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Couples .... Who started it?

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By *awandOrder OP   Couple
over a year ago

SW London

Late night discussion .... as per usual with us, and off the back of some of the thread here this evening.

If you were a couple before you started swinging, where did the idea come from? Who started the ball rolling? If you did, how do you know your partner really wants to do it and is not doing it just to please you? Did you have to 'coerce' in any way to begin with, even emotionally use emotional tactics ...

And, as a follow up, as it has changed, now what?

I have heard, from many people, that often the man instigated, but when the woman gets a taste, she becomes the driver in it all, send even though he wants to back out and stop it all, she won't because she is enjoying it so much. Is this true for you? (don't think anyone would admit to it though)

We met in the site, so we know its mutual. However, we have been in situations where we are not sure the other is entirely comfortable ... and grown from it, by discussion and being open to the ideas and experiences of the other. Some we will never repeat, other situations we have changed the dynamic and become comfortable with. We are both very easy going in trying new experiences, but neither is happy if the other is not. We are both one hundred per cent able to talk about what we want and our deepest darkest desires. Pepper won't do anything unless she one hundred per cent wants to, black cop will try anything once.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been interested in swinging if I'm honest since I was about 12 when I watch quadrophenia, when they gate crash party and the all shagging later, 33 years ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We met in the site, so we know its mutual. However, we have been in situations where we are not sure the other is entirely comfortable ... and grown from it, by discussion and being open to the ideas and experiences of the other. Some we will never repeat, other situations we have changed the dynamic and become comfortable with. We are both very easy going in trying new experiences, but neither is happy if the other is not. We are both one hundred per cent able to talk about what we want and our deepest darkest desires. Pepper won't do anything unless she one hundred per cent wants to, black cop will try anything once. "

Only quoting part because thats the part that rings true to us. I Cin got Ginger into the swinging and then into cuckolding. We talk though about our do's/don'ts and after every meet to make sure we're both comfortable still. I know there are desires I have that will never get explored but thats fine as wouldn't want Ginger to ever be doing something she's not happy to do and vice versa. Obviously with our particular kink/fetish if she does take the driving seat won't be a bad thing in my eyes as long as everything was still out in the open

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I asked R what his fantasies were after we'd had a weekend playing out some other fantasies we had discussed.

His response at that time were to be watched and a threesome, which matched with mine. I sent him a link to a swingers club as I'd fantasised about attending one for years.

It never felt like either side was being coerced as it was so exciting and we talk for hours about things before moving onto the next level, eg we visited clubs a few times before we decide we were comfortable involving others.

Never pressure only excitement for our last and next adventure.

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By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews

When C and I got together he asked what experience I had, which was minimal. So he said he was going to take me swinging, dogging etc. He's been doing this about 20 years. I was open to trying things, and it went from there

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By *aneandpaulCouple
over a year ago

cleveleys

We got married very young started reading girly Magazines in bed the stories ans letters turned us both on told Paul not to push me i would when it felt right.

We were on holiday when i got my second cock Paul was my first

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We were talking fantasies while having sex and built on it from there. We had a few half hearted attempts with friends that didn't lead anywhere but after having it first FFM we knew it was what we wanted more of.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For us, it first came up because we were talking about our fantasies (like what porn we watch, things we thought would be hot, etc.). Then Marc mentioned that he had heard about things called swinging clubs. We talked about it. Then it went away for a bit, but we kept talking about it.

We then agreed to go to one together, but we set basic rules - the most important of which was that we would stop immediately if one of us wanted to. Our first experience at a club was not good. So we stopped for a few months, but agreed to give it one more go. The second experience was much better, and things progressed from there.

We still talk to each other about everything we do, and don't do anything new unless we have talked about that too. While Marc knew about this scene, I would say that the initial interest was mutual, and no one pushed anyone else into anything.

Our experience so far has been so much fun. However, we still stand by the idea that the minute one of us wants to stop, we stop. No problems, explanations, or hang-ups.

-Courtney

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For us if we are honest it was her as he couldn't keep it on his pants lol ,so suggested swinging life which we both enjoy but he plays very little now days but both still enjoying none the less

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We met through Fab. He suggested setting up a couples profile after a few weeks but I wasn't sure. It was the same with going to clubs. I'm much more reserved and like Pepper need to be sure whereas he is much more go with the flow. He looks out for me though. We'll find our way as we communicate well and we talk about what works and what doesn't for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jack suggested it not long after we met. We left for a long time & I then suggested a profile.

If being honest I don't think he's really that keen on meeting others. We chat but never set a solid meet in place.

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By *cd and scruffCouple
over a year ago

Rochester

We met in a club so we know we are both happy with it.

But the main thing running thru every post is communication. It is my theory that couples who play have stronger relationships because there are no secrets. Like everyone else we talk about anything and everything. Likes, dislikes, fantasies etc and it pays dividends in the whole relationship.

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By *b coupleCouple
over a year ago

southampton

The ball started rolling for us after a very heavy drinking session with another couple and I guess one thing led to another.

4 years ago today lol

Carnival fun.

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By *awandOrder OP   Couple
over a year ago

SW London

All very interesting reading as I think there is an assumption that Mr started it ... and Mrs was dragged along. We did find it weird suddenly swinging as a couple after being singles. Now the coupledom has totally taken over. I think if we continued or not, we would still talk about and share everything, and tackle everything together. that is the nature of our relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For us it started last week. We discussed our sex life and the fact that we were far more sexual when we first met a year ago than we are today. Last year we were sending naughty texts to each other and photos. It died down for a while and soon became a once in a while sex session. We had a conversation about getting it back, so, whilst my partner was at work I informed her that I had set up an account on this site. I informed her that the same evening I was going to make public some of our pictures and take some more

Next thing I know she had posted the first image herself when she was at work. In the evening we took some photos and had loads of fabs. It snowballed from there. We have had some lovely messages from other couple encouraging us and asking for a social meet. I told them that only my.partner can make those decisions. We have not yet met anyone but she has said yes to meeting them. She has also flirted with single guys on here and messaged some couples herself.once I put the idea in her head she has run with it and is more intrigued to explore this area of our sex life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

enjoying reading this. as me and my partner have discussed it a few times. I think we're both interested in going to watch others and be watched atm. did anyone else start of as voyeurs? I'd love to see her with someone else male or female but definitely want to take things slow

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I think that it was probably me (Cal). We had been discussing fantasies (like we had many times before) and the two most common fantasies that Anita had were a MFM threesome and playing with another girl.

I decided to investigate swinging as a way to achieve these fantasies and then I shared my "research" with Anita and left her to do some of her own. This included reading a couple of books written by the guy who now owns La Chambre club. Ultimately, Anita decided that she'd like us to visit a club and the rest is history.

Cal

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By *ivnwcplCouple
over a year ago

liverpool


"Late night discussion .... as per usual with us, and off the back of some of the thread here this evening.

If you were a couple before you started swinging, where did the idea come from? Who started the ball rolling? If you did, how do you know your partner really wants to do it and is not doing it just to please you? Did you have to 'coerce' in any way to begin with, even emotionally use emotional tactics ...

And, as a follow up, as it has changed, now what?

I have heard, from many people, that often the man instigated, but when the woman gets a taste, she becomes the driver in it all, send even though he wants to back out and stop it all, she won't because she is enjoying it so much. Is this true for you? (don't think anyone would admit to it though)

We met in the site, so we know its mutual. However, we have been in situations where we are not sure the other is entirely comfortable ... and grown from it, by discussion and being open to the ideas and experiences of the other. Some we will never repeat, other situations we have changed the dynamic and become comfortable with. We are both very easy going in trying new experiences, but neither is happy if the other is not. We are both one hundred per cent able to talk about what we want and our deepest darkest desires. Pepper won't do anything unless she one hundred per cent wants to, black cop will try anything once. "

Easy .....The wife was a slut

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By *ipswingCouple
over a year ago

portrush

we had an old friend of mine staying for the weekend

when bed time called ..i asked sweet could he join us...

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By *esi tardkaCouple
over a year ago

acton

For us it was me or you can you can say mutual ...he is to much of a wife lover .. During sex we discussed our fantasise, I've always had things for his work mates .. Or his brothers . He then got me to wear short dresses without panties to flash his work mates or his brothers unknowingly avoiding them to get a shock .. This led to me sleeping with most of his work mates and got labeled as a slut .. I did get him to sleep with my cousins on different occasions .. This is the best lifestyle we have chosen ..

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire


"Couples .... Who started it?"

First rule of marriage:

If it's good, she started it,

If it's bad, he started it.

Or is that just us?

Mr ddc

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By *awandOrder OP   Couple
over a year ago

SW London


"Couples .... Who started it?

First rule of marriage:

If it's good, she started it,

If it's bad, he started it.

Or is that just us?

Mr ddc"

We did exactly the same with the wallpaper we put up in our son's room - if you like it, it was mum's idea, if you are not keen, it was dad's .. he liked it and I confessed - it was not my idea

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By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

For us, it was me (m) who raised the idea. We talked for a little while and agreed to go to a club to see what it felt like. We were both like rabbits in headlights, neither wanting to donanything that would hurt the other. We talked after and realised we were just concerned for each others feelings and our feelings for each other. Since then we have been much more open about what we want, who we want and what we are happy with.

Ultimately it has been a journey for us, learning about what we want and having fun on the way! Talking to each other has made all the difference...

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By *rish_And_BlondieCouple
over a year ago

Liverpool and Ireland

All me. Irish knew I had a BDSM past before we met 6 years ago. I dabbled in a lot of photoshoots and the odd very low budget film as a very young and naive 18 year old - was actually incredibly stupid of me now I look back at how dangerous some of it was going it alone but I had a serious sexual desire that needed fulfilling and a huge sex drive and the only people I met in that industry could fulfil it.

Then I met Irish... Love came into play... Kids came and we stayed extremely filthy with each other but I was either going to have to go have an affair which I could never bring myself to do or approach the subject with him to start getting back into the lifestyle. At first we said maybe just a bit of soft play.. But we both got a huge taste and are open to anything and everything. It's crazy how one little hint at a threesome can lead to huge sex parties, different room full swaps, gangbangs the works. But it's hands down the best thing I ever did for us both. It's hugely strengthened our relationship No end. Massively. Brought us back together and were so in love like teenagers again. All because we like to fuck others hahaha. Isn't life simple eh.

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By *anda and CatCouple
over a year ago

.

We both mentioned it in a jokey way for a few years, always wondered if the other was serious then one day I took it a bit further and found this place on my mobile and we went to our first club 6 weeks later, we're still very inexperienced at it but now we both openly people watch and it also brought out a side to her that I hoped was there

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By *ust Ms LovinWoman
over a year ago

birmingham

Not a issue for us we met as singles on the site , takes all the bullshit out of it and we both understand there's a massive difference between sex and love xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It was a fantasy of Clarences for years to watch me with another man. So after years of talking on and off I finally bit the bullet and booked a night staying at a swingers club as a surprise for him!

We took it slow and discussed everything at each stage!

But like others have said I definitely hot a taste for it. So initiated by Clarence but I take the driving seat! But if either needs a break or to stop for good it would happen immediately x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love this thread! Some very sweet stories and isn't it so clear that communication is the key.

I (m) suggested his site but as we'd met at a sex/play party that some mutual friends held and been to a few other clubs and parties since it was more progression and an avenue to explore. We were filthy fuckers before we met but exploring as a couple has been new for us both. Like some others have shared we have unconditional vetoes and can request we stop at anytime without having to explain anything although of course we'd talk about it after.

Also we're currently 'soft swing'. Only which basically means not fucking others...it's not off the table and we talk about it sometimes but we like to progress at a pace that works for us and like to really explore ideas before moving ahead....besides there's so much firmly rickety that can be had othe than PiV sex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All very interesting reading as I think there is an assumption that Mr started it ... and Mrs was dragged along. We did find it weird suddenly swinging as a couple after being singles. Now the coupledom has totally taken over. I think if we continued or not, we would still talk about and share everything, and tackle everything together. that is the nature of our relationship. "

Not with us, she made the profile then laid hints about threesomes. Only after about say two three weeks she told me about this site and the fact we had a profile.... I was shocked at first but thought hey this could be fun.

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