FabSwingers.com forum: Advice needed

By *unfriends1976 OP Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

I am the male half of a friend's with benefits couple, we started chatting to a couple a while ago with the possibility of meeting. Then last weekend the chatting stopped. I found out on Thursday this week that my friend and the couple have been chatting somewhere else and are now planning a threesome.

My friend is free to meet on her own, should I feel annoyed they totally excluded me or am I being petty?

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By *histler21Man
over a year ago

Ipswich

"I am the male half of a friend's with benefits couple, we started chatting to a couple a while ago with the possibility of meeting. Then last weekend the chatting stopped. I found out on Thursday this week that my friend and the couple have been chatting somewhere else and are now planning a threesome.

My friend is free to meet on her own, should I feel annoyed they totally excluded me or am I being petty?"

Wouldnt say you were being petty - but she is free to do as she wishes .

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By *iscean MaleMan
over a year ago

Darlaston

Yes you feel a bit peed off and used.. but ultimately she is not answerable to you and free to do as she pleases.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you told her how you feel, she might not realise it's upset you.

But at the end of the day, you are both free agents and obviously meet for sex now and then.

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By *uffolkJPMan
over a year ago

Suffolk

You're right to feel peeved. Perhaps explain how you feel, might help her understand. However, she is free to do what she likes ultimately.

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By *ubbykittenWoman
over a year ago

Kent

In my humble opinion, it is more about etiquette and respect. She is entitled to do as she pleases and so are you...but if the two of you had an 'arrangement' and she suddenly ceases contact then she could surely just say?

I just think that's good manners. Nothing more.

Aren't fuck buddies also supposed to be friends and be courteous to eachother?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was in a similar situation recently. A male friend and I were arranging to meet a couple. We couldn't coordinate timings for all 4 of us but the couple suggested meeting just me. I chatted with my friend before I accepted. He was fine about it, but I simply thought it was good manners to discuss it.

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

I would discuss it first

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By *unfriends1976 OP Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

After a lot of probing and questions she finally admitted they were chatting then more questions she came clean about the threesome. I don't mind her meeting them for the threesome, I'm just not happy about not being kept in the loop

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"After a lot of probing and questions she finally admitted they were chatting then more questions she came clean about the threesome. I don't mind her meeting them for the threesome, I'm just not happy about not being kept in the loop"

Now being honest if the shoe was on the other foot would you keep her in the loop food for thought .

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I suppose it depends on your relationship but why did you feel that you needed to do a lot of probing and questioning? Are you both interpreting the conditions of your relationship in the same way?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/04/16 18:03:57]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you sure it's just Fuck buddies between you and her?

You might not realise it but actually have feelings for her and the green eyed monster has just been a little rattled...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if she is only a fuck buddy then I would guess it has nothing to do with you as there no relationship ? just sex she is free to do as please as are you ?? ..well that's my take on it maybe im wrong .. and another good reason to why we don't meet fuck buddys

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By *unfriends1976 OP Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

I have chosen not to meet other people because in her words 'I might leave her for a better model'

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By *hil and AnnieMan
over a year ago

Stafford

Now being honest if the shoe was on the other foot would you keep her in the loop food for thought .

I would. It's a question of manners and there seems to have been a lack of manners here. Communication is everything in the fab world.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I have chosen not to meet other people because in her words 'I might leave her for a better model'"

I see a slight imbalance here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah bang out of order...

The couple knew they were messaging two people and couldn't be bothered to just be honest about not wanting you.Your FB should have discussed with you.

What's the point in lying? Your not a couple and she's not cheating on you?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

It's natural to feel peeved but there again....it doesn't really matter, does it? You'll see her again, there will be more opportunities....don't worry about it - the emotional intelligence to deal with situations like this is all part of swinging.

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By *unfriends1976 OP Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

Had a chat with Mrs last night and she sees my point of view, don't know what's happening with the couple they haven't been in touch

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Had a chat with Mrs last night and she sees my point of view, don't know what's happening with the couple they haven't been in touch"

I'm very confused

. When you say Mrs what do you mean?

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By *unfriends1976 OP Couple
over a year ago

Darlington

"Had a chat with Mrs last night and she sees my point of view, don't know what's happening with the couple they haven't been in touch

I'm very confused

. When you say Mrs what do you mean?"

It's what she has called herself on our profile, sorry for the confusion

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Had a chat with Mrs last night and she sees my point of view, don't know what's happening with the couple they haven't been in touch

I'm very confused

. When you say Mrs what do you mean?

It's what she has called herself on our profile, sorry for the confusion"

Oh right

sorry I didn't look at your profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think if you identify as a couple then you should be treated as such. Especially when the contact was made as a couple. You may only be fbs but you are on here as a couple and treated as such. Your partner should have told you from the beginning.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think you just have to chalk it down to experience and move on.

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