FabSwingers.com forum: "Distant" people?

By *razedcat OP Man
over a year ago

London / Herts

Do any of you guys encounter people that, when you try chatting to them, seem to have this massive barrier in place? Even though the dialogue continues for a while (days or weeks even) the conversations are static, the responses short and choppy, very little information passed.

Do other people swing like this? Is this a common phenomenon on here?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No if its not happening its thanks and byebye.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yer I get this a lot!

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

"Do any of you guys encounter people that, when you try chatting to them, seem to have this massive barrier in place? Even though the dialogue continues for a while (days or weeks even) the conversations are static, the responses short and choppy, very little information passed.

Do other people swing like this? Is this a common phenomenon on here? "

It's because they are juggling a lot of eggs mate.

They are replying as they are interested, though not giving you enough to go on to continue and conversation.

It takes a lot of effort to engage with people and remembering what each have said is quite difficult. It does put you off, and eventually they will settle for someone else anyway - usually a last minute meet they post that same night.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

*continue any

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Yes we bring the conversation to an end

if it seems to be going that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes. We cancelled a planned meet with a guy because there was little more than one sentence in any email reply. We thought if he was like this in email then it might be awkward face to face. People have to put some effort in before a meet and the guys who are more successful seem to try a bit harder in email conversations. Only our opinion though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes if I'm brain tired and can't think I have to excuse myself. If the conversation isn't flowing it's dead on the ground for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sometimes if I'm brain tired and can't think I have to excuse myself. If the conversation isn't flowing it's dead on the ground for me "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes. We cancelled a planned meet with a guy because there was little more than one sentence in any email reply. We thought if he was like this in email then it might be awkward face to face. People have to put some effort in before a meet and the guys who are more successful seem to try a bit harder in email conversations. Only our opinion though."

hi.cock pic sent.anal?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

to be honest..I think its the mobile phone..people dont sit down using fab..so probably just cant really be arsed thinking/responding to 'personalities' while multitasking.

keyboard warriors unite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we tried open / honest approach which is only way we know and got time wasted and confused as to what we should be saying now and no idea what to say..so hardly ever mail or solicit anyone these days.

But the forums are good still.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do other people swing like this? Is this a common phenomenon on here?

It's because they are juggling a lot of eggs mate.

They are replying as they are interested, though not giving you enough to go on to continue and conversation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do other people swing like this? Is this a common phenomenon on here? "

We don't tend to continue to interact with people whose messages are like this...while we don't really "chat" on here, we see messages like this as an indicator of one of two things...either they're not really interested so we move on or they're unlikely to be much more interesting face to face, so we move on...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or maybe they are too polite to just say no...not for us. Or to just delete and block...the path that many take, which isn't rude but cuts down on inane twittering that is going nowhere.

Read between the lines, take the hint.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well we are probably one of the guilty couple who sometimes dont appear interested but its usually for a reason.

A guy mails us asking to meet initially he appears ok so we chat.

However it soon becomes apparent all he wants to do is have dirty chat and asks for pics at every opportunity and probably having a wank at same time if hes doing this our chats become less informative until we stop or block

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do other people swing like this? Is this a common phenomenon on here?

It's because they are juggling a lot of eggs mate.

They are replying as they are interested, though not giving you enough to go on to continue and conversation.

Unfortunately this was me sometimes!! Obviously it is insisted upon that we answer every message even if its a no thank you. In the beginning I'd get about 3 messages a min so the people I actually wanted to speak to would only get short sentence answers so I could keep up. Along with that I only use my phone so it takes ages to type and it'd be hard to remember what I said to whom so the brevity of the message reflected that. If however, the person was interesting, giving lots of information, humorous and asking more than generic questions, they got my full attention (I probably only had about 10 guys in 3 years that can hold a proper conversation).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Or maybe they are too polite to just say no...not for us. Or to just delete and block...the path that many take, which isn't rude but cuts down on inane twittering that is going nowhere.

Read between the lines, take the hint."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well we are probably one of the guilty couple who sometimes dont appear interested but its usually for a reason.

A guy mails us asking to meet initially he appears ok so we chat.

I totally agree. Had it the other day seemed nice in first two, third he started talking about can't wait to get me into bed, I was like...whoa who mentioned anything about that, my profile clearly stated no dirty talk only play after meeting if there's chemistry. Giving him the benefit of the doubt I continued telling him I was busy hence the short answers. He continued to assume my response meant an sure fuck so I told him I didn't wanna take it further.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I also go cold when the sex talk starts. I have been having a simple chat about life in general and then get told I'm turning him on and he's getting hard. I excuse myself and tell him to enjoy it. That happens quite frequently and is brain numbing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also it depends on the things you say to people yourself that dictates the resplse you get. If your getting a lot of rude replies id have to question your choice of conversation.

We get mails from guys which as an opener state send your slut around to mine ill fuck her and fill her up and send her home to you.

Now this kind mail deserves a rude response A) hes assuming Bev is a slut which she isnt B) he assumes i tell her where and when she has to visit which i def do not so its for these examples guys will get nothing other than a rude terse reply

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I also go cold when the sex talk starts. I have been having a simple chat about life in general and then get told I'm turning him on and he's getting hard. I excuse myself and tell him to enjoy it. That happens quite frequently and is brain numbing "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha glad its not just me.... I get comments like "this is a sex site love, of a dating site, grow up"!! I am definitely not looking for a partner, but also will not just jump into bed with them coz they said hi and sent me a pic of their cock, there has to be some kind of attraction whether that's physical or mental, preferably both.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't lead people on. If they live miles away then say that it's too far to meet but stay open to chat. Because it's a small world.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"to be honest..I think its the mobile phone..people dont sit down using fab..so probably just cant really be arsed thinking/responding to 'personalities' while multitasking.

keyboard warriors unite "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I haven't meet them yet and they start sex chat that's it for me, game over.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I haven't meet them yet and they start sex chat that's it for me, game over. "

Me too. Can't stand the 'ooo I'm gonna do this to you. That to you' Bollocks - cos it ain't happening!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Or maybe they are too polite to just say no...not for us. Or to just delete and block...the path that many take, which isn't rude but cuts down on inane twittering that is going nowhere.

Read between the lines, take the hint."

Yep

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

I've changed my mind a little on this subject recently. Normally if I'm not getting a feeling for someone then I lose interest. I did meet someone who was a little lacking in the conversation department,one line answers,never asking you any questions etc however when I met him he was totally the opposite and much more chatty. So now I'm not quite so quick to click the delete button...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have to admit that I've become distant with men on here sometimes

There's only so much idle chit chat I can take. If they've contacted without sending a picture and continue to just chat and show no interest in meeting or even expecting me to make the first move, then I lose interest.

Might sound a bit hypocritical as I state on my profile that I'm a chatterbox but I am here to meet men at the end of the day and not just chat about nothing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have to admit that I've become distant with men on here sometimes

Might sound a bit hypocritical as I state on my profile that I'm a chatterbox but I am here to meet men at the end of the day and not just chat about nothing. "

. this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had this experience with white label dating, I started asking them questions like what is eleven and 6 and mixing up numbers. the replies were few and it only kicked in when I put in a key word such as blow or shaved. It did not take me long to Sus out these were computer generated accounts and after two weeks wrangling and a threat to report them to office of fair trading, I got my money back, hence reluctance to post too much and pay in advance for membership

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd say they are too polite to say they aren't interested x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do other people swing like this? Is this a common phenomenon on here? "

We get that a lot. Really off putting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do this, but usually in response to what was sent i.e. a message along the lines of how are you? good weekend? up to much?

will get a response of fine, yes, yes....unless I have been chatting with the person a while.

I'm worse when I'm tired and grumpy and only really want to engage with regulars or if i'm trying to clear my inbox before bed. But then, I am like it in real life too, until I know you or if I have a grump on I don't talk much, unless you get me started on something I'm passionate about-then I don't shut up!

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

If we get messages like that it is usually a sign that they are not serious. We also assume that if we were to meet the conversation would not exactly be riveting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No if its not happening its thanks and byebye. "

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By *r jblMan
over a year ago

from parts unknown

"Yer I get this a lot!"
.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

lol me to, take for today for example. I was asking for some fun for the weekend with a long sentence and her reply was just "hey" then I replied then nothing, I thought they are not serious so I moved on to the next profile in line

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