been in here for two hours now, and Jeez, this is depressing..........." You've had a verification from one of my friends at Chams and I know full well she's one of the friendliest people. Are you completely sure you have tried to communicate with people? The regulars at Chams on a Friday are usually a friendly bunch and try to make new people welcome. I always try to make sure I talk to newbies | |||
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"Never been to a club so don't know what the vibe is around single guys. I'm guessing they are welcomed as what I've read about clubs is all very positive. However, is it normally a case of people sticking together or once you get chatting and invited to have some fun then it all just flows from there? Looking to go to one but just want to understand a bit more first Thanks x If you're willing to be open, friendly, able to engage in polite friendly conversation and graciously accept a polite "no thanks" then clubs can be a great way to meet people If however you're a wallflower, or decide to join the ranks of the wanking conga line of single blokes that roves the club, then you'll find it pretty soul destroying and an expensive night out. Treat a club visit the same as you would going to a bar - go with no expectations of anything "happening" - make sure to dress to impress, take a tour of the club and ask questions and listen to the etiquette/rules and you won't go far wrong " | |||
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" Depressing because I've never felt more alone, than when I've been in one of these clubs. The 'warmest of welcomes' usually lasts long enough for you to pay your membership/entrance fee, and once you've had 'The Tour', you're on your own. It's easy to feel like a fish out of water, when you don't know anybody, and you're in unfamiliar surroundings, but when you try to engage with others, and people don't reciprocate, or worse, look away so they don't catch your eye, it's time for a wander, because your bum has gone numb on the bar stool. So wander you do, only now, you've to walk that line between 'nice guy having a look', and 'wank zombie on the prowl', which is what you know you look like, as a single guy wandering the playrooms by yourself. So you find somewhere else to sit down, and wonder if any of the regulars have noticed nobody is talking to the new guy, on his own, looking at his watch, realising he's been in here for two hours now, and Jeez, this is depressing........... You've had a verification from one of my friends at Chams and I know full well she's one of the friendliest people. Are you completely sure you have tried to communicate with people? The regulars at Chams on a Friday are usually a friendly bunch and try to make new people welcome. I always try to make sure I talk to newbies " Yes, Lisa was lovely, and Chams was brilliant! Out of the 5 clubs I've been to, Chams is everything a swing club should be, and what I imagine most people expect it to be However, I did go there as a couple, not as a single male, which were my 4 previous 'experiences', and wholly different. If only I lived closer so I could visit Chams more often | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast Just once, I would love this to be true Are you saying you’ve not had great experiences Exactly this fella I find this really hard to understand as I've got many male friends on the scene and they all do very well in clubs. You should try it from my side lol! You will see from my verifications, that I do pretty well in Fab. I find clubs depressing. Why depressing? Depressing because I've never felt more alone, than when I've been in one of these clubs. The 'warmest of welcomes' usually lasts long enough for you to pay your membership/entrance fee, and once you've had 'The Tour', you're on your own. It's easy to feel like a fish out of water, when you don't know anybody, and you're in unfamiliar surroundings, but when you try to engage with others, and people don't reciprocate, or worse, look away so they don't catch your eye, it's time for a wander, because your bum has gone numb on the bar stool. So wander you do, only now, you've to walk that line between 'nice guy having a look', and 'wank zombie on the prowl', which is what you know you look like, as a single guy wandering the playrooms by yourself. So you find somewhere else to sit down, and wonder if any of the regulars have noticed nobody is talking to the new guy, on his own, looking at his watch, realising he's been in here for two hours now, and Jeez, this is depressing..........." Do you not attempt to converse with people around the club etc or do you just sit there watching the world go by. Again never had any problems in clubs and 99.9% of the time everyone’s friendly and conversant. Come along to my swingles event at xtasia on the 16th and i’ll even introduce you to people if you’d like | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast Just once, I would love this to be true Are you saying you’ve not had great experiences Exactly this fella I find this really hard to understand as I've got many male friends on the scene and they all do very well in clubs. You should try it from my side lol! You will see from my verifications, that I do pretty well in Fab. I find clubs depressing. Why depressing? Depressing because I've never felt more alone, than when I've been in one of these clubs. The 'warmest of welcomes' usually lasts long enough for you to pay your membership/entrance fee, and once you've had 'The Tour', you're on your own. It's easy to feel like a fish out of water, when you don't know anybody, and you're in unfamiliar surroundings, but when you try to engage with others, and people don't reciprocate, or worse, look away so they don't catch your eye, it's time for a wander, because your bum has gone numb on the bar stool. So wander you do, only now, you've to walk that line between 'nice guy having a look', and 'wank zombie on the prowl', which is what you know you look like, as a single guy wandering the playrooms by yourself. So you find somewhere else to sit down, and wonder if any of the regulars have noticed nobody is talking to the new guy, on his own, looking at his watch, realising he's been in here for two hours now, and Jeez, this is depressing........... Do you not attempt to converse with people around the club etc or do you just sit there watching the world go by. Again never had any problems in clubs and 99.9% of the time everyone’s friendly and conversant. Come along to my swingles event at xtasia on the 16th and i’ll even introduce you to people if you’d like " Excellent idea Mark! (first and last time you'll probably hear that from me ). The swingles event is perfect for a single male as everyone there is looking for singles lol. | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Get your self to a club mate you will have a blast Just once, I would love this to be true Are you saying you’ve not had great experiences Exactly this fella I find this really hard to understand as I've got many male friends on the scene and they all do very well in clubs. You should try it from my side lol! You will see from my verifications, that I do pretty well in Fab. I find clubs depressing. Why depressing? Depressing because I've never felt more alone, than when I've been in one of these clubs. The 'warmest of welcomes' usually lasts long enough for you to pay your membership/entrance fee, and once you've had 'The Tour', you're on your own. It's easy to feel like a fish out of water, when you don't know anybody, and you're in unfamiliar surroundings, but when you try to engage with others, and people don't reciprocate, or worse, look away so they don't catch your eye, it's time for a wander, because your bum has gone numb on the bar stool. So wander you do, only now, you've to walk that line between 'nice guy having a look', and 'wank zombie on the prowl', which is what you know you look like, as a single guy wandering the playrooms by yourself. So you find somewhere else to sit down, and wonder if any of the regulars have noticed nobody is talking to the new guy, on his own, looking at his watch, realising he's been in here for two hours now, and Jeez, this is depressing........... Do you not attempt to converse with people around the club etc or do you just sit there watching the world go by. Again never had any problems in clubs and 99.9% of the time everyone’s friendly and conversant. Come along to my swingles event at xtasia on the 16th and i’ll even introduce you to people if you’d like " To be fair Mark, I was recently in a Midlands club, and sat at the bar chatting with two other single guys, also their first time in a club. It wasn't the busiest of nights people wise; 5 couples and around 30 single guys, but we passed the time chatting among ourselves. I had a couple of wanders around the play areas, but there was hardly anyone about there, everyone was gathered downstairs. The music was playing too loudly, making it difficult to talk, so I left, disappointed after quite a few months of forward planning to get there. I thank you for your invitation too, if I lived closer I would've taken you up on your kind offer | |||
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"Also thanks from me, pretty much answered all the questions that I had and more! Now I just need to pick the right club and go in for the plunge!" Xtasia swingles night every third friday of the month. Perfect for singles | |||
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"Also thanks from me, pretty much answered all the questions that I had and more! Now I just need to pick the right club and go in for the plunge! Xtasia swingles night every third friday of the month. Perfect for singles " Always a great night and there's gonna be a lot of kissing going on at this one | |||
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"Also thanks from me, pretty much answered all the questions that I had and more! Now I just need to pick the right club and go in for the plunge! Xtasia swingles night every third friday of the month. Perfect for singles Always a great night and there's gonna be a lot of kissing going on at this one " I'll echo what others have said and hope that you make it to one of our Swingles events soon. | |||
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"Never been to a club so don't know what the vibe is around single guys. I'm guessing they are welcomed as what I've read about clubs is all very positive. However, is it normally a case of people sticking together or once you get chatting and invited to have some fun then it all just flows from there? Looking to go to one but just want to understand a bit more first Thanks x" I'd leave it till you make friends with someone willing to go with you.. unless you like hanging around with blokes willing to try walk all over you to get what they want. Or you're desperate.. but each to their own. | |||
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" I'd leave it till you make friends with someone willing to go with you.. unless you like hanging around with blokes willing to try walk all over you to get what they want. Or you're desperate.. but each to their own." i'm sorry... but if you go around with that type of negative outlook then i will tell you something... negativity breeds negativity.... what you do on a night in a club, has not bearing on what i am going to! heck you can sit back and whinge about everyone else.... i'll go round chatting to people! you can sit and the bar, look at the world go by, and wait.... I'll go round chatting to people! you can wait and be reactive.... I'll go round putting my best foot forward and go round chatting to people!!!! notice the difference between being negative and being positive???? | |||
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" I'd leave it till you make friends with someone willing to go with you.. unless you like hanging around with blokes willing to try walk all over you to get what they want. Or you're desperate.. but each to their own. i'm sorry... but if you go around with that type of negative outlook then i will tell you something... negativity breeds negativity.... what you do on a night in a club, has not bearing on what i am going to! heck you can sit back and whinge about everyone else.... i'll go round chatting to people! you can sit and the bar, look at the world go by, and wait.... I'll go round chatting to people! you can wait and be reactive.... I'll go round putting my best foot forward and go round chatting to people!!!! notice the difference between being negative and being positive????" Well said my friend | |||
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" I'd leave it till you make friends with someone willing to go with you.. unless you like hanging around with blokes willing to try walk all over you to get what they want. Or you're desperate.. but each to their own. i'm sorry... but if you go around with that type of negative outlook then i will tell you something... negativity breeds negativity.... what you do on a night in a club, has not bearing on what i am going to! heck you can sit back and whinge about everyone else.... i'll go round chatting to people! you can sit and the bar, look at the world go by, and wait.... I'll go round chatting to people! you can wait and be reactive.... I'll go round putting my best foot forward and go round chatting to people!!!! notice the difference between being negative and being positive????" I'm sorry but you've told me nothing.. and you're presuming a lot based on a couple of posts you've read. You assume I sat back and said nothing. I'm quite outgoing, confident and positive. The OP asked for opinions, I gave mine. Just because you enjoy club life and I don't.. it doesn't make me a negative person. Thats two posts on this you've attempted to correct me on.. Don't climb on my back to get attention. You may end up looking like Mr. Negative yourself. If you were expecting anything other than a nice response to your "Advice" Then my advice to you is not to presume so often. | |||
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" I'd leave it till you make friends with someone willing to go with you.. unless you like hanging around with blokes willing to try walk all over you to get what they want. Or you're desperate.. but each to their own. i'm sorry... but if you go around with that type of negative outlook then i will tell you something... negativity breeds negativity.... what you do on a night in a club, has not bearing on what i am going to! heck you can sit back and whinge about everyone else.... i'll go round chatting to people! you can sit and the bar, look at the world go by, and wait.... I'll go round chatting to people! you can wait and be reactive.... I'll go round putting my best foot forward and go round chatting to people!!!! notice the difference between being negative and being positive???? I'm sorry but you've told me nothing.. and you're presuming a lot based on a couple of posts you've read. You assume I sat back and said nothing. I'm quite outgoing, confident and positive. The OP asked for opinions, I gave mine. Just because you enjoy club life and I don't.. it doesn't make me a negative person. Thats two posts on this you've attempted to correct me on.. Don't climb on my back to get attention. You may end up looking like Mr. Negative yourself. If you were expecting anything other than a nice response to your "Advice" Then my advice to you is not to presume so often." and i would say to you to not presume to know me either.... so how about practicing what you are preaching! you want to be negative... fine, you don't want to go to clubs again... fine, but don't base all your opinions based on just the one visit! different clubs, different nights, different experiences!!! i don't need to jump on anyone's back to help me... i help me!... the only person that affect me is me!, the only people who increases or decreases my meets is me! | |||
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" I'd leave it till you make friends with someone willing to go with you.. unless you like hanging around with blokes willing to try walk all over you to get what they want. Or you're desperate.. but each to their own. i'm sorry... but if you go around with that type of negative outlook then i will tell you something... negativity breeds negativity.... what you do on a night in a club, has not bearing on what i am going to! heck you can sit back and whinge about everyone else.... i'll go round chatting to people! you can sit and the bar, look at the world go by, and wait.... I'll go round chatting to people! you can wait and be reactive.... I'll go round putting my best foot forward and go round chatting to people!!!! notice the difference between being negative and being positive???? I'm sorry but you've told me nothing.. and you're presuming a lot based on a couple of posts you've read. You assume I sat back and said nothing. I'm quite outgoing, confident and positive. The OP asked for opinions, I gave mine. Just because you enjoy club life and I don't.. it doesn't make me a negative person. Thats two posts on this you've attempted to correct me on.. Don't climb on my back to get attention. You may end up looking like Mr. Negative yourself. If you were expecting anything other than a nice response to your "Advice" Then my advice to you is not to presume so often. and i would say to you to not presume to know me either.... so how about practicing what you are preaching! you want to be negative... fine, you don't want to go to clubs again... fine, but don't base all your opinions based on just the one visit! different clubs, different nights, different experiences!!! i don't need to jump on anyone's back to help me... i help me!... the only person that affect me is me!, the only people who increases or decreases my meets is me! " You make some good points and we share the same outlook believe it or not. I have only been once, so have limited experience. Until I go again with someone, that's the only experience I've got to go on. It wasn't all negative by any means, but cost vs potential doesn't weigh up for me personally.. and I was expressing my personal opinion. As for the back climbing, I'll take that back, as you don't strike me as the kind of person who needs to do it, given what you just said. I'm not a negative or shy person though and your assumption that I was, got my back up.. I let it slide the first time. Both learnt a lesson perhaps? | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward " Well to be fair I’d strongly urge any single male to stay away from the the scene in general not it’s not about swingers clubs per se. If you’re under 40 and well calibrated stick to the vanilla scene and there’s a lot of gorgeous women out there - ok maybe occasionally it takes a bit more effort but it’s worth it and you’ll have lots of self respect and pride as well. Good luck with it anyway. | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Not a hypocrite - just my honest opinion and like I’ve already said and as I say to all my vanilla single male friends - stay far away from this scene! Now for couples I think it’s awesome and strongly recommend! i was going to say i hope he was being sarcastic.... otherwise his veri's from all the different clubs he has been to is going to make him look like a bit of a hypocrite.... " | |||
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"I wouldn't recommend it. Swinging is principally a couples scene and single guys can be treated appallingly. If your a single horny male my advice is to go to bars and clubs and chat and pull the girls there. Ridiculous single guys are more than welcome in clubs if they conduct their self properly . If you really want to swing it's the way forward Not a hypocrite - just my honest opinion and like I’ve already said and as I say to all my vanilla single male friends - stay far away from this scene! Now for couples I think it’s awesome and strongly recommend! i was going to say i hope he was being sarcastic.... otherwise his veri's from all the different clubs he has been to is going to make him look like a bit of a hypocrite.... " but you are a single man.... and you are not practicing what you are preaching on others to do.... so, whether you like it or not, you are being a bit of a hypocrite.... | |||
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"Clubs are not for me I have met an amazing couple by having patience and having a relaxed attitude. So any single guys do not get down hearted thinking never going to meet some nice people on here as one day you will send a message and get a reply and may lead to every thing you were hoping for." Exactly this I've been to four different clubs as a single guy, and always left each one thinking I must have been missing something, like doing a download for the latest software on your 'phone, but there was no 'Install' tab to click? I have however, met lots of great people through private meets in here, and continue to see a small circle of reliable friends. In all aspects of life, what works for some, doesn't necessarily work for all, but variety is the spice of life, and it's nice to try new things Apart from male-male sexual contact | |||
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"Never been to a club so don't know what the vibe is around single guys. I'm guessing they are welcomed as what I've read about clubs is all very positive. However, is it normally a case of people sticking together or once you get chatting and invited to have some fun then it all just flows from there? Looking to go to one but just want to understand a bit more first Thanks x" My personal recommendation for single guys is to look for a smaller, more compact club, it's easier to start a conversation than somewhere where everyone's more spread out and avoid clubs going for a night club feel with loud music. Hot tubs are usually an easier place to strike up a conversation too. | |||
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"Never been to a club so don't know what the vibe is around single guys. I'm guessing they are welcomed as what I've read about clubs is all very positive. However, is it normally a case of people sticking together or once you get chatting and invited to have some fun then it all just flows from there? Looking to go to one but just want to understand a bit more first Thanks x My personal recommendation for single guys is to look for a smaller, more compact club, it's easier to start a conversation than somewhere where everyone's more spread out and avoid clubs going for a night club feel with loud music. Hot tubs are usually an easier place to strike up a conversation too." There are usually quiet areas in these Clubs where you can chat and get to know people. | |||
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