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How to get wife into swinging

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hi been try and thinking of how to get the wife into swinging and make her think it's her idea. Any advice grateful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well, she's your wife - if you have any respect for her then you know best how to talk to her.... why ask us?

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By *ngeluk69Woman
over a year ago

Near enough

Show her your profile and verifications... I'm sure she will be chomping at the bit and won't hesitate to get involved

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well, she's your wife - if you have any respect for her then you know best how to talk to her.... why ask us?

"

Agree completely, to swing together needs trust, not trickery!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Show her your profile and verifications... I'm sure she will be chomping at the bit and won't hesitate to get involved "

Yes that should do it, without a doubt!

XX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How do you think she will react knowing you already have a profile? If my fella had done that and we weren't open enough to talk about it before you set it up I'd be very peed off. Trust and openess comes first so I would delete your profile, do the talking and then do it together. Good luck

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"Hi been try and thinking of how to get the wife into swinging and make her think it's her idea. Any advice grateful "

What would you be hoping to swap for her?

Cal

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed


"Hi been try and thinking of how to get the wife into swinging and make her think it's her idea. Any advice grateful "

Contact Darren Brown.

Let me reword this sentence to show why is just wrong.

Hi been try and thinking of how to get the husband into gay sex and make him think it's his idea. Any advice grateful.

The point is you can't or shouldn't try to control, manipulate or groom anyone, especially someone you publically stated to love more than any other.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best thing to do is speak to her and ask her. But be prepared to lose her.

There must be mutual trust first and both parties must be totally ready for it.

Although I've not personally witnessed it I've heard about a few people freaking out when seeing there other half with someone else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She is

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By *helonewolfMan
over a year ago

Teesside

Has she given you any indication that she might be interested in the lifestyle? If not then don't pressure her into something she doesn't want. In fact the real question is why are YOU on here?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shagging women behind her back and nkw wanting to manipulate her into shagging other guys you sound like a real catch i feel for your poor wife

Mr

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

I am sure for most couples, one had the idea first and 'manipulated' the other into it. Now these very couples are moaning about the OP. How quickly people forget .... let's see some honesty here. Oh yes, we met on here and were both on the scene already.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll mention to her when I see her tonight!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know your wife. If it's not her thing it is totally wrong to pressure her into doing what she isn't keen to do.

I would wait and see if she herself shows an interest.

Has to come from her - not you

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By *LUKCouple
over a year ago

Loughborough


"I am sure for most couples, one had the idea first and 'manipulated' the other into it. Now these very couples are moaning about the OP. How quickly people forget .... let's see some honesty here. Oh yes, we met on here and were both on the scene already."

You're 'sure' about that? That from experience of talking to other couples or just pulled out of your arse?

It's actually a conversation we've had with many couples and the majority we've spoke to the answer is "X mentioned it one night, Y thought it sounded very horny so X and Y went to a club/looked online".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am sure for most couples, one had the idea first and 'manipulated' the other into it. Now these very couples are moaning about the OP. How quickly people forget .... let's see some honesty here. Oh yes, we met on here and were both on the scene already."

No manipulation over her the wife brought it up and i thought the idea was hot if you need to manipulate your partner at all it cant be a particularly great relationship

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"I am sure for most couples, one had the idea first and 'manipulated' the other into it. Now these very couples are moaning about the OP. How quickly people forget .... let's see some honesty here. Oh yes, we met on here and were both on the scene already.

You're 'sure' about that? That from experience of talking to other couples or just pulled out of your arse?

It's actually a conversation we've had with many couples and the majority we've spoke to the answer is "X mentioned it one night, Y thought it sounded very horny so X and Y went to a club/looked online"."

I am sure, yes, and don't think you are the only one who speaks to other couples. I don't pull things out of my arse .... and I am not abusive or rude on the forums, unlike some. Disagree, but do you have to be so rude? Obviously touched a raw nerve somewhere?

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By *LUKCouple
over a year ago

Loughborough


"

I am sure, yes, and don't think you are the only one who speaks to other couples. I don't pull things out of my arse .... and I am not abusive or rude on the forums, unlike some. Disagree, but do you have to be so rude? Obviously touched a raw nerve somewhere? "

So you've spoke to couples and, in the majority of cases, one of them has openly admitted to manipulating their partner into swinging?

Really?

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"

I am sure, yes, and don't think you are the only one who speaks to other couples. I don't pull things out of my arse .... and I am not abusive or rude on the forums, unlike some. Disagree, but do you have to be so rude? Obviously touched a raw nerve somewhere?

So you've spoke to couples and, in the majority of cases, one of them has openly admitted to manipulating their partner into swinging?

Really?"

One has said they had to persuade the other. They had the idea first and the other wasn't so keen. there's plenty advice on the forums about how to do this too ....its is unlikely both will think of. it at exactly the same time.

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By *LUKCouple
over a year ago

Loughborough

So one couple?

So because one couple that you've spoken to have done that, you have gleaned that the majority of couples on here must have too?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Hi been try and thinking of how to get the wife into swinging and make her think it's her idea. Any advice grateful "

Don't is my advice.

Instead sit down one evening when you know you won't be disturbed and tell her you would like to open your sex life up to include other people. If she is at all receptive to the idea take things slowly, answer every question she asks honestly and listen to her. If she is completely against the idea nothing will make her think she's come up with it herself.

It can oddly be very difficult to be open and honest with the person you love best but trust me it is the only way forward.

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By *iforfun999Man
over a year ago

Haverfordwest

Try praising her and giving a small treat, every time she mentions sex. Soon she will be trained to mention so more often, leading to bigger treats when she suggests a third person.

Maybe that only works when training pets and not when having an open and honest relationship with a partner. I'm no expert on the training part, the open and honest relationship is what works for me, no secrets, everything out in the open.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"So one couple?

So because one couple that you've spoken to have done that, you have gleaned that the majority of couples on here must have too?

"

No, sorry, let me rephrase it .... of all the couples we have spoken to, maybe twenty to thirty, one of the pair (husband or wife, usually husband) had said they had to persuade the other. I am not so simple as to take the word of one to represent all. They were being honest rather than say, we both had the same brainwave at the same time.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"Try praising her and giving a small treat, every time she mentions sex. Soon she will be trained to mention so more often, leading to bigger treats when she suggests a third person.

Maybe that only works when training pets and not when having an open and honest relationship with a partner. I'm no expert on the training part, the open and honest relationship is what works for me, no secrets, everything out in the open. "

Glad you mentioned the pets thing, because that is exactly what I was thinking. Doesn't work on cats though ...

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By *LUKCouple
over a year ago

Loughborough


"

No, sorry, let me rephrase it .... of all the couples we have spoken to, maybe twenty to thirty, one of the pair (husband or wife, usually husband) had said they had to persuade the other. I am not so simple as to take the word of one to represent all. They were being honest rather than say, we both had the same brainwave at the same time."

We've spoken to dozens over the years and never heard a couple say that one of them had to manipulate the other into swinging.

I'd be interested if there's any couples on here that would be glad to admit that in this thread.

Or even if there's any other couples out there that have ever heard a couple openly admit to that.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"

No, sorry, let me rephrase it .... of all the couples we have spoken to, maybe twenty to thirty, one of the pair (husband or wife, usually husband) had said they had to persuade the other. I am not so simple as to take the word of one to represent all. They were being honest rather than say, we both had the same brainwave at the same time.

We've spoken to dozens over the years and never heard a couple say that one of them had to manipulate the other into swinging.

I'd be interested if there's any couples on here that would be glad to admit that in this thread.

Or even if there's any other couples out there that have ever heard a couple openly admit to that."

Why stop at couples who have heard other couples saying they have heard other couples saying one had to persuade the other? I think some singles will have heard someone from a couple saying this ... I want to hear from singles too

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By *tarbeckCouple
over a year ago

york


"

No, sorry, let me rephrase it .... of all the couples we have spoken to, maybe twenty to thirty, one of the pair (husband or wife, usually husband) had said they had to persuade the other. I am not so simple as to take the word of one to represent all. They were being honest rather than say, we both had the same brainwave at the same time.

We've spoken to dozens over the years and never heard a couple say that one of them had to manipulate the other into swinging.

I'd be interested if there's any couples on here that would be glad to admit that in this thread.

Or even if there's any other couples out there that have ever heard a couple openly admit to that."
Not manipulated here and would hate to think we were meeting somebody that had been xxx

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

Let's try this ... has anyone ever seen a couple at a club or party where one or the other of them is obviously enjoying it more than the other, or worse still is looking plain terrified? Or how about having a meet where one of the couple was so obviously not into it?

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By *tarbeckCouple
over a year ago

york


"Let's try this ... has anyone ever seen a couple at a club or party where one or the other of them is obviously enjoying it more than the other, or worse still is looking plain terrified? Or how about having a meet where one of the couple was so obviously not into it? "
Not any of the friends we have met , maybe we are just a good judge of who we meet x

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

Not only those you have met, but those you have seen. Its possible the couple move along in their swinging journey and the reluctant partner comes to like is as much as the instigator does, but at the start, they would have had to be persuaded.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hey, I was wondering if you'd be interested in having sex with people other than me?"

No need to manipulate her into it. Just ask.

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By *tarbeckCouple
over a year ago

york


"Not only those you have met, but those you have seen. Its possible the couple move along in their swinging journey and the reluctant partner comes to like is as much as the instigator does, but at the start, they would have had to be persuaded."
People we have met took a fantasy to the next step without any persation , like us

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What are your reasons for getting her involved? Is it so that you don't have to hide your activities anymore? Because you want to see someone shag her to appease some of your guilt? You're hoping she's bisexual so you can fulfil a fantasy? By the tone of your post and also your profile seems you don't hold much regard for the 1 you love and promised to be faithful to if you think she'd be that stupid to manipulated into swinging and think it was her idea all along. Need to decide what is more important your marriage or swinging

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By *sym45Man
over a year ago

JE2

Jeez you've landed yourself in here matey !

I'm not gonna jump on the bandwagon and have a go.Dont think some people know how frustrating it can be.

First thing to do is cancel your Profile etc from here as you are effectively cheating.

Then over a glass of wine in a relaxed atmosphere somewhere.Quite simply ask her what she thinks about swinging ? If the reaction/comments are somewhat positive ask her if she would ever consider it ? If so an initial "NO SEX" visit to the Local Swingers Club.

See where you go from there.If not then accept it.Good luck...

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By *iforfun999Man
over a year ago

Haverfordwest


"Try praising her and giving a small treat, every time she mentions sex. Soon she will be trained to mention so more often, leading to bigger treats when she suggests a third person.

Maybe that only works when training pets and not when having an open and honest relationship with a partner. I'm no expert on the training part, the open and honest relationship is what works for me, no secrets, everything out in the open.

Glad you mentioned the pets thing, because that is exactly what I was thinking. Doesn't work on cats though ..."

Oh yes it does. Only none of mine ever needed a treat to be trained, just praise.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"Try praising her and giving a small treat, every time she mentions sex. Soon she will be trained to mention so more often, leading to bigger treats when she suggests a third person.

Maybe that only works when training pets and not when having an open and honest relationship with a partner. I'm no expert on the training part, the open and honest relationship is what works for me, no secrets, everything out in the open.

Glad you mentioned the pets thing, because that is exactly what I was thinking. Doesn't work on cats though ...

Oh yes it does. Only none of mine ever needed a treat to be trained, just praise. "

My cats do their own thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi been try and thinking of how to get the wife into swinging and make her think it's her idea. Any advice grateful "

when you next have naughty fun, when she is in a naughty mood ask her if she has any fantasys she would like to try, promise her you will not be shocked and help her in anyway you can to help her fullfill them what ever they maybe,

you should then both benefit from the fun that may ensue from this even if it does not lead to swinging,

be warned, she may ask for something that you do not like so it may bite you in the ass, but a promise is a promise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd imagine with most couples instead of having a eureka moment whereby they both have the same idea at the same time, its more organic and starts with talking about fantasies; with some couples it will grow into swinging, and others will remain fantasies.

I can't understand why some people seem to find it so hard to discuss fantasies and sexual desires with their partners, it never occurred to me that I couldn't tell Fred that I was sexually attracted to women.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe an Etch a Sketch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cut to the chase....get her a bbc....you do clean up....its a win win situation. ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wonder if after sneaking around behind her back on here and cheating on her she might agree to swinging? Wow. Just wow! I dont judge people on here if they are here for a bit on the side. But to come on a forum and ask people how to convince her to join and to make her think it was her idea?

Mr

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

A hit and run thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi been try and thinking of how to get the wife into swinging and make her think it's her idea. Any advice grateful "

Why would you want her to think it was her idea? Man up, ask her outright, and take responsibility for the fact that you want to try swinging with her. Manipulating your wife like that is just plain wrong. Cheating on her is not enough? Now you want to try and be even sneakier by trying to put it on her? The best way to handle it, is to be honest, and ask what her thoughts are on the subject. I think you've deceived her enough to be honest OP.

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By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman
over a year ago

stourbridge area

Be careful what u wish for OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

take her to a club telling her it's a normal nightclub?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Talk to her honestly and openly; failing that put her in touch with one of the four profiles who have verified you and let them tell her all about it. I'm sure she'll have her own ideas about it after that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi been try and thinking of how to get the wife into swinging and make her think it's her idea. Any advice grateful "

What you're talking about is called 'inception' and is the hardest of all things to plant as it has to seem like the subject thought of it themselves. What you need is a way of getting into your wife's dreams and a crack team...

Beard

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By *raceytvcdTV/TS
over a year ago

mansfield


"Hi been try and thinking of how to get the wife into swinging and make her think it's her idea. Any advice grateful "
just be a man about it and ask her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi been try and thinking of how to get the wife into swinging and make her think it's her idea. Any advice grateful just be a man about it and ask her "

Well said!

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