FabSwingers.com forum: I tried

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Read so many threads recently about how women on here just delete messages without reading them. I am guilty of this and decided to. Try the polite route. It has just taken 10 messages before I blocked to explain he was way to young for me. I go back to my rude old ways and delete as soon as I see something that isn't floating my boat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Read so many threads recently about how women on here just delete messages without reading them. I am guilty of this and decided to. Try the polite route. It has just taken 10 messages before I blocked to explain he was way to young for me. I go back to my rude old ways and delete as soon as I see something that isn't floating my boat "

Ive done this a few times, going down the polite route, only to keep being asked why Ive said no and wont I change my mind. Its too awkward as I wont say why I wont, I just say no politely.

Like you, I just delete now.

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By *ivnwcplCouple
over a year ago

liverpool

The polite route only works with a very small percentage,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *ty31Man
over a year ago

NW London

From the male perspective it's worse when a message just sits in someone's inbox unread. I prefer either a delete or a polite "no thanks"- or even a "fuck off!"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

may consider the fuck off option next time x

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By *emini1637Woman
over a year ago

Warwickshire

I too tried this a while ago, feeling it would be better to politely say thanks but no thanks, but the amount of guys that asked why and then got offended when I politely told them my reasons was quite high so I have now gone back to deleting them too

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"
it wouldn't take 10 attempts to get the desired effect.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I've variously responded to everybody as well as been selectively.

It can be a really tough, very time consuming job replying to everybody, so I generally aim to reply to people who've put some good effort into messaging me, or those who may be of interest. Until I employ a full time PA I'm not returning to replying to all messages, as I just don't typically have the time, energy or inclination to, as well as the reality that time spent on replying to those I'm not meeting prevents me from pursuit of things that desperately need my attention.

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By *kindofmagicXXXMan
over a year ago

Bristol

Polite route works with me as I like to be polite myself. A fuck off is fine as at least I know!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do try to respond to most messeges but they often end on a bad note with me disagreeing with their "age is just a number" comments or being told that I'm racist cus i only meet white guys or the guy turning angry and declaring "well you're a slapper anyway" or "fat ugly cow i wouldn't touch you with a barge pole" type comment or even worse full blown nasty abuse !

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"I do try to respond to most messeges but they often end on a bad note with me disagreeing with their "age is just a number" comments or being told that I'm racist cus i only meet white guys or the guy turning angry and declaring "well you're a slapper anyway" or "fat ugly cow i wouldn't touch you with a barge pole" type comment or even worse full blown nasty abuse !"

I've had that, now is delete and block...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had that, now is delete and block..."

Yep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best way from my point of view is never to expect...

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

If I am feeling polite and decide I will try and answer with a polite no thanks I refuse to get drawn into a conversation with them if they come back with a why etc. I sent them a reply telling them I wasn't interested, I don't feel the need to keep saying no thanks. 1 no then ignore.... a block if they don't stop.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've tried, it went ok for a few days then they message you again not long after going on about carrying on the conversation from before (which was you rejecting them and not a conversation).

You don't have to justify how you use this site. You're here for you and to find mutual people into what you are, that is all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not everyone rude and usually after few messages they stop if they wasting time , just coz minority not receive mes doesn't mean rest of us ain't overloaded and hard keep up , it usually how they answer emails or gut feelin or profile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The same for any profile really, I have politely refused couples or ladies and got abuse back, I do generally stay polite with any reply, and block and report any actual childish abuse / insults.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've often been disappointed and almost hurt that I don't receive a reply, and it's worse when I'm just blocked without reply. Anyone who has said no thanks to me will testify that replying to me and saying for instance "thanks but your not my type" is normally met with a "thanks and good luck" and then I block them to make sure I don't message again by mistake.

The bit that frustrates me is that if they don't reply I don't know if it's because they are too busy or just not interested, and if I block them and they are just busy, I might be missing out in the future. So it really buggers my system up lol

However I've been messaged by a few men offering a bj, despite me being very much straight and I've now seen with my own eyes just how much blokes do not take no for an answer and for that reason I understand why women do what they do.

As for my pet hate, striking up a fun and engaging conversation then sharing pictures, then being completely ignored. I know I'm not everyone's cup of tea, but by ignoring someone on the grounds of looks alone after a lovely chat, well that just makes her a rude, ignorant shallow bitch!, in these circumstances a polite message isn't too much to ask for

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By *ivinefoxWoman
over a year ago

Coventry

I've also tried replying politely but they still want to chat or persuade you so now I also block a profile when I delete it.

However I have contacted people because of posts in the forums or sometimes people who've fabbed my pics!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've just set up message filters so that people we don't want can't message us x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

may consider the fuck off option next time x"

We got a warning for doing that...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

may consider the fuck off option next time x

We got a warning for doing that..."

Lucky i didn't, but the guy who messaged me was really horrible and i reported his message and said in the report i'd told him to fuck off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This site would be better without a sent box to look at. As it is, too many people fret over whether a msg was read or not, or deleted or not. C'mon folks, send your message and accept that if you don't get a reply you're not going to meet them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm exactly the same... I've blocked single men now, as most of the time they'd reply to a polite "no thanks" message with an argument. Which wouldn't up their chances with me, in all honesty. Makes me wonder if they try the same persuasion technique on women in the real world...

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By *ivinefoxWoman
over a year ago

Coventry

I haven't blocked single guys as just occasionally a nice one pops through and I'm an eternal optimist...

Someone wrote in a different thread that there should be a 'thanks but you're not what I'm looking for' option

instead of just a delete button, I think that's a really good idea!

Maybe they could add that to the site supporters extras to get a bit more income !!

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By *retty womanWoman
over a year ago

Near Bournemouth

"I haven't blocked single guys as just occasionally a nice one pops through and I'm an eternal optimist...

Someone wrote in a different thread that there should be a 'thanks but you're not what I'm looking for' option

instead of just a delete button, I think that's a really good idea!

Maybe they could add that to the site supporters extras to get a bit more income !!"

They had that option once.

I personally reply to all that have read my profile, I think it's rude not to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its not rude to delete though. Its your choice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tend to be polite an say no thanks if the person's made an effort with their message if not I just delete!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"From the male perspective it's worse when a message just sits in someone's inbox unread. I prefer either a delete or a polite "no thanks"- or even a "fuck off!""

Sir I salute you

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

I must say if a couple or fem said no thanks, I would say thanks have a good time swinging.....

Would I block no...would I remove from hotlist maybe depends

For me I would rather be told that I am not what they are looking for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whenever I message someone new, I always add "if you're not interested, just delete and I'll take the hint, otherwise drop me a line"

If someone does delete, I make a note on their profile that they deleted so I don't mail them again...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Whenever I message someone new, I always add "if you're not interested, just delete and I'll take the hint, otherwise drop me a line"

If someone does delete, I make a note on their profile that they deleted so I don't mail them again..."
I tried to take this approach with single guys in the end I just blocked them all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is not impolite to not be interested. Like you responding suggests interest and messages keep coming. It's like blocking. It's just a useful tool too filter out those who are not for you.

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By *rlicker123Man
over a year ago

gillingham kent

ill aske if the answer is no that's it ill never message you again .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We say a polite no then instantly block on quiet days so they cant ask why. On busy days we just delete. A couple of guys say why did you just delete but most accept it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd like to know what Been Read means if not subsequently Deleted. Too busy to reply, too overwhelmed with emotion to reply or a quirk in the system and it really has been deleted?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Some messages I receive are one liners and I can read the message without opening it or 'reading' it and if it's boring or dull or tiresome or unimaginative or anything else negative, I delete it.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I always reply, if they won't take no for an answer they get blocked quite quickly.

Unless I'm in the mood for winding someone up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really dont get why people get hung up on a msg being replied. At the end of the day if you are interested you will reply and no reply obviously means you are not its quite simple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd like to know what Been Read means if not subsequently Deleted. Too busy to reply, too overwhelmed with emotion to reply or a quirk in the system and it really has been deleted?"

it means exactly what it says .there is no time restriction on messages, you're not obliged to delete them imediatly..dont really understand what difference it makes...if you have no reply then thats your answer...what has subsequently happened with the message is surely irelevant?

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

"From the male perspective it's worse when a message just sits in someone's inbox unread. I prefer either a delete or a polite "no thanks"- or even a "fuck off!""

This has already been said on previous threads related to this subject, it is best to send the message and then delete it; this way you don't know what action the recipient has taken - fire and forget! It's a pleasant surprise then if you get a reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've often been disappointed and almost hurt that I don't receive a reply, and it's worse when I'm just blocked without reply. Anyone who has said no thanks to me will testify that replying to me and saying for instance "thanks but your not my type" is normally met with a "thanks and good luck" and then I block them to make sure I don't message again by mistake.

No it doesn't make her a rude, shallow, ignorant, bitch. This site at its core is a sex site. For most women sex needs attraction and if they're not attracted to you then what should they do - meet you anyway full well knowing that they won't fuck you. This kind of comment sickens me tbh and won't do you any favors.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's nice to be polite but if some people don't understand that the lady dosnt like them I don't think you can blame them for blocking them.

Your not my type!

Thanks for the reply have fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't understand why someone would ask why. A resounding 'No' or 'Sorry not for me' is all I need. I just reply with 'Thanks for replying, I appretiate it'

Though I've not messaged anyone in a while unless they are already on my friends list.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *rs TootyWoman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I reply to all mails and find most accept if I say no.

Some ask to continue chatting and continue asking to meet.

It's on my profile I'm not arranging meets. So like others I'm beginning to just delete and not reply. I hate doing that as I find it rude but it's draining continually saying no thanks. Justifying why I won't send pics or just meet for a social..

Stinks of desperation and gets me grumpy.

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