FabSwingers.com forum: Have a Look....

By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

Can someone look at my profile and any advice will be gratefully received.

Many thanks for taking the time to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You met 2 so your doing fine lol.

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By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

Well yes I have but well just feeling insecure really

How ever thank you for the feedback

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

If you are feeling insecure then this kind of post is really not going to help you.

Good luck.

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By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

What I mean is I feel insecure that I have done or said something wrong

How ever thanks for your reply

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

Loving the username. My status was about matt smith yesterday lol x

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

I don't believe your current status message moaning about unanswered messages is going to help you. If you spend any time at all on the forums you'll have read so many threads and messages about that and read the justifiable reaction to them... :no answer=no interest and any reply is as often as not met with abuse so many do not reply.

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By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

Thanks Gorden but I wont change that sorry but I wont I'm always polite etc and expect the same is that to much to ask ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't believe your current status message moaning about unanswered messages is going to help you. If you spend any time at all on the forums you'll have read so many threads and messages about that and read the justifiable reaction to them... :no answer=no interest and any reply is as often as not met with abuse so many do not reply."

I agree, negative status updates are off putting. Is a no reply really soul destroying? I think not

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

No public pics, a moderately negative profile and a very negative status.

Without public pics, not many people will want to take a chance to get to know you as a person. It's not easy explaining to someone, that they look like Pancho Villa or their dad/brother and they don't want to take it further.

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By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

I cant win can I ? I had my photos on my profile but again that put a lot off

So damned if I do damned if I dont

Thanks for your feedback though I do appreciate it

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By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

I agree, negative status updates are off putting. Is a no reply really soul destroying? I think not

I'm sorry but I feel it is ! Would you ignore me if we met in real life ? No of course you wouldnt so why is it acceptable on-line ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I cant win can I ? I had my photos on my profile but again that put a lot off

So damned if I do damned if I dont

Thanks for your feedback though I do appreciate it "

There's no point possibly getting into a conversation with someone then sending pics only to be turned down, seems a waste of time to me for both parties and if you find a no reply soul destroying, how would you find a block after chatting and sending pics??!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree, negative status updates are off putting. Is a no reply really soul destroying? I think not

I'm sorry but I feel it is ! Would you ignore me if we met in real life ? No of course you wouldnt so why is it acceptable on-line ?"

In the real world, you're not called a fat ungrateful bitch if you politely say hi then decline anything further!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree, negative status updates are off putting. Is a no reply really soul destroying? I think not

I'm sorry but I feel it is ! Would you ignore me if we met in real life ? No of course you wouldnt so why is it acceptable on-line ?"

no reply = not interested, how is an inbox full of no thanks gonna make you feel? a reply is a no thanks

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I'm sorry but I feel it is ! Would you ignore me if we met in real life ? No of course you wouldnt so why is it acceptable on-line ?"

Yes, but you don't get 200 people saying hello can I have a chat with you in the real world. On here a lot of lasses get 200 messages a day, I know even I do.

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By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

I dont even get that far ! When I have emailed someone for the first time and don't get a reply, even a no thank you its really hurtful.

I accept that I'm not for everyone how ever I do expect a reply if I have been polite etc to them its common courtesy really or am I asking to much ?

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By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

Now I get that what we could do with is a No Thank you Button at least they have thought about your email or even you !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I dont even get that far ! When I have emailed someone for the first time and don't get a reply, even a no thank you its really hurtful.

I accept that I'm not for everyone how ever I do expect a reply if I have been polite etc to them its common courtesy really or am I asking to much ?"

This subject has been covered lots on here. Some women as others have said, can get in excess of 100 messages a day. What makes your message and profile stand out enough in amongst those to get a reply? How long do you think it would take to type 100 no thank you's whilst getting more messages because you are online then, if you don't block after a no thanks, you either get abuse or the Spanish inquisition as to why you're not interested. If a no reply bothers you that much I would suggest this may not be the best site for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now I get that what we could do with is a No Thank you Button at least they have thought about your email or even you !"

wouldn't work, coz thats just the same as typing it out and the recipient having 200 messages saying no thanks isn't gonna make them feel any better, like i've said twice now, no reply IS a no thanks

you don't need it typing out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

First line of your profile made me want to hit you with a trout.

Didn't read further.

If you have to tell people not to judge you before they are even told anything about you strongly indicates that you judge yourself and think others will too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"First line of your profile made me want to hit you with a trout.

Didn't read further.

If you have to tell people not to judge you before they are even told anything about you strongly indicates that you judge yourself and think others will too.

lmfao "hit you with a trout"! XD

you do make me laugh sometimes lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I cant win can I ? I had my photos on my profile but again that put a lot off

So damned if I do damned if I dont

Thanks for your feedback though I do appreciate it "

Seems odd to us... This site is about people meeting, often just based on physical attraction rather than mental attraction. If people are put off by your pictures then it is best to be upfront from the outset. If we built up a mental attraction with somebody, then saw their pictures and had no physical attraction, we would stop it from going further.

From our point of view, we prefer a profile with slightly better grammar and spelling. Copy it into a MS Word (or similar), check and copy/paste it back in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"First line of your profile made me want to hit you with a trout.

Didn't read further.

If you have to tell people not to judge you before they are even told anything about you strongly indicates that you judge yourself and think others will too.

Fresh out of trout - would a halibut be a good substitue?

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By *sThunderThighsWoman
over a year ago

Toy Land

Concentrate on the ones that reply !!!!! Don't moan ! Its not attractive ! And put a pic on your profile !

Unless its a quiet day and I'm bored ! I usually don't bother even looking at the ones with no pics !!! I don't have the time to chat to everyone !!! So if a nice pic takes my fancy ! And the profile is jolly and upbeat, That's the one I choose !

This sounds harsh but someone once said on a thread like this "you don't send a reply to every bit of junk mail you get in the post! Just the ones you are interested in" fabs a bit like that!!! and when I first joined I thought it was rude not to reply !!! That soon changed ! And those who read my profile will know that b4 they message me !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At least you've had two meets iv had none

Need to stop being soo bloody picky

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

No pics = no meets

Negativity = no meets

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By *issy louWoman
over a year ago

Staffordshire Moorlands

"I dont even get that far ! When I have emailed someone for the first time and don't get a reply, even a no thank you its really hurtful.

I accept that I'm not for everyone how ever I do expect a reply if I have been polite etc to them its common courtesy really or am I asking to much ?"

I don't see how an inbox full of 'thanks but no thanks' messages would make you feel any better?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Didn't really get past the negative status and opening line to be honest. As for no replies - it has been done to death. No reply is a reply - it means they are not iinterested. It's not rude and if that's soul destroying how the hell would an inbox of 'thanks but no thanks' make you feel?

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By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

In case anyone is remotely intrested I've put my profile on Hidden just so I can sort a few things out.

After a very long email chat with MsThunderThighs we came ( or rather she did lol ) to the conclusion as to where I was going wrong. Taking her advice on board I know what I have to do so until I have done so I've put my profile as private.

So I would also just like to give my personal and public Thanks to MsThunderThighs Thank you thats the kinda advice I needed X You , for me , went above and beyond what I was expecting.

Good luck in finding your bald inked Guys lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In case anyone is remotely intrested I've put my profile on Hidden just so I can sort a few things out.

So I would also just like to give my personal and public Thanks to MsThunderThighs Thank you thats the kinda advice I needed X You , for me , went above and beyond what I was expecting.

Good luck in finding your bald inked Guys lol

I noticed you'd hidden your profile.

The good thing is that you've taken on board some of the advice given to you in that you are revising your profile.

That's positive

As for the matter of politeness, read the site FAQ's. It's been done to death on the forum.

Taken from the FAQ's

There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?

I understand exactly where you are coming from with the whole politeness thing. And yes, it's demoralising to spend time crafting a message only to see it get deleted without so much as a 'how d'ya do' - but that's how it is here. You have to get used to it.

I have.

Channel your energies into more positive action.

But remember, there are so many of us single guys on here that the ladies really can pick and choose.

Cheer up fella

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By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

"In case anyone is remotely intrested I've put my profile on Hidden just so I can sort a few things out.

So I would also just like to give my personal and public Thanks to MsThunderThighs Thank you thats the kinda advice I needed X You , for me , went above and beyond what I was expecting.

Good luck in finding your bald inked Guys lol

I noticed you'd hidden your profile.

The good thing is that you've taken on board some of the advice given to you in that you are revising your profile.

That's positive

As for the matter of politeness, read the site FAQ's. It's been done to death on the forum.

Taken from the FAQ's

There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

I have.

Channel your energies into more positive action.

But remember, there are so many of us single guys on here that the ladies really can pick and choose.

Cheer up fella

Thanks Mate

Its nice to hear that a male also thinks its " demoralizing " that makes a change lol

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By *ordgirlWoman
over a year ago

Stockport

would do but your profile is hidden!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ermm hide n seek?

Her

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By *he_Raggedy_Doctor OP Man
over a year ago

Some where in West Sussex

"Ermm hide n seek?

Her

Yeah its called " Hide the Sausage " lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ermm hide n seek?

Her

Yeah its called " Hide the Sausage " lol

See, you've cheered up already.

Even cracking jokes now

That's the spirit

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