FabSwingers.com forum: Not getting meets

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

We took an enforced break from the scene for most of this year and since we've been back we've not managed to get a single meet arranged. Ok, we need a few days notice to organise meeting up but is tht a problem? Wonder if someone would take a look at our profile and give us a few pointers please? I'm starting to wonder if mentioning my scars was a bad move but then again I'd hate to meet up with someone only to find they took one look and ran! Any (sensible) suggestions would be appreciated as I'm not the most confident of swingers in the first place...

Thanks,

Mrs R

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By *emjoCouple
over a year ago

Reading

A lot of the time you just find yourselves in the wrong area. You also only soft swing so you limit your market. It will happen. Don't give up.

If the comment about the scars is putting people off then you honestly don't want to meet them anyway.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks Jemjo.

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By *aravancoupleMan
over a year ago

A Secret Hideaway In the caravan of love

"We took an enforced break from the scene for most of this year and since we've been back we've not managed to get a single meet arranged. Ok, we need a few days notice to organise meeting up but is tht a problem? Wonder if someone would take a look at our profile and give us a few pointers please? I'm starting to wonder if mentioning my scars was a bad move but then again I'd hate to meet up with someone only to find they took one look and ran! Any (sensible) suggestions would be appreciated as I'm not the most confident of swingers in the first place...

Thanks,

Mrs R"

Scars don't put people off,it just takes time for people to get to know you and to trust you.

take a look at my scars and you will feel a lot better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't see anything wrong with your profile.

It will take you a few days to organise things, the same will apply to the couples you hope to meet, plus finding four way attraction.

I believe in being honest so it's important to mention your scars. How would you feel if someone recoiled in horror as you weren't "perfect"? That said I doubt that's the reason you're not getting meets: it's easy to hold onto a "negative" and hold that against others.

Relax, there's couples out there for you.

Good luck!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mrs Red has scars on her left and right breast. 1st scar reulted from a wide local excison DCIS and the 2nd lot from a bi lateral reduction following the wide local excision and do you know something ?

If they don't like her scars they can go screw themslves ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My god hope people arnt that shallow and dont feel u have to make excuses for others vanity its the mind that stimulates the body xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks. Looks like we've walked a similar path.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks. Looks like we've walked a similar path.

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By *arambarMan
over a year ago

swindon

As already mentioned, I don't think mentioning the scars would deter couples from contacting you, and it's definitely not something you should feel you have to shy away from.

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By *lack_BoltMan
over a year ago

oxford

Can't really disagree with anything that's been said so far. All I know is that it. Certainly wouldn't put me off at all. It's personal chemistry that's important. Our bodies are only part of our personalities. So wear your scars with pride.

Total respect to you _aravancouple for showing pix of your "bionic boob". You're an attractive woman despite the scars etc.

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By *raceyntonyCouple
over a year ago

london

Thanks,

Mrs R

Scars don't put people off,it just takes time for people to get to know you and to trust you.

take a look at my scars and you will feel a lot better

"
got to say u are one brave lady tracey xx

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By *aravancoupleMan
over a year ago

A Secret Hideaway In the caravan of love

Thanks,

Mrs R

Scars don't put people off,it just takes time for people to get to know you and to trust you.

take a look at my scars and you will feel a lot better

got to say u are one brave lady tracey xx"

I am not brave i am a live and just get on with life to the full,just because i have a bionic boob dose not mean i can't have any fun we have made a lot of friends on FAB

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey guys,

just read your profile, as if you'd emailed me for a meet. I think you need to sexy ur profile up a bit. Def lose the info about the scars, they arnt important, we all have bits of our body that we dont like/unsightly, so no need to highlight them in your profile. If you feel the need to prewarn potential meets you can tell them in the chat leading up to organising a meet.

The overall message i was picking up from your profile was scared and negative, which would be a turn off for potential couples. Lose the 'soft swing' and all your rules, again you can sort these things out with people on the actual date. I would keep the profile light and fun, show that you both are a nice, relaxed couple that are up for fun. I havent met people yet that were scary and hardcore, so the no this/no that wasnt a big issue. You can get a feel for that stuff from their profiles anyway.

good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry Oralminx, I have to disagree partly with what you say, in particular the bit about losing the soft swing part of their profile.

If the couple concerned are only into soft swing, then why shouldn't they say so on their profile ? Surely that will help to reduce the amount of full swing couples who would otherwise contact them ?

As for not discussing scars ? well that is a personal thing and if they feel better about disclosing the fact in their profile - why not ? Mentioning it in a public forum could actually be one way that the OP herself can start to accept what has happened to her. People cope with this type of thing in so many different ways.

Mrs Red has similar scars to the OP and she doesn't mention it on our profile, again that is simply down to choice - the scars are part of her, sge accepts them as 'normal' and doesn't even notice them now ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sI read your profile and certainly thought there is nothing there that would put us off!

But I do agree there is a slight feel of negativity about it.

The scar thing is not an issue and I would leave it there if you feel more comfortable with that.

But sometimes I think it is better to say what you do like to do, rather than what you don't!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks,

Mrs R"

stick to your guns, the meets will come.

we get loads of offers even with me having this moose in tow!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good luck, Mrs Rover, there's nothing at all wrong with your profile. Mentioning your scars isn't a problem - it shows that you're human, with human imperfections like the rest of us. And by putting it in your profile you are helping some judgemental people (who you wouldn't want to meet anyway) ' themselves out' without troubling you.

We all have times when we are more confident, and times when we are less confident. Keep your chin up, and the good times will return soon, I'm sure

xx S

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Def lose the info about the scars, they arnt important, we all have bits of our body that we dont like/unsightly, so no need to highlight them in your profile."

Above snipped for space.

The reason I quoted just the above part of the message is because I have scars - not where the OP has them but from a skin graft and the skin condition I have.

I never used to say about the scarring, I felt it was no ones business but my own, until I got chatting to someone (who was looking to meet me) and he saw the scarring as I stretched to get my cuppa when I was on cam one night. He was very unhappy and made me feel as if I was trying to "get one over" him, by not being open and upfront.

I now say what the condition I have is and that I have scarring on my profile - the reason is two fold - people who dont like scars can pass me by, and people are forewarned what to expect with me, the other reason is hardly anyone has heard of the condition I have.

To the OP:

Personally I put the lack of meets aranged down to time of year, the winter often causes people to slow down and stay in the warm. I would advise you carry on as is and see if things pick up in the spring, rather than change what you are happy with.

Shona

x x x

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