FabSwingers.com forum: swinging club help needed

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi I went to my local swinging club Friday night the staff were really nice very welcoming. But as the night went on I met few couples and single ladies there we chatted etc . I went for a social to see how it is but wasn't ready to play just yet. So one couple I refused to play with untill nxt time as I told them in here for a social there weren't happy with me , as the male of the couple said I have spoilt his wife birthday as she want to have fun with me. I didn't meet anyone my age I'm 21 but I met some fantastic people there apart from this couple. Start calling me a show off etc only cause I didn't want to play. I wanted your advice on what to do when there is a pushy person in a club

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi I went to my local swinging club Friday night the staff were really nice very welcoming. But as the night went on I met few couples and single ladies there we chatted etc . I went for a social to see how it is but wasn't ready to play just yet. So one couple I refused to play with untill nxt time as I told them in here for a social there weren't happy with me , as the male of the couple said I have spoilt his wife birthday as she want to have fun with me. I didn't meet anyone my age I'm 21 but I met some fantastic people there apart from this couple. Start calling me a show off etc only cause I didn't want to play. I wanted your advice on what to do when there is a pushy person in a club "
you did everything right OP no one should feel pressured into doing anything they don't want to, hope your next experience is better best to avoid people who are pushy or make you feel uncomfortable xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't feel like you ever have to do anything you don't want to , obviously narrow minded couple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a prevalent attitude in clubs, single guys are there to service the ladies, how dare you refuse!! Tut tut, sexual equality doesn't exist to many in clubs, you're expected to be grateful for the offer and take it up, see to the ladies exact needs, forget your own desires and be eternally grateful.....

You did nothing wrong, play with people where there is mutual attraction, simple

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By *ngeluk69Woman
over a year ago

Near enough

Sounds to me like you have the perfect attitude to attending clubs OP. No one should ever feel pressured to play.

The fact that you chose to go and get a feel for the place says a lot more about you than the couple yoh met.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You don't have to play sweetie, and good on you for sticking to your guns.

Hubby was probably sulking because he'd have to fuck her!! Hate pushy people.

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

The op absolutely did the right thing, but is pretty much a WTF moment for a single guy to turn down a woman who offers it on a plate. No doubt the woman in question felt there was something wrong with her and her bloke took it out on the op.

Women are so rarely rejected in the swinging world that they take it to heart when they are. Us blokes get hardened :??

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By *obin_and_marionMan
over a year ago

Beaconsfield

There's no obligation in a club so don't feel bad... Sometimes "not right now maybe later" works, cause they usually just move on to another "target"... But it's not acceptable behaviour on their part

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In terms of advice there's not a lot you can do other than politely stand your ground and walk away. If they continue to pursue it or become nasty then have a word with a member of staff. No should unequivocally mean no and that behaviour isn't acceptable in a club. I hope they didn't detract from the rest of the night too much.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No obligation to play ever. Whoever you are. Politely decline. If they are still pushy that's when I let my inner bitch out and she can be v v nasty.

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By *unforus1965Couple
over a year ago

MIDLANDS

[Removed by poster at 03/09/17 18:59:36]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That sort of couple is one to avoid. You behaved perfectly as a single guy, and you have as much right to say no as any single female or couple does. A first time visit to a club is daunting enough, so it's understandable you were cautious and to find out if it was for you. To be told by the man that you spoilt his wife's birthday shows them up for being self-centred and not appreciating your feelings. You may be like me, preferring single ladies who like to play. Don't be put off by this episode, always follow your own feelings and be polite but assertive. Many couples and singles will appreciate you for that.

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