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fb/fwd advice needed

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By *reespiritedwoman OP   Woman
over a year ago

Leicester

My bestfriend and I have been fWbs for 5 YEARS!

We met online for that specific reason. The sex is amazing and I thought all was as normal then suddenly he wants to be just friends..? I am very fond of him and he says he is of me, but ....why? Is he testing me? I've seen him a few times since this announcement but it doesn't feel the same. We used to talk for hours after sex about anything and everything but now he won't stay over. I miss it! Should I try and seduce him? He likes strong women....I really DO NOT want to lose his friendship, but am confused. He swears he isn't seeing anyone any I believe him...HELP!

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

He could be worried you're becoming too attached to him and wanting more than FWB

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

maybe he's got a girlfriend and not told you about her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You mean sex is now off the menu?

Talk to him about it. And then you need to decide if you can cope with just friendship or if it's the end of the line. Only you can decide that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My bestfriend and I have been fWbs for 5 YEARS!

We met online for that specific reason. The sex is amazing and I thought all was as normal then suddenly he wants to be just friends..? I am very fond of him and he says he is of me, but ....why? Is he testing me? I've seen him a few times since this announcement but it doesn't feel the same. We used to talk for hours after sex about anything and everything but now he won't stay over. I miss it! Should I try and seduce him? He likes strong women....I really DO NOT want to lose his friendship, but am confused. He swears he isn't seeing anyone any I believe him...HELP!"

An fwb is just that. It does sound like you are too needy for him, take the hint if you still want him as a friend. I had the same problem with a fwb lady who wanted me to jump though hoops for her.

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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago

Retirement Village

Tricky one. Have you started wanting more than being fwb's ?

Its not easy when you have a strong connection

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My bestfriend and I have been fWbs for 5 YEARS!

We met online for that specific reason. The sex is amazing and I thought all was as normal then suddenly he wants to be just friends..? I am very fond of him and he says he is of me, but ....why? Is he testing me? I've seen him a few times since this announcement but it doesn't feel the same. We used to talk for hours after sex about anything and everything but now he won't stay over. I miss it! Should I try and seduce him? He likes strong women....I really DO NOT want to lose his friendship, but am confused. He swears he isn't seeing anyone any I believe him...HELP!"

Are you still having sex with him? If you are why? Are you happy with the arrangemen? You need to think about what you want out of the situation. If he is a true friend (and sadly in situations like this it is unlikely) then he will be able to explain why he wants the situation to change and you would be able to move on. Rarely we wake up thinking ...this has got to change without a reason and if he's not telling you what that reason is then you can't move on.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

As with all these type of posts you need to talk to him. How can any of us possibly know what he's thinking?

If you've tried to talk to him and he's refused to engage its because he thinks you won't like what he has to say. However one thing is clear he no longer wants your relationship to be sexual, the choice you now have is to continue on those terms or not.

Good luck.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Also when you ask if he's testing you what do you mean? You're there, available, good company, willing to have sex...what test is he applying?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The flip side arguement to this could be that HE wants to take it further with you but doesn't see that you want that so rather than hanging around and being a sex toy for the rest of his life he's gone to try and find someone who wants to be in a relationship.

Pure speculation of course, only he can give you a definite answer.

Go speak to him not us OP.

X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You speak of him like he's more than just a fwb, and there lies your problem. Sounds like you want more out of it which could be pushing him away. The beauty about fwb sex is that there is no pressure to commit or devote yourself to others. 5 years is a long time to be shagging the same person though and I see how you would develop feelings for him. He must have his reasons for sticking around this long too? You two need to have an honest chat, good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The flip side arguement to this could be that HE wants to take it further with you but doesn't see that you want that so rather than hanging around and being a sex toy for the rest of his life he's gone to try and find someone who wants to be in a relationship.

Pure speculation of course, only he can give you a definite answer.

Go speak to him not us OP.

X"
exactly what we were thinking

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

My fb did that to me years ago and swore he wasn't seeing anyone - he was.

We started seeing each other many times over and he 'cheated' every time - his lies were too believable and he logically just didn't have time to fit the others in!!

He wanted us to be monogamous in the end and have a full on 'me n him' relationship - I later found out he was swinging with someone else and had been for fifteen momths- so assume he didn't want us to so I didn't find out! Put my health at risk too which was unforgivable.

Mine was just a twat I let walk over me for ten years cause I loved the scumbag and he was so 'nice'.

I'm not saying yours is like that, I'm saying sit n talk to him and don't let yourself be used unless that's what YOU want x

Good luck in resolving this a way you are happy x

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

The only way to find out and put your mind at rest is to ask him, only he can answer your questions......but if it was me I would rather know one way or the other than put myself through a lot of ...what ifs.......People just need to be honest, and who ever knows all might work out

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Sounds like hes maybe met someone else?like others have said ask hin outright and at least you will then know.Miss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My bestfriend and I have been fWbs for 5 YEARS!

We met online for that specific reason. The sex is amazing and I thought all was as normal then suddenly he wants to be just friends..? I am very fond of him and he says he is of me, but ....why? Is he testing me? I've seen him a few times since this announcement but it doesn't feel the same. We used to talk for hours after sex about anything and everything but now he won't stay over. I miss it! Should I try and seduce him? He likes strong women....I really DO NOT want to lose his friendship, but am confused. He swears he isn't seeing anyone any I believe him...HELP!"
maybe he feels its not exciting anymore and too much like a relationship and wants to find someone new for new experiences. all fwb come to an end eventually for all sorts of reasons. if he says lets just be friends sounds like he doesn't fancy you anymore. harsh but youll live move on and find your nsa fun elsewhere.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Better to regret something that you did, instead to regret something that you didn't.

Thus have a full open talk with him and sort it out

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Over the years ive had numerous single guy friends and in most cases they ended because they found a girlfriend. Alwaya stayed in touch but less and less. You know single guys will eventually find someone.

But he may not of got a girlfriend

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