FabSwingers.com forum: new to bdsm

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'd like to try some bdsm, starting light at first until I get a feel for what I like. Problem is the experienced are seeking experience. I don't want to do it with a novice like myself. Are there any people who would relish the opportunity to get their hands on fresh meat and teach me a thing or two lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a shame you are so far away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This kind of post will invite all the plastic Doms to your inbox. My advice would be to look at munches in your local area and speak to the people there. There is another site that better caters for BDSM and the junkies side of things but we're not allowed to mention it, even by pm.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This kind of post will invite all the plastic Doms to your inbox. My advice would be to look at munches in your local area and speak to the people there. There is another site that better caters for BDSM and the junkies side of things but we're not allowed to mention it, even by pm."

Munches??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Munches??"

Organised BDSM socials.

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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago

Northampton

BDSM is a huge thing.. seems 'easy' to get into, but there is so much learning to do!!

(sorry to ramble, but I'm just going to anyway lol.. might get a few pointers)

What do you WANT out of it?

Do you fancy the sub or domme role, both, or not sure?

How mentally prepared are you?

How far do you want to go? Do you want to be tied up and have your ass spanked whipped and pounded, or do you want someone who can tease your mind?

Do you want to explore with a woman or man?

Do you want to be collared one day?

Its all very well asking for BDSM people on here.. but to be honest I have found most guys think it is just calling a girl a slut, spanking her ass then fucking as hard as they can lol.

Out of the hundreds and hundreds of men messaging me over the time I have been on here, only 2 (yes 2) are what I would call proper Masters.

Good luck chick!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Munches??

Organised BDSM socials."

Thanks x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not just the plastic Doms, but also the 'sharks' who prey on the inexperienced.

OP just a friendly heads you, but if you're new you also need to prepare yourself for play and all that entails. Brush up on things like aftercare, sub drop, and sub frenzy. Find out the things within the scene that you want to explore, and TAKE YOUR TIME! Playing is about trust and a good Dom will earn yours and get to know you properly before playing. Any one who wants to play quickly is best avoided for your own safety. And never ever let a Dom tell you that because you submit to them, anything they want goes. It just doesn't work that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Research research research

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By *mmabluTV/TS
over a year ago

upton wirral

Look for a good fet site(cannot give full name here).There you will find details of meets in and around Manchester and plenty of advice,good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is the wrong site for you

As stated above by others there is a well known FETish LIFEstyle site that caters for all sorts of kinks, you could use google

Google munches also

And maybe the Birmingham BBB

Kinksters are fun....and very accepting

We go to lots of events....can make this ere stuff seem very vanilla

Enjoy and expand your horizons

Have fun.

Damn caps lock on....sorry

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By *randMrsHorny24Couple
over a year ago

South wales

Bdsm is something u need to research properly depending on what you want out of it!! u need to set limits, u need a safeword but a real dom should respect u and ure wishes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My friend is into bdsm and we went to our first event on Saturday... It was defiantly an eye opener for me... You need to look more into it like everyone is suggesting

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By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

Anyone that you may consider playing with in the bdsm world that knows what they are doing and is any good will sit down with you and talk about you desires and limits and theirs before you play. If they don't then is suggest you would be unwise to play with them.

It takes time like anything else it is definitely not something that should be jumped into blindly. There's already great advice re: munches/socials and other websites that cater more for the Fet style Life.

Explore the scene figure out what you might like to try and talk to others

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

Referring to yourself as fresh meat won't help your cause as Mr Who is right in what he says.

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By *iggerooooCouple
over a year ago

Conwy

Best advice I can give you (being a genuine dom for years)

The sub has more control.

You set the boundries, your limits and fantasies ... what you want and dont want.

The dom, they are just there to help you tick those off.

I personally would steer clear of any messages that tell you exactly what they are going to do to you.

Instead, go for the few that actually question what you want, how and why.

I love to introduce people into this exciting world, it's a shame you are not closer.

Just remember it's about you, what you want and how can the guy you choose help you achieve what you want

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By *iggerooooCouple
over a year ago

Conwy

[Removed by poster at 06/08/14 00:18:25]

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By *iggerooooCouple
over a year ago

Conwy

Just noticed you are actually not far from us anyway.

My partner is sub and coukd also help too.

Feel free to inbox me any questions, ill help all I can x

(Even if you are not interested in us)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a sub full time, and listen to the advice given re attending your local Munch, great place to meet like minded people and are great places to socialise in a relaxed environment.

The website already mentioned is also a great place to find information and start looking for events close to you.

We regularly attend the BDSM events at Townhouse and it's home from home to us now, it can be an amazing lifestyle but my advice would be to take it slowly and remember there is no rush to experience everything all at once!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd like to try some bdsm, starting light at first until I get a feel for what I like. Problem is the experienced are seeking experience. I don't want to do it with a novice like myself. Are there any people who would relish the opportunity to get their hands on fresh meat and teach me a thing or two lol"

Shame you are in Manchester and i don't drive I could recommend a mentor

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is a munch in Manchester on August 12th

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By *aster of a mindCouple
over a year ago

York

Please be assured that any BDSM event you attend will be hosted by a Dungeon Master/Mistress(DM). They are there to supervise/control/advise. They would be more than happy to talk you through anything you want or introduce you to genuine safe people at the event.

There is a misconception that s soon as you walk in someone is going to start bating you and dragging you to a dungeon against your will. You couldn't be more wrong. Alcohol consumption is not encouraged by those who are playing, the etiquette is a lot stricter than the swinging scene and you can go just to watch if you want to. Lots of people don't play at these events, there is no sex (unless at a swingers club). please don't think you need to have any knowledge, there are many different roles and you can only choose one once you know what is out there. Hope you enjoy it, we certainly do

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This is the wrong site for you

As stated above by others there is a well known FETish LIFEstyle site that caters for all sorts of kinks, you could use google

Google munches alsoo

And maybe the Birmingham BBB

Kinksters are fun....and very accepting

We go to lots of events....can make this ere stuff seem very vanilla

Enjoy and expand your horizons

Have fun.

Damn caps lock on....sorry "

Why is this the wrong site for me I like others things too I'm not narrow minded. And as I have yet to try bdsm if I ever do, it may not be for me anyway. You and plenty of others are on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is the wrong site for you

As stated above by others there is a well known FETish LIFEstyle site that caters for all sorts of kinks, you could use google

Google munches alsoo

And maybe the Birmingham BBB

Kinksters are fun....and very accepting

We go to lots of events....can make this ere stuff seem very vanilla

Enjoy and expand your horizons

Have fun.

Damn caps lock on....sorry

Why is this the wrong site for me I like others things too I'm not narrow minded. And as I have yet to try bdsm if I ever do, it may not be for me anyway. You and plenty of others are on here

There are a lot of people on here from that lifestyle but there are also loads of wanna be doms. People are saying this is the wrong site because they are looking out for you. Maybe other places would be better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is the wrong site for you

As stated above by others there is a well known FETish LIFEstyle site that caters for all sorts of kinks, you could use google

Google munches alsoo

And maybe the Birmingham BBB

Kinksters are fun....and very accepting

We go to lots of events....can make this ere stuff seem very vanilla

Enjoy and expand your horizons

Have fun.

Damn caps lock on....sorry

Why is this the wrong site for me I like others things too I'm not narrow minded. And as I have yet to try bdsm if I ever do, it may not be for me anyway. You and plenty of others are on here

I think that tge suggestion waa that other sites cater for BDSM better than this one not that you shouldn't be here. Personally I think there are plenty of knowledgeable people on this site. And people with limited knowledge tgat fail to recognise that can just as easily be found on morr specialist sites.

As others have said, find your local munch and meet people in real life

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By *iggerooooCouple
over a year ago

Conwy

For advice os bdsm or a forum to chat with more likeminded or experienced doms, other sites are better.

This is not "the wrong site" at all, plenty on here looking for all types of different pleasures ... if anyone feels you can't use this site for anything other than "normal sex" I would suggest the site is wrong for you lol

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

Good on you for avoiding newbies. You could easily get put off with someone throwing everything in at once. Having said that, I'd expect more experienced Doms are that used to an easy build up to harder play, they will have to adjust what they do, and how they approach things. Whoever it is, vet them on how they play, tastes, number of subs, and years of experience. If they sound too much a fantasy - they are probably making it up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've only just noticed that my first post contains the word 'junkies'. This was an autocarrot error, it should have said 'fetish'.

I really should learn to proof read before I hit the post message button...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've read all the posts. I was thinking about researching this, not sure about the fresh meat analogy. But I have learnt one thing that a experienced guy would be the way to go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I started discovering my sub side about 18 months ago and even though I call myself submissive there are things I'm still learning about the lifestyle all the time.

Starting off slow is definitely the best way, with someone who you trust. I don't think I would have got into BDSM if it wasn't for one person who opened my eyes to a lot of experiences.

If you want to message me or ask any questions then do. I come over to Manchester fairly regularly and would be happy to chat. X

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By *enninemarkMan
over a year ago

huddersfield/manchester

"Research research research"

This!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well isn't this thread bringing out the kinksters....Hello my people

and welcome to the world of fun Miss DD

, done right its bloody awesome

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well isn't this thread bringing out the kinksters....Hello my people

and welcome to the world of fun Miss DD

, done right its bloody awesome "

A lot of us kinksters have been here for ages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would love to start this too.

I was asked years ago to Dom a gent i was playing with did it a few times but on the last i suddenly burst out laughing it was then i knew my heart wasn't in it

On the sub side i'm very interested BUT do you have to be collared?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would love to start this too.

I was asked years ago to Dom a gent i was playing with did it a few times but on the last i suddenly burst out laughing it was then i knew my heart wasn't in it

On the sub side i'm very interested BUT do you have to be collared?"

There is no need to be collared

. Pretty sure there is a munch in Kingstonand tgthere's at least one in West London as well as loads of London events

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would love to start this too.

I was asked years ago to Dom a gent i was playing with did it a few times but on the last i suddenly burst out laughing it was then i knew my heart wasn't in it

On the sub side i'm very interested BUT do you have to be collared?"

Absolutely not, I am collared but only accepted that collar once we had a real relationship going and when I was ready to accept him as my full time Dom. My collar is as important to me as my engagement ring and symbolises my love and trust in my Dom, although collars do mean different things to different people.

Mine is locked in place and he knows the ultimate punishment for me would be to unlock it, thankfully he would never do this without extreme provocation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have a look at the gatehouse in club section its only in bolton

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By *ot4ujoWoman
over a year ago

Eccles

Your not far from me I was interested in Bdsm for a while and wanted more experience

So I attended a event at the gatehouse in bolton it was a fun interesting night everyone I met was very helpful they normaly have demos on to for me the best bit was no one expected me to do anything , the second time I went ended up having really fun night never laughed so much but it opened my eye to different styles of doms

And also what I like

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"Fet"

Life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Munches??"

You know fab cafe on portland street? The geeky bar with the the cyber man and star trek bridge lol.

There's a munch there once a month. Not entirely sure on the date but Google should find it. It's a good laugh.

Otherwise kage at partners last Sunday of the months lot of people meet up at the arndale before going (look for the group of wrll dressed people with bags and carrying a ballon).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh and club lash is sexond Saturday of the month at the alter ego club in the village by canal street.

Not a swingers event so no nudity from the waist down. But they have a full dungeon brought in with excellent quality equipment plus the DMs are fantastic, older guy with long hair and a beard used to be an aircraft electrician has a fantastic home made frequency generator for e stim.

Very cool use for is sub hold one probe dom holds the other then in his had has a blunted knife (an old bayonet) when you touch the sub with that (gotta keep a finger on the blade) it completes the circuit and gives them the shock from the knife edge very cool with a bit of tweaking you can get a lot of sensations.

Obviously you could jist use your finger to deliver the charge nut the knife is cooler lol

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