FabSwingers.com forum: Swinging, kids and babysitters/nanny! Did you tell that person you swing?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi guys

So obviously new to this, but we're looking forward to getting involved and we are attending our first social party this weekend which is a big step for us.

Assuming we meet some lovely people that want to come and see us another time we need to sort out what to do with the kids.

We think getting a babysitter in solves the issues of attending meets as the kids can stay at home asleep while a babysitter takes care of them, but sooner or later we'll want to host here.

When that happens we don't really want our toddler kids in the house in case they wake up for any reason while we're having our fun, nor would we want to be telling any guests to keep the noise down - that's not fair on them.

We can give them to Mrs PS's Mum who is lovely and would have them, but I'm conscience of the fact that we'd have to find an excuse each time which might get awkward.

What do you guys with kids do? Are you just straight with your grandparents minding your kids and tell them what you're up too?

In some ways although the conversation might be awkward, I'd rather be transparent and truthful than make up excuses, after all the kids are our responsibility and this is for nothing more than our own pleasure.

Looking for all input and suggestions from those of you happily living this lifestyle

Regards

C & T

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You don't have to host, it's not imperative.

You could use hotels or clubs which would rule out the problem of not being able to accommodate.

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

Chances are, if you do decide to tell any potential babysitters the truth,(especially family) you will suddenly find that they come up with excuses as to why they are not available.

Best option is to bend the truth a little.

We don't need babysitters as ours are 21 and 26. But in order to justify why we went out so often to friends and family, we said we were part of a large "friendship" group and it was birthdays, anniversaries, weddings etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep, certainly a tricky one!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just say you're having a night out

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi everyone

Yes you're probably right, maybe not something to be too honest about - it just goes against our nature to fib.

We're usually a pretty quiet couple so I guess we'll have to build this up slowly with Nanny

Regards

C & T X

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By *hat The CuckCouple
over a year ago

South London

We're it virtually the same situation with young children plus we care for an elderly relative so hosting is not possible so we mainly meet at hotels or if the other can accommodate, but it's typically hotels - which can be costly if you want to have meets often, but we use it as an extra excuse to have some time alone also

With regards to reasons why you going out so much, we use the same as mentioned by _thwalescpl.

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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago

Wherever the party is!

"Hi guys

So obviously new to this, but we're looking forward to getting involved and we are attending our first social party this weekend which is a big step for us.

Assuming we meet some lovely people that want to come and see us another time we need to sort out what to do with the kids.

We think getting a babysitter in solves the issues of attending meets as the kids can stay at home asleep while a babysitter takes care of them, but sooner or later we'll want to host here.

We can give them to Mrs PS's Mum who is lovely and would have them, but I'm conscience of the fact that we'd have to find an excuse each time which might get awkward.

What do you guys with kids do? Are you just straight with your grandparents minding your kids and tell them what you're up too?

Looking for all input and suggestions from those of you happily living this lifestyle

Regards

C & T

Xx"

It's been a VERY long time since I told my parents what I get up to in my private life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As said before if you don't want to host you don't have to as a couple not hosting is considered fine (unlike a single guy, who's considered a cheat if he cannot host). We have a baby and although we have no immediate plans to return to the scene we are wondering how we're going to pull it off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What we have gone with, for specific times when we have 'friends' over and have asked grandparents to have the little one overnight is we have said we are having friends over and that we will be drinking, it might get a bit raucous and rather than the little one not having any sleep, could he stay with them and we will pick him up in the morning.

Most grandparents understand that parents need some 'none child time' once in a while and seem happy to help. You wouldn't be lying as you will probably be drinking and partying, you just don't need to mention the part about getting naked and having an orgy in the front room

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We just say we're going to a party/away for some alone time/out on a date night/meeting up with friends. .. whatever. Keep it vague. They don't need gory details.

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By *tongueMan
over a year ago

wrexham

Just say that you are wanting private time without kids to indulge yourselves.

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

Honestly if you say quality time together or meeting up with friends, is that a lie?

We have lives outside of swinging and vanilla couples also have nights out too. Just use the same reasons as them.

Will the next day report need to be any more detailed than we had a great time, got a little too d*unk and enjoyed chatting with friends?

We don't host ourselves but we tend to keep it simple if there is a tale to tell. The more complex the more you will trip over your story.

If you can be honest great, but I don't we don't talk about our sex lives with family. Its just never been a conversation piece. I'm sure others do which is fab, but swinging is not really going to go down well with any one we know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We came back from a no show meet a bit annoyed the other day. Our young baby sitter asked what had happened and we explained we'd been hoping to swing. This shocked her at first but then she confessed she found the idea horny and had actually been watching a bit of porn about a threesome with an older couple whilst we were out. Amazed, we all suddenly looked at each other and began kissing. Soon I was slipping her top off over her pert nipples and Mrs was slipping her hand down into her wet panties.

Then I woke up

Still... we can but dream

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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago

Wherever the party is!

"We came back from a no show meet a bit annoyed the other day. Our young baby sitter asked what had happened and we explained we'd been hoping to swing. This shocked her at first but then she confessed she found the idea horny and had actually been watching a bit of porn about a threesome with an older couple whilst we were out. Amazed, we all suddenly looked at each other and began kissing. Soon I was slipping her top off over her pert nipples and Mrs was slipping her hand down into her wet panties.

Then I woke up

Still... we can but dream

Stories and fantasies?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice thought though freespirt!

)

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By * SCARED x STIFF xCouple
over a year ago

west midlands

We say we're going on a date night and that we might go on to a nightclub if we feel like it so may not be back until very late, ie too late for a babysitter so they usually offer to have the kids overnight, it's still a mad scramble down the motorway the next morning if we've stayed over somewhere though

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By *ischief ManagedCouple
over a year ago

manchester

We just say we are meeting friends once a month well were not lyeing

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

When my kids were young enough to need a sitter I never told the sitter what I was up to while I was out. Because quite frankly it is none of their business. I'm an adult and am entitled to a private life, so it is exactly that, private.

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By *unandbuckCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

Op, the majority of people keep it to themselves. As others have said, parties, clubs and hotels can negate the need for home meets anyway. We've had fun all those scenarios, but want to keep our home and home life separate to swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If we're recruiting grandparents it's simple, we're going out with friends, might be home pretty late, would it be better for them to have a sleepover at theirs?

Better though is having very close friends who also swing and babysit for us from time to time. They know when we're playing. It's nice to be able to not feel like we're sneaking around.

Alternatively share the cost of a hotel, with a budget hotel it's no dearer than a night out and you don't have to stay over.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks all, lots' of great advice

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