FabSwingers.com forum: Nervous other half

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So my other half is nervous about joining in the swinger scene - can anyone give any advice or best way to ease her into things?

Thanks!

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By *tarbeckCouple
over a year ago

york

"So my other half is nervous about joining in the swinger scene - can anyone give any advice or best way to ease her into things?

Thanks!"
put her on your profile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does she know you have a profile here ? That might be a good starting point talking about that and any meets you have had

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So my other half is nervous about joining in the swinger scene - can anyone give any advice or best way to ease her into things?

Thanks! put her on your profile "

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"So my other half is nervous about joining in the swinger scene - can anyone give any advice or best way to ease her into things?

Thanks!"

Ask her to talk to you about it and really listen to what she says, encourage her to open up and answer any questions she might have honestly. Maintain that honesty throughout and discuss all your fears and doubts with her too.

When it comes to her actually having sex with another man there is no easing in to it, she either does or she doesn't.

All the above is written on the understanding that she has already expressed an interest in swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So my other half is nervous about joining in the swinger scene - can anyone give any advice or best way to ease her into things?

Thanks!"

Not for me to judge but if she is unaware of your profile here then delete it and communicate with her. If she is aware of it, then communicate with her.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for all the replies.

Yes she is aware of the profile and helped put it together and has had a look around the site - she is just unsure of being on it herself or taking the next step.

Will chat about it again this evening with her!

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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago

Wherever the party is!

"So my other half is nervous about joining in the swinger scene - can anyone give any advice or best way to ease her into things?

Thanks!"

Consensual is one of the three key principles we abide by. She should really do what she wants to do.

Personally, I think if she has to be persuaded or "eased into" anything, then not only is it possibly not for her but it may end up not being fun for the other parties involved.

Hope this helps.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take her to a social or a swing club where she can get to know people and see how she likes it and without the pressure on sorting a meet or having sex straight away.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There must be lots of people who are just to nervous to get started,i would love to join a group who would just chat to start off until we got to know each other,then it would be easier to find out how far people want to go and develope trust and all have there fantasies fulfilled .

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By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

As said take her to a club where she can mingle.

Vanilla alternatives is brilliant for a first club visit. If you don't want to play you can stay in the bar all night and it is just like any other night out. Or you can go and play with just each other.

It's worth it just for the experience alone.....

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By *hocko87Man
over a year ago

dublin

A lot of married women think they r cheating on their spouses when there starting out unlike guys who r usually gagging for it . So IDE say don't presure her take it nice n slowely n going to a club sounds a very good idea but with no pressure unless u want to loose ur wife . It would not b worth it would it .

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By *orders-cplCouple
over a year ago

middx cpl

Take her to a swingers club with the idea of just watching looking at the lifestyle and chatting to other couples put her mind at rest then talk to her about it when you get home

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By *aveandkate35Couple
over a year ago

telford

"As said take her to a club where she can mingle.

It's worth it just for the experience alone....."

I'd echo this sentiment. Most clubs are the same but much check the reviews and website here as personally I'd avoid those who have paid girls in them - especially for a first visit.

Our first experience in the swinging world was in a club, so understand the nerves and thoughts that go through your head.

We went with the attitude that whatever happens if we wake up the next day and decide it was all a big mistake, then we don't blame each other and just move on. As it turned out we were the last ones in being asked to leave.

it was amazing!

Remember when your talking her fears may be a lot different to yours. Talk talk talk - and be honest. Swinging is not somewhere to be dishonest as it will come back on you 10 fold!

I know from speaking to others a lot of women question the motives of a man suggesting it - "is it because he wants someone else?" "Doesn't he love me anymore?" "Is our sex life not interesting enough???" And loads more - talk it through.

When I first suggested Kate have solo meets, even though we'd been swinging a while she still wondered if I was only suggesting it so I could have solo meets. This wasn't the case, but whether it is or isn't, you need to talk. And dont stop.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

A previous thread on a similar theme got us talking about this the other evening, Both of us were swingers when we met on here, and both gave up swinging for other partners. Neither of us had broached it with other partners, because we are both of the opinion that 'easing in' is not a good thing, it would have been manipulative and something that was not what our partner at the time would have enjoyed - and there was no problem, no pressure, no pushing with that. I do find this pushing or easing the other partner in idea a bit disturbing, to be honest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take pictures of her vag and print them off. Sellotape said pictures to lampposts around your local area. Perhaps pop a few shots through the neighbours letterbox.

Allow the local community to admire her minge. Once everyone has seen it she'll be much more relaxed.

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By *ig Ted 66Man
over a year ago

Hinckley

"Take pictures of her vag and print them off. Sellotape said pictures to lampposts around your local area. Perhaps pop a few shots through the neighbours letterbox.

Allow the local community to admire her minge. Once everyone has seen it she'll be much more relaxed. "

^^^ this is pure genius ! Anyone considering introducing a partner or a new playmate should follow these perfect guidelines. Instant results guaranteed (of some sort or another!!).

BT x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

all above but If she wants to she will if she don't she won't but pushing her could create you more issues

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"all above but If she wants to she will if she don't she won't but pushing her could create you more issues"

All of the above? Not so sure about the public posters of her lady garden...

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By *appypear12Couple
over a year ago

huntingdon

Take her to a club meet make freinds and wAtch it will all b normal to her very soon

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

Taking her to a club will scare the shit out of her!

I recommend the Life on the Swingset podcast, thats how we started out and it Really helped us.

But if you guys wanted to meet up for a chat about swinging, we are just round the corner from you op. Let's us know, we would be happy to help.

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By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

Everyone is nervous to start with! It is hard to tell you what to do as we are all different, but we approached it by talking about what we wanted and what we were comfortable with. At first we were both quite restrictive as we didn't want to hurt each other, but over time we have realised that we both enjoy soooo much more and our boundaries are way wider than they were. Our only advice would be take your time, try different clubs and work out what you both want. Enjoy

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