FabSwingers.com forum: new sextoy wants bdsm

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

hi everyone I need some advice as I have a new sex toy and she is really into BDSM but I don't really have a clue what to do I've done the odd bit of a spanking with her but she's craving more I've tied her up and she still wants more I don't know how far to go or how much to give her so that she satisfied I've tried talking to her but she's not certain but is into the BDSM scene and wants to be punished and pushed to her limits any advice and tips on what I can do for her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"hi everyone I need some advice as I have a new sex toy and she is really into BDSM but I don't really have a clue what to do I've done the odd bit of a spanking with her but she's craving more I've tied her up and she still wants more I don't know how far to go or how much to give her so that she satisfied I've tried talking to her but she's not certain but is into the BDSM scene and wants to be punished and pushed to her limits any advice and tips on what I can do for her"

It's not our thing but I woukd of thought you need to sit and talk some more. You can only push to someone's limits if you both know what they are.

Maybe Google is the answer to give yous a few pointers and what it is you both want and so you can set limits.

Limits and goals can always be changed or moved again in the future.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you talk and she trusts you it can be great. Just start having fun, restraints, blindfold, maybe invest in a paddle .

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah we have sat down and even come up with rules too. We have the bonus that we are not together in any capacity and just sex which has been great so far. We both don't want a relationship and are eager to have fun. She wants the whole fifty shades treatment. I'm happy to oblige even though its new to me I'm just good at what I normally do. And yes paddle is a good idea.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

My limits are quite low but she seems to want lots but can't explain herself. She wants public humiliation as far as I can tell and to be constantly punished.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My limits are quite low but she seems to want lots but can't explain herself. She wants public humiliation as far as I can tell and to be constantly punished."

Why not try going to a club as a lot of them on have people in the dungeon that can walk and talk you through things and maybe help.

Message a few local clubs and see if they do have a dungeon guru

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah that sounds like a good idea xx

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By *lttattoocoupleCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

There's a website about FETishLIFE

Which has lots and lots of content about learning more about bdsm.

I can post links but the Capitol letters will help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah that sounds like a good idea xx"

Why don't you go to a club on a special fet/bdsm night? There are plenty in the NW. I went unintentionally to one at Townhouse and it was really informative. Also, maybe try finding people on here who share your interests?

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By *ncutgemMan
over a year ago

Bath ish

Bring her to Bristol and I can hire a fet club to show you both the ropes and how to use them The studio is well equipped

and I have an associate to assist if required

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

Try reading some proper fetish stories. Not fifty shades.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

May i suggest getting in contact with "The unit" not only do gavin and stacey run a bdsm club that offers a safe enviroment to learn and play there many years experience is invaluable and they are always willing to assist and nothing to much trouble

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My limits are quite low but she seems to want lots but can't explain herself. She wants public humiliation as far as I can tell and to be constantly punished."

Read public humiliation porn or watch the videos.

You could do something mild like take her out sometime with jizz on her somewhere that you put on her after a kinky session, or something a bit more extreme like make her go out with a butt plug in and a short skirt and (in appropriate places) have her bend over to pick things up and when you can see her butt plug laugh at it and call her some names she likes (slut, dirty bitch or whatever then ask her how it feels up her and if she likes it, then when she answers tell her you know she loves it) or even other adults might see this too.

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT

Try the Fetish Events at Club Atlantis Evolution in Stoke-on-Trent. Second Sunday of every month and from August also on the fourth Sunday of every month.

Very friendly and welcoming with lots of people to give help and advice.

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By *omewhat_kinkyCouple
over a year ago

reigate

join the specialist site and search a local munch , there in a vanilla setting you can discuss BDSM with the people who are often willing to advise and coach you and your partner in the 'scene' jumping straight into a club tends to scare people away (we both work as DMs at a players club and have seen new couples arrive, tour the dungeon, see whats happening, walk to the door and run yes run to their car)so munches are advisable plus you will get to know people before venturing into the club scene (always better to go as a group or at least know people there who will advise you on ettiquette) also when in a club some people who are playing will have built up to that scene sometimes for weeks, so interrupting a scene in progress to ask where you that (insert name of toy here) is a big big no no.

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By *istressZoeTV/TS
over a year ago

cheshire

Go to a organised club night together x

Watch x learn and play x

Discover what you both enjoy and are comfortable with x

Enjoy! X

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By *eavenNhellCouple
over a year ago

carrbrook stalybridge

Maybe have a look at getting along to the unit for one of there specialist fetish events it's very local to you well run and very friendly .you will find the staff and regulars only to happy to help you both on your journey have fun

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