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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why???" Yes we've had this,decided on a guy because he met our criteria and polite in messages then when meet agreed we got leading up to the day,"what are we gonna do " what are you gonna wear,one guy even TOLD Jackie what she should wear,needless to say he was binned | |||
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"I smiled when I read this, as can totally relate to it! I've put it down to a mating ritual lol Man's version of fluffing up his bright coloured feathers to charm and seduce you.... Unfortunately they fail to realise it's more of a turn off than a turn on!.....When will they learn just to be themselves...? " Exactly! It's like they think they have to behave a different way when they were doing just fine as they were. Oh well back to the drawing board lol. | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why???" Typical insecure behaviour I would say. I can imagine its a massive put off for many fems | |||
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"Oh I had this last week, bloody nightmare! But there loss I say " Less of the all encompassing tarring please! Lol ![]() | |||
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"Oh I had this last week, bloody nightmare! But there loss I say " I have noticed that many blokes seem to go into desperation mode once they think they have what they see as an imminent meet. Very unbecoming. | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why???" Wait, how does this constutute behaving like a total dick?? | |||
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"Why do SOME single men ![]() You have a very spankable bottom XXX | |||
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"As a guy on here it's difficult to get meets, as a married guy on here it's near impossible. However the behaviour of some guys is ridiculous, I am interested in some play with men so they can contact me. So far I've had things like "fancy a fuck" to "want to suck me dry" but my all time favourite was "do you want to shit on my face" I feel for women on here putting up with some of the guys which in turn makes it hard for the good ones. " Ive had that. Its not fun | |||
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"Why do SOME single men ![]() FFS! Why take it so personal? Of course not ALL single men do this. Maybe I should have re written it to say 'why do ALL single men who have messaged me in the last few days .....' And you wonder why newbies don't post!! | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why??? Wait, how does this constutute behaving like a total dick??" Because their behaviour changes. You have agreed to meet them and then they think they have to start relating everything to having sex with them. Seeing as you don't see this as 'dickish' behaviour maybe you can enlighten me as to why this would happen...... | |||
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"Why do SOME single men ![]() How did they message you? ![]() | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why??? Wait, how does this constutute behaving like a total dick?? Because their behaviour changes. You have agreed to meet them and then they think they have to start relating everything to having sex with them. Seeing as you don't see this as 'dickish' behaviour maybe you can enlighten me as to why this would happen......" Well surely context comes into it doesnt it? Are ye chatting about sex at the time? How often is he messaging? Is he being rude? Etc. | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why??? Wait, how does this constutute behaving like a total dick?? Because their behaviour changes. You have agreed to meet them and then they think they have to start relating everything to having sex with them. Seeing as you don't see this as 'dickish' behaviour maybe you can enlighten me as to why this would happen......" I have experienced this and find it very off putting too. I find it proprietary and presumptuous as I feel that it sounds like they think they are definitely going to have sex with you ...err..in Costa ...no thanks. Or worse they start to say let's just skip coffee because we are getting on so well and don't need to waste time having coffee babe ![]() | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why??? Wait, how does this constutute behaving like a total dick?? Because their behaviour changes. You have agreed to meet them and then they think they have to start relating everything to having sex with them. Seeing as you don't see this as 'dickish' behaviour maybe you can enlighten me as to why this would happen...... Well surely context comes into it doesnt it? Are ye chatting about sex at the time? How often is he messaging? Is he being rude? Etc." I can only describe it as changing from a normal conversation to arrange a meet. Friendly banter. Nothing sexual to flicking a switch and changing to sexual 'fancy a fuck' type mentality conversation. This is not just one fella. Three over a few days and similar with other friends off here. All now blocked as definitely won't be meeting. Back to just meeting single men in clubs. | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why??? Wait, how does this constutute behaving like a total dick?? Because their behaviour changes. You have agreed to meet them and then they think they have to start relating everything to having sex with them. Seeing as you don't see this as 'dickish' behaviour maybe you can enlighten me as to why this would happen...... I have experienced this and find it very off putting too. I find it proprietary and presumptuous as I feel that it sounds like they think they are definitely going to have sex with you ...err..in Costa ...no thanks. Or worse they start to say let's just skip coffee because we are getting on so well and don't need to waste time having coffee babe ![]() Now if it was Starbucks .....Just maybe lol | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why??? Wait, how does this constutute behaving like a total dick?? Because their behaviour changes. You have agreed to meet them and then they think they have to start relating everything to having sex with them. Seeing as you don't see this as 'dickish' behaviour maybe you can enlighten me as to why this would happen...... I have experienced this and find it very off putting too. I find it proprietary and presumptuous as I feel that it sounds like they think they are definitely going to have sex with you ...err..in Costa ...no thanks. Or worse they start to say let's just skip coffee because we are getting on so well and don't need to waste time having coffee babe ![]() I prefer Costa myself... ![]() | |||
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"I state from the beginning that he don't engage in sex talk. If there's any hint on the profile that the man may be the type to do this I don't talk to them. " I used to do this too. Maybe I've gone a little slack in my old age (insert own joke) lol. | |||
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"I state from the beginning that he don't engage in sex talk. If there's any hint on the profile that the man may be the type to do this I don't talk to them. I used to do this too. Maybe I've gone a little slack in my old age (insert own joke) lol." ![]() | |||
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"I state from the beginning that he don't engage in sex talk. If there's any hint on the profile that the man may be the type to do this I don't talk to them. I used to do this too. Maybe I've gone a little slack in my old age (insert own joke) lol." . It says on your profile" no single men" so how are they messaging you ? ![]() | |||
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"I state from the beginning that he don't engage in sex talk. If there's any hint on the profile that the man may be the type to do this I don't talk to them. I used to do this too. Maybe I've gone a little slack in my old age (insert own joke) lol.. It says on your profile" no single men" so how are they messaging you ? ![]() Sometimes we take the filters off. Believe it or not | |||
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"I state from the beginning that he don't engage in sex talk. If there's any hint on the profile that the man may be the type to do this I don't talk to them. I used to do this too. Maybe I've gone a little slack in my old age (insert own joke) lol.. It says on your profile" no single men" so how are they messaging you ? ![]() Did someone say filters? Suddenly I fancy a decent coffee. | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() We had similar recently, met a guy last year for social and didn't click. Have recently spoken again and decided we'll meet said gent in a club and see how things go. His response was "that's great, cos I HAVE been really patient with you for about a year so far" , that's kind of him, we thought... ![]() | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() Maybe he meant that he hasn't hassled you since the social meet and he is pleased you have arranged a meet with him It can be read both ways | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() I didn't even get a 'hi, it was good to meet you' or anything like that, just 'when are we playing' totally off putting ![]() | |||
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"I state from the beginning that he don't engage in sex talk. If there's any hint on the profile that the man may be the type to do this I don't talk to them. I used to do this too. Maybe I've gone a little slack in my old age (insert own joke) lol.. It says on your profile" no single men" so how are they messaging you ? ![]() Because I don't have filters on. So guess what - they can message me. If I wanted profile advice I will ask for it. If I don't I will state in my OP......oh wait!! ![]() | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() yeah perhaps, good point | |||
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"I state from the beginning that he don't engage in sex talk. If there's any hint on the profile that the man may be the type to do this I don't talk to them. I used to do this too. Maybe I've gone a little slack in my old age (insert own joke) lol.. It says on your profile" no single men" so how are they messaging you ? ![]() ![]() that is a filter | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() Nope... that was a definite dig. Obvious. | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() sorry but have to ask if you didn't click on a social why would you even think about arranging a second meeting in a club of all places to see how things go? ![]() | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() ![]() Because he was one of the very first people we met on here and after a period of re-assessment over our first year, the penny dropped that he was a nice guy and POSSIBLY would fit what we were looking for. which we initially thought he didn't. Hence agreeing to a second meet in a club (but , as everyone knows, sex in clubs is not guaranteed)to meet again and see if we would progress. Make sense? | |||
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"It's sad but some guys seriously don't know how to cumminicate on a normal level. Guys that act like that give us normal guys a bad name. We are not all like that, some of us are chilled no matter if there's a meet set up or not. Ps: some guys need lessons on how to relax be themselves and chat to woman " I don't agree with the 'guys that act like this/that/the other give us good guys a bad name/make it harder for us' etc The 'bad' guys make the 'good' guys stand out all the more ![]() | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() ![]() Yep makes perfect sense when you put it like that although I would of opted for a second social rather than a club meet myself | |||
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"It's sad but some guys seriously don't know how to cumminicate on a normal level. Guys that act like that give us normal guys a bad name. We are not all like that, some of us are chilled no matter if there's a meet set up or not. Ps: some guys need lessons on how to relax be themselves and chat to woman I don't agree with the 'guys that act like this/that/the other give us good guys a bad name/make it harder for us' etc The 'bad' guys make the 'good' guys stand out all the more ![]() Thank you ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() ![]() Horses for courses, we've changed a lot since joining the site and as a known quantity, a second meet in the bar area of a club enables progressing to play OR a polite no depending how it goes. But at least it made sense this time ![]() | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() ![]() Being a cheeky American with no filter , I'm starting to see a trend in the forums... People post negative things about single males and then say " THAT'S WHY WE ONLY MEET IN CLUBS " This must be new age marketing for clubs ![]() | |||
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"I thought that us single men were getting a raw deal until i read my own messages. "Car fun" nothing else whats that about reply "yes it is I love driving it". "Want to meet up and chat sometime" reply "Thats fine I want to meet new people" Next message "i'll do you up the a***". I totally sympathise with the girls and couples on here. " Sorry, I was feeling horny when I sent you those messages. I won't do it again ![]() | |||
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" But why???" Yep we've had this. Anything to do with the fact that they may have more interaction with porn films than 'real' people perhaps? Just a thought. | |||
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"WOW! I had no idea this actually went on? I can expect that sort of behaviour from teenagers but not grown men. Well we are all different after all. I've not massively experienced the first stages yet of message conversation let alone stage 2 and a meet. Having said that, I wouldn't resort to the immature behaviour of messaging such nonsense anyway. It's definitely a turn off, without a doubt " You can borrow my mail box any day and you can see for yourself ![]() ![]() | |||
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"I had a social once, and then the very next message I received was 'so when are we playing?' Now that presumptuous behaviour pissed me off ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() lol ok fair enough if it works for you than cool but i just think alot of guys who are invited to a second meeting in a club(after a social) would be thinking something is likely to happen or you wouldn't of invited for a second meeting at that venue but hey what do i know ![]() | |||
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"I thought that us single men were getting a raw deal until i read my own messages. "Car fun" nothing else whats that about reply "yes it is I love driving it". "Want to meet up and chat sometime" reply "Thats fine I want to meet new people" Next message "i'll do you up the a***". I totally sympathise with the girls and couples on here. Sorry, I was feeling horny when I sent you those messages. I won't do it again ![]() You crack me up at times ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Oh I had this last week, bloody nightmare! But there loss I say I have noticed that many blokes seem to go into desperation mode once they think they have what they see as an imminent meet. Very unbecoming. " This is so true lol | |||
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"I thought that us single men were getting a raw deal until i read my own messages. "Car fun" nothing else whats that about reply "yes it is I love driving it". "Want to meet up and chat sometime" reply "Thats fine I want to meet new people" Next message "i'll do you up the a***". I totally sympathise with the girls and couples on here. Sorry, I was feeling horny when I sent you those messages. I won't do it again ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why???" Quite possibly this guy was a total dick all along, just managed to be on his best behaviour for a while....Once he thought he had an in, he just let the facade slip. I suppose you could always dictate terms and conditions (some people do need to be told exactly what to do) 'ok...We've arranged to meet..now don't /do act like an over excited puppy' that should just about do the trick. ![]() | |||
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"It makes it damn hard for us decent single guys to meet people, especially if your older, even just socially. Take heart tho there are still some gentlemen around." No it doesn't.it makes it easier. | |||
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"I thought that us single men were getting a raw deal until i read my own messages. "Car fun" nothing else whats that about reply "yes it is I love driving it". "Want to meet up and chat sometime" reply "Thats fine I want to meet new people" Next message "i'll do you up the a***". I totally sympathise with the girls and couples on here. Sorry, I was feeling horny when I sent you those messages. I won't do it again ![]() Scrolling down and read this...just knew it was you ![]() ![]() | |||
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"It makes it damn hard for us decent single guys to meet people, especially if your older, even just socially. Take heart tho there are still some gentlemen around." Do you honestly believe that the behaviour of others has a direct impact on the amount of meets you don't manage to arrange? | |||
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"I thought that us single men were getting a raw deal until i read my own messages. "Car fun" nothing else whats that about reply "yes it is I love driving it". "Want to meet up and chat sometime" reply "Thats fine I want to meet new people" Next message "i'll do you up the a***". I totally sympathise with the girls and couples on here. Sorry, I was feeling horny when I sent you those messages. I won't do it again ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Maybe there not that into you and looking for a way out ![]() So why not just say that then ![]() | |||
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"It makes it damn hard for us decent single guys to meet people, especially if your older, even just socially. Take heart tho there are still some gentlemen around." No it doesn't. If I want a meet I'll arrange a meet, if you're that guy then I'll be very straightforward about what I expect. I don't need a gentleman and I certainly don't want a guy who keeps telling me he's a gentleman. I simply want a guy who will make an arrangement and stick to it then we take it from the actual meet. | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why???" I appreciate what you are saying and I understand what sort of pestering you get, but it sounds like you are tarnishing all single men with the same brush. I'm sure not all are like this. | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why??? I appreciate what you are saying and I understand what sort of pestering you get, but it sounds like you are tarnishing all single men with the same brush. I'm sure not all are like this. " If that I'd how you have chosen to misinterpreted my post then there is nothing I can do about that. At no point do I say ALL men, however some chose to jump on that issue. I have met many lovely men over the years. Of course I know not all are dicks. What I am asking is why do men who chose to do this, do it? Why spoil the chance of a meet by acting like this. If you fit into this catagory then please speak out and throw some light on the subject. | |||
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"It is called respect. I pride myself on treating any lady or couple with total respect,from first message to meet and beyond. This is not a meat market nor is it a shagfest, it is like minded people indulging in adult fun. To me respect is everything. " This ![]() | |||
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"This is why I no longer exchange phone numbers. If you need to contact me you can do it through the site (I can get onto the site anywhere and anywhen) and I have enough verifications to say I'm genuine and if I say I'll be there I'll be there. The final straw was the guy I arranged to meet a couple of days ahead who kept messaging me to chat. I replied politely but explained that I was away with work and was (surprise surprise) working so couldn't really chat. Anyway, my phone kept going off whilst I was busy so I put it in another room so it didn't disturb anyone. When I got back to it an hour and a half later there was a succession of messages that started chatty, then got "why are you ignoring me" and went all the way to "you think this is funny?! Why won't you answer? Are you messing with me?" and then called me all kinds of names for leading him on! ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why??? I appreciate what you are saying and I understand what sort of pestering you get, but it sounds like you are tarnishing all single men with the same brush. I'm sure not all are like this. " We're not tarnishing all men, we simply have to adjust our approach to avoid the numpties and the pestering. When meeting strangers off the internet it's sensible to have ground rules. It's not unreasonable to state those ground rules and hopefully the other party will understand why they exist and respect that. The other party is always free to pass if they want to play by different rules. If we thought all single men are the same we wouldn't still be here. | |||
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"Maybe a couple more boxes should be added to tick off first...that might help...or change a few boxes..... just myinitial thought as I read the OP." PMSL I'm hardly a newbie. If I add anymore boxes to tick I may as well get them to complete a 60 page questionnaire. | |||
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"This is why I no longer exchange phone numbers. If you need to contact me you can do it through the site (I can get onto the site anywhere and anywhen) and I have enough verifications to say I'm genuine and if I say I'll be there I'll be there. The final straw was the guy I arranged to meet a couple of days ahead who kept messaging me to chat. I replied politely but explained that I was away with work and was (surprise surprise) working so couldn't really chat. Anyway, my phone kept going off whilst I was busy so I put it in another room so it didn't disturb anyone. When I got back to it an hour and a half later there was a succession of messages that started chatty, then got "why are you ignoring me" and went all the way to "you think this is funny?! Why won't you answer? Are you messing with me?" and then called me all kinds of names for leading him on! ![]() ![]() ![]() Forgive my ignorance, but what is 'mithering'? | |||
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"This is why I no longer exchange phone numbers. If you need to contact me you can do it through the site (I can get onto the site anywhere and anywhen) and I have enough verifications to say I'm genuine and if I say I'll be there I'll be there. The final straw was the guy I arranged to meet a couple of days ahead who kept messaging me to chat. I replied politely but explained that I was away with work and was (surprise surprise) working so couldn't really chat. Anyway, my phone kept going off whilst I was busy so I put it in another room so it didn't disturb anyone. When I got back to it an hour and a half later there was a succession of messages that started chatty, then got "why are you ignoring me" and went all the way to "you think this is funny?! Why won't you answer? Are you messing with me?" and then called me all kinds of names for leading him on! ![]() ![]() ![]() Worrying | |||
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"This is why I no longer exchange phone numbers. If you need to contact me you can do it through the site (I can get onto the site anywhere and anywhen) and I have enough verifications to say I'm genuine and if I say I'll be there I'll be there. The final straw was the guy I arranged to meet a couple of days ahead who kept messaging me to chat. I replied politely but explained that I was away with work and was (surprise surprise) working so couldn't really chat. Anyway, my phone kept going off whilst I was busy so I put it in another room so it didn't disturb anyone. When I got back to it an hour and a half later there was a succession of messages that started chatty, then got "why are you ignoring me" and went all the way to "you think this is funny?! Why won't you answer? Are you messing with me?" and then called me all kinds of names for leading him on! ![]() ![]() ![]() Wittling on,hassling | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why???" Do you tell them you don't want any dirty talk or do you just block them when they start with the sex talk? | |||
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"Maybe a couple more boxes should be added to tick off first...that might help...or change a few boxes..... just myinitial thought as I read the OP. PMSL I'm hardly a newbie. If I add anymore boxes to tick I may as well get them to complete a 60 page questionnaire. " Well I can join in with the sarcasm if you like but I avoided it in my first comment....but seems like you have a problem or you wouldn't have posted. So going back to what I suggested...maybe you've got the wrong boxes.....or simpler put so you dont misunderstand maybe you're attracting the wrong type. It's not as if there aren't a lot of genuine guys or maybe you've gone through the current deck and need to wait for a new shuffle. ... ![]() | |||
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"This is why I no longer exchange phone numbers. If you need to contact me you can do it through the site (I can get onto the site anywhere and anywhen) and I have enough verifications to say I'm genuine and if I say I'll be there I'll be there. The final straw was the guy I arranged to meet a couple of days ahead who kept messaging me to chat. I replied politely but explained that I was away with work and was (surprise surprise) working so couldn't really chat. Anyway, my phone kept going off whilst I was busy so I put it in another room so it didn't disturb anyone. When I got back to it an hour and a half later there was a succession of messages that started chatty, then got "why are you ignoring me" and went all the way to "you think this is funny?! Why won't you answer? Are you messing with me?" and then called me all kinds of names for leading him on! ![]() ![]() ![]() Sorry it's a northern thing ![]() | |||
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"Maybe a couple more boxes should be added to tick off first...that might help...or change a few boxes..... just myinitial thought as I read the OP. PMSL I'm hardly a newbie. If I add anymore boxes to tick I may as well get them to complete a 60 page questionnaire. Well I can join in with the sarcasm if you like but I avoided it in my first comment....but seems like you have a problem or you wouldn't have posted. So going back to what I suggested...maybe you've got the wrong boxes.....or simpler put so you dont misunderstand maybe you're attracting the wrong type. It's not as if there aren't a lot of genuine guys or maybe you've gone through the current deck and need to wait for a new shuffle. ... ![]() And as I put in my OP I don't need profile advice. Friends on here have gone through the same, as have ladies and couples who have posted on here. What my OP is asking is why do SOME (don't want to upset people) men do this. No need to go off track of the OP thanks. | |||
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"One bloke asked what I was going to do to worship his huge cock..... I made a song up to sing to it... Oh Cock Supreme Oh Cock Supreme, I long to see you cream, Oh cock delight, Can't wait to suck you tonight, Oh cock Devine, How I wish you were mine, Oh cock Supreme. Sadly I never got the chance to sing to it, as I put off meeting him, probably just as well as his huge cock would have withered if I started singing, I sound worse than a squalling cat.XXX lol" Never had anyone sing to my cock before lol. Was one lass that started singing when she came which was a new experience... | |||
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"Maybe a couple more boxes should be added to tick off first...that might help...or change a few boxes..... just myinitial thought as I read the OP. PMSL I'm hardly a newbie. If I add anymore boxes to tick I may as well get them to complete a 60 page questionnaire. Well I can join in with the sarcasm if you like but I avoided it in my first comment....but seems like you have a problem or you wouldn't have posted. So going back to what I suggested...maybe you've got the wrong boxes.....or simpler put so you dont misunderstand maybe you're attracting the wrong type. It's not as if there aren't a lot of genuine guys or maybe you've gone through the current deck and need to wait for a new shuffle. ... ![]() To answer your question-who knows why. You would have to ask each man individually to get your answer. | |||
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"because that first approach, well they've taken the advice they've been given on here on how to get women to talk to them. once they feel comfortable with you and reckon you're a sure thing then they also feel comfortable showing their true intentions. it's why i stopped advising crap men on how to interact on this site with women because they're wasting our time by being fake." ![]() | |||
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"If it's any consolation I'm finding single women bad at the moment! Recently I thought I was quite selective... One we chatted for ages exchanged kik, planned a meet then she disappeared, the other arranged a hotel meet but as she didn't confirm it or contact me after I am glad I didn't book the room! Sadly I guess it's just the nature of the site and frustrating..." ![]() | |||
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"because that first approach, well they've taken the advice they've been given on here on how to get women to talk to them. once they feel comfortable with you and reckon you're a sure thing then they also feel comfortable showing their true intentions. it's why i stopped advising crap men on how to interact on this site with women because they're wasting our time by being fake." Well at least that's one person who has stopped teaching certain men how not to be themselves. | |||
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"because that first approach, well they've taken the advice they've been given on here on how to get women to talk to them. once they feel comfortable with you and reckon you're a sure thing then they also feel comfortable showing their true intentions. it's why i stopped advising crap men on how to interact on this site with women because they're wasting our time by being fake. Well at least that's one person who has stopped teaching certain men how not to be themselves." LOL ![]() | |||
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"As a single male, I would be happy to arrange the place and date, then not make any contact until the day before, to confirm. But some people want me to make comments about what we will do, when we meet (oddly the ones who cancel or fade away) I'm in favour of communication, but don't want to dictate a script. " ![]() | |||
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"On the other hand I sent a polite message to a verified couple yesterday, got a message back asking when I could meet, to which I replied. Was then deleted, and no more contact. Ah well, keep on keeping on. " We've had similar experiences. They are quite mind-boggling. | |||
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"why do single men even exist? lets just kill them all ![]() Nooooo - I have uses for them: my bath needs running, ironing to do lol ![]() | |||
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"why do single men even exist? lets just kill them all ![]() ![]() Oh great, do mine when you're at it, there's a good lass ![]() | |||
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"why do single men even exist? lets just kill them all ![]() ![]() ![]() Let's make these fookers work lol. Anyone else got ironing? I need a button sewing on too ![]() | |||
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"Typical insecure behaviour I would say. I can imagine its a massive put off for many fems" Oooh, Interesting! I love hearing the man's point of _iew. And yes, guys do this to me and get binned immediately. It's only those who don't that I end up meeting. And as I am normally a club meety kinda girl, those who don't behave like twats Im keen to meet again (which can give the wrong impression when not meaning to, too!) Ive recently had a conversation with a married fabber and whilst I don't normally go there, am starting to think that it's actually easier. It is easier. Far less stressful.... Love this learning journey! | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why???" well if you haven't worked it out by now, here is the reason... a lot of (but not all) single men on here think that getting the green light for a social meet equates to being given the sole opportunity to impress whoever they are meeting in whatever way possible.... so that means not becoming mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' but reverting back to that persona once the mr 'ticking most of the boxes' persona has served its purpose! it was always there, but it was just lurking under the surface ready to pounce once given the green light to do so ![]() | |||
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"Ok. We have all read the threads about how hard it is for single men to get meets on here. So why do they balls it up when they have the chance of a meet?? Three times in the last few days, similar scenario: get message from a single fella, he meets the criteria, few decent messages back and forth,face pics swapped, agree to a coffee meet to see if there is 'a connection' ......date/venue agreed ....then it starts....the constant 'how are u babe? What you doing? What u wearing? You having fun? 'You're making me hard.... Why??? Instant turn off. Why go from 'Mr ticking most of the boxes/let's see how this goes' to Mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' just cos a meet has been set? I am NOT after profile advice. Speaking to fem friends this seems to happen a fair bit so I know it's not just me. But why??? well if you haven't worked it out by now, here is the reason... a lot of (but not all) single men on here think that getting the green light for a social meet equates to being given the sole opportunity to impress whoever they are meeting in whatever way possible.... so that means not becoming mr 'I'm going to behave like a total dick' but reverting back to that persona once the mr 'ticking most of the boxes' persona has served its purpose! it was always there, but it was just lurking under the surface ready to pounce once given the green light to do so ![]() I think this hits the nail on the head buuuut I may just get them to agree to do my ironing before I arrange a meet in future. ![]() | |||
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"Typical insecure behaviour I would say. I can imagine its a massive put off for many fems Oooh, Interesting! I love hearing the man's point of _iew. And yes, guys do this to me and get binned immediately. It's only those who don't that I end up meeting. And as I am normally a club meety kinda girl, those who don't behave like twats Im keen to meet again (which can give the wrong impression when not meaning to, too!) Ive recently had a conversation with a married fabber and whilst I don't normally go there, am starting to think that it's actually easier. It is easier. Far less stressful.... Love this learning journey!" Married doesn't necessarily mean easier. It can mean "I can only meet between 11 and 2, I know you want to meet in a public place for your safety but I insist on coming to your house and if you won't hand out your address I'll suggest you're lying and are hiding your behaviour, don't wear perfume or strong makeup, I can't shower as I don't want to smell of different shower gel, I want your number but you can't call or text me I'll contact you"... And it goes on. I've heard all of those often from one person. It didn't take me long to decide married/attached men are not for me. | |||
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