FabSwingers.com forum: wife

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm not looking for abuse of people. But would like advice.

Young married couple, but slowly losing out sex appetite together. I would love us to spice up the relationship. Buy not sure how. Any advice?

You might see I'm on here alone, have been for a while. Enjoy the flirts, stories and just chatting to others. Haven't met anyone yet, and not 100% sure I will.

Would love to explore more with Mrs or spice things up at home.

Advice or if u got any tricks please say. If not. No problems.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Speak to each other. There's no other way.

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

Flagrante

"I'm not looking for abuse of people. But would like advice.

Young married couple, but slowly losing out sex appetite together. I would love us to spice up the relationship. Buy not sure how. Any advice?

You might see I'm on here alone, have been for a while. Enjoy the flirts, stories and just chatting to others. Haven't met anyone yet, and not 100% sure I will.

Would love to explore more with Mrs or spice things up at home.

Advice or if u got any tricks please say. If not. No problems.

Does your wife know that you are on here?

As a couple, we are not on here to "spice up our relationship"....this is about adding something different to what is already a fantastic partnership. We share everything that happens on here and even when we go to the club and play with others, it's about pleasuring each other above everything. So maybe you and your wife need to talk through what you both want and work out a way to get it together....hope this makes sense?

Flik xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

No she doesn't know.

I'll have to sit down and discuss I think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The only answer is to sit and discuss it with your wife. We don't know her, we only have your side of the tale. The fact you're here without her knowledge says that something isn't working between you two.

Fix that before you try to get adventurous with her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask her. Not strangers on the net.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP do you have any idea how she will respond to you being bi-curious or is she already aware of that?

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

"I'm not looking for abuse of people. But would like advice.

Young married couple, but slowly losing out sex appetite together. I would love us to spice up the relationship. Buy not sure how. Any advice?

You might see I'm on here alone, have been for a while. Enjoy the flirts, stories and just chatting to others. Haven't met anyone yet, and not 100% sure I will.

Would love to explore more with Mrs or spice things up at home.

Advice or if u got any tricks please say. If not. No problems.

Does your wife know that you are on here?

Flik xx

Very good advice indeed.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Not a clue, curious that's all. Enjoy the thoughts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As others said; talk to her.

I told my lady I thought I was bi and she was very supportive.

We had been together for 11 years before I spoke up. My suppressed feelings were killing our relationship. Once out in the open the barriers dropped away.

We married shortly after as our relationship has gone from strength to strength.

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By *ornylilbastardMan
over a year ago

Warrington

Try some flavoured lube.. loads of different 1's.. cracking fun lickin an suckin the stuff off

Hope that helps a little

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I told my ex wife that I has Bi needs. She went ape shit on me and said I was a pervert and didn't give me any understanding whatsoever. Needless to say our marriage went from crisis to crisis, simple fact of matter is that if you don't work together or reject or blank out your partner without any recognition you that there is something you are not happy about something you are doomed to failure IMHO.

Thankfully Mrs N is a very liberal, understanding person. We work together at things, are very open about things that we come across and generally have good times together.

Hope your Mrs is the same

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would agree that you need to talk to her. In my opinion, being on this site without her knowledge, even if you aren't meeting, is a bit of a crutch. It let's you not feel the need to discuss these issues with her because you have a different outlet for them. I would be hurt if my husband came on here and flirted with women without telling me, even though I am more than happy to be here with him. Talk out your issues and I wish you the best of luck.

-Courtney

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By *oung-dreamCouple
over a year ago

nottingham

I would send her a delivery of something really sexy to wear with a note in it telling her to put it on and be waiting on the bed at a certain time the suspense should send he crazy

Or maybe send her a text telling her you will be taking her out for a meal wear a sexy dress with no panties underneath see how long you can stay at the restaurant

Kylie xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You sound very unsure... Possibly lacking in confidence, at least in terms of what to do.

As others have said...you need to speak to your wife...fully, all of your thoughts. That includes showing her your profile on here, maybe discussing setting up a couples profile?

If you are not up to showing her your profile then for now perhaps you should consider binning it...come back as a couple with luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not looking for abuse of people. But would like advice.

Young married couple, but slowly losing out sex appetite together. I would love us to spice up the relationship. Buy not sure how. Any advice?

You might see I'm on here alone, have been for a while. Enjoy the flirts, stories and just chatting to others. Haven't met anyone yet, and not 100% sure I will.

Would love to explore more with Mrs or spice things up at home.

Advice or if u got any tricks please say. If not. No problems.

simple as others have said talk to her tell what you would like in your sex life and ask her what she would like from sex , your married so you should be able to talk to her about anything

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By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

Communication is the only thing that will help you repair your relationship.

Fucking others will just break it far worse than it is now eventually.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Marriage takes two to tango

And your dancing by yourself

Talk to her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would send her a delivery of something really sexy to wear with a note in it telling her to put it on and be waiting on the bed at a certain time the suspense should send he crazy

Or maybe send her a text telling her you will be taking her out for a meal wear a sexy dress with no panties underneath see how long you can stay at the restaurant

Kylie xx"

That would really annoy me if my husband did that when we went through a low/no sex phase.

I was exhausted. Sex became yet another demand that I couldn't fulfill. The above ideas would have had me crying in a snivelling heap.

Talk to her. More importantly, LISTEN to her. Don't guess and don't assume. Listen to what she has to say.

My husband and I came here because he knows one of my "things" that makes me want loads of sex is other guys eyeing me up when we are out together.

It still took him 18 months to convince me to join this site. We've had a few meets (solo and couple) and it's been great fun.

But you can't guess. Ask her. And listen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd recommend forgetting about swinging as a means to spice up your failing sex life... its most likely to ruin your marriage if you come into it from that angle. Instead, as others have said, I'd focus on improving your own love life... perhaps book a holiday to some romantic destination, light some candles, put on the Barry White, and make some quality time for each other... if you were attracted before you should find that attraction rekindled. Then, further down the track, when you're both in a more secure place, loving the sex, just enquire as to whether she has any fantasies and go from there. Good luck

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By *ary_ArgyllMan
over a year ago

Argyll

"I would send her a delivery of something really sexy to wear with a note in it telling her to put it on and be waiting on the bed at a certain time the suspense should send he crazy

Or maybe send her a text telling her you will be taking her out for a meal wear a sexy dress with no panties underneath see how long you can stay at the restaurant

Kylie xx

That would really annoy me if my husband did that when we went through a low/no sex phase.

I was exhausted. Sex became yet another demand that I couldn't fulfill. The above ideas would have had me crying in a snivelling heap.

Talk to her. More importantly, LISTEN to her. Don't guess and don't assume. Listen to what she has to say.

My husband and I came here because he knows one of my "things" that makes me want loads of sex is other guys eyeing me up when we are out together.

It still took him 18 months to convince me to join this site. We've had a few meets (solo and couple) and it's been great fun.

But you can't guess. Ask her. And listen."

Yes above is very good point - it's natural for sexual passion to cool a bit, studies indicate about 6 months to a couple of years after sexual relations begin. However, if interest is really dropping off too much this becomes a problem - could be lots of reasons including stress, worry about other issues - only way to find out is to communicate - as everyone has said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't tell her about your profile, relationship suicide.

But certainly consider closing it, stop being on here.

Talk to her, introduce new suggestions, nothing to heavy.

She may not realise that you feel like you do and maybe perfectly happy or feel the same.

Don't expect radical overnight changes, she fell in love with you and if you love each other you will respect each other's feelings and desires, however like all relationships there is compromise.

We can't all like exactly the same thing.

She may have her own separate kink that may freak you out!!

Turn the tables imagine she is opening upto you how would you feel if she had an account on a swinger site?

Marriage has its peaks and troughs, if you are in a slump maybe she needs you to tell her how beautiful and sexy she is, feel sexy again.

A marriage is like a job you have to keep working.

Above all talk to her, but don't forget to listen to what she has to say.

Baby steps.

Good luck and I expect to see you unlos.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Btw what you are going through is perfectly normal, once the honeymoon period is over, people settle into a routine and get comfortable.

And that's why we get married to be with someone we can relax with and be comfortable, without having to make the constant effort to be amazing and look fabulous 24/7. That's what love is, finding someone sexy with morning breath and in ugly winter pj's.

Keeping the spark going tho is important a healthy sex life is a happy marriage.

But it's understanding that while every sex session won't be like your first time, you will still be lusting after each other when you least expect it.

We have been together almost 30 years and I still lust after jools every time I see her, even in her big unsexy period pants.

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By *ohjaneCouple
over a year ago

south staffs

Op - Is your wife on the pill ? The hormones in the pill can be fatal to some womens' libido. There are other ways to prevent pregnancies.

Have you just had a baby ? Is she not sleeping at night because of feeding/crying etc ?

Such things can be a cause for lower libido and loss of sexual expression.

Good luck

Jane x

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