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How to get my girl to cheat

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hi how are you? I've been off this site for a while as I've been in a relationship. I've come back on for some advice. I have been with my gf for a while now. I've developed a fantasy of her being with other guys. I've brought this up in sex and she got really turned on however a few days later she said she couldn't do it as she thinks it's damaging to our relationship I told her it wouldn't be I've not mentioned it since but it's eating away at me. Maybe I went about it the wrong way how do I bring it up again?

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

Cheating is fucking around around behind your back, without your knowledge.

Swinging is with knowledge and consent.

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

Show her fab, maybe watch some tv or movies with swinging in, try listening to a podcast together like Life on the Swing set

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi how are you? I've been off this site for a while as I've been in a relationship. I've come back on for some advice. I have been with my gf for a while now. I've developed a fantasy of her being with other guys. I've brought this up in sex and she got really turned on however a few days later she said she couldn't do it as she thinks it's damaging to our relationship I told her it wouldn't be I've not mentioned it since but it's eating away at me. Maybe I went about it the wrong way how do I bring it up again? "

Perhaps it would damage the relationship for her? Keep pushing it when she doesn't want to is likely to have the same affect. But talk to her when you are not having sex and explore both your fantasies but you might need to accept that some fantasies stay fantasies.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Sit down with her and talk to her. If it eats away at you because she won't do it and would eat away at her if she did you're on a hiding to nothing though.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I know but you know what I mean I don't want I watch I want her immediately after. I'm a novice at this

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Just be honest? I'm scared she will think I don't love her which isn't the case.

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Be careful, she has said it will damage things, you should respect that! Problem is that men think things should be all their way and that does not work!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As poster above said....start by showing her fab....your profile?

If she knows you are happy to play away then maybe she will be too?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I don't know it's just an odd subject for her to involved in no disrespect to her but she's lived a very sheltered life..if she was really horny about the idea once before maybe there's something??

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I know but you know what I mean I don't want I watch I want her immediately after. I'm a novice at this "

There are couples who play that way. You need a long talk with your girlfriend in which you're completely honest and encourage her to be too. Then if she really feels its not for her you need to reconsider your relationship. Be kind, be loving and be understanding. Different preferences sexually can make or break a relationship.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I don't know it's just an odd subject for her to involved in no disrespect to her but she's lived a very sheltered life..if she was really horny about the idea once before maybe there's something??"

Fantasy and reality are not the same thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi how are you? I've been off this site for a while as I've been in a relationship. I've come back on for some advice. I have been with my gf for a while now. I've developed a fantasy of her being with other guys. I've brought this up in sex and she got really turned on however a few days later she said she couldn't do it as she thinks it's damaging to our relationship I told her it wouldn't be I've not mentioned it since but it's eating away at me. Maybe I went about it the wrong way how do I bring it up again? "

if she thinks that then maybe she doesn't trust you as much as you think she does?

just ask her outright how she feels about swinging and show her your profile on here, then her misgivings will be realised

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi how are you? I've been off this site for a while as I've been in a relationship. I've come back on for some advice. I have been with my gf for a while now. I've developed a fantasy of her being with other guys. I've brought this up in sex and she got really turned on however a few days later she said she couldn't do it as she thinks it's damaging to our relationship I told her it wouldn't be I've not mentioned it since but it's eating away at me. Maybe I went about it the wrong way how do I bring it up again? "

She said NO.....show her some respect and drop it. X

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks you've been helpful

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By *inkySlinkyCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Maybe she is cheating and hasn't told you.

Sally

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Is there any harm in asking again I've not pushed the matter at all we've spoke about it briefly once. And she said it might damage things at the time I didn't say anything to reassure her

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Maybe if you show her your profile on here she will go mad.

There are some people in a relationship who only want their partner, you can't reconsider a relationship because of that. You are being selfish

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By *ames1763Man
over a year ago

Aberdeen

I think she is worried about you doing the same thing and being with another woman if she goes along with it, so maybe attend a party with a theme where couples are interested in single guys, let her watch other beautiful women enjoy themselves and with time she will gain experience .

If the lifestyle is for her, she will be playing after a couple of parties while you enjoy yourself watching her .

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

My profile is old ok I haven't changed anything since I've come back on

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By *unandbuckCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

I find your choice of words odd.

You say you want her to cheat. Do you mean have sex with other men without your knowledge? That isn't swinging.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Sorry I want her to have sex with me knowing and I want sex straight after With her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My husband used to have that fantasy. After a while he was adamant I was cheating on him for real, and it killed our marriage. The reality of it (even though it wasn't) wasn't a turn on like his fantasy was.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sorry I want her to have sex with me knowing and I want sex straight after With her"

That isn't cheating.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I know I just used the wrong words my bad

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By *unandbuckCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield


"Sorry I want her to have sex with me knowing and I want sex straight after With her"

That's not cheating. If you care about her close your profile down and then either join as a couple uf that's what she wants, or just have a monogamous relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can't force your desires onto someone else. She's said it's something she doesn't want to do, so you should respect that, or risk losing your girlfriend.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sorry I want her to have sex with me knowing and I want sex straight after With her"

Look up cuckolding. You might mean that.

All couples (that didn't mean through swinging) have had to talk to each other about swinging before they started. I think it's harsh to bitch at you for it.

Talk to her when you're not horny. Maybe show her some swinging links with decent info.

If she keeps saying "no" you do have to respect that. Maybe stick to role play where she pretends to have just come home from fucking someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When she dumps you for being a manipulative twat, can I have her number please?

She sounds like a keeper

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By *rightonCheekyMan
over a year ago

Brighton


"You can't force your desires onto someone else. She's said it's something she doesn't want to do, so you should respect that, or risk losing your girlfriend. "

I think you've summed it up. Ive swung as a couple, a single and had a vanilla relationship in the last few years.

My vanilla relationship lasted 2 years and I deleted my Fab profile during that relationship. I mentioned early on that I'm a swinger and it didn't go down well, I never mentioned it again. The lady was worth it, but it didn't work out for other reasons.

You can't put a square peg in a round hole so to speak, it's just wrong.

Equally I've been on dates outside Fab which have ended up with me introducing the lady to this lifestyle.

Come to think of it, I was introduced to swinging myself through a vanilla date which turned out the lady was a swinger and she introduced me.....

I strongly believe you must never try to coocerce somebody or try to persuade them. It either happens because you are both on the same page and trust each other to make it happen, or you don't go there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi how are you? I've been off this site for a while as I've been in a relationship. I've come back on for some advice. I have been with my gf for a while now. I've developed a fantasy of her being with other guys. I've brought this up in sex and she got really turned on however a few days later she said she couldn't do it as she thinks it's damaging to our relationship I told her it wouldn't be I've not mentioned it since but it's eating away at me. Maybe I went about it the wrong way how do I bring it up again? "

Tell her you're on here. I'm sure she'll either cheat on you or leave you then.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Maybe she already suspects you op,if you love her as you claim,either get rid of your profile here and be happy being faithful.If you cant ,own up and let her decide if she still wants you

Miss

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By *ames1763Man
over a year ago

Aberdeen

Yeah, another thing to note is this lifestyle has different departments,I had a girlfriend once who liked the idea but did not like me playing with other women,I did not enjoy swinging as a couple as result, I had to pull out of the relationship because I was not happy and play as a single guy when I realised I was in demand from couples and single ladies which is absolutely amazing , now with my new girlfriend,we are single at the parties and play as singles, we are both very happy this way, so you have to find out what works for you.

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