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"Just smile and say hello. It really is that easy. If they like you they'll chat. If not, move on. " This. We happily chat to people even if it is just polite small talk. It should soon become apparent if there is mutual interest or not. Either way you have nothing to lose. We would probably admire your confidence. Couples may be just as nervous as you to make the first move. Just enjoy yourself. Xx | |||
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"Just smile and say hello. It really is that easy. If they like you they'll chat. If not, move on. This. We happily chat to people even if it is just polite small talk. It should soon become apparent if there is mutual interest or not. Either way you have nothing to lose. We would probably admire your confidence. Couples may be just as nervous as you to make the first move. Just enjoy yourself. Xx" I agree x I am a pretty socialable person x you have nothing to lose by saying hello x | |||
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"After going to clubs in my own... I wonder how couples feel when they are approached by a single fem. I always want to talk to the couples That I want to play with however... Wonder if they would think I was a cocky so n so, for approaching. So what's the best way to approach someone in a club ?" Good on you for approaching. No one can really say your cocky as your after the same as everyone else. This lifestyle could do with more women like you | |||
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"So what's the best way to approach someone in a club ?" Like a sniper, sneak up from behind then when you're within range hurl yourself at them, jump on there back while grabbing them round the neck and then hang on for dear life. | |||
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"When I first visited chams with my wife a single fem chatted to us by complimenting my wife in the basque she was wearing as soon as we git in the club getting changed. In hindsight we didn't play with her but maybe missed the come and get me signs lol" Or perhaps she just liked the basque | |||
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"After going to clubs in my own... I wonder how couples feel when they are approached by a single fem. I always want to talk to the couples That I want to play with however... Wonder if they would think I was a cocky so n so, for approaching. So what's the best way to approach someone in a club ?" Just come over n say hello to us........take it from there. | |||
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"Just smile and say hello. It really is that easy. If they like you they'll chat. If not, move on. " they will possibly have tried to catch your eye anyway if they like you - i get into a different mindset when im in a club - will go up to people and chat - ask the lady if shes bi - i think that this has come after spending a hour or so of us talking to a couple - all the signals of them both wanting to play both ways to find not bi - so now i just ask - not in a pushy manner cos thats rude | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with." thats a shame - xxx Sx | |||
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"We love talking to single women in clubs, and the chats are without strings - there is no problem if the three of us don't proceed to playing - just being sociable is fine. If it does go further even better!" Agree with this 100% - I think I can speak for both of us. Also during our third time at a club, not having swung yet, and venturing into the couples room for the first time, the fem of a couple asked my OH if they could join us. It was a great introduction! To me the fem to fem approach is more gentle and much appreciated. Him | |||
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"So what's the best way to approach someone in a club ? Like a sniper, sneak up from behind then when you're within range hurl yourself at them, jump on there back while grabbing them round the neck and then hang on for dear life." Howling at this! Makes a note... | |||
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"So what's the best way to approach someone in a club ? Like a sniper, sneak up from behind then when you're within range hurl yourself at them, jump on there back while grabbing them round the neck and then hang on for dear life. Howling at this! Makes a note... " hey we would feel wanted for sure if that happened - | |||
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"Would be more than happy for any of the people in this thread to approach and chat to us Hey even if we don't play, a new friend is a new friend, and it would be great to chat with a like minded person who enjoys the same thing C x" | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with." Look for clubs which are giving everyone written on name tags when they go in and then take the name tag off them and make an anagram of their name and stick it back on them | |||
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"Would be more than happy for any of the people in this thread to approach and chat to us Hey even if we don't play, a new friend is a new friend, and it would be great to chat with a like minded person who enjoys the same thing C x" Great attitude. | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with. Look for clubs which are giving everyone written on name tags when they go in and then take the name tag off them and make an anagram of their name and stick it back on them " mmm you always get one don't you Lee lol | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with. Look for clubs which are giving everyone written on name tags when they go in and then take the name tag off them and make an anagram of their name and stick it back on them " or the girl who puts her label on her ass | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with. Look for clubs which are giving everyone written on name tags when they go in and then take the name tag off them and make an anagram of their name and stick it back on them mmm you always get one don't you Lee lol" Who. Me! Jack Daniels is a wonderful thing!! I mean when I'm on my own and not irritating the people I've gone with | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with." I do know what you mean there hun - but it may be worth remembering that not ALL couples you see in clubs are 'real' couples - they could be singles who've met up for the first time to play together at the club - and in that case they may not wish to play with others! I just smile and say hi - engage in converation if they want to - and try to find out what they're hoping to get out of their visit to the club! (Purely social, just playing together, mmf, mff, mmff etc - the possibilities are endless!!) Most people are very friendly to single fems - sorry if you've had bad experiences but please don't let it put you off love! | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with. Look for clubs which are giving everyone written on name tags when they go in and then take the name tag off them and make an anagram of their name and stick it back on them mmm you always get one don't you Lee lol" That you do Chelle | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with. Look for clubs which are giving everyone written on name tags when they go in and then take the name tag off them and make an anagram of their name and stick it back on them mmm you always get one don't you Lee lol Who. Me! Jack Daniels is a wonderful thing!! I mean when I'm on my own and not irritating the people I've gone with " What, by knicking their shoes etc? | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with." I've found the same so although Mr would happily have me go alone to a club I tend to only go with people too. I sometimes feel that single women are not as welcome to other couples as most people would think. | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with. I've found the same so although Mr would happily have me go alone to a club I tend to only go with people too. I sometimes feel that single women are not as welcome to other couples as most people would think. " Exactly | |||
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"Would be more than happy for any of the people in this thread to approach and chat to us Hey even if we don't play, a new friend is a new friend, and it would be great to chat with a like minded person who enjoys the same thing C x" That's a great post | |||
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"Im crap at it yes im gobby but making conversation to strangers im cack at " Same here | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with. Look for clubs which are giving everyone written on name tags when they go in and then take the name tag off them and make an anagram of their name and stick it back on them mmm you always get one don't you Lee lol Who. Me! Jack Daniels is a wonderful thing!! I mean when I'm on my own and not irritating the people I've gone with " may will be me and u and jd | |||
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"Im crap at it yes im gobby but making conversation to strangers im cack at Same here" single men i cant eveb read the signs if they fancy me or not lol | |||
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"Sometimes when i'm in a club because i'm a single guy I don't even look at couples as most of the time all i read is negative posts about single guys. I wouldn't approach a couple " awww most of the time in clubs people know what im like when imin a mischievous mood | |||
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"Sometimes when i'm in a club because i'm a single guy I don't even look at couples as most of the time all i read is negative posts about single guys. I wouldn't approach a couple " In a club we will talk to anyone and have a laugh even if it's not going to go any further, it's approaching people we struggle with | |||
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"Sometimes when i'm in a club because i'm a single guy I don't even look at couples as most of the time all i read is negative posts about single guys. I wouldn't approach a couple " Really? I go as a single guy and never had any problems with couples as long as your not pushy theres nothing wrong with a chat with them, might even get to play if they like you | |||
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"Sometimes when i'm in a club because i'm a single guy I don't even look at couples as most of the time all i read is negative posts about single guys. I wouldn't approach a couple " i don't any motives when i go up and chat to people so i'll say hello and chat to everyone and anyone... if they are rude and don't fancy chatting thats not a me issue.... thats a them problem and whatever preconceived notion they have.... | |||
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"Sometimes when i'm in a club because i'm a single guy I don't even look at couples as most of the time all i read is negative posts about single guys. I wouldn't approach a couple i don't any motives when i go up and chat to people so i'll say hello and chat to everyone and anyone... if they are rude and don't fancy chatting thats not a me issue.... thats a them problem and whatever preconceived notion they have...." Great advice, thanks | |||
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"This is something we really struggle with, some people seem to be able to just go up and chat, we just can't do it, what if they do like us, what if after chatting we don't like them. So we tend to just sort of sit around hoping someone comes and talks to us, clubs are fun but can be hard work, do you talk to people your not interested in to be polite if they talk to you or do you just tried to avoid eye contact? It's a bloody minefield I tell you" mmm when I'm around you never shut up lol. Seriously tho I like to chat to anyone. It doesn't mean I'm after the content of their pants/knickers tho. | |||
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"This is something we really struggle with, some people seem to be able to just go up and chat, we just can't do it, what if they do like us, what if after chatting we don't like them. So we tend to just sort of sit around hoping someone comes and talks to us, clubs are fun but can be hard work, do you talk to people your not interested in to be polite if they talk to you or do you just tried to avoid eye contact? It's a bloody minefield I tell you mmm when I'm around you never shut up lol. Seriously tho I like to chat to anyone. It doesn't mean I'm after the content of their pants/knickers tho. " We are ok with people we know, we are a bit shy you know | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with. Look for clubs which are giving everyone written on name tags when they go in and then take the name tag off them and make an anagram of their name and stick it back on them mmm you always get one don't you Lee lol Who. Me! Jack Daniels is a wonderful thing!! I mean when I'm on my own and not irritating the people I've gone with may will be me and u and jd " Now that sounds like a night I could do | |||
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"I've struggled with this myself and the attitude of some couples (I'm sorry to say mainly the female half) has knocked my confidence to approach and start a social chat. I still struggle to make clubs work for me and although I'd like to go more on my own, I tend to look for others to go with. Look for clubs which are giving everyone written on name tags when they go in and then take the name tag off them and make an anagram of their name and stick it back on them mmm you always get one don't you Lee lol Who. Me! Jack Daniels is a wonderful thing!! I mean when I'm on my own and not irritating the people I've gone with may will be me and u and jd Now that sounds like a night I could do " Yay x | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. " I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx" In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move " Something like 'to let' in writing? | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move Something like 'to let' in writing? " And I still got no offers | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move Something like 'to let' in writing? And I still got no offers " no offers, dont believe you ?!? | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move Something like 'to let' in writing? And I still got no offers " I offered to do your popper back up again, or was that undo it | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move Something like 'to let' in writing? And I still got no offers I offered to do your popper back up again, or was that undo it " I believe I gave you a look. | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move Something like 'to let' in writing? And I still got no offers I offered to do your popper back up again, or was that undo it I believe I gave you a look. " I believe I did take a look | |||
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"People honestly don't come up to us, which sucks, because we never seem to be able to pluck up the courage to go over and talk to people we find hot. I've danced with people randomly before, and got into a conversation that way, and we have some how managed to stumble into conversations before, but we have never had somebody come up to us as such! C x" We would talk to you! | |||
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"People honestly don't come up to us, which sucks, because we never seem to be able to pluck up the courage to go over and talk to people we find hot. I've danced with people randomly before, and got into a conversation that way, and we have some how managed to stumble into conversations before, but we have never had somebody come up to us as such! C x We would talk to you! " We should be so lucky haha! C x | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move Something like 'to let' in writing? And I still got no offers " Ahem...you got plenty but didn't see them. | |||
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"People honestly don't come up to us, which sucks, because we never seem to be able to pluck up the courage to go over and talk to people we find hot. I've danced with people randomly before, and got into a conversation that way, and we have some how managed to stumble into conversations before, but we have never had somebody come up to us as such! C x" Be careful what you wish for. I may well be tempted to push my confidence levels up and come and say if I see you both at phukt!! | |||
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"People honestly don't come up to us, which sucks, because we never seem to be able to pluck up the courage to go over and talk to people we find hot. I've danced with people randomly before, and got into a conversation that way, and we have some how managed to stumble into conversations before, but we have never had somebody come up to us as such! C x Be careful what you wish for. I may well be tempted to push my confidence levels up and come and say if I see you both at phukt!! " C x | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move Something like 'to let' in writing? And I still got no offers Ahem...you got plenty but didn't see them. " This is why I'm not allowed out on my own | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move Something like 'to let' in writing? And I still got no offers Ahem...you got plenty but didn't see them. This is why I'm not allowed out on my own " If I'd of know this last Friday, I'd of told you some of the more obvious signals I could see you were getting lol | |||
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"I've found that people tend to steal my shoes, mess with my name tag and generally pick on me when I go to clubs. Well the first time I went anyway. But I'm terrible at reading signals and giving them so goodness knows what advice I can give. I don't think i would be busy with your shoes if we were chatting! C xx In all fairness I was blind to all advances. I'm a numpty and probably need something in writing for me to make a move Something like 'to let' in writing? And I still got no offers Ahem...you got plenty but didn't see them. This is why I'm not allowed out on my own If I'd of know this last Friday, I'd of told you some of the more obvious signals I could see you were getting lol " Really? Crikey. | |||
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"its's an interesting question and mindset set in that is talking to people in clubs a means to an end..... or is it an end to a means.... and i think that says a lot about the mindset of people because if i got the feeling that people thought i was talking to people at the beginning because i wanted to get into their pants... i don't think i would talk to people as much!!! and thats what we are almost scaring people into doing.... what happened to chatting just for the sake of chatting and no motives behind it...." I can see where you are coming from and we do chat just to chat. But if you went up to a girl or guy in a bar, it would normally be accepted that if it was a stranger you are showing some kind of interest. I tend to chat on here just for the sake of chatting, if we were at a social then we would be chatting for the sake of chatting, but a swingers club does have an element of being a place to pick up other couples and/or singles. So there will be an element of 'being on the pull'. Otherwise why not just head out to a local bar?? We would not go to a swingers club and pay the fee's just to pop out for a drink and socialise as there are other, (closer, cheaper, less sexualized) places to just chat. | |||
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