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Advice needed

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By *.bit.of.a.perv. OP   Man
over a year ago

Dover

Looking for some advice on a potential meet.

Only joined a week ago and had more messages than I could have hoped for, so I was thinking about treating myself to a birthday (14th November) fuck. So I've asked someone (I'll respect their privacy and not say anymore about them) who messaged me a few days before, they've said yes but haven't replied to my message about meeting up first (is a complete beginner I thought it was wise not to just jump straight in) Don't want to harass this person (last thing I need is a bad reputation) but don't want to ask someone else and risk double booking (again bad reputation) so what should I do?

Sorry about the length of the post, but had to give as much info as possible so you guys see the situation.

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have they been online since you messaged ?

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By *.bit.of.a.perv. OP   Man
over a year ago

Dover

Yes message was sent 3 days ago and been online 2 days ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me personally I would message em again and say are you still up for a meet or not? If you don't find out then you might end up with neither of them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think your worrying too much personally I get loads of messages so don't reply to many if they've had loads yours maybe at the bottom so just message again

I don't do social meets first but I know some may prefer that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't bother. If you have to chase them, it's not worth it. I message nobody. If I ever see a person I'm crazy about I will but till then, fuck it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've found that some get bogged down with messages, best bet is to try n message when they online, see if that works

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

If you sent a message about a meet time and place and they haven't replied, I think they aren't interested. If it's just a break in a chat message then she'll continue when she's ready

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would wonder if she had gone off the idea, if she ever had an intention of meeting. I have a system that works for me, and that way I never end up high and dry. If she was keen to meet, she would have got back to you, I would move along to the next lady that has your interest. Sadly this site has a lot of timewasters, you need to be able to spot the signs and be able to navigate around them. Beware the ladies who are in reality men...

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By *.bit.of.a.perv. OP   Man
over a year ago

Dover

It's one of my rules, I don't have many, but meeting first is definitely the top one, it can be on the day, but I have to be comfortable with that person before any fun takes place. But I understand some don't, so each to their own.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think it's realistic to plan a 'birthday fuck' with women you've never met. Besides a lot of women would expect to meet a potential sex partner first before agreeing to have sex. Obviously I don't know the details of the situation but I'm wondering if she backed out because she felt she wasn't given the option of getting to know you first before deciding whether she liked you enough to have sex with you. I don't think you should chase her. Best thing to do is make various friends on Fab, and as and when you get a meet, whether sexual or otherwise, then just enjoy. If it happens to be on your birthday then even better.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't think it's realistic to plan a 'birthday fuck' with women you've never met. Besides a lot of women would expect to meet a potential sex partner first before agreeing to have sex. Obviously I don't know the details of the situation but I'm wondering if she backed out because she felt she wasn't given the option of getting to know you first before deciding whether she liked you enough to have sex with you. I don't think you should chase her. Best thing to do is make various friends on Fab, and as and when you get a meet, whether sexual or otherwise, then just enjoy. If it happens to be on your birthday then even better.

Mrs"

he never said it was a she, maybe He changed his mind

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By *.bit.of.a.perv. OP   Man
over a year ago

Dover

Well SHE messaged me first about sex on that day (it was about 4 days ago) so I was the one that wanted to meet first, then if all good, enjoy ourselves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You say earlier the person hasn't been online for 2 days, that suggests to me that real life is happening and so they haven't been online to check messages etc. You could try sending a message again and if no response change your plans and make new ones

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't chase after her

I chase nobody

If they are interested they know where to get in touch

Plenty people have second thoughts and do turns about meets!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also we tend to take the view that if a meet isn't confirmed and in the diary with with mobile numbers exchanged then it's not happening. So if it's not confirmed, and you can't easily get hold of her, and the ball was left in her court, then dont feel guilty about arranging something else.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well SHE messaged me first about sex on that day (it was about 4 days ago) so I was the one that wanted to meet first, then if all good, enjoy ourselves. "

Out of interest are they verified

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By *.bit.of.a.perv. OP   Man
over a year ago

Dover

No, that's one of my concerns. And not photo verified after a fair while being on the site, which is why I wanted to meet up first

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By *.bit.of.a.perv. OP   Man
over a year ago

Dover

Thanks guys and girls, nice to see a fresh little fish like me can get some solid advice. I'll see if I can catch her online in the next few days (missed her by about 20 minutes tonight) but ultimately if it happens it happens, if it don't it don't. No sense in worrying about it, the main point for me is I've finally found a place where I can be honest about who I am and what I like. Thanks to all

Ian x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thought I may try Craigslist as lots of women want a more mature

Man like me. Are they generally genuine or looking to be paid ??

Thanks

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By *ex-a-frolicsCouple
over a year ago

Brizzle

If you've never met them before how do you know they're real? If you haven't Skyped or spoken on the phone & they're not verified, then the reality is they may be fake, sadly there are many single males masquerading as women on here. We may be wrong but our advice is move on & get a meet with somebody verified.

This site sucks at times & we've had folks who stop communicating/bottle it, but are very fortunate that we've never been stood up!

Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd just plan on a " birthday wank". What could possibly go wrong?

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By *.bit.of.a.perv. OP   Man
over a year ago

Dover

Good point, spoken since then so I'll see what happens nearer the time, but what ever happens happens. No sense in worrying. Thanks for the input.

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By *ainbowBrite57Woman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Good luck and Happy Birthday

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By *.bit.of.a.perv. OP   Man
over a year ago

Dover


"Good luck and Happy Birthday"

Thanks very much

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

It is highly unusual for women to message men, even less likely for men who are new to the site and not meet verified.

I would wager some good money that the person who contacted you was a fake. Sorry OP.

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By *c-ukMan
over a year ago

Sevenoaks


"It is highly unusual for women to message men, even less likely for men who are new to the site and not meet verified.

I would wager some good money that the person who contacted you was a fake. Sorry OP. "

Agree... sounds like a dude messing with you..

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By *.bit.of.a.perv. OP   Man
over a year ago

Dover

Odd that the person's sex keeps popping up, he/she man/woman etc.

Does it matter?

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By *ex-a-frolicsCouple
over a year ago

Brizzle


"Odd that the person's sex keeps popping up, he/she man/woman etc.

Does it matter?"

I guess it doesn't if you're not worried about the sex of the person you meet, however if you thought you were meeting a woman & a guy turned up (or vice versa ) wouldn't you be peeved we certainly would!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No, that's one of my concerns. And not photo verified after a fair while being on the site, which is why I wanted to meet up first "

I would never meet unverified or no photos. Ask yourself why not? Leave it

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By *.bit.of.a.perv. OP   Man
over a year ago

Dover


"Odd that the person's sex keeps popping up, he/she man/woman etc.

Does it matter?

I guess it doesn't if you're not worried about the sex of the person you meet, however if you thought you were meeting a woman & a guy turned up (or vice versa ) wouldn't you be peeved we certainly would!!"

Hadn't thought of it like that, fair point.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Odd that the person's sex keeps popping up, he/she man/woman etc.

Does it matter?"

As your Bi and new unverified, its highly unlikely that a lady would message you, yes probably a fake,

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