FabSwingers.com forum: Work related discretion

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi all. I know lots of people refer to the need to be discreet due to their jobs (completely understandable whatever your profession).

My question is, are any of you in professional roles that are regulated by the Health and Care Professions Council (HCPC), and if so, have you ever worried about being on here for fear of 'bringing your profession into disrepute' or worse, being disciplined or struck off due to being on here? Female is in a HCPC regulated profession and looking to share anxieties / seek reassurance from similar others... please private message if preferred. Thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are in very professional roles but we have a few golden rules that help us minimise any risk x

I guess the ideal world would be where your private life was just that and work could not object however as experience has shown it all depends on your management and how they take it xx or the PR shit storm they may think would come with letting it slide xxx

But don't let it put you off just be extra precautions xxx

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By *xxxMan
over a year ago

Bedford & Chester

Hi OP whilst I'm not in that specific profession I used to be in one that would certainly have me up on that charge if investigated.

My advice, for what it's worth, is to join a trade union so you can at least have some kind of professional protection and support if you are in trouble for what ever reason at work.

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By *uncan LynnCouple
over a year ago

Kilmarnock

In position such as this you mention. Yes always a concert , however like all things in life. A little discretion is always best way. Hence only verified people and no faces.

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By *xxxMan
over a year ago

Bedford & Chester

"In position such as this you mention. Yes always a concert , however like all things in life. A little discretion is always best way. Hence only verified people and no faces. "

Totally agree about the discretion, I'd also add that trying as much add possible to merry people who show respect. You can usually get a sense from their profile or how their conduct during messaging but mainly at a social meet first where everyone has the option to pull out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm HCPC registered and have also pondered whether swinging would be classed as bringing my profession into disrepute. I know people have been struck off for escorting, which of course we know is very different from swinging, but to an outsider I think they would see swinging and escorting as somewhat similar.

However, I think that swinging is part of how I express my sexually, and nobody can be struck off for being gay/bi/trans etc. I am also very careful about telling people what I do and where I work and often just tell strangers a little white lie and say that I do admin or work in a shop. I also don't meet local people to where I live and play at clubs to minimise bumping into service users.

I think work would have a case of me bringing the profession into disrepute if I was broadcasting on my profile what my job is or if I was trying to use my job to get meets, but as I'm being discrete about it, I don't see how I'm bringing my profession into disrepute given that most people I play with don't even know what I do.

Hope that makes some sort of sense! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi all. I know lots of people refer to the need to be discreet due to their jobs (completely understandable whatever your profession).

You might want to look into a court case that happened a few years ago, I believe it was looked after by The Spanner Trust.

A care worker (IIRC) was dismissed from their job for attending a fetish club. I believe that they fought and won the case of unfair dismissal.

It never hurts to read up on these things, just in case. (And always keep the number of organisations like The Spanner Trust and The Obscenity Lawyer handy in your phone, just in case.)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know people have been struck off for escorting, which of course we know is very different from swinging, but to an outsider I think they would see swinging and escorting as somewhat similar."

The only difference is that money is changing hands. Either your employer has an issue with sex outside of marriage... or they don't. Point that out to them if they ever have a problem.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At the end of the day I don't think anyone could be struck off for having swinging as part of their lifestyle. Perhaps the risk though is having someone expose you to colleagues or even worse clients/patients, some of whom would take a dim view and your reputation could be badly damaged.

Advice would be to keep your Fab and vanilla lives separate. Keep who's near off and use the delete upon reading facility when sending pics.

Be safe!

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By *xxxMan
over a year ago

Bedford & Chester

" However, I think that swinging is part of how I express my sexually, and nobody can be struck off for being gay/bi/trans etc. X"

Sexual orientation is one of the nine protected characteristics under law (the equality act 2010) so differs slightly in this area. You could argue it forms part of your belief system (also a protected characteristic?) but as with most it would be a judgement call.

Unfair dismissal is hard to run as a defence if the care provider can prove damage to organisation reputation. Especially as in emoluments tribunals can often be decided on the basis of the means justifying the ends. Better defence is a solid working history with no disciplinary sanctions and an invasion of privacy.

Hope that all makes sense

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" However, I think that swinging is part of how I express my sexually, and nobody can be struck off for being gay/bi/trans etc. X

Promiscuous sex and non-monogamy is specifically *not* the same as being gay/bi/trans (and trans isn't the same as being gay/bi - transgender is gender, not sexuality).

Non-monogamy is not a protected characteristic in law.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am not in any employment that falls under this legislation. However, I have had bits of my private life outed by an ex friend, which has impacted on my employment. I was open with her and she just couldn't resist gossiping and as a consequence, far too many people in at least one large, local company, know too much. From this, I have realised just how judgemental people can be and how quick they are to take what they consider to be the moral high ground. I have also heard tales from others who have played with people who have turned nasty and become (both male as well as female) bunny boilers and been stalked on social media or worse. I suspect that until Swinging becomes more mainstream, if it ever does, circumspection is the only answer. Never reveal to anyone what you do for a living, (which is why I do not understand why some people in uniform advertise themselves as such) but to try and keep everything compartmentalised. What we do is not illegal, it is all safe, sane and consensual; though whether it is moral is for others to debate. I agree that to be a Swinger is not the same as being bi/gay/tv/trans etc, so if found out and confronted about our activities, we cannot shelter under that particular umbrella. In a nutshell, if you don't reveal what you do for employment, keep face/identifiable pics private, don't use work computers or internet connections and trust no one, then you employer shouldn't find out, unless of course, they have a profile on here and message you for a meet!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would have problems if my work found out about my swinging life, in fact swinging is sometimes talked about at work with disgust ! However no comment is made about the teenage girls who go out drinking each friday and saturday night and have sex with different unknown guys that they met in the pub lol.

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By *herbert fountainWoman
over a year ago

Hanley

Just make sure that any naked pics don't have your face in them. And don't have face pics public. As long as your profile is not recognisable as you then you are not bringing the organisation into disrepute

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm registered in an equivalent organisation and therefore we take more precautions than we otherwise would. We have our face pics as private and we don't advertise what we do. We don't have nakedness in the same photos as our faces. Unfortunately given all this it makes it slightly harder to strike up the first contact.

Sadly there are far too many people who are too narrow minded to understand that love, sex and relationships don't have to be man+woman+altar until death. Things are hopefully getting better but it will be a long time until being a swinger isn't going to be able to impact your working life.

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