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"Tell them, you never know they might be into it too and want a swingers relationship which you both can enjoy" But how early on should I tell them? Do I risk telling them immediately and them treating me like a girl they just wanna fuck instead of someone they could see a future with, or do I hold out until I really like them and risk losing them? | |||
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"I have this trouble too. I like swinging and attending clubs etc, and ideally want someone I can do this with. But I meet girls in "real life" (for want of a better word) and start getting to know them, and worry that if I tell them about it it will freak them out completely! " Yeah it's weird for me because I'm so open sexually, and I'm not usually phased by anything. But if I like a guy and in the early stages of dating he's very forward with sex it just puts off! I'm such a hypocrite | |||
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"It's a hard one, I'm a swinger but my hubby isn't both met some great people who we get along with , holidays meals drinks nights out, but to tell someone your a swinger when you are just forming a relationship fuck I've no idea, honesty is the best policy ??? " Exactly! I'd hate to keep a secret like this from someone, but thinking back even a few months if someone had told me they were a swinger (I didn't know anything about the scene back then) I wouldn't have known what to make of it and probably have just thought they were easy or a player! Obviously I know different now. | |||
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"You should tell them, but you don't need to tell them on a first date. If it looks like it's turning into something a little more serious, then tell them. If you tell them on a first date, that might be the end of it, not because you are a swinger, but because you have poor judgement by sharing something so intimate on a first date. " I understand what you're saying,but when exactly would you have that chat,a month down the line,6 months etc I often think about this and would rather be upfront from the beginning,if you don't it's like you're hiding something and ashamed. I'd rather someone dump me from the off instead of 6 months down the linw when I've fallen for them. | |||
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"I have a friend, female, who used to swing. When she met a new guy we had this very conversation. She stopped swinging and deleted her profile. As the relationship developed into something serious I advised her to tell him about her past, which she did. He accepted it as her past but didn't want to swing. Her ex swing partner opened an account using pics of her from her swinging days and pics from her Facebook. He then included the names of her and her fiancé and his mobile number. I think it best to be honest with new partners as these things have a habit of popping up on you. The other side of this is you; by the sounds of it you wouldn't be happy without a person of a similar drive and openness. Perhaps another swinger would suit your needs? Xx" I just don't think I'm very good at dating Rachael! The last person I dated was horrified when he found my vibrator and when I told him how much I used it he really hates it! It seems that when you date a guy they prefer you to be all inexperienced and virginal, which I'm just not hahaha | |||
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"I have a friend, female, who used to swing. When she met a new guy we had this very conversation. She stopped swinging and deleted her profile. As the relationship developed into something serious I advised her to tell him about her past, which she did. He accepted it as her past but didn't want to swing. Her ex swing partner opened an account using pics of her from her swinging days and pics from her Facebook. He then included the names of her and her fiancé and his mobile number. I think it best to be honest with new partners as these things have a habit of popping up on you. The other side of this is you; by the sounds of it you wouldn't be happy without a person of a similar drive and openness. Perhaps another swinger would suit your needs? Xx I just don't think I'm very good at dating Rachael! The last person I dated was horrified when he found my vibrator and when I told him how much I used it he really hates it! It seems that when you date a guy they prefer you to be all inexperienced and virginal, which I'm just not hahaha " No, you're picking guys with immature egos. | |||
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"I'm in the same boat.... I'm leaning towards not telling them, and if the sex life dies down a little in the coming years I'll bring it up then. I'd rather have love than fun sex." If your going down the route of swinging in its traditional form the benefit is you can have both love and casual fun sex | |||
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"You should tell them, but you don't need to tell them on a first date. If it looks like it's turning into something a little more serious, then tell them. If you tell them on a first date, that might be the end of it, not because you are a swinger, but because you have poor judgement by sharing something so intimate on a first date. I understand what you're saying,but when exactly would you have that chat,a month down the line,6 months etc I often think about this and would rather be upfront from the beginning,if you don't it's like you're hiding something and ashamed. I'd rather someone dump me from the off instead of 6 months down the linw when I've fallen for them." I totally agree with both of you, it's definitely not first date material but I do wear my heart on my sleeve and I usually know straight away if I like someone enough to be with them, and therefore how do I balance when to tell them, risk losing someone I like but not keep secrets (Probably why I've been single for about a year). | |||
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"I have this trouble too. I like swinging and attending clubs etc, and ideally want someone I can do this with. But I meet girls in "real life" (for want of a better word) and start getting to know them, and worry that if I tell them about it it will freak them out completely! " Hahahah I call it the 'outside world' | |||
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"You should tell them, but you don't need to tell them on a first date. If it looks like it's turning into something a little more serious, then tell them. If you tell them on a first date, that might be the end of it, not because you are a swinger, but because you have poor judgement by sharing something so intimate on a first date. I understand what you're saying,but when exactly would you have that chat,a month down the line,6 months etc I often think about this and would rather be upfront from the beginning,if you don't it's like you're hiding something and ashamed. I'd rather someone dump me from the off instead of 6 months down the linw when I've fallen for them. I totally agree with both of you, it's definitely not first date material but I do wear my heart on my sleeve and I usually know straight away if I like someone enough to be with them, and therefore how do I balance when to tell them, risk losing someone I like but not keep secrets (Probably why I've been single for about a year). " but then if someone does disapprove are they really the one for you! | |||
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"I'm in the same boat.... I'm leaning towards not telling them, and if the sex life dies down a little in the coming years I'll bring it up then. I'd rather have love than fun sex. If your going down the route of swinging in its traditional form the benefit is you can have both love and casual fun sex " Only if I got really lucky I fear | |||
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"I have a friend, female, who used to swing. When she met a new guy we had this very conversation. She stopped swinging and deleted her profile. As the relationship developed into something serious I advised her to tell him about her past, which she did. He accepted it as her past but didn't want to swing. Her ex swing partner opened an account using pics of her from her swinging days and pics from her Facebook. He then included the names of her and her fiancé and his mobile number. I think it best to be honest with new partners as these things have a habit of popping up on you. The other side of this is you; by the sounds of it you wouldn't be happy without a person of a similar drive and openness. Perhaps another swinger would suit your needs? Xx I just don't think I'm very good at dating Rachael! The last person I dated was horrified when he found my vibrator and when I told him how much I used it he really hates it! It seems that when you date a guy they prefer you to be all inexperienced and virginal, which I'm just not hahaha " This was why I suggested you might be suited to someone from the scene. xx | |||
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"Long story short, I (mr) was in to this before we got together, told A all about clubs and Swinging, we're now having the best sex of our lives and fulfilling every fantasy we have xx" Aw that's so nice to hear! Also good lad for being a red! | |||
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"Long story short, I (mr) was in to this before we got together, told A all about clubs and Swinging, we're now having the best sex of our lives and fulfilling every fantasy we have xx Aw that's so nice to hear! Also good lad for being a red! " Lol thanks YNWA | |||
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"Long story short, I (mr) was in to this before we got together, told A all about clubs and Swinging, we're now having the best sex of our lives and fulfilling every fantasy we have xx" That's excellent! | |||
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"Long story short, I (mr) was in to this before we got together, told A all about clubs and Swinging, we're now having the best sex of our lives and fulfilling every fantasy we have xx That's excellent!" Thanks, we're loving it at the moment, love showing A off in clubs, love seeing her being naughty with other girls & guys, love being naughty with her, as she is watching, it's simply incredible, I'm a very lucky boy x | |||
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"Long story short, I (mr) was in to this before we got together, told A all about clubs and Swinging, we're now having the best sex of our lives and fulfilling every fantasy we have xx That's excellent! Thanks, we're loving it at the moment, love showing A off in clubs, love seeing her being naughty with other girls & guys, love being naughty with her, as she is watching, it's simply incredible, I'm a very lucky boy x" Hahaha alright lad don't rub it in! | |||
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"Long story short, I (mr) was in to this before we got together, told A all about clubs and Swinging, we're now having the best sex of our lives and fulfilling every fantasy we have xx That's excellent! Thanks, we're loving it at the moment, love showing A off in clubs, love seeing her being naughty with other girls & guys, love being naughty with her, as she is watching, it's simply incredible, I'm a very lucky boy x Hahaha alright lad don't rub it in!" Ha ha come and join us sometime, we would both like to rub something in | |||
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"Do your friends/ family etc know that you are a swinger? Would you be happy with them knowing? The risk with telling a new partner early on is that he might be horrified and tell the whole world. Some people think that swinging is a terrible thing." She's right. It's awful. I hate it | |||
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"I have this trouble too. I like swinging and attending clubs etc, and ideally want someone I can do this with. But I meet girls in "real life" (for want of a better word) and start getting to know them, and worry that if I tell them about it it will freak them out completely! Hahahah I call it the 'outside world'" I just think you've been dating some fairly sexually unadventurous men, and with that sort of man the swinging side is never going to work If you're going out with an open minded man who isn't freaked out by you enjoying your body etc then having swinging as part of your relationship wouldn't be an issue | |||
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"Hey everyone! So I can't imagine I'm the first to post a thread regarding this topic and I apologise if it's already been done to death. Basically I'm very new to the swinging scene and I've met some lovely people, but I've been single for over 2 years and wouldn't mind meeting someone special! So my question is, if I meet someone I really like do I tell them that I'm a swinger? I would quit the scene for the right person, but I would worry that if I told them they would be put off (someone I dated in the past was put off when they found out how often I masturbated?! Apparently it was intimidating) or that they would treat me like a girl they could fuck but not 'girlfriend material'. I hate keeping secrets so I would never swing behinds someone's back. What are people's experiences?!" I was lucky I met my boyfriend on here. Been togetger over 2 years now. My previous partners I told because it was something I wanted to try with them and we did mff a few times x | |||
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"I wouldnt get involved in a relationship unless with someone that had swung before, all history is out there then, no skeletons in the closest" Certainly that would be the best option in my view, likely to be sexually open minded, not intimidated by a partner with a varied and high sex drive and not put off by the swinging lifestyle | |||
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"Once a swinger always a swinger. I think it would be very hard to put this particular thing back in Pandora's box. Be honest and talk it through. If they throw a wobbler about it, they are probably not for you. If they say they'll have a little think about it then give them some space and you never know you might have found someone you can grow to love a lot. " I agree it's not easy to stop swinging if you've really enjoyed it but my friend is living proof you can. She's very much in love and freely admits she misses the lifestyle at times but loves what she has with him more. | |||
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"Do your friends/ family etc know that you are a swinger? Would you be happy with them knowing? The risk with telling a new partner early on is that he might be horrified and tell the whole world. Some people think that swinging is a terrible thing. She's right. It's awful. I hate it " x P.S. I'm not a Daily Mail reporter. It's an utter coincidence that this morning there was a thread about Daily Mail/ Facebook people slagging off Swingers. | |||
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"I have this trouble too. I like swinging and attending clubs etc, and ideally want someone I can do this with. But I meet girls in "real life" (for want of a better word) and start getting to know them, and worry that if I tell them about it it will freak them out completely! Yeah it's weird for me because I'm so open sexually, and I'm not usually phased by anything. But if I like a guy and in the early stages of dating he's very forward with sex it just puts off! I'm such a hypocrite " I think you will find that a lot of men find sexual confidence in a woman a huge turn on, I know I do. Having said that it is probably best not to bring it up on a first date, drop subtle hints into conversation on later dates and see how they react.. Lets be honest we are male and you woman can read us like books so it should not be to hard to work out if the date is up for it or not | |||
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"Hey everyone! So I can't imagine I'm the first to post a thread regarding this topic and I apologise if it's already been done to death. Basically I'm very new to the swinging scene and I've met some lovely people, but I've been single for over 2 years and wouldn't mind meeting someone special! So my question is, if I meet someone I really like do I tell them that I'm a swinger? I would quit the scene for the right person, but I would worry that if I told them they would be put off (someone I dated in the past was put off when they found out how often I masturbated?! Apparently it was intimidating) or that they would treat me like a girl they could fuck but not 'girlfriend material'. I hate keeping secrets so I would never swing behinds someone's back. What are people's experiences?!" Why not find some one in the swinging scene xx | |||
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"Hey everyone! So I can't imagine I'm the first to post a thread regarding this topic and I apologise if it's already been done to death. Basically I'm very new to the swinging scene and I've met some lovely people, but I've been single for over 2 years and wouldn't mind meeting someone special! So my question is, if I meet someone I really like do I tell them that I'm a swinger? I would quit the scene for the right person, but I would worry that if I told them they would be put off (someone I dated in the past was put off when they found out how often I masturbated?! Apparently it was intimidating) or that they would treat me like a girl they could fuck but not 'girlfriend material'. I hate keeping secrets so I would never swing behinds someone's back. What are people's experiences?! Why not find some one in the swinging scene xx " | |||
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"Hey everyone! So I can't imagine I'm the first to post a thread regarding this topic and I apologise if it's already been done to death. Basically I'm very new to the swinging scene and I've met some lovely people, but I've been single for over 2 years and wouldn't mind meeting someone special! So my question is, if I meet someone I really like do I tell them that I'm a swinger? I would quit the scene for the right person, but I would worry that if I told them they would be put off (someone I dated in the past was put off when they found out how often I masturbated?! Apparently it was intimidating) or that they would treat me like a girl they could fuck but not 'girlfriend material'. I hate keeping secrets so I would never swing behinds someone's back. What are people's experiences?! Why not find some one in the swinging scene xx " Blushing miss xx | |||
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"I'd imagine you could find a partner who is also a swinger pretty easily... " Nope...tbh, I'd quite like to meet someone open to the idea of a closer relationship...have feelings for each other n what not and swing together. But single guys just don't seem to want to (not that ive met many out of clubs tbh) They put it quite clear, in a roundabout way, early on. Which is fine...i have a choice, but, well, for me, that's why its just easier to meet in clubs only. Crystal clear then. I guess I just need to meet more single guys out of clubs perhaps...up the chances?! | |||
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"I'd imagine you could find a partner who is also a swinger pretty easily... Nope...tbh, I'd quite like to meet someone open to the idea of a closer relationship...have feelings for each other n what not and swing together. But single guys just don't seem to want to (not that ive met many out of clubs tbh) They put it quite clear, in a roundabout way, early on. Which is fine...i have a choice, but, well, for me, that's why its just easier to meet in clubs only. Crystal clear then. I guess I just need to meet more single guys out of clubs perhaps...up the chances?! " I think honesty in this case isn't a good thing if you are looking for a good guy he doesn't want to know what you've been up to and as a gentleman shouldn't tell you what he's been up to xxx but if the relationship is to be one where you carry on doing this but together I don't see that as having longevity | |||
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"I'd imagine you could find a partner who is also a swinger pretty easily... Nope...tbh, I'd quite like to meet someone open to the idea of a closer relationship...have feelings for each other n what not and swing together. But single guys just don't seem to want to (not that ive met many out of clubs tbh) They put it quite clear, in a roundabout way, early on. Which is fine...i have a choice, but, well, for me, that's why its just easier to meet in clubs only. Crystal clear then. I guess I just need to meet more single guys out of clubs perhaps...up the chances?! " Most women say there are getting too many messages to reply to on here! None of those guys are also open to a relationship? | |||
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"I'd imagine you could find a partner who is also a swinger pretty easily... Nope...tbh, I'd quite like to meet someone open to the idea of a closer relationship...have feelings for each other n what not and swing together. But single guys just don't seem to want to (not that ive met many out of clubs tbh) They put it quite clear, in a roundabout way, early on. Which is fine...i have a choice, but, well, for me, that's why its just easier to meet in clubs only. Crystal clear then. I guess I just need to meet more single guys out of clubs perhaps...up the chances?! I think honesty in this case isn't a good thing if you are looking for a good guy he doesn't want to know what you've been up to and as a gentleman shouldn't tell you what he's been up to xxx but if the relationship is to be one where you carry on doing this but together I don't see that as having longevity " There are plenty of couples on here that met swinging and they have been together ages. Why would it lack longevity? | |||
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"Thanks for all you replies everyone! In terms of meeting someone on here I just thought that if a guy is on here he's looking for fun not a relationship! " Some are, some aren't. There are other single women that put on their profile that they were looking for the potential for a relationship and it's worked for them. At the end of the day, there are a lot more women on here than men so the odds are in your favour... | |||
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"Personally I much prefer honesty in my intimate relationships, but it seems a lot of people prefer not to know what they can't handle." Sadly, I have found this to be true, too. | |||
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"Thanks for all you replies everyone! In terms of meeting someone on here I just thought that if a guy is on here he's looking for fun not a relationship! " all guys look for fun and as you can see here all women to ,so its a chance you take ,life's a roulette wheel let yourself spin a few times and see which good guy you end up with ,he may be a winner | |||
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"Hey everyone! So I can't imagine I'm the first to post a thread regarding this topic and I apologise if it's already been done to death. Basically I'm very new to the swinging scene and I've met some lovely people, but I've been single for over 2 years and wouldn't mind meeting someone special! So my question is, if I meet someone I really like do I tell them that I'm a swinger? I would quit the scene for the right person, but I would worry that if I told them they would be put off (someone I dated in the past was put off when they found out how often I masturbated?! Apparently it was intimidating) or that they would treat me like a girl they could fuck but not 'girlfriend material'. I hate keeping secrets so I would never swing behinds someone's back. What are people's experiences?!" it really depends on the person of i am honest. I knew my ex was a swinger even before i was with her or a swinger myself. The only person who knows what advauce to take would be your self as each persons have differing levels of acceptance and nonacceptance each to their own in other words. I did not mind my gf swinging i found it positively arpusing knowing she was swinging but some people may find it off putting. | |||
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"I'm in the same boat.... I'm leaning towards not telling them, and if the sex life dies down a little in the coming years I'll bring it up then. I'd rather have love than fun sex." | |||
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"I'm in the same boat.... I'm leaning towards not telling them, and if the sex life dies down a little in the coming years I'll bring it up then. I'd rather have love than fun sex. " | |||
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