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equal sharing when swinging

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By *ood friends OP   Couple
over a year ago

york

does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

How can years U focus n what you are doing if Yu spend time checking if everyone else is involved or finished already?

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By *oandjohnCouple
over a year ago

South Wales, will travel to Hereford, Worcestershire and Shropshire

No... Just go with the flow... Some days you win and some days you loose.. We never expect anything and what happens will happen.. We have been to parties where one of us has had lots of attention and the other didn't.. Other parties it is the other way around..

Look at it this way: A woman will far out last a man in a group situation... So a male might not keep up...

The key is to not over think things.. Chill out and enjoy what ever happens

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No... Just go with the flow... Some days you win and some days you loose.. We never expect anything and what happens will happen.. We have been to parties where one of us has had lots of attention and the other didn't.. Other parties it is the other way around..

Look at it this way: A woman will far out last a man in a group situation... So a male might not keep up...

The key is to not over think things.. Chill out and enjoy what ever happens"

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you take a stopwatch and keep time sheets?! Sounds like a passion killer.....

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

No.

When I play as a couple with hubby I quite ofter found myself sitting there quietly chatting with the other man after he had finished while waiting for my OH to finish with the lady.

Are you suggesting that just because the bloke I am playing with has no stamina that my husband should pull out before he has reached his happy ending?

I can't see this going down well with him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No.

When I play as a couple with hubby I quite ofter found myself sitting there quietly chatting with the other man after he had finished while waiting for my OH to finish with the lady.

Are you suggesting that just because the bloke I am playing with has no stamina that my husband should pull out before he has reached his happy ending?

I can't see this going down well with him "
i have the same thing happen.. although in clubs quite often the guy actually then basically just takes his mrs away and thats the end of that.

However to the op.. I dont do 121 in any situation but when we did I found that id be waiting a long time for mr to finish...

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes."

I think that you should agree on your rules and boundaries and discuss them with people you meet. I don't think it matters what the people you aren't going to meet think, you must play in a way that you're comfortable with or it isn't worth doing and if you find only a few people want to do that so be it.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"No.

When I play as a couple with hubby I quite ofter found myself sitting there quietly chatting with the other man after he had finished while waiting for my OH to finish with the lady.

Are you suggesting that just because the bloke I am playing with has no stamina that my husband should pull out before he has reached his happy ending?

I can't see this going down well with him "

I agree. If you are truly in the zone, then you are in the zone. I fear it smacks of some insecurity if you always have your attention on who else is doing what else and for how long?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If we are meeting a couple then we all play or none of us do, however if one finshes then its fine for the other to carry on for however long whether it be as a mf mmf or a ffm. . A bit selfish to have your fun and expect everyone else to stop... A 10 min breather and ready to go again lol

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes."

No

The last time we played it was clear that the other lady was not as keen on me as she was on the wife.

I'm not going to stop them having fun just because she prefers the wife to me.

It's about doing what you're comfortable with. I'm more than happy to watch or play with just my Mrs. Insisting on equal levels of involvement is unrealistic and somewhat mechanical.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes."

Yes, it's not that difficult.

This is why we avoid couples where their profile bangs on about wanting a single woman...

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By *ostafunMan
over a year ago

near ipswich


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

I think that you should agree on your rules and boundaries and discuss them with people you meet. I don't think it matters what the people you aren't going to meet think, you must play in a way that you're comfortable with or it isn't worth doing and if you find only a few people want to do that so be it."

exactly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

Yes, it's not that difficult.

This is why we avoid couples where their profile bangs on about wanting a single woman... "

We tend to avoid those to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes."

Since I get off seeing my wife having fun , I so don't agree at all .

I prefer being left out

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By *ishopstippleMan
over a year ago

Purley

I think you need to be more realistic about things.

If you enjoy see your FB enjoying them-self with someone else, and your enjoying yourself because of it, then that all you can expect. You have to accept that different people have their own timings otherwise you could find one of you getting bitter- that will lead to a destructive downturn. FB relationships should be about mutual fun and respect, your not going to have a "perfect foursome" everytime.

Just discuss your feelings and bounderies openly. FB relationships can be enlightening, because you don't get the baggage that other type of relationships can.

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By *ishopstippleMan
over a year ago

Purley


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

Yes, it's not that difficult.

This is why we avoid couples where their profile bangs on about wanting a single woman... "

Why single out couples that want single women? in my experience single guys and couples can be just as selfish or running personal agenda's.

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World


"No.

When I play as a couple with hubby I quite ofter found myself sitting there quietly chatting with the other man after he had finished while waiting for my OH to finish with the lady.

Are you suggesting that just because the bloke I am playing with has no stamina that my husband should pull out before he has reached his happy ending?

I can't see this going down well with him i have the same thing happen.. although in clubs quite often the guy actually then basically just takes his mrs away and thats the end of that.

"

Yep had that as well. He emptied his ball, fuck anyone else.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I think what lots of people don't realise is that there isn't a right or wrong way to do this, there's only your way. Of course it needs to be legal and consensual and the people you meet need to be on the same page but it truly doesn't matter if 99% of other people don't want to do it your way you still have 2% who do

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I think what lots of people don't realise is that there isn't a right or wrong way to do this, there's only your way. Of course it needs to be legal and consensual and the people you meet need to be on the same page but it truly doesn't matter if 99% of other people don't want to do it your way you still have 2% who do "

Or even 1%

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes."

If one of the blokes has had enough then why not help the other woman with the other guy instead of just sitting there?

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon


"No... Just go with the flow... Some days you win and some days you loose.. We never expect anything and what happens will happen.. We have been to parties where one of us has had lots of attention and the other didn't.. Other parties it is the other way around..

Look at it this way: A woman will far out last a man in a group situation... So a male might not keep up...

The key is to not over think things.. Chill out and enjoy what ever happens"

Nail on the head.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes."

I think you should be discussing how it makes you feel with your partner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

Yes, it's not that difficult.

This is why we avoid couples where their profile bangs on about wanting a single woman...

Why single out couples that want single women? in my experience single guys and couples can be just as selfish or running personal agenda's."

Because the way they bang on about it on their profile is a giveaway sign. "We're looking for that elusive unicorn because my Mrs is soo bi and loves the touch of another woman... but we'll put up with a couple if we can't find one".

Do you have any give away signs of a selfish single guy or couple that don't want single women?

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

Yes, it's not that difficult.

This is why we avoid couples where their profile bangs on about wanting a single woman...

Why single out couples that want single women? in my experience single guys and couples can be just as selfish or running personal agenda's.

Because the way they bang on about it on their profile is a giveaway sign. "We're looking for that elusive unicorn because my Mrs is soo bi and loves the touch of another woman... but we'll put up with a couple if we can't find one".

Do you have any give away signs of a selfish single guy or couple that don't want single women? "

Huh huh....

;-)

S

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

Yes, it's not that difficult.

This is why we avoid couples where their profile bangs on about wanting a single woman...

Why single out couples that want single women? in my experience single guys and couples can be just as selfish or running personal agenda's.

Because the way they bang on about it on their profile is a giveaway sign. "We're looking for that elusive unicorn because my Mrs is soo bi and loves the touch of another woman... but we'll put up with a couple if we can't find one".

Do you have any give away signs of a selfish single guy or couple that don't want single women? "

Surely that's just being up front and honest.

We are not all wired the same. Just like some want fullswap or soft swap.

Some married ladies prefer meets with bi women.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

Yes, it's not that difficult.

This is why we avoid couples where their profile bangs on about wanting a single woman...

Why single out couples that want single women? in my experience single guys and couples can be just as selfish or running personal agenda's.

Because the way they bang on about it on their profile is a giveaway sign. "We're looking for that elusive unicorn because my Mrs is soo bi and loves the touch of another woman... but we'll put up with a couple if we can't find one".

Do you have any give away signs of a selfish single guy or couple that don't want single women?

Surely that's just being up front and honest.

We are not all wired the same. Just like some want fullswap or soft swap.

Some married ladies prefer meets with bi women. "

Up front and honest about what? Preferring a single woman to a couple? No problem but we're not here to be anyone's second choice!

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By *ishopstippleMan
over a year ago

Purley


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

Yes, it's not that difficult.

This is why we avoid couples where their profile bangs on about wanting a single woman...

Why single out couples that want single women? in my experience single guys and couples can be just as selfish or running personal agenda's.

Because the way they bang on about it on their profile is a giveaway sign. "We're looking for that elusive unicorn because my Mrs is soo bi and loves the touch of another woman... but we'll put up with a couple if we can't find one". "

Arh. Now I understand what you were trying to say. Been there done that.


"

Do you have any give away signs of a selfish single guy or couple that don't want single women? "

Sometimes its the way they write their profile or what they say (all ego driven) otherwise ive found you don't find out till your more than half way through playing. when you discover what they said before play, was not true

This swinging thing ain't simple!

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed


"

Up front and honest about what? Preferring a single woman to a couple? No problem but we're not here to be anyone's second choice! "

It's not about 1St or 2nd choices. It's just about being clear about preferences.

Last meet we had, Bunny was involved with both males and females. But she does not always want that. Sometimes she just wants the feel of a woman. Occasionally just the man.

It would be a nonsense to say anyone is first or second as it depends on the mood and chemistry.

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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago

Wakefield


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes."

Yes certainly while we are at it why not take a ruler to ensure each guy only penetrates the same depth (don't want anyone getting too much).

Sorry but swinging is about fun and enjoyment being able to relax and watch one's partner fucking or being fucked whilst you fuck or are fucked by someone else.

Haveing to stop because the other couple finished first would kill the meet for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

Yes, it's not that difficult.

This is why we avoid couples where their profile bangs on about wanting a single woman...

Why single out couples that want single women? in my experience single guys and couples can be just as selfish or running personal agenda's.

Because the way they bang on about it on their profile is a giveaway sign. "We're looking for that elusive unicorn because my Mrs is soo bi and loves the touch of another woman... but we'll put up with a couple if we can't find one".

Do you have any give away signs of a selfish single guy or couple that don't want single women?

Surely that's just being up front and honest.

We are not all wired the same. Just like some want fullswap or soft swap.

Some married ladies prefer meets with bi women.

Up front and honest about what? Preferring a single woman to a couple? No problem but we're not here to be anyone's second choice! "

I totally get where you are coming from/ When I was meeting as a couple we encountered couples who clearly thought that the easiest wy to an FFM was meet a couple for a 4sum and then sideline the other bloke

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best way would be to make sure you all enjoyed it...sex doesn't have to go on for hours or multiple times for it to be fantastic. As a couple we only do mfm we can't really say that everyone has to be equal as it's 2 men one female and the husbands straight so the female definitely gets more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Up front and honest about what? Preferring a single woman to a couple? No problem but we're not here to be anyone's second choice!

It's not about 1St or 2nd choices. It's just about being clear about preferences.

Last meet we had, Bunny was involved with both males and females. But she does not always want that. Sometimes she just wants the feel of a woman. Occasionally just the man.

It would be a nonsense to say anyone is first or second as it depends on the mood and chemistry.

"

OK, our clear preference is for couples who are equally interested in full swap with opposite sex partners. If they occassionally have moods that aren't of this nature then there are other couples more suitable for them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"does anyone out there agree with me that when swinging things should be equally shared ? For example, any one on one shouldn't last too long and no one should be left out ? This has caused a problem with foursomes.

Yes, it's not that difficult.

This is why we avoid couples where their profile bangs on about wanting a single woman...

Why single out couples that want single women? in my experience single guys and couples can be just as selfish or running personal agenda's.

Because the way they bang on about it on their profile is a giveaway sign. "We're looking for that elusive unicorn because my Mrs is soo bi and loves the touch of another woman... but we'll put up with a couple if we can't find one".

Do you have any give away signs of a selfish single guy or couple that don't want single women?

Surely that's just being up front and honest.

We are not all wired the same. Just like some want fullswap or soft swap.

Some married ladies prefer meets with bi women.

Up front and honest about what? Preferring a single woman to a couple? No problem but we're not here to be anyone's second choice!

I totally get where you are coming from/ When I was meeting as a couple we encountered couples who clearly thought that the easiest wy to an FFM was meet a couple for a 4sum and then sideline the other bloke"

Exactly, and having been through this experience, one starts to spot predictable phrases then tend to write on their profiles. If one avoids them, it reduces the probability of being in this situation.

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By *ilandlarryCouple
over a year ago

more north lincs than mids!

We have actually played with a couple and their single fem friend, and the wife of the couple counted their orgasms. Why you would put that pressure on yourself and others is beyond me.

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed


"We have actually played with a couple and their single fem friend, and the wife of the couple counted their orgasms. Why you would put that pressure on yourself and others is beyond me. "

Not being funny but how did she count them?

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed


"We have actually played with a couple and their single fem friend, and the wife of the couple counted their orgasms. Why you would put that pressure on yourself and others is beyond me.

Not being funny but how did she count them?

Also did she attach probes to find out the magnitude.

"

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By *lowercandyWoman
over a year ago

Lancashire

I'm not sure how you would work it... your profile says you are happy with same room or separate room swap.

Sounds like hard work rather than fun to be "monitoring " what the other two are doing.

As a couple we used to just go with the flow. If one "couple " finished first then there's nothing wrong with that surely.

You have to do what works for you though I think maybe you could be over thinking this a little

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By *ilandlarryCouple
over a year ago

more north lincs than mids!


"We have actually played with a couple and their single fem friend, and the wife of the couple counted their orgasms. Why you would put that pressure on yourself and others is beyond me.

Not being funny but how did she count them?

"

They discussed it between them. Conversations went along the lines of 'how many have you had? 3, ok well I've had 4 so you can have another one and then it's my turn with him.'

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed


"We have actually played with a couple and their single fem friend, and the wife of the couple counted their orgasms. Why you would put that pressure on yourself and others is beyond me.

Not being funny but how did she count them?

They discussed it between them. Conversations went along the lines of 'how many have you had? 3, ok well I've had 4 so you can have another one and then it's my turn with him.'"

Hilarious.

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales


"We have actually played with a couple and their single fem friend, and the wife of the couple counted their orgasms. Why you would put that pressure on yourself and others is beyond me.

Not being funny but how did she count them?

They discussed it between them. Conversations went along the lines of 'how many have you had? 3, ok well I've had 4 so you can have another one and then it's my turn with him.'"

No, Surely not? it's supposed to be liberating not an interview with the Stasi!

So what happens when one female comes easily by penetrative sex & the other doesn't at all?..Why not just have half time and a referee to count them?

S

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By *inkySlinkyCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

A woman said she could only orgasm with masturbation. However her partner told her that when they have sex he can feel her orgasaming so she is actually having one even though she doesn't realise it herself! Hmmmm.

SallyS

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If we are meeting a couple then we all play or none of us do, however if one finshes then its fine for the other to carry on for however long whether it be as a mf mmf or a ffm. . A bit selfish to have your fun and expect everyone else to stop... A 10 min breather and ready to go again lol"

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"A woman said she could only orgasm with masturbation. However her partner told her that when they have sex he can feel her orgasaming so she is actually having one even though she doesn't realise it herself! Hmmmm.

SallyS"

one of them is deluded and I think I know which one.

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By *iggles and BeardyCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

We just go with the flow. Since I'm pretty sure most couples are only interested in wiggles anyway and she pays me plenty of attention regardless.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why on earth do some people on here take things so seriously!!! It's supposed to be fun FFS!

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By *andomfodCouple
over a year ago

walsall

The only aspect we agree in is that we both play or none do. If that is in an mmf, an mff or a group situation then so be it. Obviously we wouldn't expect a straight male to be interested in me or a straight girl to be interested in N, but only ask we aren't excluded from play. Anything above that, just relax go with the flow and enjoy! I discovered in our first session at chams how much I enjoy watching N with another guy or girl.

B

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