FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swinging Support and Advice

Why do people play so many games?

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *an Holo-Man
over a year ago

Yorkshire Dales

I'd say don't take it personal, I mean it might suck but taking it personal seems unnecessary.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Never take it personal, I take this site with a pinch of salt

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it make you feel better happened to me recently. 3 times in a row. Hotels booked everytime. Problem is some of these women are getting 100 plus messages a day. Probability is there is a better offer.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

I never did meal's on a meet just a drink/coffee. Oh actually that's a lie,but the meal was only because the meet's were going well and went on a while.

Yeah scrap that,I did however go half's unless he insisted otherwise.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think that's spot on. If they want to meet will do it not endless messaging and pic swapping forget it. Move on like you say.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can now see the attraction of a club as it saves all this bollocks really.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This happens to us women too!

Unfortunately it seems there are time wasters out there. And it is disheartening

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

Some people play games in all areas of life, not just fab. It happens to us all at some point.

I'm interested that you think some women just want a free meal. Do you expect something in return or are they just refusing to split the bill?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

"

I wouldn't necessarily take his advice!

*Socials are important for many women to feel comfortable and safe with strangers. However I wouldn't be buying them meals. I won't even let a social meet buy me a coffee!

*people have many commitments and responsibilities in the real world, not everyone can meet at the drop of a hat. Expecting women to meet within a fortnight can be unrealistic. For example my ex works offshore so I can have 3 weeks without a babysitter. If someone insisted I should be able to meet within two weeks they'd get the boot for being pushy and impatient.

As for verifications while you chat this is swinging! Just because they are talking/planning to meet you doesn't mean they shouldn't meet someone else! There are an abundance of reasons why they could meet him and not You!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

I wouldn't necessarily take his advice!

*Socials are important for many women to feel comfortable and safe with strangers. However I wouldn't be buying them meals. I won't even let a social meet buy me a coffee!

*people have many commitments and responsibilities in the real world, not everyone can meet at the drop of a hat. Expecting women to meet within a fortnight can be unrealistic. For example my ex works offshore so I can have 3 weeks without a babysitter. If someone insisted I should be able to meet within two weeks they'd get the boot for being pushy and impatient.

As for verifications while you chat this is swinging! Just because they are talking/planning to meet you doesn't mean they shouldn't meet someone else! There are an abundance of reasons why they could meet him and not You! "

This.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

I wouldn't necessarily take his advice!

*Socials are important for many women to feel comfortable and safe with strangers. However I wouldn't be buying them meals. I won't even let a social meet buy me a coffee!

*people have many commitments and responsibilities in the real world, not everyone can meet at the drop of a hat. Expecting women to meet within a fortnight can be unrealistic. For example my ex works offshore so I can have 3 weeks without a babysitter. If someone insisted I should be able to meet within two weeks they'd get the boot for being pushy and impatient.

As for verifications while you chat this is swinging! Just because they are talking/planning to meet you doesn't mean they shouldn't meet someone else! There are an abundance of reasons why they could meet him and not You! "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never offer a meal as a social.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inful xWoman
over a year ago

In a sleepy little village


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

Op so you were chatting to 2 people and that's ok but they aren't allowed to chat to others too ? It's a swinging site after all so you can't expect to be the only one they are chatting too.

As for arranging meets /socials I have a strict 2 wk rule as to avoid weeks of chat to never meet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inful xWoman
over a year ago

In a sleepy little village


"Never offer a meal as a social."

I was offered a 3 course dinner , wine and a night at the theatre earlier today. All I could think of was what a waste of good fucking time

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I think some people misunderstood the post lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"I think some people misunderstood the post lol"

How so?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's been my experience that you need to meet as soon as possible or the friend zone takes over.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

I wouldn't necessarily take his advice!

*Socials are important for many women to feel comfortable and safe with strangers. However I wouldn't be buying them meals. I won't even let a social meet buy me a coffee!

*people have many commitments and responsibilities in the real world, not everyone can meet at the drop of a hat. Expecting women to meet within a fortnight can be unrealistic. For example my ex works offshore so I can have 3 weeks without a babysitter. If someone insisted I should be able to meet within two weeks they'd get the boot for being pushy and impatient.

As for verifications while you chat this is swinging! Just because they are talking/planning to meet you doesn't mean they shouldn't meet someone else! There are an abundance of reasons why they could meet him and not You! "

Off-topic but wow nice ass

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Social should be for a beer or a coffee....not food really .that's more like a date.

If your meeting socially to take things further book the hotel on line at the social ...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Social should be for a beer or a coffee....not food really .that's more like a date.

If your meeting socially to take things further book the hotel on line at the social ..."

I think socials should be whatever the people arranging them want them to be. If all agree that a meal would be nice why is that bad?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

Happens to everyone at some point. Not a nice feeling, but best not to dwell on it or take it personally.

Here is one example of my experience on this:

Was chatting to a woman and everything seemed to be going well... we appeared to be a good match, but she said she was extremely busy so our communication slowed down and our attempts to meet were not convenient.

Guess what...

Verification pops up saying she spent two days with a guy!

At least she told the truth because she was 'extremely busy'

Here is the thing though...

She kept on saying I was the 'perfect' guy for her. Apparently I ticked all the boxes so I don't know if she was playing a game or got a better option as you put it OP.

#confused

I don't mind if people meet others as long as they are happy and having fun that is all that matters. I just need honesty. It's the deception that puts me off.

I find it difficult to trust after that and give second chances so to protect myself I move on.

I always look for the good in everyone until their words don't match their actions.

Actions speak louder than words and all that

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This happens to us women too!

Unfortunately it seems there are time wasters out there. And it is disheartening "

Least you get the offers to choose from try creating a mans profile and see how it works x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Exactly this, all anyone wants is for others to be open and honest.

Play with who you want, just be straight, upfront and don’t string me along then mess me abouy.


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option

Happens to everyone at some point. Not a nice feeling, but best not to dwell on it or take it personally.

Here is one example of my experience on this:

Was chatting to a woman and everything seemed to be going well... we appeared to be a good match, but she said she was extremely busy so our communication slowed down and our attempts to meet were not convenient.

Guess what...

Verification pops up saying she spent two days with a guy!

At least she told the truth because she was 'extremely busy'

Here is the thing though...

She kept on saying I was the 'perfect' guy for her. Apparently I ticked all the boxes so I don't know if she was playing a game or got a better option as you put it OP.

#confused

I don't mind if people meet others as long as they are happy and having fun that is all that matters. I just need honesty. It's the deception that puts me off.

I find it difficult to trust after that and give second chances so to protect myself I move on.

I always look for the good in everyone until their words don't match their actions.

Actions speak louder than words and all that "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eanut Butter CupWoman
over a year ago

B & M Bargains


"here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

"

Rubbish. If I was meeting for a social it would be a quick drink with a view to playing after if we got along.

And 2 weeks?! my life doesn't revolve around fab. I make the effort to meet people who I have a spark with, but I'm not gonna fill every spare minute I have meeting people off here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

Rubbish. If I was meeting for a social it would be a quick drink with a view to playing after if we got along.

And 2 weeks?! my life doesn't revolve around fab. I make the effort to meet people who I have a spark with, but I'm not gonna fill every spare minute I have meeting people off here."

I've spoken for months before meeting. It's rare I'll meet anyone within two weeks. Not even for a social meet.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

I'd sooner buy my own meal rather than spend hours/weeks talking to someone online who then probably will bail out at the last minute!

Seriously, I am here for sexual adventures, not for a free pizza or burger

A drink or a coffee date is way better for a social meet anyways I think.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been offered meals but it doesn't appeal to me. The only socials I do are coffee meets. I would agree if after 2 weeks no meet, I,m not into chat, I just like enough chat to size a man up XXX

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is always someone more shiny out there ! There is no loyalty these days. I honestly can't wait for the rise of the sex robots !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lan157Man
over a year ago

a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex

I like to have a social meet with a potential playmate. It gives both of us a chance to assess the other which messaging alone does not give.Thete are indicators that you are going to be messed about and the two week rule for a social is a good one but I use 3 weeks and I have gone longer but don't expect to much contact in tbe interim. As for socials looking like a date then that's fine by me.It's all part of my social life.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rNaughtyNickMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

I play naked twister does that count ? X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/11/17 06:46:46]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We probably break a lot of men's rules. Our meets will probably be organised about 3 to 4 weeks ahead, simply because I have to wait for my mother to have the children for the night. Would normally chat on Whatsapp in the meantime. Our meets are quite 'date' like, but what's wrong with that? This has on occasion included eating out, but thats no different from something one might do with a vanilla friend of a family member. Since when has eating out become something one only does on a proper date? Oh yeah and we also have our playmates over to our house and we'll cook for them. Why? Because we treat our playmates like friends. However, the plus side is that we never ever cancel. We never ever pass anyone over for a better offer. And we'll play on the first meet if practical.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This happens to us women too!

Unfortunately it seems there are time wasters out there. And it is disheartening "

This! I've had it happen to me plenty of times..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess when I'm meeting I'd be viewed by many as playing games or a time waster. It takes me a very long time to suss someone out via messaging and chatting... way longer than the 2 weeks suggested above. And certainly while I'm in the early stages of getting to know one guy, I may meet someone else. If I do then you can guarantee I've been chatting to them way longer... often months before agreeing to meet them. I don't think that means I'm here to play games. I just do things way differently. Having said that, I'm always upfront about the way I do things so when chatting to anyone new they have the option not to bother.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aenMan
over a year ago

Here and There

I engage in all of this with no expectations, then anything that happens is a pleasant surprise

If it's just chat, hey ho. For a first meet I'd aim for a coffee, that way if either of you aren't in to the other it's not a major time commitment and you can both leave it at that.

In my limited experience, some ladies are happy to meet relatively quickly, others are more hesitant. I guess it's down to personality.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP I see you added to your profile that you will move on if a social hasn't taken place within 2 weeks. I'm curious as to whether you would be understanding if someone said to you that they wouldn't have a child free night for 4 weeks, but they were willing to get that date in the diary as a definite? Or if someone said 'next weekend I'm on holiday and the following weekend I'm going to a wedding, but any weekend after that I'm all yours' would you pass them by?

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *KMaxMan
over a year ago

Bristol


"OP I see you added to your profile that you will move on if a social hasn't taken place within 2 weeks. I'm curious as to whether you would be understanding if someone said to you that they wouldn't have a child free night for 4 weeks, but they were willing to get that date in the diary as a definite? Or if someone said 'next weekend I'm on holiday and the following weekend I'm going to a wedding, but any weekend after that I'm all yours' would you pass them by?

Mrs"

Deadlines are so sexy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

It's just the way it goes. For cpls and single women it's all about ego boosting. Don't take it personally x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think it's just human nature I'm afraid. Try not to be disheartened. There still seems to be loads of genuine folk on here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman
over a year ago

stourbridge area

Chatting for a while is good

We are all here for different reasons ..

Some people just want notches on the bed post

Others want to take it slower

I always request a a social

On neutral ground .....but normally after a couple of weeks of chatting ....so you get an idea of their personality .I wont go to a hotel or invite someone to mine .....im very cautious ....dont give up OP .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

did they meet them on dates you were discussing for your meets? or are they just meeting others who can fit in with their free time?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best way, in my experience, to get rid of the game players/timewasters is to ask for a phone chat as soon as you can.

Genuine people will have no problem with a chat. Everyone else always has an excuse.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

As for verifications while you chat this is swinging! Just because they are talking/planning to meet you doesn't mean they shouldn't meet someone else! There are an abundance of reasons why they could meet him and not You! "

yep...we've got a couple of guys locally we've been talking to but life has been madness so unable to arrange any free time...in the time we've been messaging, we've put up numerous verifications from meets that have been arranged for months. We have to do that because our lives are massively full, nit because we're playing games and I imagine many others are in the same position

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally

A social is a drink and a grt to know u not a date

So a few hours at tops get to know u, unless goes to a play meet some of mine do

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/11/17 08:28:04]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and some play games as they get off it on it

sad i know

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The best way, in my experience, to get rid of the game players/timewasters is to ask for a phone chat as soon as you can.

Genuine people will have no problem with a chat. Everyone else always has an excuse."

Not necessarily true. I would always turn a phone chat down as I’m shy, a little phone phobic and worry about how it would go. Doesn’t mean I’m not genuine, just lacking confidence

L x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All a phone call does is prove that someone answers a call. It doesn't mean they will meet.

As for the 2 week rule, that is me out. My availiability is such that I have to plan months in advance.

Bottom line?

Don't worry about what other people are up to. If they get a meet or are verified whilst waiting to meet you, it is their business. They could have been building up to that meet for months.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ozy couple d lCouple
over a year ago

DROMORE


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

a meal?? they would be lucky if we brought them a coffee

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ozy couple d lCouple
over a year ago

DROMORE


"I guess when I'm meeting I'd be viewed by many as playing games or a time waster. It takes me a very long time to suss someone out via messaging and chatting... way longer than the 2 weeks suggested above. And certainly while I'm in the early stages of getting to know one guy, I may meet someone else. If I do then you can guarantee I've been chatting to them way longer... often months before agreeing to meet them. I don't think that means I'm here to play games. I just do things way differently. Having said that, I'm always upfront about the way I do things so when chatting to anyone new they have the option not to bother. "
your the same as us loiuse chats to couples and men for weeks even months before we go any further then its a coffee then if that goes ok its either plan a date for playing or straight after the coffee

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"Can now see the attraction of a club as it saves all this bollocks really. "

Don’t view clubs as ‘The Answer’ mate, as they are a completely different ballgame, with their own rules, mindset, eggshell-walking, and frustrations. Learn to use the block button, and strip out anyone who doesn’t match what you are looking for, or who you don’t match what they are looking for. Then, you narrow your field to actual POTENTIALS, so you concentrate on people you are more likely to be successful with. If they start messing you around, so you’re getting nowhere, block and move on. Don’t get wound up, just be brutal, you’ll forget them in a day or two, and give someone else your full attention. Good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

"

I have to disagree.

The majority of my meets have been through a social. That's usually a coffee or soft drink as I tend to drive. I wouldn't organise a meal for a social. That's not to say it couldn't evolve into that.

Two weeks and you move on? Well then you must be extremely popular and have loads of offers! I have met inside two weeks, on occasion same day, but the majority have taken place over many messages, weeks, months even years on occasion. I guess it depends on your outlook. If it works for you, then why change it.

Op, I've seen posts on this before in the forums, don't take it personally, learn from it and have no expectations. That way you will never be disappointed.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hamboy69Man
over a year ago

huddersfield

Just cut out the crap and meet at a club or Social night.

What can possibly be achieved by ping pong messaging for three or four weeks these sort of people just want their egos massaging.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its happened to me quite a bit as well ! Its the reason I only meet first time at clubs unless someone is heavily verified and known to my mates, then I'll take the risk.

Once met at a club, if an attraction and connection is there then a meet can be arranged with a reasonable amount of confidence xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hamboy69Man
over a year ago

huddersfield

Absolutely I recently visited a club for an arranged meet with a couple but ended up not playing it just didn't seem to click but as a result of being there I met another couple who are not even on the sight and had a fantastic time.All being well meeting up again this weekend

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally we can't stand all the tennis chat,too many times it leads to nothing, prefer to just arrange a meet and then chat when there, this isn't a dating site

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally we can't stand all the tennis chat,too many times it leads to nothing, prefer to just arrange a meet and then chat when there, this isn't a dating site "

and some like their meets to be dates, not me but does happen

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally we can't stand all the tennis chat,too many times it leads to nothing, prefer to just arrange a meet and then chat when there, this isn't a dating site

and some like their meets to be dates, not me but does happen"

Well they should join match.com then

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally we can't stand all the tennis chat,too many times it leads to nothing, prefer to just arrange a meet and then chat when there, this isn't a dating site

and some like their meets to be dates, not me but does happen

Well they should join match.com then "

yeah i have said that to people before now on a reply to message and been reported lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *dores blackmenWoman
over a year ago

incognito mode ;-)

Some woman/men have busy life's,work,family etc it's not always possible to meet within 2 weeks,you have had a couple of woman you found wasted your time not everyone does

I for example am only free on a Saturday night when the ex has my child overnight,saying that I have plans every weekend,next free 23rd December but that depends what party/club night comes up

Also there are alot of ladies like me who only meet new people at parties/clubs,that's where I found my fb's to meet private

It's not about ego for me,it's about swinging being a fun curricular activity

No hassles

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aughtywifeandhimCouple
over a year ago

bedford

Arrange all meets at club even couples have the same probs as single guys .at least if they cancel or no show .plenty people in club looking for fun ?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally we can't stand all the tennis chat,too many times it leads to nothing, prefer to just arrange a meet and then chat when there, this isn't a dating site

and some like their meets to be dates, not me but does happen"

I think the site is a bit of everything..never looked a match.com sites but I don't think who I am and what I seek would be very successful there.

That said I do like a little more then a quick one off as my interests are built on trust and that requires more then a couple of messages.

So it all depends on what your looking for here...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally we can't stand all the tennis chat,too many times it leads to nothing, prefer to just arrange a meet and then chat when there, this isn't a dating site

and some like their meets to be dates, not me but does happen

Well they should join match.com then "

But match.com is for singles. So if my husband and I want to meet a man and make it a 'date' like experience, it has to be from a swingers site. Even when I meet alone, I would have to lie about marital status, if I were to find dates through match.com.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"The best way, in my experience, to get rid of the game players/timewasters is to ask for a phone chat as soon as you can.

Genuine people will have no problem with a chat. Everyone else always has an excuse.

Not necessarily true. I would always turn a phone chat down as I’m shy, a little phone phobic and worry about how it would go. Doesn’t mean I’m not genuine, just lacking confidence

L x"

Genuine question. If you are too shy to talk on the phone why are you not too shy to meet someone in person. Surely that is more intimidating?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally we can't stand all the tennis chat,too many times it leads to nothing, prefer to just arrange a meet and then chat when there, this isn't a dating site

and some like their meets to be dates, not me but does happen

Well they should join match.com then

But match.com is for singles. So if my husband and I want to meet a man and make it a 'date' like experience, it has to be from a swingers site. Even when I meet alone, I would have to lie about marital status, if I were to find dates through match.com.

Mrs "

and thats it, people use the site how they want to

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hamboy69Man
over a year ago

huddersfield

If it says clearly in your profile that's the case then that's fine and you are on here for your benefit and for others anyone not happy with that can move on.

I've usually found you can only find out about real chemistry face to face and anyone wanting to play message tennis for weeks would bore me stupid.Why waste time on them when there's lots of nice genuine peeps looking for fun.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *revaunanceCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

Your in Milton keynes, so here's some personallised advice. If you are chatting to someone a long distance away, such as Inverness or Cornwall, then it's probably going to be complicated and cost prohibitive to meet for a social. So chat away but bear in mind that it will probably come to nothing.

However, if they are in MK, or nearby towns like Luton or Bedford, then arrange to meet for a coffee, a drink or to feed the ducks if you like. It needn't be expensive, and it shouldn't be too difficult to arrrange. If the other person won't, then move on.

Good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Your in Milton keynes, so here's some personallised advice. If you are chatting to someone a long distance away, such as Inverness or Cornwall, then it's probably going to be complicated and cost prohibitive to meet for a social. So chat away but bear in mind that it will probably come to nothing.

However, if they are in MK, or nearby towns like Luton or Bedford, then arrange to meet for a coffee, a drink or to feed the ducks if you like. It needn't be expensive, and it shouldn't be too difficult to arrrange. If the other person won't, then move on.

Good luck "

good advice

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The best way, in my experience, to get rid of the game players/timewasters is to ask for a phone chat as soon as you can.

Genuine people will have no problem with a chat. Everyone else always has an excuse.

Not necessarily true. I would always turn a phone chat down as I’m shy, a little phone phobic and worry about how it would go. Doesn’t mean I’m not genuine, just lacking confidence

L x

Genuine question. If you are too shy to talk on the phone why are you not too shy to meet someone in person. Surely that is more intimidating? "

It would depend on the person, I sometimes am. Our profile states that messaging beforehand is a must for me, because I need to feel a certain level of comfort before I could meet someone. I always warn people who have asked to meet me in advance that I’m shy and can be a bit awkward, the few I’ve met so far have been happy to take the lead. The thought of lapsing into a silence during a face to face meeting is far less scary to me than doing the same on the phone though. Nobody ever said phobias were rational!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can now see the attraction of a club as it saves all this bollocks really. "
that wont save u either u going to get isolated n neglected like a crap n then u will have a wank on the dark corner done head down time n money wasted god bless America

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hamboy69Man
over a year ago

huddersfield

Not necessarily make some effort and actually speak to people you may be surprised by the outcome.Dont make any effort and follow all the ladies about without speaking and yes you may end up wanking in the corner on your own

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *llNatural36FWoman
over a year ago

Denbighshire


"here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

I wouldn't necessarily take his advice!

*Socials are important for many women to feel comfortable and safe with strangers. However I wouldn't be buying them meals. I won't even let a social meet buy me a coffee!

*people have many commitments and responsibilities in the real world, not everyone can meet at the drop of a hat. Expecting women to meet within a fortnight can be unrealistic. For example my ex works offshore so I can have 3 weeks without a babysitter. If someone insisted I should be able to meet within two weeks they'd get the boot for being pushy and impatient.

As for verifications while you chat this is swinging! Just because they are talking/planning to meet you doesn't mean they shouldn't meet someone else! There are an abundance of reasons why they could meet him and not You! "

Exactly this I have 2 jobs so I do find it difficult to meet at short notice but I turn up to my meets and buy my own drinks/food

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can now see the attraction of a club as it saves all this bollocks really. that wont save u either u going to get isolated n neglected like a crap n then u will have a wank on the dark corner done head down time n money wasted god bless America "

This is garbage. You need to go to clubs with the right attitude

Its no one's responsibility to make you feel welcome, or ensure your money is well spent!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hotographer 30Man
over a year ago

rochdale

[Removed by poster at 01/11/17 13:47:49]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hotographer 30Man
over a year ago

rochdale


"Never offer a meal as a social.

I was offered a 3 course dinner , wine and a night at the theatre earlier today. All I could think of was what a waste of good fucking time "

top gal honest unusual on here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *loppsyWoman
over a year ago

marlow


"Not necessarily make some effort and actually speak to people you may be surprised by the outcome.Dont make any effort and follow all the ladies about without speaking and yes you may end up wanking in the corner on your own"

Exactly

From my experience in clubs it’s the men who make no effort and just expect play end up having a wank alone.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hamboy69Man
over a year ago

huddersfield

Unfortunately that's true for quite a few as I said earlier in the thread if they go and make an effort they might be pleasantly surprised.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not necessarily make some effort and actually speak to people you may be surprised by the outcome.Dont make any effort and follow all the ladies about without speaking and yes you may end up wanking in the corner on your own

Exactly

From my experience in clubs it’s the men who make no effort and just expect play end up having a wank alone. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"Not necessarily make some effort and actually speak to people you may be surprised by the outcome.Dont make any effort and follow all the ladies about without speaking and yes you may end up wanking in the corner on your own

Exactly

From my experience in clubs it’s the men who make no effort and just expect play end up having a wank alone. "

My experience in clubs has been being ignored and avoided, like a leper, with people turning their heads as they see you trying to catch their eye, or walking in their direction, and the look of 'just another single guy hoping to empty his sack' on their faces

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Some of the replies have me in hysterics! I don’t take this site too seriously, I will be considering my first club though

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can now see the attraction of a club as it saves all this bollocks really. that wont save u either u going to get isolated n neglected like a crap n then u will have a wank on the dark corner done head down time n money wasted god bless America

This is garbage. You need to go to clubs with the right attitude

Its no one's responsibility to make you feel welcome, or ensure your money is well spent!"

what's the right attitude mum?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If it make you feel better happened to me recently. 3 times in a row. Hotels booked everytime. Problem is some of these women are getting 100 plus messages a day. Probability is there is a better offer. "

Still no excuse for doing that - at least have the bollocks to tell you - and the men who do it to women too

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ll 4 herCouple
over a year ago

Bury/Bolton


"here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

"

We only get out once a month due to childcare and work.

I guess under your rules as we were out at the weekend and won't be out until the end of the November we wouldn't be able to meet with you then?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option

Happens to everyone at some point. Not a nice feeling, but best not to dwell on it or take it personally.

Here is one example of my experience on this:

Was chatting to a woman and everything seemed to be going well... we appeared to be a good match, but she said she was extremely busy so our communication slowed down and our attempts to meet were not convenient.

Guess what...

Verification pops up saying she spent two days with a guy!

At least she told the truth because she was 'extremely busy'

Here is the thing though...

She kept on saying I was the 'perfect' guy for her. Apparently I ticked all the boxes so I don't know if she was playing a game or got a better option as you put it OP.

#confused

I don't mind if people meet others as long as they are happy and having fun that is all that matters. I just need honesty. It's the deception that puts me off.

I find it difficult to trust after that and give second chances so to protect myself I move on.

I always look for the good in everyone until their words don't match their actions.

Actions speak louder than words and all that "

perhaps she had arranged to meet him before talking to you?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *infulSandyCouple
over a year ago

London


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

You can get free meals on a social!!!???

Where!?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hamboy69Man
over a year ago

huddersfield

Didn't you know that?

Sometimes you might get a shag also

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"here's a lil tips if u are looking for NSA fun

1 don't do social unless it's a clUb it's time waste planning weeks for a meal then chat endless message then forgotten

2 don't talk any one more than 2 weeks if theyou can't meet in side 2 weeks leaves them move on to the next one

"

Some mileage in this. I allow 2 weeks from initial chat to arrange a meet for locals. If they're across the water or further down south then I'll keep it simmering. Sometimes the simmering naturally boils away and that natural filter selection.

If they're interested they'll get back, but don't waste too much time as you'll be missing out someone waiting in the wings.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I guess when I'm meeting I'd be viewed by many as playing games or a time waster. It takes me a very long time to suss someone out via messaging and chatting... way longer than the 2 weeks suggested above. And certainly while I'm in the early stages of getting to know one guy, I may meet someone else. If I do then you can guarantee I've been chatting to them way longer... often months before agreeing to meet them. I don't think that means I'm here to play games. I just do things way differently. Having said that, I'm always upfront about the way I do things so when chatting to anyone new they have the option not to bother. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

There must of been a reason why they suddenly went quiet and met someone else. Maybe, just maybe they had second thoughts and changed their minds

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some of the replies have me in hysterics! I don’t take this site too seriously, I will be considering my first club though "

Well you obviously do take this site extremely seriously. Otherwise why else would you be concerned about someone you're chatting to going quiet followed by them meeting someone else? Go with the flow and if it happens in 2 weeks or 2 months what does it matter? If they go quiet because they go off you what does it matter? Chill and don't take this site so seriously.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hamboy69Man
over a year ago

huddersfield

Hopefully the OP has now got the just of this thread

Basically don't take people on here's word on anything unless you've actually met them.

Get yourself spruced up into a busy club or social

Speak to people politely and you can have some great fun with loads of people and all this while Miss or mrs funny nickers is still finishing her knitting pattern and fantasising about a social meet possibly a month away.

Surely the way to go.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s about choice and the freedom to change minds nobody is exclusive. We all need to understand that chatting and even meeting at any point one person can say no . Not games just freedom of choice, no matter how much time has been invested. I know it’s rough and annoying. Good luck in the future

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can now see the attraction of a club as it saves all this bollocks really. that wont save u either u going to get isolated n neglected like a crap n then u will have a wank on the dark corner done head down time n money wasted god bless America

This is garbage. You need to go to clubs with the right attitude

Its no one's responsibility to make you feel welcome, or ensure your money is well spent!what's the right attitude mum?"

You've advised another forum user that if he goes to clubs, he will be 'neglected' and isolated

On what do you base this advice?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

We couldn't think of anything worse than meeting someone for a meal on a social.

Who wants to play on a full stomach if it gets that far?

Sound like freeloaders to us.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hamboy69Man
over a year ago

huddersfield

Absolutely not I think you may have misread the thread.My comments were a reply to a posters comments whern he stated that if he attended a club he'd be in a dark corner on his own being ignored etc.

I agreed with him that this would be the case if went with a negative attitude and he didn't communicate with people and just spent his time following women about.

However I also said if made an effort he would find he could be pleasantly suprised

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *apillonNoirWoman
over a year ago

There...

I prefer to meet face to face fairly quickly to out those who are ‘armchair’ fabbers. Sometimes however, it’s just not possible - life gets in the way for both parties. Life comes before Fab. Christ, if I used this as my social life I’d start to worry... good luck to those who set 2 week time limits. I hope you’re not missing out on a gem that has other priorities in life.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happens all the time, men do it a lot too, think there is always something better, that’s the fickle world of fab x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hamboy69Man
over a year ago

huddersfield

That last post shows it can happen to anyone so it's not just the OP

But Ive found arranged meets usually happen ok after you've all met in a club.

If someone's willing to meet you half way in a club then that to me shows some commitment.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now I think about it, I think this has happened to us 3 times. I.e. a date was being discussed and then it didn't happen. One dumped us for another couple, another went quiet but our paths have since crossed at a club and from conversations we have since had I suspect he bottled it, the third went quiet and i suspect judging from his verifications that he preferred single ladies. We never saw it that we had been messed about and certainly didn't regard those men as timewasters. We tried to arrange something and they changed their mind with ample notice. Big deal. I'd have a different view if they cancelled at the last minute. Now that we don't tolerate.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Absolutely not I think you may have misread the thread.My comments were a reply to a posters comments whern he stated that if he attended a club he'd be in a dark corner on his own being ignored etc.

I agreed with him that this would be the case if went with a negative attitude and he didn't communicate with people and just spent his time following women about.

However I also said if made an effort he would find he could be pleasantly suprised "

Indeed

You need to press 'reply and quote'

Otherwise no one knows who you are responding to. And confusion ensues

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

the way i am reading this is just because they are talking to you they should only be talking to you?

am i reading that right?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere


"Now I think about it, I think this has happened to us 3 times. I.e. a date was being discussed and then it didn't happen. One dumped us for another couple, another went quiet but our paths have since crossed at a club and from conversations we have since had I suspect he bottled it, the third went quiet and i suspect judging from his verifications that he preferred single ladies. We never saw it that we had been messed about and certainly didn't regard those men as timewasters. We tried to arrange something and they changed their mind with ample notice. Big deal. I'd have a different view if they cancelled at the last minute. Now that we don't tolerate.

Mrs"

Love your thinking

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imonP23Man
over a year ago

Shepton Mallet

Interesting to see the different perspectives on this.

I recently binned a gorgeous 24-year-old hottie (on another site) because after exchanging several messages, she was taking too long to commit to a meeting. She was beyond my usual range (in Taunton), so I already had my doubts about the viability of a relationship with her, but it might have worked out if she had shown a clear intention to actually meet me. It's all about eliminating timewasters. If someone has a legitimate reason why they can't meet very soon, then so be it, but they should at least explain what it is. Otherwise I'd seek to eliminate the frustration of online flirting that just never seems to actually go anywhere. If you like someone, don't string him along, MEET him!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Wrong


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option

the way i am reading this is just because they are talking to you they should only be talking to you?

am i reading that right?"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Had a social meet posted for two days now, the only replies I've had are for different days, meet at my house, car or hotel! Seems that lots whinge about not getting meets but when they are posted try to persuade you to do something different!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

We have only used the Meets / events section for just a social drink and a chat on 3 or 4 ocassions and have always had a meet from it.

Some have been just the social ice breaker and others have led to a second meet.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *onnie and JohnCouple
over a year ago

andover

Hi we use the "who's near app" for same day meets coffee then take it from their.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option

Happens to everyone at some point. Not a nice feeling, but best not to dwell on it or take it personally.

Here is one example of my experience on this:

Was chatting to a woman and everything seemed to be going well... we appeared to be a good match, but she said she was extremely busy so our communication slowed down and our attempts to meet were not convenient.

Guess what...

Verification pops up saying she spent two days with a guy!

At least she told the truth because she was 'extremely busy'

Here is the thing though...

She kept on saying I was the 'perfect' guy for her. Apparently I ticked all the boxes so I don't know if she was playing a game or got a better option as you put it OP.

#confused

I don't mind if people meet others as long as they are happy and having fun that is all that matters. I just need honesty. It's the deception that puts me off.

I find it difficult to trust after that and give second chances so to protect myself I move on.

I always look for the good in everyone until their words don't match their actions.

Actions speak louder than words and all that "

The meet may have been prearranged.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is always someone more shiny out there ! There is no loyalty these days. I honestly can't wait for the rise of the sex robots ! "

Why would you owe loyalty to someone you don't know?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option

It's just the way it goes. For cpls and single women it's all about ego boosting. Don't take it personally x"

Rightio

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Perhaps they like those games. Stick to your own rules.

I prefer to meet for a social within a week of first chatting, to see if we get on in person. Then no time wasted if it didn't work out. It works for me and puts off the people that don't want that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"Had a social meet posted for two days now, the only replies I've had are for different days, meet at my house, car or hotel! Seems that lots whinge about not getting meets but when they are posted try to persuade you to do something different! "

Could’ve been worse; you may have had no replies at all. Which is the only response I’ve ever had when I’ve listed a meet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead

If you work on 99% fake or ego boosters you will find the one that is real and you have great fun with

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Had a social meet posted for two days now, the only replies I've had are for different days, meet at my house, car or hotel! Seems that lots whinge about not getting meets but when they are posted try to persuade you to do something different!

Could’ve been worse; you may have had no replies at all. Which is the only response I’ve ever had when I’ve listed a meet "

been through the meets section too and nothing there either lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"Had a social meet posted for two days now, the only replies I've had are for different days, meet at my house, car or hotel! Seems that lots whinge about not getting meets but when they are posted try to persuade you to do something different!

Could’ve been worse; you may have had no replies at all. Which is the only response I’ve ever had when I’ve listed a meet been through the meets section too and nothing there either lol"

Just pop along to your local club then; always rich pickings for a single woman

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"Had a social meet posted for two days now, the only replies I've had are for different days, meet at my house, car or hotel! Seems that lots whinge about not getting meets but when they are posted try to persuade you to do something different! "

Your location may have something to do with that..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sThunderThighsWoman
over a year ago

Toy Land


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

OP if people meet someone before you . It's maybe just because you are not offering them what they need! There are no rules here! Each to their own ... We have choices .. you play by someone elses rules or you move on and find someone who wants the same as you or is happy to play by your rules!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Was chatting to a woman and everything seemed to be going well... we appeared to be a good match, but she said she was extremely busy so our communication slowed down and our attempts to meet were not convenient.

Guess what...

Verification pops up saying she spent two days with a guy!

At least she told the truth because she was 'extremely busy'

Here is the thing though...

She kept on saying I was the 'perfect' guy for her. Apparently I ticked all the boxes so I don't know if she was playing a game or got a better option as you put it OP.

#confused

I don't mind if people meet others as long as they are happy and having fun that is all that matters. I just need honesty. It's the deception that puts me off.

I find it difficult to trust after that and give second chances so to protect myself I move on.

I always look for the good in everyone until their words don't match their actions.

Actions speak louder than words and all that

The meet may have been prearranged."

Also @MsGivesWood because she gave the same reply.

That could be true, but I am going by the conversations we were having. She kept on saying she knows what she is looking for and I apparently was the man, but she can't meet because she was 'extremely busy' due to personal things going on. We had detailed conversations.

And she had the meet about 6-8 week'ish after we had been communicating. Her verification came up on my friends updates so that just really surprised me. It would have been nice to know she has changed her mind or at least say wants to postpone. Say something, anything is better than silent treatment.

These things happen I suppose. Sometimes people can't be open and honest. For me trust is a big thing no matter what the circumstances are.

Yes we are all strangers when we first engage, but that transition going from online strangers to meeting is based on trust.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Had a social meet posted for two days now, the only replies I've had are for different days, meet at my house, car or hotel! Seems that lots whinge about not getting meets but when they are posted try to persuade you to do something different!

Could’ve been worse; you may have had no replies at all. Which is the only response I’ve ever had when I’ve listed a meet been through the meets section too and nothing there either lol

Just pop along to your local club then; always rich pickings for a single woman "

3 and a half hours drive lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"Had a social meet posted for two days now, the only replies I've had are for different days, meet at my house, car or hotel! Seems that lots whinge about not getting meets but when they are posted try to persuade you to do something different!

Could’ve been worse; you may have had no replies at all. Which is the only response I’ve ever had when I’ve listed a meet been through the meets section too and nothing there either lol

Just pop along to your local club then; always rich pickings for a single woman 3 and a half hours drive lol"

And knowing your sense of direction, that’s a mission too far lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Had a social meet posted for two days now, the only replies I've had are for different days, meet at my house, car or hotel! Seems that lots whinge about not getting meets but when they are posted try to persuade you to do something different!

Your location may have something to do with that..

"

not really they just seem to want instant sex.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Had a social meet posted for two days now, the only replies I've had are for different days, meet at my house, car or hotel! Seems that lots whinge about not getting meets but when they are posted try to persuade you to do something different!

Could’ve been worse; you may have had no replies at all. Which is the only response I’ve ever had when I’ve listed a meet been through the meets section too and nothing there either lol

Just pop along to your local club then; always rich pickings for a single woman "

sounds easy like getting a candy from the shop

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"Had a social meet posted for two days now, the only replies I've had are for different days, meet at my house, car or hotel! Seems that lots whinge about not getting meets but when they are posted try to persuade you to do something different!

Could’ve been worse; you may have had no replies at all. Which is the only response I’ve ever had when I’ve listed a meet been through the meets section too and nothing there either lol

Just pop along to your local club then; always rich pickings for a single woman sounds easy like getting a candy from the shop "

It usually is, in a club, for a single woman

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

My experience in clubs has been being ignored and avoided, like a leper, with people turning their heads as they see you trying to catch their eye, or walking in their direction, and the look of 'just another single guy hoping to empty his sack' on their faces"

No disrespect to you but like us all you are “just another single guy” and if you go to a club is the real underlying reason you are there not to “empty your sack”

Come on, let’s keep it real you don’t go to clubs in the hope of finding a friend or sit chatting about the weather.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"

My experience in clubs has been being ignored and avoided, like a leper, with people turning their heads as they see you trying to catch their eye, or walking in their direction, and the look of 'just another single guy hoping to empty his sack' on their faces

No disrespect to you but like us all you are “just another single guy” and if you go to a club is the real underlying reason you are there not to “empty your sack”

Come on, let’s keep it real you don’t go to clubs in the hope of finding a friend or sit chatting about the weather.

"

I totally agree mate, but all too often single guys are chastised for not trying to get involved, or criticised for not being forward enough, or slated for being too upfront. It's a slog for sure, and no wonder you only see roughly 1 in 10 club reviews from a single guy in the listings. Clubs, in the main, are for couples to meet other couples, the exception being BMFC or Greedy Girl events where single guys are actively sought

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is always someone more shiny out there ! There is no loyalty these days. I honestly can't wait for the rise of the sex robots ! "

Loyalty? It's swinging, the only person I'd be loyal to see a hubby I'd I was married and not swinging. B

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option "

Wgat wrong with that ?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lceeWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Sometimes I think people are here boost their ego or looking to get free meals on a social lol.

I’ve had 2 women talk to me for ages, want to meet, suddenly go quiet then display verifications from someone that they must’ve seen as a better option

Wgat wrong with that ?"

Yeah, I don’t see an issue here. Sometimes you meet someone that you really click with, and the others you’re chatting to just pale a little. It sucks but it’s how it is. And a meal? A MEAL?! I need to up my expectations from a social - it’s usually a drink...that I pay for!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Elcee - im the 1 who normally pays for drinks. I wouldnt expect you to pay if I met u

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The best way, in my experience, to get rid of the game players/timewasters is to ask for a phone chat as soon as you can.

Genuine people will have no problem with a chat. Everyone else always has an excuse."

Im genuine but i wont chat on the phone !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All a phone call does is prove that someone answers a call. It doesn't mean they will meet.

As for the 2 week rule, that is me out. My availiability is such that I have to plan months in advance.

Bottom line?

Don't worry about what other people are up to. If they get a meet or are verified whilst waiting to meet you, it is their business. They could have been building up to that meet for months.

"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top