FabSwingers.com forum: addicts

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

sex or otherwise, but don't mention the otherwise coz we can't discuss drugs and this'll get deleted.

how do you cope when you have a 'blip'? i've felt like i'm getting uncontrollable again, pretty sure i'm gonna go mad and fuck everything in sight soon.

do you ever think you'll never be an addict of anything and never be truly free? i do. been a sex addict, alcoholic, had kids and they kept me busy all the time so did well then, now i'm like back to not controlling myself because i don't really have a reason to.

not sure if i'm harming myself or not either. i only ever take risks when i'm not thinking straight and not coping (this is really rare), i'm thinking straight and coping with life right now just my body is driving me mad.

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"sex or otherwise, but don't mention the otherwise coz we can't discuss drugs and this'll get deleted.

how do you cope when you have a 'blip'? i've felt like i'm getting uncontrollable again, pretty sure i'm gonna go mad and fuck everything in sight soon.

I don't suffer from any addictions unless you count control.as a addiction

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"sex or otherwise, but don't mention the otherwise coz we can't discuss drugs and this'll get deleted.

how do you cope when you have a 'blip'? i've felt like i'm getting uncontrollable again, pretty sure i'm gonna go mad and fuck everything in sight soon.

I don't suffer from any addictions unless you count control.as a addiction

i'm probably too liberal, i think you can be that.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

Maybe read the hobbies threads. Sounds like you need a dedicated focus or something to keep your mind/body from fixating on things that you know could potentially spiral into things that aren't fruitful.

Walks, history, reading, origami, art, see what short courses there are or social groups are in the area that may interest.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe read the hobbies threads. Sounds like you need a dedicated focus or something to keep your mind/body from fixating on things that you know could potentially spiral into things that aren't fruitful.

Walks, history, reading, origami, art, see what short courses there are or social groups are in the area that may interest. "

that would help, although my concentration is poor. especially right now.

also, like when i had my family to keep me busy i was getting very regular sex at the time. that helped more.

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"sex or otherwise, but don't mention the otherwise coz we can't discuss drugs and this'll get deleted.

how do you cope when you have a 'blip'? i've felt like i'm getting uncontrollable again, pretty sure i'm gonna go mad and fuck everything in sight soon.

I don't suffer from any addictions unless you count control.as a addiction

i'm probably too liberal, i think you can be that.

Yes you can to be liberal and carefree routine is a great way to smooth ones mind one can become lost in the repetitive nature of a simple task .which in turn can smooth a restless mind and soul .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do believe once you're addicted to something you've got to be on guard forever.

Consider your triggers, how you can avoid them. Consider if the behaviour is damaging or not, to yourself and your relationships (at the moment you say it's not)

A lapse is not a relapse, but it can be if you leave it to escalate!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a very addictive personality. Thankfully atm my addictions are bath bombs make up n candles.

xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"sex or otherwise, but don't mention the otherwise coz we can't discuss drugs and this'll get deleted.

how do you cope when you have a 'blip'? i've felt like i'm getting uncontrollable again, pretty sure i'm gonna go mad and fuck everything in sight soon.

I don't suffer from any addictions unless you count control.as a addiction

i'm probably too liberal, i think you can be that.

Yes you can to be liberal and carefree routine is a great way to smooth ones mind one can become lost in the repetitive nature of a simple task .which in turn can smooth a restless mind and soul ."

I agree with this totally. If my routine is fucked up then I struggle to keep in control of my life and emotions. Xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I do believe once you're addicted to something you've got to be on guard forever.

Consider your triggers, how you can avoid them. Consider if the behaviour is damaging or not, to yourself and your relationships (at the moment you say it's not)

A lapse is not a relapse, but it can be if you leave it to escalate! "

this is what i've done. left it too long until i'm now finding it's getting uncontrollable. not even lapsed yet so that's good i think.

just signed up for courses online to keep me busy. got carried away and nearly signed up for some ethics in biology using manga course lol.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have a very addictive personality. Thankfully atm my addictions are bath bombs make up n candles.

xxx"

i'm going to get addicted to something else, more worthwhile, hopefully.

i'm ok without a routine and actually prefer not to have one and just go with the flow, until i start flowing into places i don't really want to be.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"sex or otherwise, but don't mention the otherwise coz we can't discuss drugs and this'll get deleted.

how do you cope when you have a 'blip'? i've felt like i'm getting uncontrollable again, pretty sure i'm gonna go mad and fuck everything in sight soon.

I don't suffer from any addictions unless you count control.as a addiction

i'm probably too liberal, i think you can be that.

Yes you can to be liberal and carefree routine is a great way to smooth ones mind one can become lost in the repetitive nature of a simple task .which in turn can smooth a restless mind and soul ."

i struggled with boundaries but have implemented them onto others. don't know how to apply them to myself all the time yet, just need to figure that out maybe?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lapse is not a relapse, but can be if you leave it to escalate! "

This is so true. I allow myself lapses now with and stick to the timescale of lapsing.

The only way I've coped with my 2 most damaging addictions is major life style changes to avoid temptation

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By *urexIronBarMan
over a year ago

South Manchester

Yeah, there are times when I don't feel in control of myself and I spiral further outta control

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have a very addictive personality. Thankfully atm my addictions are bath bombs make up n candles.

xxx

i'm going to get addicted to something else, more worthwhile, hopefully.

i'm ok without a routine and actually prefer not to have one and just go with the flow, until i start flowing into places i don't really want to be."

Awwww maybe have something to ground you then on those occasions. Xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have a very addictive personality. Thankfully atm my addictions are bath bombs make up n candles.

xxx

i'm going to get addicted to something else, more worthwhile, hopefully.

i'm ok without a routine and actually prefer not to have one and just go with the flow, until i start flowing into places i don't really want to be.

Awwww maybe have something to ground you then on those occasions. Xxx"

how?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

did google but got a lot of results about electrician stuff.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?"

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can you split it up a bit more After you have had sex do you them still want more sex. Or do you then want more sex with another person?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have a very addictive personality. Thankfully atm my addictions are bath bombs make up n candles.

xxx

i'm going to get addicted to something else, more worthwhile, hopefully.

i'm ok without a routine and actually prefer not to have one and just go with the flow, until i start flowing into places i don't really want to be.

Awwww maybe have something to ground you then on those occasions. Xxx

how?

I'm not sure tbh I'm just thinking along the lines of when anxiety hits you ground yourself by focusing on things that are solid and dependable like your feet on the ground. The Fresh air being drawn into your lungs.

So maybe if you focus on something that you can control. Maybe cooking? Xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"sex or otherwise, but don't mention the otherwise coz we can't discuss drugs and this'll get deleted.

how do you cope when you have a 'blip'? i've felt like i'm getting uncontrollable again, pretty sure i'm gonna go mad and fuck everything in sight soon.

Easy Cure;

have another kid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are so lucky being a woman you can feed your addiction on here lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have a very addictive personality. Thankfully atm my addictions are bath bombs make up n candles.

xxx

i'm going to get addicted to something else, more worthwhile, hopefully.

i'm ok without a routine and actually prefer not to have one and just go with the flow, until i start flowing into places i don't really want to be.

Awwww maybe have something to ground you then on those occasions. Xxx

how?

So maybe if you focus on something that you can control. Maybe cooking? Xxx"

i am hungry now i've noticed. can't cook for the next few weeks/months/years/forever constantly though.

think i'll fuck a few randoms and remind myself how unsatisfying that kind of sex is and get over it.

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By *lorious hole bs16Man
over a year ago

Bristol

"You are so lucky being a woman you can feed your addiction on here lol "

Interesting way to look at it..lots of addicts benefit from abstinence..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have a very addictive personality. Thankfully atm my addictions are bath bombs make up n candles.

xxx

i'm going to get addicted to something else, more worthwhile, hopefully.

i'm ok without a routine and actually prefer not to have one and just go with the flow, until i start flowing into places i don't really want to be.

Awwww maybe have something to ground you then on those occasions. Xxx

how?

So maybe if you focus on something that you can control. Maybe cooking? Xxx

i am hungry now i've noticed. can't cook for the next few weeks/months/years/forever constantly though.

think i'll fuck a few randoms and remind myself how unsatisfying that kind of sex is and get over it."

Actually you mite be on to something there! Find a fugly mite cure you then.

xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can you split it up a bit more After you have had sex do you them still want more sex. Or do you then want more sex with another person?"

i'm not even having sex right now, well rarely. but i can have sex forever if my body lets me. and i can have it with anyone male.

previously have just keep getting guys round for sex, it's easy enough. don't want to do that any more though. want to be sorted. it was going well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Exercise is a good way to get a rush of the good hormones but also exert some of the restlessness. Not everyone can I understand that as I am very limited myself. They say to break a habit you need to make a new one. So don't focus on the "don't and can't" but instead get something else to force your focus somewhere else. xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Exercise is a good way to get a rush of the good hormones but also exert some of the restlessness. Not everyone can I understand that as I am very limited myself. They say to break a habit you need to make a new one. So don't focus on the "don't and can't" but instead get something else to force your focus somewhere else. xxx"

i start some kind of physio the end of this month.

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By *urexIronBarMan
over a year ago

South Manchester

i start some kind of physio the end of this month.

Good luck, Hope it helps, let us know how you get on x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

been talking to someone privately as well and i feel a lot better now.

thanks all. really needed the help, don't feel as stressed and urgent now.

what also helped was the guys who thought it was ok to message me and send dick pics, thanks for those. reminded me when you're vulnerable there's always someone out there ready to pounce and take advantage of that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now."

Ok, it was more of a general question than aimed at you in particular

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"been talking to someone privately as well and i feel a lot better now.

thanks all. really needed the help, don't feel as stressed and urgent now.

Good xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now.

Ok, it was more of a general question than aimed at you in particular

the you confused me.

i feel 100% better now. still want sex but not with just anyone.

you could google the criteria and see if it applies to you? got this off one site but there might be better sites, not really bothered googling about it for ages because i've felt ok.

Hypersexual Disorder Signs

While some people mistakenly think that hypersexual disorders and sex addiction merely refers to an unusually high sex drive, it is much more complex than that. It is very similar to other addictions, which is evident upon closer examination of the various sex addiction signs.

Just as an alcoholic craves his next drink, thinks he can stop on his own but fails over and over, uses alcohol to ease emotional pain, stress, loneliness, and anxiety, and continues to drink despite the negative consequences, so it is with a sex addict. Like other addictions, sex addiction is also progressive. It often starts with a relatively harmless behavior such as excessive masturbation while watching porn. Over time, however, it typically leads to other types of sexual activity that may be very risky or blatantly dangerous.

For the sex addict, sexual activity provides an intense, intoxicating euphoria or “high” while lacking any genuine emotional connection, intimacy, or love. It’s a temporary escape. Once the high wears off, the vicious cycle starts all over again. For the addict, the activity is not fulfilling. It has a significant negative impact on his life and often causes a lot of shame and self-loathing.

The indicators of hypersexual disorders will vary to some degree depending on the individual. For example, some sex addicts have multiple extramarital affairs, while others frequently hire prostitutes or use phone sex services excessively. Following are some of the most common sex addiction signs:

• Excessive masturbation – This is one of the most common early sex addiction signs. Often the sex addict masturbates while engaging in other sexual activity (e.g. while viewing pornography or talking to a phone sex operator).

• Obsessing about sex to the point that it interferes with their life

• Spending a significant amount of time planning their sexual activity – Sex addicts, just like drug addicts and other types of addicts, will devote a large amount of time determining where and how they will get their next “fix”.

• Frequent viewing of pornography or use of sexually explicit websites or other online services – This may include videos, adult magazines, pornographic websites, “adult” chat rooms, paying to watch sexual activity via webcams, or using dating websites that connect people interested in sexual relationships and / or one night stands.

• Frequent or excessive use of phone sex services

• Having multiple extramarital affairs or frequently having sex with multiple partners

• Frequent one-night stands with total strangers or prostitutes

• Staying emotionally detached from sexual partners – Many sex addicts are unable to establish a normal, healthy connection with a sexual partner. This is often due to deep-seated feelings of self-hate and shame. It’s not uncommon for a sex addict to want nothing more to do with a sexual partner once the activity is over.

• Frequent sex without using protection – Many sex addicts engage in high risk behavior such as unprotected sex. This is often because they are so driven to satisfy their craving that they don’t consider or care about the potential consequences.

• Engaging in sexual behavior that directly conflicts with their personal values or religious beliefs – For example, sex addiction signs for someone who is a devout Christian or Catholic may include having multiple partners or extramarital affairs, frequent one night stands, sex with children, or sex with prostitutes. They believe their behavior is morally wrong yet they’re unable to stop.

• Obsessing about a sexual partner who is unattainable – This type of fixation may lead to stalking or sexually harassing the individual, spying on them bathing or engaging in sexual activity (voyeurism), and, in some instances, violence.

• Frequently engaging in paraphilias (sexual behaviors that are considered unusual, distasteful, or unacceptable) – Paraphilias include things like exhibitionism, voyeurism, sadism, masochism, and pedophilia. Although they may indicate a possible addiction, not everyone who engages in paraphilias is a sex addict.

• The inability to stop despite the consequences – As with all addictions, this is one of the primary sex addiction signs. The vast majority of sex addicts are unable to stop without treatment for their addiction.

If you or someone you love can identify with any of the above signs of hypersexual disorders or sex addiction, it’s time to get help. Treatment is available and can be very beneficial. The road to recovery won’t be easy, but regaining control of your life and putting an end to destructive behaviors that may hurt you or others is definitely worth the effort.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"been talking to someone privately as well and i feel a lot better now.

thanks all. really needed the help, don't feel as stressed and urgent now.

Good xxx"

certainly is. sometimes need little reminders of why it's best not to lose control as well.

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

I'm addicted to serial killers and murder mystry, thrillers, horrors etc

If i don't watch one at least once a day I get moody and irritable and start going cold turkey

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now.

Ok, it was more of a general question than aimed at you in particular

the you confused me.

i feel 100% better now. still want sex but not with just anyone.

you could google the criteria and see if it applies to you? got this off one site but there might be better sites, not really bothered googling about it for ages because i've felt ok.

Hypersexual Disorder Signs

• Obsessing about sex to the point that it interferes with their life

• Frequent or excessive use of phone sex services

• Having multiple extramarital affairs or frequently having sex with multiple partners

• Frequent one-night stands with total strangers or prostitutes

Thank you, that was very interesting reading. It's made me question some of my behaviour

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now.

Ok, it was more of a general question than aimed at you in particular

the you confused me.

i feel 100% better now. still want sex but not with just anyone.

you could google the criteria and see if it applies to you? got this off one site but there might be better sites, not really bothered googling about it for ages because i've felt ok.

Hypersexual Disorder Signs

• Obsessing about sex to the point that it interferes with their life

• Frequent or excessive use of phone sex services

• Having multiple extramarital affairs or frequently having sex with multiple partners

• Frequent one-night stands with total strangers or prostitutes

Thank you, that was very interesting reading. It's made me question some of my behaviour

you can message me if you want, i've no filters on. as you can see i'm rubbish at dealing with these things but am a good listener.

i feel ok now. not too bothered about keeping my sex drive under control, i just want to be fussy about who i share my body with.

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By *lan43sumMan
over a year ago

Leicester

Fab is a sex site and most of us have friends on here that we play with or would like to play with and to a lesser or greater extent there's a fair bit of fantasy involved.

This thread has confirmed that there are some genuinely caring people around.

I struggle to write down the thoughts the OP has stimulated in my head. Men on fab have to work at it for many hours to get anywhere and with every message i compose I will try to think I'm writing to another real person with genuine sensual interests. This could be seen as showing an addiction to the fantasy of fabsex.

I can't see things exactly as the OP because if I said I'd fuck the next lady that asked me to I'd be waiting months!

For the first time in my following of the forums I feel that we should have local groups who meet socially so that we could properly discuss the trials and tribulations of being sexually driven without there being condoms on the table.

It has to be good to share concerns with like minded people. Makes me sad to read that the OP has been upset by lack of sensitivity shown by some responders.

Hope some of the excellent posts have helped 3sum Queen. There are always positives to balance negatives. Being able to talk about our problems is already a positive I think.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Fab is a sex site and most of us have friends on here that we play with or would like to play with and to a lesser or greater extent there's a fair bit of fantasy involved.

This thread has confirmed that there are some genuinely caring people around.

I can't see things exactly as the OP because if I said I'd fuck the next lady that asked me to I'd be waiting months!

It has to be good to share concerns with like minded people. Makes me sad to read that the OP has been upset by lack of sensitivity shown by some responders.

Hope some of the excellent posts have helped 3sum Queen. There are always positives to balance negatives. Being able to talk about our problems is already a positive I think.

i was thinking to start a skype group tbh because there is nothing of support here. i've looked plenty of times.

that way we can message each other on phones or laptops and in an environment that could be safer than on here, but i'm not sure how good of a support sex addicts are to other addicts.

just having someone talk to me about things was good, it helped calm me down. i actually am at a point now where i'm not even bothered about having sex at all. i still feel horny but not feeling any need to do anything about that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

by here i mean in my area. all i can see if manchester and london have support groups.

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By *ishopstippleMan
over a year ago

Purley

I am Not Addicted. Dont suffer from withdrawal

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now.

Ok, it was more of a general question than aimed at you in particular

the you confused me.

i feel 100% better now. still want sex but not with just anyone.

you could google the criteria and see if it applies to you? got this off one site but there might be better sites, not really bothered googling about it for ages because i've felt ok.

Hypersexual Disorder Signs

• Obsessing about sex to the point that it interferes with their life

• Frequent or excessive use of phone sex services

• Having multiple extramarital affairs or frequently having sex with multiple partners

• Frequent one-night stands with total strangers or prostitutes

Thank you, that was very interesting reading. It's made me question some of my behaviour

It's only a copy and paste

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By *lan43sumMan
over a year ago

Leicester

"by here i mean in my area. all i can see if manchester and london have support groups."

With anything online it has the advantage of being always there but I have no experience of how moderation might work. The informal group gathering of empathetic adults could regulate itself. I can also see that we'd have to be careful about the venue as no doubt there would be people who would not share our more liberal views.

I to I counselling has value but needs a trained pro to be fair. A group of 3 or 4 of us might be enough for fully open sharing. 30 would be too many.

Anyone reading the thread above will surely see themselves somewhere amongst the points made. Thanks to the OP for sharing so openly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I'm addicted to this website, I should be doing some work!!! I keep finding myself here and have to take myself away again.

I've even started using it as a reward for myself if I get so much work done.

I didn't think I had an addictive personality, I've normally got things under control.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Another angle to add is to take the time to really explore and understand our behaviour.

There are triggers for our compulsions but there is often a long sequence of thoughts/decisions that lead to the behaviour. We don't often realise the early steps in this sequence, then by the time we notice the compulsion has become too big to resist.

I will use an example of Mr A whose addiction is pornography and masturbation. This is from finish to start:

7. After a few hours lost in a maze of Internet pornography, Mr A ejaculates; feeling ashamed and wasteful

6. Mr A starts to search for porn

5. Mr A is finding motivation difficult and his mind begins to drift

4. Mr A sits on his bed and loads up his laptop

3. Mr A thinks no, I'll be able to do it fine at home

2. Mr A considers going to the library as he focuses well there

1. Mr A wakes up and knows he has work to do

It's a basic example but steps 2-3 would have been the ideal time for Mr A to change the outcome of today. The decisions he made here were decisions to facilitate his compulsive behaviour, albeit (somewhat) subconsciously.

Bringing these steps into the conscious is crucial, as by steps 5-6 his dopamine receptors are getting pretty needy and the lure is very difficult to resist. He remembers how enjoyable it will be...

Anyway, that's one behavioural approach to the situation. The other side is to understand what is driving our addictions, the emotional needs based side. That will only be done with deep reflection, preferably with an independent professional.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now.

Ok, it was more of a general question than aimed at you in particular

the you confused me.

i feel 100% better now. still want sex but not with just anyone.

you could google the criteria and see if it applies to you? got this off one site but there might be better sites, not really bothered googling about it for ages because i've felt ok.

Hypersexual Disorder Signs

• Obsessing about sex to the point that it interferes with their life

• Frequent or excessive use of phone sex services

• Having multiple extramarital affairs or frequently having sex with multiple partners

• Frequent one-night stands with total strangers or prostitutes

Thank you, that was very interesting reading. It's made me question some of my behaviour

It's only a copy and paste

And?

I did realise that

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now.

Ok, it was more of a general question than aimed at you in particular

the you confused me.

i feel 100% better now. still want sex but not with just anyone.

you could google the criteria and see if it applies to you? got this off one site but there might be better sites, not really bothered googling about it for ages because i've felt ok.

Hypersexual Disorder Signs

• Obsessing about sex to the point that it interferes with their life

• Frequent or excessive use of phone sex services

• Having multiple extramarital affairs or frequently having sex with multiple partners

• Frequent one-night stands with total strangers or prostitutes

Thank you, that was very interesting reading. It's made me question some of my behaviour

It's only a copy and paste

And?

I did realise that"

Are you certain?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now.

Ok, it was more of a general question than aimed at you in particular

the you confused me.

i feel 100% better now. still want sex but not with just anyone.

you could google the criteria and see if it applies to you? got this off one site but there might be better sites, not really bothered googling about it for ages because i've felt ok.

Hypersexual Disorder Signs

• Obsessing about sex to the point that it interferes with their life

• Frequent or excessive use of phone sex services

• Having multiple extramarital affairs or frequently having sex with multiple partners

• Frequent one-night stands with total strangers or prostitutes

Thank you, that was very interesting reading. It's made me question some of my behaviour

It's only a copy and paste

so copy and pasting things from sex addiction website means nothing? and i did actually say that it was from a website, and that people could look things up themselves.

nobody cares about some stupid petty thing you're doing to derail a support topic.

this topic, if people respect that, is a safe space for us to talk.

if i was you i'd back off and resist the temptation to try and put others down because you need some kind of ego boost. it's doing the opposite if you could actually comprehend what you look like right now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"by here i mean in my area. all i can see if manchester and london have support groups.

I to I counselling has value but needs a trained pro to be fair. A group of 3 or 4 of us might be enough for fully open sharing. 30 would be too many.

Anyone reading the thread above will surely see themselves somewhere amongst the points made. Thanks to the OP for sharing so openly.

i think a big group of us would be ok, if a few us of who already know we are genuine start off the group. and then add others as we go. as people often go quiet in groups or don't need them so much.

our main threats are, that we tempt each other to indulge in our addiction, or that someone joins the group to troll it (as we can see has already happened in this post).

not sure what support we can give each other but i found having someone else ask me a lot of questions helped divert my mind away from what my body was feeling to what my head was thinking. it was also a good distraction.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

and i cannot thank that person enough for taking a considerable amount of time to do that for me.

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now.

Ok, it was more of a general question than aimed at you in particular

the you confused me.

i feel 100% better now. still want sex but not with just anyone.

you could google the criteria and see if it applies to you? got this off one site but there might be better sites, not really bothered googling about it for ages because i've felt ok.

Hypersexual Disorder Signs

• Obsessing about sex to the point that it interferes with their life

• Frequent or excessive use of phone sex services

• Having multiple extramarital affairs or frequently having sex with multiple partners

• Frequent one-night stands with total strangers or prostitutes

Thank you, that was very interesting reading. It's made me question some of my behaviour

It's only a copy and paste

so copy and pasting things from sex addiction website means nothing? and i did actually say that it was from a website, and that people could look things up themselves.

nobody cares about some stupid petty thing you're doing to derail a support topic.

this topic, if people respect that, is a safe space for us to talk.

Boring

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please can we agree to stop requoting that super long post? My thumbs are beginning to ache

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you know if you're a sex addict or just have a very high sex drive?

because i need help to control myself now?

because i'm on fab a lot more than i'd like to be as it's the only healthy way i can think of to stay connected to sex without putting myself at risk.

there's other things as well that i'm not prepared to say right now.

Ok, it was more of a general question than aimed at you in particular

the you confused me.

i feel 100% better now. still want sex but not with just anyone.

you could google the criteria and see if it applies to you? got this off one site but there might be better sites, not really bothered googling about it for ages because i've felt ok.

Hypersexual Disorder Signs

• Obsessing about sex to the point that it interferes with their life

• Frequent or excessive use of phone sex services

• Having multiple extramarital affairs or frequently having sex with multiple partners

• Frequent one-night stands with total strangers or prostitutes

Thank you, that was very interesting reading. It's made me question some of my behaviour

It's only a copy and paste

so copy and pasting things from sex addiction website means nothing? and i did actually say that it was from a website, and that people could look things up themselves.

nobody cares about some stupid petty thing you're doing to derail a support topic.

this topic, if people respect that, is a safe space for us to talk.

Boring "

Such a well thought out reply

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By *lan43sumMan
over a year ago

Leicester

The cut and pasted input is very good reading. I feel I'm somewhere down some of the roads mentioned but not all. Men on fab have to work very hard and put time, effort and emotion into emails.

By sharing with others who can be honest about their journies has helped me but I'll hope to always enjoy sex! Hope OP is doing OK now?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use my left hand just to change it up a bit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get addicted to things for a short amount of time.

I am trying to cut down on fab, used to wake up, straight on chat rooms with talk or watch people I could then start my day.

Happy to hear your going In the right direction 3some with yours. Hope the group suport works xx

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By *lwaysup4it69Couple
over a year ago

Kirkby in Ashfield

"I have a very addictive personality. Thankfully atm my addictions are bath bombs make up n candles.

xxx

i'm going to get addicted to something else, more worthwhile, hopefully.

i'm ok without a routine and actually prefer not to have one and just go with the flow, until i start flowing into places i don't really want to be.

Awwww maybe have something to ground you then on those occasions. Xxx

how?

So maybe if you focus on something that you can control. Maybe cooking? Xxx

i am hungry now i've noticed. can't cook for the next few weeks/months/years/forever constantly though.

think i'll fuck a few randoms and remind myself how unsatisfying that kind of sex is and get over it."

I bet you are never short of offers of sex

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I get addicted to things for a short amount of time.

I am trying to cut down on fab, used to wake up, straight on chat rooms with talk or watch people I could then start my day.

Happy to hear your going In the right direction 3some with yours. Hope the group suport works xx"

i don't know if i'm the right person to run a support group yet. had someone today and chatted with them and i know i can't really offer support, especially as i still need to get some for myself at times.

haven't a clue what i'm doing but yeah been heading in the right direction for a long time, just had another blip yesterday that had been building up for ages.

also, i'm wondering if i have persistent arousal syndrome? but some things can put me off feeling horny so idk, pretty sure it's mostly in my head what's going on. could be something to look into though.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The cut and pasted input is very good reading. I feel I'm somewhere down some of the roads mentioned but not all. Men on fab have to work very hard and put time, effort and emotion into emails.

By sharing with others who can be honest about their journies has helped me but I'll hope to always enjoy sex! Hope OP is doing OK now?"

yeah i feel a lot better today. no sense of urgency, even managed to do some of my course, and get 50% results on my first tests lol. bad score already but i'm not bothered, only doing it to learn (and for free).

bonus, my son has been asking about what i'm learning too, and we had a nice chat about AI, social science, and jaques fresco, and learned how honey bees do maths.

so good day all round.

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

"The cut and pasted input is very good reading. I feel I'm somewhere down some of the roads mentioned but not all. Men on fab have to work very hard and put time, effort and emotion into emails.

By sharing with others who can be honest about their journies has helped me but I'll hope to always enjoy sex! Hope OP is doing OK now?

bonus, my son has been asking about what i'm learning too, and we had a nice chat about AI, social science, and jaques fresco, and learned how honey bees do maths.

so good day all round.

Don't you work?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The cut and pasted input is very good reading. I feel I'm somewhere down some of the roads mentioned but not all. Men on fab have to work very hard and put time, effort and emotion into emails.

By sharing with others who can be honest about their journies has helped me but I'll hope to always enjoy sex! Hope OP is doing OK now?

bonus, my son has been asking about what i'm learning too, and we had a nice chat about AI, social science, and jaques fresco, and learned how honey bees do maths.

so good day all round.

Don't you work?"

you interested because you want to be friends? coz that's kind of a personal question and none of your business otherwise.

you're not really the type of friend i'd like either so you will never find out.

troll off.

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

[Removed by poster at 18/01/17 09:54:28]

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

"The cut and pasted input is very good reading. I feel I'm somewhere down some of the roads mentioned but not all. Men on fab have to work very hard and put time, effort and emotion into emails.

By sharing with others who can be honest about their journies has helped me but I'll hope to always enjoy sex! Hope OP is doing OK now?

bonus, my son has been asking about what i'm learning too, and we had a nice chat about AI, social science, and jaques fresco, and learned how honey bees do maths.

so good day all round.

Don't you work?

you interested because you want to be friends? coz that's kind of a personal question and none of your business otherwise.

you're not really the type of friend i'd like either so you will never find out.

troll off."

How have you come up with that assumption when you have your personal bits all over fab

Just thought copy and pasting was your full time job as you do enough of it.

Friends with you yikes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Mutual sight, Mutual sound

Mutual struggle, for shared ground

It's safe, to say, they'll try to take from me

I'm just another one for them to break down

Steeped in denial, the daily grind

Dream of a world for me and my kind

It's safe in the alternative reality

So stick your standards where the sun doesn't shine

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get outta my space

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

Explain the reasons, Explain the rhymes

It's not required, inside our minds

It's safe to try, no need to justify

Or take their guilt trip at the end of the line.

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get off of my case

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

(My Own Little World)

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

It's time to go: get out of my face

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, we will never die

(Our Own Little World)

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

"Mutual sight, Mutual sound

Mutual struggle, for shared ground

It's safe, to say, they'll try to take from me

I'm just another one for them to break down

Steeped in denial, the daily grind

Dream of a world for me and my kind

It's safe in the alternative reality

So stick your standards where the sun doesn't shine

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get outta my space

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

Explain the reasons, Explain the rhymes

It's not required, inside our minds

It's safe to try, no need to justify

Or take their guilt trip at the end of the line.

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get off of my case

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

(My Own Little World)

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

It's time to go: get out of my face

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, we will never die

(Our Own Little World)"

Another copy and paste

Zzzzzzz

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mutual sight, Mutual sound

Mutual struggle, for shared ground

It's safe, to say, they'll try to take from me

I'm just another one for them to break down

Steeped in denial, the daily grind

Dream of a world for me and my kind

It's safe in the alternative reality

So stick your standards where the sun doesn't shine

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get outta my space

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

Explain the reasons, Explain the rhymes

It's not required, inside our minds

It's safe to try, no need to justify

Or take their guilt trip at the end of the line.

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get off of my case

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

(My Own Little World)

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

It's time to go: get out of my face

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, we will never die

(Our Own Little World)

Another copy and paste

Zzzzzzz"

You seem to be very unhappy

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

"Mutual sight, Mutual sound

Mutual struggle, for shared ground

It's safe, to say, they'll try to take from me

I'm just another one for them to break down

Steeped in denial, the daily grind

Dream of a world for me and my kind

It's safe in the alternative reality

So stick your standards where the sun doesn't shine

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get outta my space

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

Explain the reasons, Explain the rhymes

It's not required, inside our minds

It's safe to try, no need to justify

Or take their guilt trip at the end of the line.

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get off of my case

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

(My Own Little World)

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

It's time to go: get out of my face

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, we will never die

(Our Own Little World)

Another copy and paste

Zzzzzzz

You seem to be very unhappy

Is that from your own experiences?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mutual sight, Mutual sound

Mutual struggle, for shared ground

It's safe, to say, they'll try to take from me

I'm just another one for them to break down

Steeped in denial, the daily grind

Dream of a world for me and my kind

It's safe in the alternative reality

So stick your standards where the sun doesn't shine

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get outta my space

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

Explain the reasons, Explain the rhymes

It's not required, inside our minds

It's safe to try, no need to justify

Or take their guilt trip at the end of the line.

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get off of my case

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

(My Own Little World)

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

It's time to go: get out of my face

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, we will never die

(Our Own Little World)

Another copy and paste

Zzzzzzz

You seem to be very unhappy

Is that from your own experiences? "

No, you just seem very negative

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

hope everyone's ok today? i'm not much support with this stuff, other stuff i can be just not got on top of this yet, but i'm also not prey so that's good.

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

"Mutual sight, Mutual sound

Mutual struggle, for shared ground

It's safe, to say, they'll try to take from me

I'm just another one for them to break down

Steeped in denial, the daily grind

Dream of a world for me and my kind

It's safe in the alternative reality

So stick your standards where the sun doesn't shine

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get outta my space

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

Explain the reasons, Explain the rhymes

It's not required, inside our minds

It's safe to try, no need to justify

Or take their guilt trip at the end of the line.

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get off of my case

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

(My Own Little World)

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

It's time to go: get out of my face

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, we will never die

(Our Own Little World)

Another copy and paste

Zzzzzzz

You seem to be very unhappy

Is that from your own experiences?

No, you just seem very negative "

Says you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mutual sight, Mutual sound

Mutual struggle, for shared ground

It's safe, to say, they'll try to take from me

I'm just another one for them to break down

Steeped in denial, the daily grind

Dream of a world for me and my kind

It's safe in the alternative reality

So stick your standards where the sun doesn't shine

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get outta my space

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

Explain the reasons, Explain the rhymes

It's not required, inside our minds

It's safe to try, no need to justify

Or take their guilt trip at the end of the line.

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get off of my case

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

(My Own Little World)

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

It's time to go: get out of my face

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, we will never die

(Our Own Little World)

Another copy and paste

Zzzzzzz

You seem to be very unhappy

Is that from your own experiences?

No, you just seem very negative

Says you! "

Yes, your forum posts are negative on the whole.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

shame i have to add this to the topic but i have always been a sex addict.

this doesn't mean i'm desperate. being female ensures there's always someone out there who wants to fuck me.

if i want sex i'm gonna choose the guy who represents himself in the best way, not just anyone who offers.

i've made a couple of bad choices when been desperate, mostly to do with my own safety. i'm even more selective now than i was before.

so again, not just anyone who offers. don't see the words sex addict and think you're luck is in. i'm a person still and expect to be treated like one.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I have a puritanical streak that stops me from having an addictive personality. I can do things for some time and in great depth and then simply stop.

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

"Mutual sight, Mutual sound

Mutual struggle, for shared ground

It's safe, to say, they'll try to take from me

I'm just another one for them to break down

Steeped in denial, the daily grind

Dream of a world for me and my kind

It's safe in the alternative reality

So stick your standards where the sun doesn't shine

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get outta my space

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

Explain the reasons, Explain the rhymes

It's not required, inside our minds

It's safe to try, no need to justify

Or take their guilt trip at the end of the line.

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

Promise the world then take it from you anyway

They'll break you down making your vision fadeaway

It's time to go: get off of my case

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, I will never die

(My Own Little World)

They're for themselves, it doesn't matter what they say

It's time to go: get out of my face

Welcome to a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Be anyone, do anything I'd ever want to try

Time doesn't exist here

Slip into a world where the air I breathe is mine

There's nothing to overwhelm me and nothing to cloud my mind

Come with me into it and you know what you will find

Time doesn't exist here, we will never die

(Our Own Little World)

Another copy and paste

Zzzzzzz

You seem to be very unhappy

Is that from your own experiences?

No, you just seem very negative

Says you!

Yes, your forum posts are negative on the whole. "

Then don't read them

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By *5happycoupleCouple
over a year ago

Tooting / dept 23 France

I know what you mean about the addiction. That buzz when you orgasm or get a man to spunk on you. When I am in the zone, for want of a better word, I can carry on like that for hours. But it is all fantasy. You don't need to have a relationship with them, argue about the washing up or the dirty socks on the floor. To some extent it can be seen a bit like the latest craze of mindfulness. At that moment in time you are totally there, in the moment, enjoying every second of it. It doesn't leave room for all the problems you try to deal with on a day to day basis. So of course it is something that feels good, something that is attractive and can be addictive. But remember that once you come down off that high, the real world is still waiting for you, still needs to be dealt with.

A support group sounds good, although obviously everyone will have their own perspective, but it is not something that you can easily discuss with vanilla friends. But at least others on Fab will have some understanding of what you are talking about, can share their own experiences and ways of dealing with things, and by asking the right questions, or just listening to you, help you see things a little bit differently. Let me know how you get on, sounds very interesting.

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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

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"I know what you mean about the addiction. That buzz when you orgasm or get a man to spunk on you. When I am in the zone, for want of a better word, I can carry on like that for hours. But it is all fantasy. You don't need to have a relationship with them, argue about the washing up or the dirty socks on the floor. To some extent it can be seen a bit like the latest craze of mindfulness. At that moment in time you are totally there, in the moment, enjoying every second of it. It doesn't leave room for all the problems you try to deal with on a day to day basis. So of course it is something that feels good, something that is attractive and can be addictive. But remember that once you come down off that high, the real world is still waiting for you, still needs to be dealt with.

i feel like i could cope with a skype group (that way people on phones or computers could join it) but only coz i am fucking everything on site/in sight.

i was the OP btw, deleted my account to make a new start.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is where it helps to have a spiritual practice, whether that's religious or more about just connecting with nature. We have lower and higher selves, the former downward looking, ever at the road of life, its hurdles and hopes, its petty challenges and tasks. The latter looks upwards and outwards, realising the self is just a small part of a sublime beautiful whole. The former is the mindset of addiction, dissatisfaction and disconnection. The latter of satisfaction and belonging. When I feel too wound up in life's addictions I try to step back and take some time to remind myself of the spiritual

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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

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i do like disconnecting and dissociating. it helps me cope with things.

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