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"I personally, as someone who has been active on the scene for all of their adult life, find the snobbery towards '50SOG newbies' quite appalling." | |||
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"50 shades is an appalling written book and I'm enough of a literatury snob to loathe it for that readon alone! Bit if it introducea people to kink that want to explore and increase their knowledge then that is in noway a bad thing. But from what ive been told it also reinforces negative stereotypes in so.much as the Dom is 'damaged' and the relationship is unhealthy. Equally some of the play is hardly safe. I like to think that the fet scene is inclusive and welcoming. I couldn't cate less how people get in to it. I'm not in sneering and looking down at people. But equally I have no real time for dimdoms who apoear on the scene and think they know it all. " I am not a literary snob and I really enjoyed the trilogy. I didn't find that it reinforced negative stereotypes. It told a story of a quite lovely, but emotionally damaged, man who enjoyed kink relationships. There isn't anything unsafe that I recall. I think they do some anal, some bondage and some spanking. I'd have to read it again to make sure though | |||
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" Instead of discussing if the themes of this book are anti feminist/true bdsm/soft porn etc etc...people should be discussing how in the fucking world did this level of writing even get published! ! The English in it wouldn't even get a C at GCSE...It is literally the most horrendous and shocking book I have ever read..I am still open mouthed that anyone published it and I make my own judgements about people who like it and refer to it! " I still really like it... I enjoyed it as a quick read with an easy difficulty level. The way I see it, it's a bit like food. I love fine dining. I love Michelin starred restaurants. I can also cook very good food at home, easily to gastropub quality - and I live with a chef too. But sometimes, I just really want to get a portion of chips from the local chippy. Books are the same. I don't always want to read a classic. And sometimes I just want some easy reading porn. | |||
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" Instead of discussing if the themes of this book are anti feminist/true bdsm/soft porn etc etc...people should be discussing how in the fucking world did this level of writing even get published! ! The English in it wouldn't even get a C at GCSE...It is literally the most horrendous and shocking book I have ever read..I am still open mouthed that anyone published it and I make my own judgements about people who like it and refer to it! " it was originaly written as a story for a twighlight saga fan page nuff said realy | |||
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"It's common for guys to watch the current trend for rough porn and think "oh I'll have some of that" then calls themselves a Dom, yes." Or worse start calling themselves Masters | |||
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"I personally, as someone who has been active on the scene for all of their adult life, find the snobbery towards '50SOG newbies' quite appalling." I would agree though not appalling just small minded and and intolerant. | |||
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"It's common for guys to watch the current trend for rough porn and think "oh I'll have some of that" then calls themselves a Dom, yes. Or worse start calling themselves Masters" Why's that a bad thing? People can call themselves whatever they want and then their partners can decide if they want to roleplay along with them. | |||
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"It's common for guys to watch the current trend for rough porn and think "oh I'll have some of that" then calls themselves a Dom, yes. Or worse start calling themselves Masters Why's that a bad thing? People can call themselves whatever they want and then their partners can decide if they want to roleplay along with them." I have no clue what way you guys do it across the water but the title of Master is honorific and earned after many years in the bdsm community here. To go calling yourself a Master from the outset demeans the title. What one person calls the other in a relationship is between them. What I'm saying is the title being used public by people undeserving of it | |||
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" I have no clue what way you guys do it across the water but the title of Master is honorific and earned after many years in the bdsm community here. To go calling yourself a Master from the outset demeans the title. What one person calls the other in a relationship is between them. What I'm saying is the title being used public by people undeserving of it " Thankfully in most of the UK scene nobody judges if you deserve a title that you think is hot. | |||
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" I have no clue what way you guys do it across the water but the title of Master is honorific and earned after many years in the bdsm community here. To go calling yourself a Master from the outset demeans the title. What one person calls the other in a relationship is between them. What I'm saying is the title being used public by people undeserving of it Thankfully in most of the UK scene nobody judges if you deserve a title that you think is hot." Bollocks. Everyone who has even a slight understanding of the scene, knows and apreciates the significance of title and roles. Whether someone gives time of day to it behind closed doors is another matter, but there is no such support for assumed titles at all. | |||
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" I have no clue what way you guys do it across the water but the title of Master is honorific and earned after many years in the bdsm community here. To go calling yourself a Master from the outset demeans the title. What one person calls the other in a relationship is between them. What I'm saying is the title being used public by people undeserving of it Thankfully in most of the UK scene nobody judges if you deserve a title that you think is hot. Bollocks. Everyone who has even a slight understanding of the scene, knows and apreciates the significance of title and roles. Whether someone gives time of day to it behind closed doors is another matter, but there is no such support for assumed titles at all." You think? | |||
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" Instead of discussing if the themes of this book are anti feminist/true bdsm/soft porn etc etc...people should be discussing how in the fucking world did this level of writing even get published! ! The English in it wouldn't even get a C at GCSE...It is literally the most horrendous and shocking book I have ever read..I am still open mouthed that anyone published it and I make my own judgements about people who like it and refer to it! I still really like it... I enjoyed it as a quick read with an easy difficulty level. The way I see it, it's a bit like food. I love fine dining. I love Michelin starred restaurants. I can also cook very good food at home, easily to gastropub quality - and I live with a chef too. But sometimes, I just really want to get a portion of chips from the local chippy. Books are the same. I don't always want to read a classic. And sometimes I just want some easy reading porn." I really agree with this. I love reading, wide and varied,and it was after much dallying I finally bought these,more to see what the fuss was, than anything else. I enjoyed them as pick up put down books. Yes, storyline and writing style were far from great but it was a quick breezy read to unwind with. I think it's helped to widen the view that women can like whatever they wish and perhaps helped normalise it somewhat from the general stereotypes. | |||
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" Bollocks. Everyone who has even a slight understanding of the scene, knows and apreciates the significance of title and roles. Whether someone gives time of day to it behind closed doors is another matter, but there is no such support for assumed titles at all." I'd agree with you if you were talking specifically about those who are old school or in the leather scene, but most people are not. Most people are just enjoying themselves and things like being awarded titles just don't come into it. Hell, even some of the old school guys that I play with (with 40+ years 'out' on the scene, many of them actively politically campaigning) don't even care what you call yourself. Because at the end of the day it's about doing what makes you feel good, not about fulfilling some old guys idea of what kink should be. | |||
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"I was collared in my past, the relationship fell apart as my master broke a fundamental rule of our relationship. However I do not regret the time I spent with him. Is it becoming more common or just more accepted to say you are in a dom/sub, an do experienced people think the new 50 shades lot are plastic 'scene'. Discuss." 'Fifty Shades of Grey', and it's sequels and spin-offs is, to be brutally honest, a complete pile of s*ite, other views may be valid. The writing is appalling and it fails, completely, in defining the relationship between the submissiive and the Top. Seriously, do not waste your money on this, and anybody that believes that this is how a DS relationship functions needs their head examining. Please feel free to contact me if you require a vivisection of the content. I might have attended the premiere of the film, to hurl eggs at the authoress, and cast, but it would be too much effort, and complete waste of time. I suggest that you burn the bloo*y books. DN | |||
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"I was collared in my past, the relationship fell apart as my master broke a fundamental rule of our relationship. However I do not regret the time I spent with him. Is it becoming more common or just more accepted to say you are in a dom/sub, an do experienced people think the new 50 shades lot are plastic 'scene'. Discuss. 'Fifty Shades of Grey', and it's sequels and spin-offs is, to be brutally honest, a complete pile of s*ite, other views may be valid. The writing is appalling and it fails, completely, in defining the relationship between the submissiive and the Top. Seriously, do not waste your money on this, and anybody that believes that this is how a DS relationship functions needs their head examining. Please feel free to contact me if you require a vivisection of the content. I might have attended the premiere of the film, to hurl eggs at the authoress, and cast, but it would be too much effort, and complete waste of time. I suggest that you burn the bloo*y books. DN " Childish. | |||
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"I was collared in my past, the relationship fell apart as my master broke a fundamental rule of our relationship. However I do not regret the time I spent with him. Is it becoming more common or just more accepted to say you are in a dom/sub, an do experienced people think the new 50 shades lot are plastic 'scene'. Discuss." I read the books as a few people I knew were reading them and, whilst I'd never claim to be an expert, there were a few things they questioned that I felt I could answer better if I knew the context... Plus I was curious to see if the books were as good as they raved about. Personally I thought they were poorly written, dull and very exaggerated & unrealistic, but I'm glad they have got people taking a bit more openly about sex and actually reading too! I'm not sure if the D/s dynamic is more accepted though as many still have negative impressions of people using it to over power or bully, as the recent porn bans have shown. Many don't seem to understand that some of us enjoy a spanking every now and then, and that being Dom doesn't require aggression or a damaged person... At no point do I remember 50 Shades referring to 'Safe, Sane & Consensual' or anything similar, but I could be wrong as I didn't find them that memorable | |||
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"Forgetting the literary fuck ups it gives people the totally wrong idea about what a healthy D/s relationship should be. He stalks her, he ignores her safe word, he spanks the fuck out of her on her first time out and then leaves her without aftercare. He is sexually violent (not in the good way) he is jealous and possesive and disrespects her in front of other people. I dont see anything wrong with new people being introduced by the books as long as they do their research and realise it isnt like it is in the book. It really SHOULDNT be like it is on the book" | |||
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" I dont see anything wrong with new people being introduced by the books as long as they do their research and realise it isnt like it is in the book. It really SHOULDNT be like it is on the book" Unless you're into those things, of course. | |||
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"I'd love to be a dom but no idea how to go about it lol" 1. Find person who is submissive. 2. See if you both click. 3. Exchange ideas and try them out. 4. Repeat point 3. | |||
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"I'd like to thank the OP for the thread. I have had the books for a while but I'm unsure whether to start them. I don't know if this thread is going to help or not in that but it has made me think about this scene/dynamic once again. It is a path I feel perhaps I might be getting drawn too. I've had an interesting weekend. I do have a few questions. I don't want the OP to reveal what happened in the previous relationship but perhaps someone could explain what potential fundamental rules might have been broken? Forgive me for such naivety. One thing that occurs to me might have happened is not respecting the safe word. I was thinking about this. I have heard that in a sub dom relationship in some ways it is the sub that has the power, which seems counter intuitive until you really think about it. What occurs to me about the safe word is that this is actually protection for the dom, which is the opposite of what I did think. Am I right? One last point about the book, surely this is fantasy so not meant to reflect what actually happens in a real life sub/dom relationship but fantasy? I am certain being raped would be a terrifying and traumatic experience that I would not want to actually experience and yet the fantasy persists in my head sometimes. I would not want to read a fictional book where there was merely a pretend rape. It would lack the narrative power. Or am I wrong? I hope I haven't broken any site rules writing this. " Good points about fantasy and fiction vs reality. | |||
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"I'd love to be a dom but no idea how to go about it lol 1. Find person who is submissive. 2. See if you both click. 3. Exchange ideas and try them out. 4. Repeat point 3." i think you missed a bullet point there. 'research before play' sorta saves trips to A+E an yes the books have made the scene more acceptable, but its introduced people into a scene where they can be terrified and shocked. we both work at BDSM play clubs as crew and DM's (dungeon monitors) we see the 'fifty shaders' turn up totally new with their Tesco £1.99 crops and cheap pvc gear. they stay on average about 6 mins then run ... yes run to their cars. yes its opened the scene up, but too many are not researching what they are embarking on. we have seen blows to kidneys, attempted rope play without having cutters nearby (we carry safety equipment when on duty) wax play without checking the melting point of the candle. if they are trying this stuff out in a club without research god knows what they are trying at home and how many will have injured themselves (and not in a good subspacey way) once the film is released (if it survives the new anti porn laws) there will no doubt be an influx of new victims and psudo masters hitting the scene. ok for the predators (yes there are predators in every scene) there will be a nice line of impressionable young things for them to play with, no doubt the hospitals will see more sex related injuries, and possibly the government will act with some draconian tightening of the law. so we wait with bated breath for February and see what it brings.... | |||
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" i think you missed a bullet point there. 'research before play' sorta saves trips to A+E " I personally only play with people that have enough common sense not to do stupid stuff. And if I followed what people say you shouldn't do on the internet, I wouldn't do half the 'dangerous' things that I do (and enjoy) now. I think you can mostly cover things with: - If you cut someone they might bleed. - If you hit someone they might break. - If you stop someone breathing they might die. - If you do things to someone that they don't agree to (outside of consensual non-consent) then you might go to prison. Common sense trumps research on the internet for most things. | |||
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" i think you missed a bullet point there. 'research before play' sorta saves trips to A+E I personally only play with people that have enough common sense not to do stupid stuff. And if I followed what people say you shouldn't do on the internet, I wouldn't do half the 'dangerous' things that I do (and enjoy) now. I think you can mostly cover things with: - If you cut someone they might bleed. - If you hit someone they might break. - If you stop someone breathing they might die. - If you do things to someone that they don't agree to (outside of consensual non-consent) then you might go to prison. Common sense trumps research on the internet for most things." you are assuming they have common sense in the first place | |||
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" i think you missed a bullet point there. 'research before play' sorta saves trips to A+E I personally only play with people that have enough common sense not to do stupid stuff. And if I followed what people say you shouldn't do on the internet, I wouldn't do half the 'dangerous' things that I do (and enjoy) now. I think you can mostly cover things with: - If you cut someone they might bleed. - If you hit someone they might break. - If you stop someone breathing they might die. - If you do things to someone that they don't agree to (outside of consensual non-consent) then you might go to prison. Common sense trumps research on the internet for most things. you are assuming they have common sense in the first place " And the sensory acuity to realise what they are doing and not performing from their own head. | |||
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" i think you missed a bullet point there. 'research before play' sorta saves trips to A+E I personally only play with people that have enough common sense not to do stupid stuff. And if I followed what people say you shouldn't do on the internet, I wouldn't do half the 'dangerous' things that I do (and enjoy) now. I think you can mostly cover things with: - If you cut someone they might bleed. - If you hit someone they might break. - If you stop someone breathing they might die. - If you do things to someone that they don't agree to (outside of consensual non-consent) then you might go to prison. Common sense trumps research on the internet for most things." And yet you say nobody gives any credence to titles of Master? That just does not make sense. | |||
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" Instead of discussing if the themes of this book are anti feminist/true bdsm/soft porn etc etc...people should be discussing how in the fucking world did this level of writing even get published! ! The English in it wouldn't even get a C at GCSE...It is literally the most horrendous and shocking book I have ever read..I am still open mouthed that anyone published it and I make my own judgements about people who like it and refer to it! " I never read it and never will. Don't read mummy books | |||
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" you are assuming they have common sense in the first place " We can only hope that all the people without any common sense date all the other people without common sense and they end up winning the darwin awards... | |||
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"a Dom needs to have complete knowledge of his/her role, to allow someone else to submit to them fully. most of the true subs I know are completely different in their day to day life and usually have controlling job roles etc " Most of the people who are the submissive party in a TPE relationship don't have controlling job roles. In fact most of the submissive sI know don't have controlling job roles. That might be because I tend to socialise with quite creative or technical people, where they don't generally go into management type roles. That possibly says more about your own friendship group. But what I really want to know is - where do I find the curriculum and exam to be a 'true' sub or a 'true' dom? | |||
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" Most of the people who are the submissive party..." Should have been "Most of the people *I know* who are the..." | |||
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"Very much so, books like 50 Shads Of Grey etc don't help the cause though, it gives most people a little insight to it which they don't really understand " I'm a little lost with what the "cause" is? As for labels, to me, they create a 'one size fits all' association, where as in any walks of life there are spectrums and different hues. Again to me, non are wrong or right, they are what they are. As for opening up insights, surely that is better then a closed mind. | |||
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"a Dom needs to have complete knowledge of his/her role, to allow someone else to submit to them fully. most of the true subs I know are completely different in their day to day life and usually have controlling job roles etc Most of the people who are the submissive party in a TPE relationship don't have controlling job roles. In fact most of the submissive sI know don't have controlling job roles. That might be because I tend to socialise with quite creative or technical people, where they don't generally go into management type roles. That possibly says more about your own friendship group. But what I really want to know is - where do I find the curriculum and exam to be a 'true' sub or a 'true' dom?" That's odd, because I have found it the other way and it is a release from that world. The biggest sexually submissive person I knew was, by reputation, an aggressive barrister. | |||
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" Most of the people who are the submissive party... Should have been "Most of the people *I know* who are the..."" Whereas, most of the people I know who are submissive DO have controlling jobs | |||
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" That's odd, because I have found it the other way and it is a release from that world. The biggest sexually submissive person I knew was, by reputation, an aggressive barrister. " Most of the people I know in TPE relationships often take it to the extent where the submissive partner is a home-maker or they have a part time business that is work from home or similar. I have met over the years a fair few men who enjoy bottoming as a release from their day to day hectic work lives, but I'd never suggest they were my submissive in a million years. We just played together. If they define themselves as submissive is none of my business. However I do have my own collared submissive and he is wonderful. He's a project manager - no high power or stressful job for him I'm afraid. He's also kind and compassionate, not an aggressive bone in his body. Like I said, things like that are probably more reflective of your social circle than anything more than that. The bias of self selection is always present. Clubs can have this effect too. I found Pedestal to be rather full of businessmen with stressful jobs, but the Birmingham femdom clubs less so. Almost certainly because at Pedestal in London there will be a far higher ratio of men in high powered jobs locally due to it being the financial centre of the UK. | |||
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" Most of the people who are the submissive party in a TPE relationship don't have controlling job roles. In fact most of the submissive sI know don't have controlling job roles. That might be because I tend to socialise with quite creative or technical people, where they don't generally go into management type roles. That possibly says more about your own friendship group. " Most of the women I have had d/s play/relationships with, have jobs that are in management, are senior in their positions or are extremely high up the corporate ladder. Women that have to tell people what to do or make decisions that affect large groups within organisational structures. You are making absolute generalisations here - I am not arguing with you just, you are steam-rollering your ideas which are incorrect. I am struggling to think of one single woman who has not held a position of authority when I have played D/S. | |||
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" Most of the women I have had d/s play/relationships with, have jobs that are in management, are senior in their positions or are extremely high up the corporate ladder. Women that have to tell people what to do or make decisions that affect large groups within organisational structures. You are making absolute generalisations here - I am not arguing with you just, you are steam-rollering your ideas which are incorrect. I am struggling to think of one single woman who has not held a position of authority when I have played D/S. " Maybe it depends on your age as much as anything else. Most of my previous submissive partners have been under 30. How many people under 30 hold controlling jobs? Certainly as a femsub myself, I have never held a controlling job. | |||
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" Most of the women I have had d/s play/relationships with, have jobs that are in management, are senior in their positions or are extremely high up the corporate ladder. Women that have to tell people what to do or make decisions that affect large groups within organisational structures. You are making absolute generalisations here - I am not arguing with you just, you are steam-rollering your ideas which are incorrect. I am struggling to think of one single woman who has not held a position of authority when I have played D/S. Maybe it depends on your age as much as anything else. Most of my previous submissive partners have been under 30. How many people under 30 hold controlling jobs? Certainly as a femsub myself, I have never held a controlling job." Indeed I was into d/s before I ever had a job... and many people are the same nowadays. So I loathe to say that job has any correlation with what kind of sexy fun you enjoy. | |||
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" That's odd, because I have found it the other way and it is a release from that world. The biggest sexually submissive person I knew was, by reputation, an aggressive barrister. Most of the people I know in TPE relationships often take it to the extent where the submissive partner is a home-maker or they have a part time business that is work from home or similar. I have met over the years a fair few men who enjoy bottoming as a release from their day to day hectic work lives, but I'd never suggest they were my submissive in a million years. We just played together. If they define themselves as submissive is none of my business. However I do have my own collared submissive and he is wonderful. He's a project manager - no high power or stressful job for him I'm afraid. He's also kind and compassionate, not an aggressive bone in his body. Like I said, things like that are probably more reflective of your social circle than anything more than that. The bias of self selection is always present. Clubs can have this effect too. I found Pedestal to be rather full of businessmen with stressful jobs, but the Birmingham femdom clubs less so. Almost certainly because at Pedestal in London there will be a far higher ratio of men in high powered jobs locally due to it being the financial centre of the UK." Bias of self-selection, doesn't sit well with me, too cognitive. Kipling's, Or walk with kings - nor loose the common touch, comes to mind. To me, it spans all Memetic values. | |||
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"I'm intrugued by the idea of a dom/sub relationship and would be interested in exploring it further. However the guy would need to be not only very good looking with a great body, well endowed and physically stronger than me - he'd have to be very intelligent and emotionally strong too in order to dominate my mind as well as my body - and also a really nice guy rather than a bully using the dom title as an excuse to abuse me. Ok so I know it's a big ask - but if anyone who fits the bill and is interested in me reads this - well helloooo sir!! " He he, I'm sure you'll have lots of response to this - have fun. | |||
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" Maybe it depends on your age as much as anything else. Most of my previous submissive partners have been under 30. How many people under 30 hold controlling jobs? Certainly as a femsub myself, I have never held a controlling job." I think you are over thinking things. | |||
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" If you do things to someone that they don't agree to (outside of consensual non-consent) then you might go to prison. " How do you consent to non-consent? | |||
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" If you do things to someone that they don't agree to (outside of consensual non-consent) then you might go to prison. How do you consent to non-consent?" Even if I say no just do it. | |||
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" you are assuming they have common sense in the first place We can only hope that all the people without any common sense date all the other people without common sense and they end up winning the darwin awards..." | |||
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" If you do things to someone that they don't agree to (outside of consensual non-consent) then you might go to prison. How do you consent to non-consent?" its a nice way of saying play rape or abduction scene they consent in advance and on the set day / time they get fucked or dragged off the street by balaclava wearing guys bundled into a van and played with ... several people we know have had this scene played out for them | |||
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" you are assuming they have common sense in the first place We can only hope that all the people without any common sense date all the other people without common sense and they end up winning the darwin awards... " Is that from a acheology perspective | |||
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"50 shades is an appalling written book and I'm enough of a literatury snob to loathe it for that readon alone! " I50SOG bashing is just too easy a bandwagon to jump on IMHO. Granted it isn't the best written piece ever but for what it was conceived as, and I think many either don't know or forget, then it's excellent. It's origins are as fan fiction, based on the twilight trilogy and was only meant to be shared on a fan fiction site. Sex scenes are a bit samey after a while but for those that know twilight then it's actually very clever. | |||
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"50 shades is an appalling written book and I'm enough of a literatury snob to loathe it for that readon alone! I50SOG bashing is just too easy a bandwagon to jump on IMHO. Granted it isn't the best written piece ever but for what it was conceived as, and I think many either don't know or forget, then it's excellent. It's origins are as fan fiction, based on the twilight trilogy and was only meant to be shared on a fan fiction site. Sex scenes are a bit samey after a while but for those that know twilight then it's actually very clever. " Clever, I struggle with a little, from my perspective. Made a few people think about domestic relationships, is that all bad? | |||
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" If you do things to someone that they don't agree to (outside of consensual non-consent) then you might go to prison. How do you consent to non-consent? its a nice way of saying play rape or abduction scene they consent in advance and on the set day / time they get fucked or dragged off the street by balaclava wearing guys bundled into a van and played with ... several people we know have had this scene played out for them" Interesting interpretation, though not what I had been led to believe it meant. But running with what you said, if the "played with" involved things that the "victim" thought went too far, what is to stop them going to the police and claiming assault or rape? How would the "attackers" prove consent? | |||
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" Instead of discussing if the themes of this book are anti feminist/true bdsm/soft porn etc etc...people should be discussing how in the fucking world did this level of writing even get published! ! The English in it wouldn't even get a C at GCSE...It is literally the most horrendous and shocking book I have ever read..I am still open mouthed that anyone published it and I make my own judgements about people who like it and refer to it! " | |||
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"In all honesty I think its a bit shallow to judge someone on what book they read or any other media. Its not how you get into something its more to do with how much you get out of something and its a bit harsh to piss on someone's parade in an elitist manner." But they are perfect and elite. | |||
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"In all honesty I think its a bit shallow to judge someone on what book they read or any other media. Its not how you get into something its more to do with how much you get out of something and its a bit harsh to piss on someone's parade in an elitist manner. But they are perfect and elite. " But don't you have to be perfect and elite to make that call Me, I'll have to take your word on it | |||
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" If you do things to someone that they don't agree to (outside of consensual non-consent) then you might go to prison. How do you consent to non-consent? its a nice way of saying play rape or abduction scene they consent in advance and on the set day / time they get fucked or dragged off the street by balaclava wearing guys bundled into a van and played with ... several people we know have had this scene played out for them Interesting interpretation, though not what I had been led to believe it meant. But running with what you said, if the "played with" involved things that the "victim" thought went too far, what is to stop them going to the police and claiming assault or rape? How would the "attackers" prove consent?" probably the month long negotiation and emails back n forth plus most of the people we know were very happy with the outcome but its all in the planning the abductions and scenes are normally asked for by the 'victim', she normally sets one friend to 'make it happen' he or she makes sure that all limits are adhered to blood tests are obtained or condoms worn etc. the 'victim' is told a day but not a time or place. A safe word is set plus the advocate is there to make sure everything is done right. normally these are friends off the 'victim' who take part. this adds to the ongoing head fuck of the 'victim' not knowing who took part | |||
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"In all honesty I think its a bit shallow to judge someone on what book they read or any other media. Its not how you get into something its more to do with how much you get out of something and its a bit harsh to piss on someone's parade in an elitist manner. But they are perfect and elite. But don't you have to be perfect and elite to make that call Me, I'll have to take your word on it " I'm out then. I know fuck all. | |||
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"In all honesty I think its a bit shallow to judge someone on what book they read or any other media. Its not how you get into something its more to do with how much you get out of something and its a bit harsh to piss on someone's parade in an elitist manner. But they are perfect and elite. But don't you have to be perfect and elite to make that call Me, I'll have to take your word on it I'm out then. I know fuck all. " | |||
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