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Relationship advice

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hi,

Hope this is ok to post here.

I met a woman on here in her late 30's who i think is gorgeous and i do fancy her. She is married but has said that she could easily fall in love with me and says she wants to meet (neither can accomodate). Everytime we chat on msn however she chats for 5 minutes then 'has to go' or is 'busy' and regularly says these things when i ask if she wants to chat.

We have met once, but again this was brief and she left after 5 minutes citing not feeling well.

Is she nervous about 'falling in love' with me or is she not interested and unsure how to express this.

Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated.

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

my personal _iew ... if she aint left her hubby then she aint gonna! id avoid this situation like the plague as either youll get one irrate hubby chapping at ur door or her excuses will just continue !is it really worth the hassle when plenty of single gals on the site or married ones who have their act together and are here for no strings fun ,not looking for the next best thing or an ego boost .

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

Avoid Avoid Avoid!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is a swingers site - if your looking for love try a dating site. Perhaps you are coming on too heavy for her and she's jusy loooking for a bit of fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The title of this thread and comments on your profile lead me to believe you're looking for a relationship: you won't find that with a married woman who's looking for nsa fun!

You're 22 why do you want to get embroiled in this woman's drama. She's doesn't even seem that into you, you're an ego boost.

If you have a tendency to get emotionally involved you have to ask yourself if swinging is really for you. How would you feel if you met a single woman your age who you liked who enjoyed the site by continuing to have sex with strangers? Does the thought tug at insides?

Only you can answer that.

Perhaps you should try dating sites before swinging, enjoy being young and single with other young and singles.

Good luck!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh honey she has a carrot and she's dangling it and like a good little boy you're following her every move.

Msn in fantasy land. So is fab. Wake up & smell the coffee.

You need to tell her actually 'I'm just not that into you' and stop being her lap dog.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well, you have 4 verifications from a woman in her 'late 30's' who has a partner according to her profile so it doesn't take Sherlock Holmes to work out who the woman you refer to is. Hope she's not in the habit of reading the forums

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I think ONE person will end up hurt..

and no prizes for guessing who..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

why dont u find someone who is available and stay clear of married women??? yes perhaps it is her that has everything to loose but you are not helping ...... find someone else!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also she seems to have met quite alot of other people since meeting you. I agree with the other posters.

You're only young, plenty of other single girls around to have fun with!

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

I think that as she has already said that she is married and looking for discrete fun only.

Yes she may have said she could fall in love with you but she didnt actually say she could leave her husband and maybe children and everything else for you did she?

That means she is having her cake and eating it and gets to play with your emotions at the same time.

Dont allow her to.

If you would like more than swinging then stick with a dating site.

I think you should stick with people more your own age and of the same status(single).

Maybe she is trying to let you down gently but by meeting loads of other people since meeting you she is showing that it isnt you she is wanting, but lots of cake.

Naturally a woman or man who is cheating on their partner is going to have to be careful when they come on msn,and phone chats and texts. She is going to have to lie through her teeth to do all this.

Her profile is clear she is looking for discete fun as in I am married so cant give you what you want.

I would suggest you ignore her and stop any contact with you as it sounds like you are the one wondering what is happening with the 2 of you and she is sat at home with her hubby happily still meeting people.

Stick with the young single ones that make you feel great about you and you make them feel great.

Am sure you have a lot to offer a young lass so enjoy your live and stay away from the married ones.

Good luck xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks for replies, all advice noted.

The woman who has left verifications is NOT the woman in question.

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Well that helps to understand. Even with that my reply would be the same.

Dont be the cake. Be a person that gets meets because your lovely and not an itch that her hubby isnt scratching.

Whoever the lady is,it is far easier to meet people that dont clock watch and you can text them or call them if you want and not worry that your bothering them.

Good luck x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don`t get sucked in, its a great site if you treat it with a healthy honest approach.

Your really barking up the wrong tree if you fall for someone on here.............

Your young and free be happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thanks for replies, all advice noted.

The woman who has left verifications is NOT the woman in question."

oh my darling your 22 - i want to reach out and hug you - my youngest son is a year older than you and i cant help but feel for you

move on from this one and seriously think hard about a lot of the good advice you have read on here xxx good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had to tell a young guy that we had to break contact due to the fact that would not leave my hubby no matter how nice he was. We did meet andd it was very nice and kept in contact but had a serious chat and told him it was not what I wanted. End of story is that we had nice time together and it was fun but never went any where.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i sort of know where your coming from with this mate. im in an emotionless relationship and left feeling unattractive and neglected. when i first joined here i was pleased a woman showed attention in me for first time in ages. but mistook attention for something more. i got upset when she then told me she was starting a relationship with someone and felt led on by her. i left the site for a while but it occured to me that i had gone on for friendship AND fun same as she had. the fact she had got into a relationship was a natural course for her. and i realised that i wasnt looking for love with her and vice versa. after all this is a swing site when all is said and done and it was my choice to join in.i admit i first went onto here with my mind blurred because i was missing out on so much on so much in my life. but now i know what i want and know what others want.

i dont need my ego stroking and i dont intend to do it to others. and friendship before anything else is important to me. that way both parties can set their boundaries out first with no complications in the future.

i dont think this woman was open with you in first place and has now left you wondering where you fit in in her life if at all.without sounding patronising your a young lad and it must have been hard for you to tell this to a bunch of strangers but at the end of it all who could you tell? not the woman you liked thats for sure. i found a lot of people were willing to help and advise on here and i think its great you could tell us this.

but only you know what you really want. and i honestly hope you do get that mate cos you seem a good un.

but age has nothing to do with who you should go for. you could find an older single woman never mind one your age. but make sure you know what you both want to start with if you do carry on on this site.

you may think ive talked bollox or you may think this helps. either way best of luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, I believe she is a tease, and is unlikely to commit herself to you or anyone else.

Avoid at all cost IMHO!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Player ... yes women play too

Avoid and move on

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

It comes down to one thing and this should be clear and sorry to point out the obvious. But one phrase tells you everything you should know.

She is married.

If she was single then that is a different situation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Remember you might not be the only one she is saying this too and doing this too.....sounds like she aint happy in her marraige and is using this site to excite herself.

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By *usterMan
over a year ago

worthing

Theres a percentage of people who fantasise and an equal number who understand and feed them. Theres also a lot who don't read other people very well and have no idea what garden path they are being led up..

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks everyone for your advice, all very good advice and all duly noted and i will be letting the woman in question know that we are obviously not for each other and hope we can move on.

Once again thanks everyone, and i mean everyone.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/10/10 23:36:57]

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn


"Thanks everyone for your advice, all very good advice and all duly noted and i will be letting the woman in question know that we are obviously not for each other and hope we can move on.

Once again thanks everyone, and i mean everyone."

Well done you. Nice to see you have realised the reality hunny. Enjoy the site and have fun ok xx

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By *imal75Man
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

You have done the right things mate...

sorry the message is late

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