FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swinging Support and Advice

Boyfriend wants me to dominate him

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I've recently acquired a new boyfriend and he's confessed to me that he's really into femdom and has been to a dominatrix in the past.

I've always considered myself to be fairly submissive but would really like to try being more dominant.

He's told me he's particularly interested in collar and lead play, spanking and restraints

Any advice for a femdom newbie?? I'm worried i'll feel a bit silly. The idea of it really turns me on though.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *astersubMan
over a year ago

Stewarton

Looking at your pics , there is no reason for you to be feeling silly. Just remember how you like to be treated when being sub , and do the same to him. That's as good a place to start as any

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

See if there are any local Fetish Events close to you so that you can meet others more experienced and learn from them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Giant strap on

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tie him up, inform him that if he wants an orgasm he'll have to make himself cum using only his imagination.

Go and make yourself a nice cup of tea and put the TV on.

Ride his face and get yourself off.

Job done.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Giant strap on "

he did mention pegging actually haha

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Tie him up, inform him that if he wants an orgasm he'll have to make himself cum using only his imagination.

Go and make yourself a nice cup of tea and put the TV on.

Ride his face and get yourself off.

Job done. "

LOVE this!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you want somebody to practice on first?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tie him up, inform him that if he wants an orgasm he'll have to make himself cum using only his imagination.

Go and make yourself a nice cup of tea and put the TV on.

Ride his face and get yourself off.

Job done. "

Job done, no need for more posts!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Try reading books like Screw The Roses Bring Me The Thorns and SM101 both of which are readily available from Amazon etc. Sit down and talk together about what you BOTH think you'd get out of going into something like this - what you'd feel comfortable doing/not doing etc.

There are some very good BDSM Checklists out there - maybe fill one of those in each (him from a sub perspective, you from a Domme one) - then compare notes, might give you a good starting point for discussion.

Maybe start off with some light play, silk restraints, blindfolds and just you taking control of sexual play and build from there.

Find some local munches (kink/BDSM friendly socials) and talk to others about this kind of play and it's various dynamics.

Keep talking between you and take it slowly, and don't worry if it's not right for you, not everyone can Dom/me just as not everyone is sub - just be prepared to talk about it openly and honestly.

Good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once put a collar and lead on a woman, walked her on all fours around my flatand made her drink from a bowl. She also sat at my feet, was spanked and punished if she wasn't obedient.

Watch videos, read books and imagination.

Find out what he wants,and go with it. We all have to start somewhere.

Enjoy your new toy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *astersubMan
over a year ago

Stewarton

[Removed by poster at 01/11/16 23:10:18]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *astersubMan
over a year ago

Stewarton

You should read some of my stories in the "stories and fantasies" forumn on here lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a lucky guy! OP - you're gorgeous! xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hocko87Man
over a year ago

dublin

I would luv u as my mistress

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks for all the advice so far guys! I really appreciate it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tie him up spend ages teasing him. Then use him for what you want

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *anklerMan
over a year ago

Suffolk

Communication is key as I'm sure you know.

he's had experience before ask him to tell you all about it. Pros and cons etc.

Think about you as a sub and what you like and require and share those thoughts with him.

You could start off by telling him that he is not allowed to touch you, kiss you or cum for 24 hrs.

Fir example and see how it goes

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *irmbutfairMan
over a year ago

newcastle upon tyne

He says he's been to a pro dome, You could find out lots from him. Hogtie him (if rope if your thing) and get him to tell you all about it (he may find the confessing in itself humiliating) you'll also find out what he paid her to do, which is a good indication of what he likes.

There are plenty of online recourses for a curious open mind to look at options of what you can do with/to him. A/ mentioned above keep lines of communication open, it's about what you're comfortable doing as much as it is him. Apart from that have fun and don't forget the safe word

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's nice to be dominated now and again.

My ex used to peg me and I enjoyed it. I enjoyed watching her get off on the power of it and how it made her feel. Made her more wet and horny and sex after was always great plus I got a better or orgasm from the prostate rub.

Go for it and embrace it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ushandkittyCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

Get him a cock cage and make him pleasure you while he's not allowed to get hard.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tie him up, inform him that if he wants an orgasm he'll have to make himself cum using only his imagination.

Go and make yourself a nice cup of tea and put the TV on.

Ride his face and get yourself off.

Job done. "

love this!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tie him up, inform him that if he wants an orgasm he'll have to make himself cum using only his imagination.

Go and make yourself a nice cup of tea and put the TV on.

Ride his face and get yourself off.

Job done. "

Haha

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oung oxon coupleCouple
over a year ago

bicester


"Giant strap on

he did mention pegging actually haha"

He will love it! X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eordie JoJoTV/TS
over a year ago

Newcastle

Get yourself a whip and a pair thigh length boots .. put some leather or PVC on .... and believe me your inner bitch comes out ..... and you will be amazed at how Dom you can become ... have a tooth brush handy (for him to clean with) and make sure he licks your heels .... good luck but most of all enjoy x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

^^^this

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nicorn hunterCouple
over a year ago

beccles


"Get yourself a whip and a pair thigh length boots .. put some leather or PVC on .... and believe me your inner bitch comes out ..... and you will be amazed at how Dom you can become ... have a tooth brush handy (for him to clean with) and make sure he licks your heels .... good luck but most of all enjoy x "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lucky bugger that your seriously considering it! Maybe you could tie him up, let other guys pleasure and fuck ur holes and cum dump all over u and make him watch as he's tied to a chair with your bras and gagged with your sticky knickers!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iberatedPairCouple
over a year ago

Suffolk


"Lucky bugger that your seriously considering it! Maybe you could tie him up, let other guys pleasure and fuck ur holes and cum dump all over u and make him watch as he's tied to a chair with your bras and gagged with your sticky knickers!!"

L. You know who's first in the queue for this one don't you

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orks funMan
over a year ago

Sheffield

If it doesnt come natural then its not gonna flow or feel right imo

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Lucky bugger that your seriously considering it! Maybe you could tie him up, let other guys pleasure and fuck ur holes and cum dump all over u and make him watch as he's tied to a chair with your bras and gagged with your sticky knickers!!

L. You know who's first in the queue for this one don't you "

Haha let me think.....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is some crazy shit *sips tea*

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey stranger. . you would make a good DOM if the idear turns you on yoyr half way there

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ingle ex cuckMan
over a year ago

chester

Make him wear a chastity lock like mine and put the lock on yourself with a keys he hasn't touched

Leave him wearing it for 10 days

And then you will notice him doing absolutely everything for you and he will be like a lap dog at your beck n call

X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey stranger. . you would make a good DOM if the idear turns you on yoyr half way there "

Who's that targeted at?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tie him up spend ages teasing him. Then use him for what you want "

Agreed! I played the femdom for the first time the other night. I had done some research and got some ideas which made me more confident.

I made him kneel in front of me take off my knickers then put them in his mouth while I and cuffed him.

A few gentle slaps and a riding crop usually sets the scene. He was soon doing as he was told!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Get yourself a whip and a pair thigh length boots .. put some leather or PVC on .... and believe me your inner bitch comes out ..... and you will be amazed at how Dom you can become ... have a tooth brush handy (for him to clean with) and make sure he licks your heels .... good luck but most of all enjoy x "

What does he clean with the toothbrush?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *astpoetMan
over a year ago

where the world takes me

Tell him that you're both going shopping then take him to a sex shop.

When you're there get him to pick out some sexy and slutty lingerie but tell him it'll be for him to wear.

Then you pick a collar and lead, and maybe a strap on if you don't have one.

Send him up to the counter to pay for it alone so that the staff know it's all for him.

Once you get him force him to dress in the lingerie for you and when he has collar him and parade him around the house.

Then start to treat yourself, put on the porn you like (putting on gay porn is good especially if you make him watch it and play with himself).

Try and avoid cliched phrases as they'll just make you feel cringey but ask him if he likes being your little bitch and tease him but don't let him cum.

I'd also suggest making sure he pleasures you before he gets anything for himself, and if you're going to peg him get him to suck the strap on first and ask him if he likes and if really wants a real cock.

Basically just me naughty and go with a lot of your filthiest ideas because he'll have to comply.

Above all enjoy it, he's a damn, damn lucky man

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eordie JoJoTV/TS
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Get yourself a whip and a pair thigh length boots .. put some leather or PVC on .... and believe me your inner bitch comes out ..... and you will be amazed at how Dom you can become ... have a tooth brush handy (for him to clean with) and make sure he licks your heels .... good luck but most of all enjoy x

What does he clean with the toothbrush?"

Everywhere you tell him too .... skirtingboards, floor... bathroom and kitchen tiles ...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mrs N is a Sub too and is not a natural dominatrix at all. I end up instructing her what to do all the time and that defeats the object a bit doesn't it LOL.

Good luck and be strong. Have a safe word in place and push him to his limit. He will love it or decide it's not for him.

As a final anecdote we had a young guy round a while back and Mrs N agreed to be my sex slave. We put a safe word in place but I never got her anywhere near it. She is just soooooooo Sub LOL. I think she actually loves being totally dominated and told exactly what to do etc etc.


"Lucky bugger that your seriously considering it! Maybe you could tie him up, let other guys pleasure and fuck ur holes and cum dump all over u and make him watch as he's tied to a chair with your bras and gagged with your sticky knickers!!"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ast_jjMan
over a year ago

Dublin and London


"Mrs N is a Sub too and is not a natural dominatrix at all. I end up instructing her what to do all the time and that defeats the object a bit doesn't it LOL.

Good luck and be strong. Have a safe word in place and push him to his limit. He will love it or decide it's not for him.

As a final anecdote we had a young guy round a while back and Mrs N agreed to be my sex slave. We put a safe word in place but I never got her anywhere near it. She is just soooooooo Sub LOL. I think she actually loves being totally dominated and told exactly what to do etc etc.

Lucky bugger that your seriously considering it! Maybe you could tie him up, let other guys pleasure and fuck ur holes and cum dump all over u and make him watch as he's tied to a chair with your bras and gagged with your sticky knickers!!"

Now tat would be so much fun and a challenge..trying to push her to her safe word!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olo199Man
over a year ago

sheffield


"I've recently acquired a new boyfriend and he's confessed to me that he's really into femdom and has been to a dominatrix in the past.

I've always considered myself to be fairly submissive but would really like to try being more dominant.

He's told me he's particularly interested in collar and lead play, spanking and restraints

Any advice for a femdom newbie?? I'm worried i'll feel a bit silly. The idea of it really turns me on though. "

Your boyfriend has got a keeper in you then that's he cam be confident in even opening up about that..cos let me tel ya am not shy one bit but when it comes to our own fantasys you can't just open up about that cos like ya say you feel silky if there not into all that...hence that is why am on here and getting bored off same old women who are stunning looking size 8 and need to switch light off when it's sexy time...its like come on where all adults where not on playground now where if you sleep with someone your a slag..forget that everyone has there own fantasys and finding the lady to be open like that is hard to come by...so my advice is give it a go by making it a joke and a bit off role play I.è dress as a police officer and when he not expecting it hand cuff him and do what you dream off cos end a day nobody gunna judge and if you don't like it at least you can talk about it later on in your life and say Yeh we tryed that!! so go for it girl tue him up and make memories!! its wickid trust me...Al talk more in death if you want ideas in private msg...trust me he will love ya for Eva!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ink and inkedCouple
over a year ago

Essex

I'm pretty good at this we both like to switch being sub or Dom

The key thing is to talk about the things you like even if you think your partner might be a bit shocked just both agree open minds ... then when you start to experiment you will find more comes out ... we have discovered things we never knew about ourselves let alone each other

I never thought riding his face and telling him he's a dirty bastard would get me off ... but it does

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

[Removed by poster at 04/11/16 18:27:11]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed


"I'm pretty good at this we both like to switch being sub or Dom

The key thing is to talk about the things you like even if you think your partner might be a bit shocked just both agree open minds ... then when you start to experiment you will find more comes out ... we have discovered things we never knew about ourselves let alone each other

I never thought riding his face and telling him he's a dirty bastard would get me off ... but it does

"

This is key talk and be open to the weird.

Let's pick something really weird.

Let's say his wildest fantasy is to be strangled until he passes out. He may not want to actually act it out and it may repulse you, but if you can share fantasies without feeling compelled to judge or act on every suggestion then you will find what meets both your desires.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittletonCplCouple
over a year ago

cannock


"I've recently acquired a new boyfriend and he's confessed to me that he's really into femdom and has been to a dominatrix in the past.

I've always considered myself to be fairly submissive but would really like to try being more dominant.

He's told me he's particularly interested in collar and lead play, spanking and restraints

Any advice for a femdom newbie?? I'm worried i'll feel a bit silly. The idea of it really turns me on though. "

I'd love to be dominated by you also ..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *100Man
over a year ago

Essex


"I've recently acquired a new boyfriend and he's confessed to me that he's really into femdom and has been to a dominatrix in the past.

I've always considered myself to be fairly submissive but would really like to try being more dominant.

He's told me he's particularly interested in collar and lead play, spanking and restraints

Any advice for a femdom newbie?? I'm worried i'll feel a bit silly. The idea of it really turns me on though.

I'd love to be dominated by you also ..

"

You can practice on me anytime you like it sounds like great fun.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top