FabSwingers.com forum: Messages which have been read but not replied to

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi all

As a single guy I am always very concious to be be very selective in my mailings (what's the point in me mailing someone who won't meet smokers, for example) and try not to 'pester' the people that I mail with endless mails.

My question is, what sort of time should i leave it before mailing someone who has read a message but not replied (or deleted it).

I go on the assumption that a delete means not interested but too busy (or not arsed) to reply saying no thanks.

Thanks in advance for any helpfull comentry.

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By *woBiTwoCouple
over a year ago

north manchester

see our new thread about volumes of messages...

To be honest, if they dont reply, we dont chase, as it seems most likely they aren't interested in us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do people really keep checking there sent mail folder to see the status of their sent messages, that doesn't sound like much fun, prefer to consentrate on our inbox and the replies we do get and forget about the sent items folder.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if they dont reply they're not interested!! its annoying getting another message...even if i've bothered to reply previously with a no thanks.....

so that means you're undesirable and annoying to boot!!!!

c xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tip for ya

I have always used this one

If ya send a message then just forget about it

If ya get a reply then great

If not don't loose sleep simples xx

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By *tomComMan
over a year ago

Wellingborough

A question?

Why would you remail them?

You have mailed them once, they have read your mail. So why are you chomping at the bit to remail?

Andy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you've mailed them once then they have your message and if they're interested they will reply. No need to send any more than that, what will it achieve? (except maybe reducing your chances!)

I did once send a message to a couple, and got a reply about 2 months later! Extreme example, but just to show you it does happen. If I'd mailed them again, I doubt very much that they'd have got back to me at all.

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By *ansue35Couple
over a year ago

yorkshire

We get winks once or twice a month from someone that has wink or messaged us a month or so ago.

I hate it when you writeback to them after they have winked at you and do not get a reply, even thou they messaged / wink to you first.

Again most liekly they did not like what you wrote.

But i fin it hard to write when all you got is a wink or a one liner.

Sue

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi all

Thanks for the feedback

Check my inbox? I should be so lucky! I never write one liners Sue, I wouldn't expect to get a reply from those. Make a comment about a profile, or a joke etc, just to get things rolling.

My meets have mostly been through the chat rooms, but due to a change in circumstances I am reduced to staying local and not many locals seem to use chat.

Well, just keep plugging away I spose. Cheers

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By *ansue35Couple
over a year ago

yorkshire

Chat to fast for me.

Am still using the old stone type writer.

we seem to just plod along and still enjoy ourselves.

Sue

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By *tomComMan
over a year ago

Wellingborough

[Removed by poster at 24/06/10 13:40:46]

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

"Hi all

Thanks for the feedback

Check my inbox? I should be so lucky! I never write one liners Sue, I wouldn't expect to get a reply from those. Make a comment about a profile, or a joke etc, just to get things rolling.

My meets have mostly been through the chat rooms, but due to a change in circumstances I am reduced to staying local and not many locals seem to use chat.

Well, just keep plugging away I spose. Cheers"

Or NOT plugging away as the case may be!

If they haven't replied then it looks like they don't want to, so if it was me then I wouldn't mail them again.

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

"Chat, typewriter ????

What is wrong with Cave paining ??

Simplfy people, simplfy ... hehe"

Again in English please!

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By *tomComMan
over a year ago

Wellingborough

Chat, typewriter ????

What is wrong with cave painting ??

Simplfy people, simplfy ... hehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do people really keep checking there sent mail folder to see the status of their sent messages, that doesn't sound like much fun, prefer to consentrate on our inbox and the replies we do get and forget about the sent items folder. "

That was my first thought!!

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

"Chat, typewriter ????

What is wrong with cave painting ??

Simplfy people, simplfy ... hehe"

Thanks

Simplify what though? lol

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By *obletonMan
over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures

"Hi all

My question is, what sort of time should i leave it before mailing someone who has read a message but not replied (or deleted it).

I go on the assumption that a delete means not interested but too busy (or not arsed) to reply saying no thanks.

Thanks in advance for any helpfull comentry."

I dont agree that a lack of a reply is any indication of lack of interest - there could be any number of reasons why someone does not reply to a particular message at any moment in time - and not interested is only one of them.

I have experienced several occasions where a well crafted message that ticks all the boxes of someone's profile has been ignored, only to either have that person mail me at a later date, or have a much more positive response to message sent a few months later.

So if someone chooses not to reply, in turn I choose not to strike them off my list until such a time that they do.

So in answer to the OP - it depends on the nature of the message - if its an introduction email, I would leave it a minimum of 6 weeks to 2 months - if its someone you are already chatting to and the conversation appears to have faltered a little, without any clear reason or obvious conflict of interest / lack of attraction, then give it about a week before a "where were we?" type of message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd agree with you there. I often come online and have a quick read through my messages but don't have enough time to message back. But if I like the person, I'll leave it sitting in my inbox then have a big replying session when I'm less busy

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By *ickens CiderMan
over a year ago

taunton

Sadly you need content in your inbox... so checking your sent folder is the only messaging excitement some of have...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

everytime you send a message. delete it from your sent items. especially if you're a single guy. the ball is in everyone else's court but yours.

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