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"So is it ok for couples to lightly touch other couples to encourage play between them?" It wouldn't bother me if it was light touching in non intimate areas. Like you say, it was over bearing etc and I'm sure they'd get the message if that touch was ignored. A bit of spontaneous play never hurt if agreed | |||
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"So is it ok for couples to lightly touch other couples to encourage play between them?" No the rules should be and are the same no matter who is doing the touching, you ask first. Unfortunately, a lot of females assume that they do not need to ask because of their gender. | |||
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"So is it ok for couples to lightly touch other couples to encourage play between them? No the rules should be and are the same no matter who is doing the touching, you ask first. Unfortunately, a lot of females assume that they do not need to ask because of their gender. " all ways ask 1st | |||
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"I'd be put off by this. I wouldn't want anyone involved without my permission. Same goes for touching. I was in a club and been approached in that way while in a hot tub. I told them to stop as it was unwelcome from them. As shallow as this sounds if I fancied them then it would have been different but you can't really take the chance I don't think " i have seen a lot of this in clubs and they have gone to the staff to sort it out .i always ask 1st and if say no its no | |||
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"If this happened to me I would say no, regardless of whether i fancied them or not. It is rude and disrespectful. I have told men and women to not touch when they do so without asking first. Some of them i would have played with if they approached me properly. Last weekend I was in a club in a viewing area watching a large group playing. One man started touching and was told not to. Another asked first and we had a little play. Manners and respect go a long way in swinging." manners is respect and will go far | |||
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"I'd be put off by this. I wouldn't want anyone involved without my permission. Same goes for touching. I was in a club and been approached in that way while in a hot tub. I told them to stop as it was unwelcome from them. As shallow as this sounds if I fancied them then it would have been different but you can't really take the chance I don't think " But if you fancied them I'm sure as I would do would be to verbally or visually started the interest and see if it's reciprocated. I'm not a big fan of clubs as I had two experiences which left me not interested in returning but I'd want know more about someone before playing. I'm surprised at the number of people who will spontaneously play with someone without knowing anything about them as if being in the clubmakes them ok yet on here the same people wwould makeyou jump through hoops for even a coffee... | |||
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"Urgh, if we're playing and someone (of any gender or orientation) not invited to play touches either of us (anywhere or anyhow) there'd be hell to pay. This is the exact reason we don't play in public areas. And the reason XX will get a ban from clubs There's someone on our block list because of this. Well mainly for afterwards pretending to have been the hero 'saving' XX from the fem she was playing with until he joined in without permission from XX or XY." i would of dune the same as well | |||
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"I'd be put off by this. I wouldn't want anyone involved without my permission. Same goes for touching. I was in a club and been approached in that way while in a hot tub. I told them to stop as it was unwelcome from them. As shallow as this sounds if I fancied them then it would have been different but you can't really take the chance I don't think But if you fancied them I'm sure as I would do would be to verbally or visually started the interest and see if it's reciprocated. I'm not a big fan of clubs as I had two experiences which left me not interested in returning but I'd want know more about someone before playing. I'm surprised at the number of people who will spontaneously play with someone without knowing anything about them as if being in the clubmakes them ok yet on here the same people wwould makeyou jump through hoops for even a coffee... " While I partly agree its nice to know something about people on here, part of the appeal of clubs for me is that anonymity. Its quite liberating for me so I embrace that. | |||
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"Question.... we attended infusions last night and had a great night may I add.... we have always chatted to couples before arranging to play..... last night we noticed a lot of gentle touching on feet/legs etc, trying to attract attention. To cut a long story short we also got touched, by a lady of a couple who tried to attract my hubbys attention by stroking him while she was getting ate out. Turns out she got our attention and we had a great play. My question is, is this the done thing.... is chatting in clubs to arrange play not done as much..... there was no grabbing or anything just gentle touching in non intimate areas to get attention.." me being single I never touch unless given the nod by the couple and I always respect the couple if they want privacy as in tonight at infusion woman was shy and not like being watched | |||
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"we have experienced this on the gangbang areas of both chams and libs. i think the key is the bed or area you are entering is more open and light touches more accepted. Obviously a no thanks in a polite way should disuade unwanted attention. those areas are entered knowing the score in our experience " We like this idea...... sometimes the "in the moment" passion thing works..... but if it's someone you r not attracted to a polite no should be all it takes | |||
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"I think orgy rooms should be treated like school play grounds. You just scream “BUUUUNNNNDDDDLLLLEEEE” from the top of your voice and launch yourself on top of the biggest pile in the room." | |||
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"I think orgy rooms should be treated like school play grounds. You just scream “BUUUUNNNNDDDDLLLLEEEE” from the top of your voice and launch yourself on top of the biggest pile in the room. " PILE ON head first ha ha I am very cautious as a single guy as well and wait to be invited and never go anywhere near a couple playing without the invite but from what i have seen couples or single women will test the water in that way. | |||
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"I'd be put off by this. I wouldn't want anyone involved without my permission. Same goes for touching. I was in a club and been approached in that way while in a hot tub. I told them to stop as it was unwelcome from them. As shallow as this sounds if I fancied them then it would have been different but you can't really take the chance I don't think " I was also in a club with hot tub and chatting to a few guys when the one nearest me starting stroking bottom of my leg. I decided to see how far he would go and he gradually went further up. At this point I suddenly got up and make my excuses that the water was too hot, and left. | |||
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"If we're playing next to others in an orgy room then we'd be ok with a light touch on an arm or a leg to get our attention. In that instance, we'd expect to be able to pay 'no thanks' by just moving that part away from them. Similarly, we could say 'yes we're interested' by staying put and by reciprocating the contact. So long as those reactions are respected then it's good with us Stopping to have a full chat about boundaries would kill the mood and we could test the waters with exploratory contact or pushing away. " That is interesting. I was at an orgy with six couples and basically it was a case of free for all if you stayed in that room and stripped off. You were expected to touch and be touched. It wasn't for me however | |||
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"If we're playing next to others in an orgy room then we'd be ok with a light touch on an arm or a leg to get our attention. In that instance, we'd expect to be able to pay 'no thanks' by just moving that part away from them. Similarly, we could say 'yes we're interested' by staying put and by reciprocating the contact. So long as those reactions are respected then it's good with us Stopping to have a full chat about boundaries would kill the mood and we could test the waters with exploratory contact or pushing away. " Agree with you whole heartedly?? | |||
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"So is it ok for couples to lightly touch other couples to encourage play between them?" Not for me I'm afraid! If you're in the throes of passion - a touch - wherever it is - can be very distracting and completely throw you off your pleasure! If there's a break in play then eye contact, smiles, even a polite request don't go amiss! | |||
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"I'd be put off by this. I wouldn't want anyone involved without my permission. Same goes for touching. I was in a club and been approached in that way while in a hot tub. I told them to stop as it was unwelcome from them. As shallow as this sounds if I fancied them then it would have been different but you can't really take the chance I don't think But if you fancied them I'm sure as I would do would be to verbally or visually started the interest and see if it's reciprocated. I'm not a big fan of clubs as I had two experiences which left me not interested in returning but I'd want know more about someone before playing. I'm surprised at the number of people who will spontaneously play with someone without knowing anything about them as if being in the clubmakes them ok yet on here the same people wwould makeyou jump through hoops for even a coffee... " You'd have a frustrating evening in a club at the United Nations of swinging - Cap D'Agde! As a previous poster said - half the fun of club is the thrill of strangers, especially foreign folk. If we wNt to establish boundaries etc we would have a social beforehand - and anyways, a polite shake of the head invariably produces the desired effect.... | |||
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"The trouble is .... this is so much more than the simple question of what is etiquette. The most important thing is do the people all fancy each other and want to have sex with each other. Typically a physical touch is not ok for me.... but I've been in group situations in clubs where people have joined in with no contact and it's been ok. So as a rule, if I'm solo woman and I want to join I'll find a moment when it seems possible and sidle over a whisper in an ear if it is ok to touch. If no i sidle off again. If I'm with someone I know when others are itching to join ... and generally I give signals to either join or fuck off but if someone just makes eye contact I can beckon them over or not. But there are sooooo many variations that my rule is "ask first" there has to be explicit permission else it's not ok. It doesn't have to be a full on conversation. I've passed a woman fucking a guy and just whispered quietly "please can I kiss you" on her ear and probably no one else even realised I'd said anything. And because I know you're thinking it .... she said yes. V x " But the.problem with an orgy is that everyone on the room plays with everyone. Nobody asks first and if you are in that room you are expected to be playing with anyone who makes a move. That is my experience. In the end it wasn't for.me. | |||
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"If we're playing next to others in an orgy room then we'd be ok with a light touch on an arm or a leg to get our attention. In that instance, we'd expect to be able to pay 'no thanks' by just moving that part away from them. Similarly, we could say 'yes we're interested' by staying put and by reciprocating the contact. So long as those reactions are respected then it's good with us Stopping to have a full chat about boundaries would kill the mood and we could test the waters with exploratory contact or pushing away. " this is the easiest most sensible way we believe | |||
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"The trouble is .... this is so much more than the simple question of what is etiquette. The most important thing is do the people all fancy each other and want to have sex with each other. Typically a physical touch is not ok for me.... but I've been in group situations in clubs where people have joined in with no contact and it's been ok. So as a rule, if I'm solo woman and I want to join I'll find a moment when it seems possible and sidle over a whisper in an ear if it is ok to touch. If no i sidle off again. If I'm with someone I know when others are itching to join ... and generally I give signals to either join or fuck off but if someone just makes eye contact I can beckon them over or not. But there are sooooo many variations that my rule is "ask first" there has to be explicit permission else it's not ok. It doesn't have to be a full on conversation. I've passed a woman fucking a guy and just whispered quietly "please can I kiss you" on her ear and probably no one else even realised I'd said anything. And because I know you're thinking it .... she said yes. V x But the.problem with an orgy is that everyone on the room plays with everyone. Nobody asks first and if you are in that room you are expected to be playing with anyone who makes a move. That is my experience. In the end it wasn't for.me. " Part of the issue here is rhe title of the thread and also how you describe it. In a club, there isn't a 'gangbang room'. There are open rooms where lots of people play, but it isn't a free-for-all gangbang or orgy. Yes, lots of people are playing side by side but there are rules and etiquette to joining in. | |||
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"The trouble is .... this is so much more than the simple question of what is etiquette. The most important thing is do the people all fancy each other and want to have sex with each other. Typically a physical touch is not ok for me.... but I've been in group situations in clubs where people have joined in with no contact and it's been ok. So as a rule, if I'm solo woman and I want to join I'll find a moment when it seems possible and sidle over a whisper in an ear if it is ok to touch. If no i sidle off again. If I'm with someone I know when others are itching to join ... and generally I give signals to either join or fuck off but if someone just makes eye contact I can beckon them over or not. But there are sooooo many variations that my rule is "ask first" there has to be explicit permission else it's not ok. It doesn't have to be a full on conversation. I've passed a woman fucking a guy and just whispered quietly "please can I kiss you" on her ear and probably no one else even realised I'd said anything. And because I know you're thinking it .... she said yes. V x But the.problem with an orgy is that everyone on the room plays with everyone. Nobody asks first and if you are in that room you are expected to be playing with anyone who makes a move. That is my experience. In the end it wasn't for.me. Part of the issue here is rhe title of the thread and also how you describe it. In a club, there isn't a 'gangbang room'. There are open rooms where lots of people play, but it isn't a free-for-all gangbang or orgy. Yes, lots of people are playing side by side but there are rules and etiquette to joining in." Exactly! I've been part of some big pile ups and it's wrong to think that everyone plays with everyone, and there should never be an expectation about fucking others. Sometimes there have been 1 or 2 that weren't my type (perhaps I wasn't theirs either) so I have fun around them. Whatever the situation the basic premise is the same. Unless it's a clear yes, the answer is no. | |||
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"The trouble is .... this is so much more than the simple question of what is etiquette. The most important thing is do the people all fancy each other and want to have sex with each other. Typically a physical touch is not ok for me.... but I've been in group situations in clubs where people have joined in with no contact and it's been ok. So as a rule, if I'm solo woman and I want to join I'll find a moment when it seems possible and sidle over a whisper in an ear if it is ok to touch. If no i sidle off again. If I'm with someone I know when others are itching to join ... and generally I give signals to either join or fuck off but if someone just makes eye contact I can beckon them over or not. But there are sooooo many variations that my rule is "ask first" there has to be explicit permission else it's not ok. It doesn't have to be a full on conversation. I've passed a woman fucking a guy and just whispered quietly "please can I kiss you" on her ear and probably no one else even realised I'd said anything. And because I know you're thinking it .... she said yes. V x But the.problem with an orgy is that everyone on the room plays with everyone. Nobody asks first and if you are in that room you are expected to be playing with anyone who makes a move. That is my experience. In the end it wasn't for.me. " I agree if you are in a orgy that is why you are there to fuck with any one in the room | |||
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"The trouble is .... this is so much more than the simple question of what is etiquette. The most important thing is do the people all fancy each other and want to have sex with each other. Typically a physical touch is not ok for me.... but I've been in group situations in clubs where people have joined in with no contact and it's been ok. So as a rule, if I'm solo woman and I want to join I'll find a moment when it seems possible and sidle over a whisper in an ear if it is ok to touch. If no i sidle off again. If I'm with someone I know when others are itching to join ... and generally I give signals to either join or fuck off but if someone just makes eye contact I can beckon them over or not. But there are sooooo many variations that my rule is "ask first" there has to be explicit permission else it's not ok. It doesn't have to be a full on conversation. I've passed a woman fucking a guy and just whispered quietly "please can I kiss you" on her ear and probably no one else even realised I'd said anything. And because I know you're thinking it .... she said yes. V x But the.problem with an orgy is that everyone on the room plays with everyone. Nobody asks first and if you are in that room you are expected to be playing with anyone who makes a move. That is my experience. In the end it wasn't for.me. I agree if you are in a orgy that is why you are there to fuck with any one in the room " really?? | |||
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"Would it not be better to sort out before hand who is going to be in the gangbang or orgy first,then when you go in the room knowone is allowed in but there is a window or viewing area you can watch from but also there is a area wear all can join in,as some like that" No. They aren't like that. They are just the open play areas in clubs. People play side by side. Sometimes people who have met in the social area will play together, also people will play just as a couple or another group but alongside others. Sometimes people playing side by side will also interact a little or a lot. Closing the room off wouldn't work, as they are an integral part of the club. | |||
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" But the.problem with an orgy is that everyone on the room plays with everyone. Nobody asks first and if you are in that room you are expected to be playing with anyone who makes a move. That is my experience. In the end it wasn't for.me. I agree if you are in a orgy that is why you are there to fuck with any one in the room " No, no no. So wrong. That is not the case at all. | |||
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"If we're playing next to others in an orgy room then we'd be ok with a light touch on an arm or a leg to get our attention. In that instance, we'd expect to be able to pay 'no thanks' by just moving that part away from them. Similarly, we could say 'yes we're interested' by staying put and by reciprocating the contact. So long as those reactions are respected then it's good with us Stopping to have a full chat about boundaries would kill the mood and we could test the waters with exploratory contact or pushing away. " Yes absolutely. I think context and exactly where you are is part of the whole thing. If, for example, someone groped the Mrs or myself (LOL I should be so lucky) at the bar then that would be out of order. However if you are playing in an open orgy room then the light leg or arm touch to get attention would/should be acceptable as long as no (if it is a no) is respected. We actually take it as a non verbal way of asking. The other question would be: How far do you take it? Could anyone imagine having to ask first in a dark room? | |||
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"The trouble is .... this is so much more than the simple question of what is etiquette. The most important thing is do the people all fancy each other and want to have sex with each other. Typically a physical touch is not ok for me.... but I've been in group situations in clubs where people have joined in with no contact and it's been ok. So as a rule, if I'm solo woman and I want to join I'll find a moment when it seems possible and sidle over a whisper in an ear if it is ok to touch. If no i sidle off again. If I'm with someone I know when others are itching to join ... and generally I give signals to either join or fuck off but if someone just makes eye contact I can beckon them over or not. But there are sooooo many variations that my rule is "ask first" there has to be explicit permission else it's not ok. It doesn't have to be a full on conversation. I've passed a woman fucking a guy and just whispered quietly "please can I kiss you" on her ear and probably no one else even realised I'd said anything. And because I know you're thinking it .... she said yes. V x But the.problem with an orgy is that everyone on the room plays with everyone. Nobody asks first and if you are in that room you are expected to be playing with anyone who makes a move. That is my experience. In the end it wasn't for.me. I agree if you are in a orgy that is why you are there to fuck with any one in the room " No absolutely NOT. While we would agree that in an open room the light touch would be acceptable, just being in the room is not a licence for anyone to fuck. No still means no. | |||
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"If we're playing next to others in an orgy room then we'd be ok with a light touch on an arm or a leg to get our attention. In that instance, we'd expect to be able to pay 'no thanks' by just moving that part away from them. Similarly, we could say 'yes we're interested' by staying put and by reciprocating the contact. So long as those reactions are respected then it's good with us Stopping to have a full chat about boundaries would kill the mood and we could test the waters with exploratory contact or pushing away. Yes absolutely. I think context and exactly where you are is part of the whole thing. If, for example, someone groped the Mrs or myself (LOL I should be so lucky) at the bar then that would be out of order. However if you are playing in an open orgy room then the light leg or arm touch to get attention would/should be acceptable as long as no (if it is a no) is respected. We actually take it as a non verbal way of asking. The other question would be: How far do you take it? Could anyone imagine having to ask first in a dark room? " I've been asked in a dark room | |||
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"So is it ok for couples to lightly touch other couples to encourage play between them? Not for me I'm afraid! If you're in the throes of passion - a touch - wherever it is - can be very distracting and completely throw you off your pleasure! If there's a break in play then eye contact, smiles, even a polite request don't go amiss! " Concentrate woman! Fuzz | |||
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"I'd be put off by this. I wouldn't want anyone involved without my permission. Same goes for touching. I was in a club and been approached in that way while in a hot tub. I told them to stop as it was unwelcome from them. As shallow as this sounds if I fancied them then it would have been different but you can't really take the chance I don't think But if you fancied them I'm sure as I would do would be to verbally or visually started the interest and see if it's reciprocated. I'm not a big fan of clubs as I had two experiences which left me not interested in returning but I'd want know more about someone before playing. I'm surprised at the number of people who will spontaneously play with someone without knowing anything about them as if being in the clubmakes them ok yet on here the same people wwould makeyou jump through hoops for even a coffee... While I partly agree its nice to know something about people on here, part of the appeal of clubs for me is that anonymity. Its quite liberating for me so I embrace that. " I understand that aspect...bit like the fantasy of meeting a walker in the park or woods... teasing smiles and then ask faf... And pull each other into the bushes, brush off the dirt, straighten the clothes and continue on your way. I guess the point I was making was you don't know who they are or what they are like... yet we make such a big thing on here about the coffee, face pic, veris, location, discretion etc...Then you heat the very same people fuck a complete stranger in a club with no thought of who or what they are. Just seems the absurd extremes of risk and 110% no surprises. | |||
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"If we're playing next to others in an orgy room then we'd be ok with a light touch on an arm or a leg to get our attention. In that instance, we'd expect to be able to pay 'no thanks' by just moving that part away from them. Similarly, we could say 'yes we're interested' by staying put and by reciprocating the contact. So long as those reactions are respected then it's good with us Stopping to have a full chat about boundaries would kill the mood and we could test the waters with exploratory contact or pushing away. " This has always been the standard way to ask permission in the orgy room. It is the only truly respectful way to do so as asking breaks the moment for the lady who is the subject of the attention. | |||
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"If we're playing next to others in an orgy room then we'd be ok with a light touch on an arm or a leg to get our attention. In that instance, we'd expect to be able to pay 'no thanks' by just moving that part away from them. Similarly, we could say 'yes we're interested' by staying put and by reciprocating the contact. So long as those reactions are respected then it's good with us Stopping to have a full chat about boundaries would kill the mood and we could test the waters with exploratory contact or pushing away. Totally agree with this....... This has always been the standard way to ask permission in the orgy room. It is the only truly respectful way to do so as asking breaks the moment for the lady who is the subject of the attention. " | |||
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"It's a gangbang room, I'm my opinion expect to get gang banged as a minimum To many fussy people, share the love or keep to the private areas..." I don't know what clubs you have been to, but that isn't the case anywhere. If you want to do that, you'd be better sticking to a private area or party with people who've pre-agreed to play with you. Assuming you can play with anybody in an open play area is completely wrong, and at best will get you thrown out of the club. | |||
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"It's a gangbang room, I'm my opinion expect to get gang banged as a minimum To many fussy people, share the love or keep to the private areas... I don't know what clubs you have been to, but that isn't the case anywhere. If you want to do that, you'd be better sticking to a private area or party with people who've pre-agreed to play with you. Assuming you can play with anybody in an open play area is completely wrong, and at best will get you thrown out of the club. " Just said it's my opinion not that it is or should be the status quo... I think a slight touch is nicer than being interrupted and out right asked, keeps the flow and simply removing their hand or a quick no thanks will suffice if you're not that interested. I've been in many situations in group sex/gangbang rooms where I've gone for the person next to me and my intentions have been known and gratefully received without having to out right ask. And I've been ignored when they weren't up for playing, no harm done either way | |||
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"It's a gangbang room, I'm my opinion expect to get gang banged as a minimum To many fussy people, share the love or keep to the private areas... I don't know what clubs you have been to, but that isn't the case anywhere. If you want to do that, you'd be better sticking to a private area or party with people who've pre-agreed to play with you. Assuming you can play with anybody in an open play area is completely wrong, and at best will get you thrown out of the club. Just said it's my opinion not that it is or should be the status quo... I think a slight touch is nicer than being interrupted and out right asked, keeps the flow and simply removing their hand or a quick no thanks will suffice if you're not that interested. I've been in many situations in group sex/gangbang rooms where I've gone for the person next to me and my intentions have been known and gratefully received without having to out right ask. And I've been ignored when they weren't up for playing, no harm done either way" What you said in the post I replied to, and what you are saying here are different..... if consent is being asked / given by some means, then great. | |||
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