FabSwingers.com forum: Club advise

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Sup guys, been on the site for a little while and I'm super curious about the clubs. My main question is: is it worth a single guy going to a club? There's quite a lot of negative feeling towards single guys ( seemingly more if we are bi) so I'm wondering if I'd just be unwelcome. I dunno guys any advice would be great.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Super wish I'd said advice rather than advise -_-'

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By *orkie321bWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

It's definitely worth single guys going to clubs, in fact many do far better at clubs than on fab.

Respectful and sociable single men are exactly what many single ladies and couples are looking for.

Go for it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It depends entirely on your approach and your expectations. Some people won't be looking for single guys at all, others will be looking but might not choose you (you are, obviously, there to choose for yourself too!!). If you go with the attitude of just relaxing in a liberal, sexual setting, and see any play as a bonus and not a necessity, then I think you'll have a good time. I've only had good experiences with single guys in clubs, and have found them to be respectful and friendly. Chameleons in Darlaston do a great bi night on Mondays

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By *reenleavesCouple
over a year ago

North Wales

Absolutely! If you go with no plans or expectation in mind then you'll be fine! Have a wander round the play rooms to see what's happening. Be polite and friendly when you talk to people and try not to lurk

Make friends and get yourself known as a decent guy in a club environment and doors should open for you.

People will assume that if you're talking to them then you want to play with them. That can be a positive and a negative depending on their past experiences of guys. So try chatting politely with them about things other than sex before leaving them alone for a bit. That'll hopefully show that you can talk to them with something other than your cock and that you're not going to cling to them all night. If they're interested then they'll look for you later. Or they may just jump on you there and then

Go and take it all in and enjoy the experience!

Good luck!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks so much guys

massively helpful. My only other worry is I can be massively shy sometimes so I might legit just struggle to interact. Wouldn't want to seem like I was lurking. But that's just a me thing, gotta build up my confidence. Either way thanks guys, I'll have a look around and see what I can find

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By *reenleavesCouple
over a year ago

North Wales

Do you have a friend you can go with so you're not on your own? It's really hard work when you're shy and find it hard to get talking.

Maybe put up a meet event to see if any other first timers want to accompany you to a club?

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By *reenleavesCouple
over a year ago

North Wales

Actually, your profile says you have a partner. Would she not want to go with you to a club for a nosey around?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Don't really have anyone like that :/ don't really know anyone who is interested in the lifestyle. Or maybe they just don't tell me I suppose aha. Good plan! Not really sure if there would be any takers but definitely worth a shot, think isn't just freeze if i went alone

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

She might, but ATM we are just discussing things over. And I'll be honest I think she's uninterested it all but just feigning to shut me up? She has a very low sex drive, one of the reason I'm looking at clubs. Haven't spoken to her about clubs though

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By *icky_tvLondonTV/TS
over a year ago

london

"Super wish I'd said advice rather than advise -_-'"

Saying this undid the harm, for whom it matters that is e.g. me at least, lol.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Super wish I'd said advice rather than advise -_-'

Saying this undid the harm, for whom it matters that is e.g. me at least, lol.

It bothers the crap out of me so I knew someone would be annoyed! Glad I spotted it straight away.

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By *icky_tvLondonTV/TS
over a year ago

london

"Super wish I'd said advice rather than advise -_-'

Saying this undid the harm, for whom it matters that is e.g. me at least, lol.

It bothers the crap out of me so I knew someone would be annoyed! Glad I spotted it straight away. "

Personally, I am never "annoyed" by poor grammar, so allow me to once again reassure you that those like me will readily excuse your self-acknowledged and speedily addressed error, lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sup guys, been on the site for a little while and I'm super curious about the clubs. My main question is: is it worth a single guy going to a club? There's quite a lot of negative feeling towards single guys ( seemingly more if we are bi) so I'm wondering if I'd just be unwelcome. I dunno guys any advice would be great."

Single guys have lots of uses for ladies who like lots of cock and lots of spunk. I love single guys in clubs, we need more hot ones near me though!

Ruby

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Respectful single guys, bi or not, are more than welcome in the clubs we use.The lurkers and gropers aren't at all welcome.

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By *inderellaRockerfellazCouple
over a year ago

warrington

Respectful single guys, bi or not, are more than welcome in the clubs we use.The lurkers and gropers aren't at all welcome."

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley

Women go to clubs generally to meet men. So, yes, it is worth you going. Whether you choose to declare your bisexuality there is up to you

You will need to make an effort though. Make eye contact, smile and start a conversation about the weather, etc. No different from meeting a woman in a bar or on a train. Well, anyway, that is how I feel

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Single guys have lots of uses for ladies who like lots of cock and lots of spunk. I love single guys in clubs, we need more hot ones near me though!

Ruby

Then I'll just have to find one! I'm not..that far?

not hot either though more importantly haha thanks!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Women go to clubs generally to meet men. So, yes, it is worth you going. Whether you choose to declare your bisexuality there is up to you

Yeah honestly that's was the position I was coming into from, wasn't in my mind to just run for the nearest woman I find flinging my tool around. Thanks for the advice, just got to not chicken out now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My only other worry is I can be massively shy sometimes so I might legit just struggle to interact."

Shyness generally comes from a lack of self confidence and the fear of rejection, so I would suggest a few things. First examine your current friendships, are they positive for you and your friends? Is there respect each way? Cut out any negative relationships, any people who don't make you feel good about yourself.

Build friendships with people who are supportive of you and repay that support back. This will help you improve your self image. Take time, it can take months or years to build a really good group of supportive, loving friends.

Get used to talking to strangers in everyday situations. Strike up conversations with the person serving you in the shop, the person next to you at the bus stop. Get used to taking to strangers. Not everyone will want to talk to you, so listen and watch the cues you get from other people when you talk to them to either continue talking or leave up. Do it everyday

You will eventually become far more experienced and natural at talking to people and will be able to strike up conversation with anyone anytime.

And guess what?

When you take all those conversational skills and self-confidence in to a club with you, you will somehow become magically far more attractive than you were before. Both to others and yourself.

Lastly, get used to rejection. Get a part time (or full time) sales job where 99 out of 100 people tell you to fuck off and walk out of the office with a smile on your face. Life goes on, there is always another adventure around the corner, don't get hung-up on what you could have won!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

""My only other worry is I can be massively shy sometimes so I might legit just struggle to interact."

You will eventually become far more experienced and natural at talking to people and will be able to strike up conversation with anyone anytime.

And guess what?

When you take all those conversational skills and self-confidence in to a club with you, you will somehow become magically far more attractive than you were before. Both to others and yourself.

Fun twist? I work at a till in a shop, I'm the best customer service employee we have ( at least in terms of customer intereaction). Put me In a Crowd and I can shout over the top, talk to anyone. It's the sexual aspect really, I've had a few bad experience and relationships which has made me pretty shy when it comes to sex. It's not a major thing, just something I'd have to take into consideration and adjust. Thank you for the advice though! It's hugely appreciated

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've had a few bad experience and relationships which has made me pretty shy when it comes to sex."

This is probably something that is common to us all. Solution to bad relationships screwing you up? Know the signs and learn to run away from them sooner. As soon as the warning signs appear that something is not right early on question it, and if the replies are not satisfactory, leave. Don't let other peoples bullshit affect your karma. That is what I meant about supportive relationships. Choose to spend your time with people who make you feel good.

Unless you have a thing for being made to feel bad of course!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi chameleons in darlaston are running a bbw party night on the 19th great opportunity to try the club before becoming a member xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never any negativity from us x we love single guys coming to our events

We do get only get half the guys on our guestlist show up,we expect that,hence we work out our lists to a good ratio

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hi chameleons in darlaston are running a bbw party night on the 19th great opportunity to try the club before becoming a member xx"

Thanks! Might check it out, might be a bit too soon for me to sort out though.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Never any negativity from us x we love single guys coming to our events

We do get only get half the guys on our guestlist show up,we expect that,hence we work out our lists to a good ratio

I think maybe I just got the wrong end of the stick with the negativity thing honestly. It was just that I'd noticed some dislike of bi guys on the site and just sort of assumed it would cross over. So you get a good cross section of people then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If single guys didn't go I wouldn't go so yes they are a vital part of the club scene

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi chameleons in darlaston are running a bbw party night on the 19th great opportunity to try the club before becoming a member xx

Thanks! Might check it out, might be a bit too soon for me to sort out though. "
you would need to pop name on the guest list if you cant make this one there one in april xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never any negativity from us x we love single guys coming to our events

We do get only get half the guys on our guestlist show up,we expect that,hence we work out our lists to a good ratio

The reason I love Eureka's so much is I am personally a single woman who wants to meet single men,they are the most open minded club I know,they do a monthly bi and gay event and a T-girls and admirers event.not only that they welcome all men except once a month on a Thursday where they do a couples/single ladies night,I won't go because I like singlemen too

At our bbw+admirers we get a mix of people as the club is also open to all,we don't tend to get man heavy,in fact we want more friday

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