FabSwingers.com forum: Teenager discovered you were on fab

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi my 16 year old daughter discovered I'm on fab because I didn't delete my history when I used her mac book. All he'll broke loose now banned from using it shed changed password. What advice would you give this happened 6 weeks ago and we haven't discussed it again since for obvious reasons....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cover your tracks better?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your a grown woman, it's your choice, leave him to come to you with bringing it up in conversation, he is probably more mortified than you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suppose she is only getting used to her own sexuality and to find out mum has what is perceived as an alternate view, well maybe she just lashed out because she didnt understand x

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By *atelotmanMan
over a year ago

Chatham

I had something along the same times happen to me but all worked out now,give her time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't comprehend the level of awkwardness.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't understand why you would browse Fab on your childs mac in the first place tbh

Surely you could have waited til ur own pc or laptop or phone was available ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can't understand why you would browse Fab on your childs mac in the first place tbh

Surely you could have waited til ur own pc or laptop or phone was available ?"

I was wondering the same thing. Im all for safeguarding children and would never do anything in front of my daughter with anyone or use any of her devises for over 18 sites. No matter what age the child is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 07/11/14 01:44:36]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can't understand why you would browse Fab on your childs mac in the first place tbh

Surely you could have waited til ur own pc or laptop or phone was available ?"

Have to admit that was my first thought too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I usually go on my mobile but I had lost it so I used her mac book but I usually delete history she is 16 and it's her macbook. My own fault it's ok now.

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By *rettyLittleThingWoman
over a year ago

Swansea

"Can't understand why you would browse Fab on your childs mac in the first place tbh

Surely you could have waited til ur own pc or laptop or phone was available ?

All of this in one

, Words fail me right now.. Just why on earth would you use her Mac book?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can't understand why you would browse Fab on your childs mac in the first place tbh

Surely you could have waited til ur own pc or laptop or phone was available ?

Have to admit that was my first thought too.

I lost my mobile ok it was a one off mistake I made....In hind sight a major regret now I know what it feels like to be on receiving end of forus I'm usually the one sitting back eating popcorn while torture begins. Thanks for support folks it been touching.....She's forgot about it its been 6 wks and I have new mobile sO it ok

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

It will probably be a shock to her but I imagine she might say nothing or ask questions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess it depends on what your relationship is with her and what is "normal to be discussed" between you and your child.

At 16 they are over the age of consent (for their own sexual relationships) and could be wise to check out that they have their own ideas about sex, contraception, consent, masturbation etc.

Personally I think it's better for humans to have good sex, and informed choices and respect makes that happen.

If that's not a conversation you can have then just let them come to you.

Good luck, a tricky situation (oh and I haven't berated you for the mistake in the first place because we are all entitled to live and learn)

Mrs Red x

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Oooops ... You really need your own personal equipment and try not to be tempted to use other people s for fabbing ... Hope it all works out for you xx

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Can't understand why you would browse Fab on your childs mac in the first place tbh

Surely you could have waited til ur own pc or laptop or phone was available ?

Have to admit that was my first thought too.

So if it's all ok now, why post asking for advice on what to do? Did it magically become ok in the last 5 hours?

You made a mistake by using a child's (yes i know she is 16 but she is still a child) computer to get your perv on. A stupid thing to do but not the crime of the century. I'd hope that you would be able to talk to her about it, after all its just sex isn't it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi my 16 year old daughter discovered I'm on fab because I didn't delete my history when I used her mac book. All he'll broke loose now banned from using it shed changed password. What advice would you give this happened 6 weeks ago and we haven't discussed it again since for obvious reasons...."

Buy your own laptop, or tablet. there are cheap ones on Internet. I have my own netbook. I delete my history even though I'm the only one who uses it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

both of you have learnt something here i guess - the daughter wont realise until shes older and got more life experience though - my girl is 20 and is outraged by sex stuff like this and if she ever knew i think i would be disowned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love how people judge others..think the op is asking for parental advice not people's opinions on what she's done wrong..some people on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My oldest knows I'm promiscuous. He's ok about it somehow, think because we're quite a liberal family anyway and always been open about things, talk a lot.

Maybe just explain to her that the way your sex life is suits you, and you're an adult. But go off her leads and what she wants to talk about, rather than just give her info or tell her anything.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am pretty open with my 14 year old especially on the birds bees safe sex etc.

It's best they feel comfortable to ask you things rather than make silly mistakes, kids are not as naive as we think they are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love how people judge others..think the op is asking for parental advice not people's opinions on what she's done wrong..some people on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can't understand why you would browse Fab on your childs mac in the first place tbh

Surely you could have waited til ur own pc or laptop or phone was available ?

Have to admit that was my first thought too.

So if it's all ok now, why post asking for advice on what to do? Did it magically become ok in the last 5 hours?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love how people judge others..think the op is asking for parental advice not people's opinions on what she's done wrong..some people on here

My sentiments exactly! This forum is sooooo judgemental! Hope your halos come down and choke you ..WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES!!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Good lord the woman made a mistake!

I can only imagine how awkward this must be for you both.

I'm not sure how I'd handle it either never mention it again (like the time we came home to find the drawer open in our room where I keep the enormous dildo and it was definitely shut when we went out)or sit down with her and say that adults respect each others privacy. The second option could come back to haunt you though if you ever need to intervene I a situation with her.

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love how people judge others..think the op is asking for parental advice not people's opinions on what she's done wrong..some people on here

My sentiments exactly! This forum is sooooo judgemental! Hope your halos come down and choke you ..WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES!!

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By *om Tom 1969Man
over a year ago

liverpool

"I love how people judge others..think the op is asking for parental advice not people's opinions on what she's done wrong..some people on here

"
Completely agree, Fed up of reading questions from members only for judgemental army to appear on the horizon..! If you havent got advice or answers, click on to something else FGS!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it happened to us, we'd probably just say nothing and hope that it would fade into history. If she raises it again, you can simply say that you were being inquisitive. You shouldn't have to explain yourself beyond that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well, at least she knows you like fisting and rimming

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be hopes she doesnt sign up on here now she knows the site lol

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

What you do is nothing to do with your children... Buy your own computer /Ipad.

Dont use your kids stuff.

She has probably joined herself now. I would be inclined to close your account and reopen with a completely different profile /area and private fotos.

Cover your tracks better.

you should discuss it with her dont be ashamed that you have a sex life. will only make it more difficult when she needs advise over relationships etc.

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By *udistnorthantsMan
over a year ago

Desborough

"Be hopes she doesnt sign up on here now she knows the site lol"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 07/11/14 10:03:18]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can't understand why you would browse Fab on your childs mac in the first place tbh

Surely you could have waited til ur own pc or laptop or phone was available ?

Have to admit that was my first thought too.

I think you are being incredibly niave if you think that discovering your mother is on a swinging site is the sort of thing a 16 year old 'forgets'. Particularly given the way you say she reacted

Personally I'd have spoken to her at the time, by ignoring it i fear that you have only reinforced her negative reaction and interpretation about what you are doing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

she may have only found out when logging onto her own account and found she was already logged in on yours

don't really know of any kids\young adults that actually check Internet history, especially on their own devices , that's more of a parent thing

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By *icefellatwoMan
over a year ago

hastings

Did you go red by any chance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"she may have only found out when logging onto her own account and found she was already logged in on yours

don't really know of any kids\young adults that actually check Internet history, especially on their own devices , that's more of a parent thing

More likely that when typing in a website name in the search bar it auto filled the with fabswingers

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By *obbytupperMan
over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

In your favour is the fact that your username is not a particularly descriptive one sexually.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would talk to your daughter, she's probably very confused by now and teenagers are nosey buggers so probably had a good look at your profile, also kids don't like to think of their parents having sex, let alone be on a swinging site and that's why I think it's important that you don't just brush it under the carpet.

As others have said, don't use your child's gadgets to access over 18 sites!

Only use your own devices.

I would also be inclined to either hide or to delete my profile for a while, as I'm sure now that your daughter knows your on the site she will keep popping back on to see what your up to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can't understand why you would browse Fab on your childs mac in the first place tbh

Surely you could have waited til ur own pc or laptop or phone was available ?

Have to admit that was my first thought too.

I think you are being incredibly niave if you think that discovering your mother is on a swinging site is the sort of thing a 16 year old 'forgets'. Particularly given the way you say she reacted

Personally I'd have spoken to her at the time, by ignoring it i fear that you have only reinforced her negative reaction and interpretation about what you are doing."

I totally agree with what Crystal Wheels has written and was about to write very similar.

And if you are "usually the one sitting back eating popcorn while torture begins" you have also been pretty naive in your reaction to your OP!

We all make mistakes its how we deal with them that matters, brushing them under the carpet and hoping there will be no consequences is not always the best option.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can't understand why you would browse Fab on your childs mac in the first place tbh

Surely you could have waited til ur own pc or laptop or phone was available ?

Have to admit that was my first thought too.

I think you are being incredibly niave if you think that discovering your mother is on a swinging site is the sort of thing a 16 year old 'forgets'. Particularly given the way you say she reacted

Personally I'd have spoken to her at the time, by ignoring it i fear that you have only reinforced her negative reaction and interpretation about what you are doing.

I totally agree with what Crystal Wheels has written and was about to write very similar.

And if you are "usually the one sitting back eating popcorn while torture begins" you have also been pretty naive in your reaction to your OP!

We all make mistakes its how we deal with them that matters, brushing them under the carpet and hoping there will be no consequences is not always the best option.

the reaction not your reaction*

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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago

Wakefield

You have two choices do nothing or talk to your daughter.

If you can talk it out with your daughter that is the better option.

She may be more concerned that you used her laptop without asking, than the fact you checked out Fab on it.

Incidentally the reason we do not have our photos on public display on Fab is we have inquisitive children

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

We did talk about it for hours believe me she said her 2 hour speak I denied I was on there said I was just looking not actually a member but I don't think she believed me ok I'm not taking it lightly I know we haven't discussed it again but I think there's not much to say and I wish I hadn't not mentioned it in the forum my mistake for thinking I would get support or advice but I know better now to just comment God forbid I start a New forum Topic I don't think that's gonna happen again people judging my parental skill thanks folks it's hard enough being a single parent then you get all this for just asking for advice thanks but no thanks I don't need it ok Goodbye Forever know wonder people delete their profile while they are on here it makes sense now

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By *earboynottinghamMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

Buy a cheap smartphone and use it for fab.

Was rather silly not delete your brownsing history though!

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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago

Wakefield

I would suggest you made it worse by denying you were on here.

If the boot was on the other foot and you knew your daughter was not telling you the truth surely that would upset you.

Not only have you used her laptop without permission you have tried to play her for a fool by denying you are on fab.

Now she will be thinking what else does my mum hide from me.

Sorry but if I was you I would come clean and talk openly and fully to her.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You have two choices do nothing or talk to your daughter.

If you can talk it out with your daughter that is the better option.

She may be more concerned that you used her laptop without asking, than the fact you checked out Fab on it.

Too be fair I don't want to discuss what she said at the time cos I though that hour was enough ok I don't want to and I know she hasn't forgotten me kind of dishoned me for as long as she can now I have my new mobile I won't be using hers and it was daft not to delete history because that's what I normally do end of story actually don't want to discuss this nothing left to say

Incidentally the reason we do not have our photos on public display on Fab is we have inquisitive children"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 07/11/14 12:00:34]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We did talk about it for hours believe me she said her 2 hour speak I denied I was on there said I was just looking not actually a member but I don't think she believed "

I think unless your daughter is incredibly gullible there is no chance she believed you. Lying to her is pretty insulting and has likely only added to her confusion and upset.

You need to sit her down and be honest with her. She knows due to your fuck up, you should have enough respect for her to try and address her concerns however uncomfortable or embarrassing that may be for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Both my kids found out i was on here and i told them both it had nothing to do with them that i was an adult and as long as i was carefull it was up to me. Both are still not happy but let me get on with it x this sandra mesgin not graeme im his g f x

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By *ombshellWoman
over a year ago

islington

sit down and talk to your kids... explain the situation obviously without going into too much detail...

My kids have known from the start that i have been on Fab as im always open and honest with them.... stops things being seen as 'seedy' and so long as mum is safe, they are happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have i missed something here you said you are banned because she changed password that means your daughter age 16 has access to fab fucks sake this is beyond stupid.

Plus as the parent you are in charge make sure she does not have access to her mac book till she gives you the password.

Something seems very odd about this whole thibg.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have i missed something here you said you are banned because she changed password that means your daughter age 16 has access to fab fucks sake this is beyond stupid.

Plus as the parent you are in charge make sure she does not have access to her mac book till she gives you the password.

Something seems very odd about this whole thibg."

i took it as child has stopped mum from using the computer - and changed the password on that not fab

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You have two choices do nothing or talk to your daughter.

If you can talk it out with your daughter that is the better option.

She may be more concerned that you used her laptop without asking, than the fact you checked out Fab on it.

Incidentally the reason we do not have our photos on public display on Fab is we have inquisitive children

This is at least the second time in 24 hours that someone has posted a thread and then gotten stroppy with those who post replies. Why ask if you are not prepared to hear people's opinions, you do not have to like or agree with them but if you post on a public forum you have to be prepared for that, don't you?

OP you have been offered plenty of constructive advice throughout this thread, whether you choose to take it is for you to decide but you do yourself no favours by throwing a tantrum because it didn't all go your way.

Swinging is for grown ups - behaving like one makes a difference to how people perceive you.

As a parent you cannot set a time limit on how long a child needs to discuss something, as they filter information so their thoughts expand and further questions and opinions come to light. It is how you deal with them that makes the difference, lying or avoiding a subject because you are embarrassed will not help resolve a difficult situation.

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By *ombshellWoman
over a year ago

islington

"Have i missed something here you said you are banned because she changed password that means your daughter age 16 has access to fab fucks sake this is beyond stupid.

Plus as the parent you are in charge make sure she does not have access to her mac book till she gives you the password.

Something seems very odd about this whole thibg.

i took it as child has stopped mum from using the computer - and changed the password on that not fab "

i took it as that too

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By *S_PennyTV/TS
over a year ago

Selby

Isn't this what private browsing tabs were made for?

Give her time. She's probably just shocked especially if you lay the law down to her at all about sleeping around which I know I will be to my daughter at that age. She probably would be pissed then as she'd probably think bloody hypocrite, but if you're open with her it will get better I'm sure.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe an opportunity for discussing free choice and safe sex with your daughter? I'd confess, but keep the details obviously very brief.

And possibly ask what she saw, and if she has any questions?

Better it come from you than her mates.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think she messaged me asking for tips on makeup

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By *y2funMan
over a year ago

DUDLEY

"I can't comprehend the level of awkwardness."

heard only this week a guy found out his mom had bene on here and he's not spoken to her for over a year now..

some kids can't hadle the idea of their parents being sexualy let alone shagging around...

I' think I'd leave the dust settle and work on the over all relationship, spend time with him doing stuff... that way you might create an atmosphere he feels he can talk about it with you.....

how you explain you like cock from strangers is another matter

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By *icefellatwoMan
over a year ago

hastings

"We did talk about it for hours believe me she said her 2 hour speak I denied I was on there said I was just looking not actually a member but I don't think she believed me ok I'm not taking it lightly I know we haven't discussed it again but I think there's not much to say and I wish I hadn't not mentioned it in the forum my mistake for thinking I would get support or advice but I know better now to just comment God forbid I start a New forum Topic I don't think that's gonna happen again people judging my parental skill thanks folks it's hard enough being a single parent then you get all this for just asking for advice thanks but no thanks I don't need it ok Goodbye Forever know wonder people delete their profile while they are on here it makes sense now

You made a mistake its not the end of the world time heals keep smiling

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By *y2funMan
over a year ago

DUDLEY

My kids have known from the start that i have been on Fab as im always open and honest with them..."

why you'd want to tell your kids is beyond me but each to their own guess.... can't ever see a point when I would want to discuss Fab with my daughter and I'm sure Ang feels the same, if fact I know.... its called a private life for a reason...

anyone else "out" with there kids? sorry OP if this goes off-topic.

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By *icefellatwoMan
over a year ago

hastings

"I can't comprehend the level of awkwardness.

heard only this week a guy found out his mom had bene on here and he's not spoken to her for over a year now..

some kids can't hadle the idea of their parents being sexualy let alone shagging around...

I' think I'd leave the dust settle and work on the over all relationship, spend time with him doing stuff... that way you might create an atmosphere he feels he can talk about it with you.....

how you explain you like cock from strangers is another matter

Who says he would be a stranger

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By *iss-PinkWoman
over a year ago

Gloucester

Within an hour of your first post it's all ok?? Really?

The idea of using one of my kids' tablets to check fab just makes me shudder, tbh. Fab is surely not such an important thing that it can't wait for however long to check it some other time on a more appropriate device...?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't worry too much as it was probably just a shock too her at the time, I think most teenagers struggle to accept that their parents might be interested in sex. it is probably best for the long run though if you can explain to her about swinging and that you do have needs and an apology for using her mac book.

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By *MaleMan
over a year ago

Live and learn really. Some people aint got a clue their online tracks can be sussed out quite simply & innocently

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