FabSwingers.com forum: Not able to accommodate

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So, on my profile it says 'cannot accommodate'- it does not matter why I put that in, that is just my preference.

If you were to arrange to meet me, hypothetically speaking, would you expect me to take you home? Would you be trying to persuade me it was ok because you were 'nice'?

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By *-4pleasureCouple
over a year ago

Belfast

"So, on my profile it says 'cannot accommodate'- it does not matter why I put that in, that is just my preference.

If you were to arrange to meet me, hypothetically speaking, would you expect me to take you home? Would you be trying to persuade me it was ok because you were 'nice'?"

No - because you don't accommodate.

Next....

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By *lf and ElfetteCouple
over a year ago

Goole

No we would be getting you to go to our hotel room lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks. I have been teetering on the point of being persuaded otherwise but my instincts were to say no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you are just meeting them for a quick knee-tremble then surely your home is the last place you want the cock-meat (tm) to visit?

Might turn out to be a nutter etc

Premier Inn are used to nutters * so no drama methinks

* other budget hotels are available (but not as good)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So, on my profile it says 'cannot accommodate'- it does not matter why I put that in, that is just my preference.

If you were to arrange to meet me, hypothetically speaking, would you expect me to take you home? Would you be trying to persuade me it was ok because you were 'nice'?"

People do what they want they don't have to explain however you will get people who will assume the reasons for not doing so.

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By *onkers 76Man
over a year ago

pontypool

Don't be persuaded it's your choice and that should be respected 100% xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its quite simply your choice whether you choose to accommodate or not, if people wish to jump to the wrong conclusions then so be it.

Do whatever you feel comfortable doing and enjoy yourself, your not here for other peoples justification

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By *oulou45Woman
over a year ago

Bucks

"So, on my profile it says 'cannot accommodate'- it does not matter why I put that in, that is just my preference.

If you were to arrange to meet me, hypothetically speaking, would you expect me to take you home? Would you be trying to persuade me it was ok because you were 'nice'?"
maybe give a reason why you cant. Thats always said to the guys. I have on mine that I can but gor an experiment changed it to I cant. My messages dropped lol.x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't accommodate.

If people really want to meet you, this won't be a big deal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't and won't and will never change my mind. Stick to the reasons you can't accomodate.

A nutter will always claim to be nice. They won't admit to being a nutter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"would you expect me to take you home? "

No that's ok I know the way home

First meet no way venue would be sorted before the meet, if a social became more then my place or hotel. 10th meet well we may discuss that around then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A nutter will always claim to be nice. They won't admit to being a nutter.

I do, it's 90% of my charm

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By *adyGardenWoman
over a year ago

LONDON (se)

I have often had guys try persuade me. If you don't accommodate then why the hell should I. I don't hassle you so don't hassle me.

Done. Case closed. Next

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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago

Retirement Village

"So, on my profile it says 'cannot accommodate'- it does not matter why I put that in, that is just my preference.

If you were to arrange to meet me, hypothetically speaking, would you expect me to take you home? Would you be trying to persuade me it was ok because you were 'nice'?"

Would try to persuade you. Not for allowing me back to yours but to meet a new fwb

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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago

Retirement Village

"I don't and won't and will never change my mind. Stick to the reasons you can't accomodate.

A nutter will always claim to be nice. They won't admit to being a nutter.

I'm a nutter, take me home please

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

I don't accommodate because I live alone and I'm not prepared to hand my home address out to randoms off the internet - no matter how nice they seem!

For the same reason I won't go to someone's home for a first meet, I always have a coffee meet in a busy cafe first. Then if I go to theirs I text their address and username to one of my friends along with an approximate time I'll be out. If she hasn't heard from me by that time she knows where to go with a baseball bat and the rottie (ahem) send the police.

Once I've got to know someone and feel comfortable then I may invite them to my home, but my friend still gets a text just in case.

I've heard too many horror stories as well as meeting a few very odd and intimidating people to be careless about my safety.

Men shouldn't think they're safe either, a good friend of mine got beaten up and his house burgled when his meet turned up with friends.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A nutter will always claim to be nice. They won't admit to being a nutter.

I do, it's 90% of my charm

Is the other 10% chocolate?

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By *ent_LifeMan
over a year ago

East Malling

You are the woman you have the power, you get to choose anything and everything about the meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is the other 10% chocolate?

"
5% chocolate and 5% Victoria Sponge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You are the woman you have the power, you get to choose anything and everything about the meet"

Errr no I don't think so. That's not how it works at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So, on my profile it says 'cannot accommodate'- it does not matter why I put that in, that is just my preference.

If you were to arrange to meet me, hypothetically speaking, would you expect me to take you home? Would you be trying to persuade me it was ok because you were 'nice'?"

No. Cos I'd respect your choice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

whatever anyone states in their profile should be respected! the initial point of contact is usually the profile, so if someone tries to persuade you to bend your rules then they are being ignorant to your boundaries!!! especially 1 as simple as getting a hotel, its £40 so dump them for being cheapskates anyway

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"whatever anyone states in their profile should be respected! the initial point of contact is usually the profile, so if someone tries to persuade you to bend your rules then they are being ignorant to your boundaries!!! especially 1 as simple as getting a hotel, its £40 so dump them for being cheapskates anyway

Exactly.

£20 each to be in a neutral place for the first play is not extortionate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't accomodate anyone on the first time meeting, is common sense. Women are much more vulnerable than men physically. For men though, I would hesitate to meet if they cant accomodate because it often means they are in a relationship n'est pas?

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"I wouldn't accomodate anyone on the first time meeting, is common sense. Women are much more vulnerable than men physically. For men though, I would hesitate to meet if they cant accomodate because it often means they are in a relationship n'est pas?

I always ask very early on why they can't accommodate. I've had some great meets with people who live in house shares or with relatives and who have been turned down repeatedly because people assume they are married.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah, that's why said hesitate rather than turn down

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Yeah, that's why said hesitate rather than turn down

The married ones often just say so or, if they're trying to hide it, they give themselves away in other ways.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't accommodate as I have a family. My naughtyness is very different to the actual me....so that would be wierd. Plus hotels, outside (once you know the person enough to be secluded with them) are really fun and add to the excitement

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"I don't accommodate as I have a family. My naughtyness is very different to the actual me....so that would be wierd. Plus hotels, outside (once you know the person enough to be secluded with them) are really fun and add to the excitement

And someone else gets to clear up, change the sheets and do the laundry!

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

Hang on, han gon.. so if am reading this right (the tone of the thread):

Women that can't/won't accomodate: their right and it should be respected.

Men that can't/won't accomodate: married

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By *he Ring WraithMan
over a year ago

Bradford

Your house, your life your choice; do as you wish; if people don't want to meet you because of it then there will be people who accept it and you can meet those who are more tolerant.

There are double standards on here when it comes to accommodating (what a surprise); a lady doesn't and its for her safety; a guy doesn't and he's married. Why people don't is up to them !

(I am not suggesting that you have double standards OP but some do).

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Hang on, han gon.. so if am reading this right (the tone of the thread):

Women that can't/won't accomodate: their right and it should be respected.

Men that can't/won't accomodate: married

Not all of us said that, some of us ask. And I don't mind if anyone asks why I don't accommodate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

put your own take on it but.. theres a bigger chance in society of women having kids at home and also from a security point of view women can feel vunerable, just sayin like

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

"Your house, your life your choice; do as you wish; if people don't want to meet you because of it then there will be people who accept it and you can meet those who are more tolerant.

There are double standards on here when it comes to accommodating (what a surprise); a lady doesn't and its for her safety; a guy doesn't and he's married. Why people don't is up to them !

(I am not suggesting that you have double standards OP but some do)."

My thoughts exactly! My partner and I accomodate (even for our separate meets), a guy she sees regularly comes to our as he lives with his uncle (and their family don't know he's on here). That's not cause he's married, but his family would like him to (very traditional "have you thought of our grand kids" pressure)

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

"put your own take on it but.. theres a bigger chance in society of women having kids at home and also from a security point of view women can feel vunerable, just sayin like

By numbers (assuming this to be true), if we assume 1 man to 10 women (single parents with kids at home) how does that then tilt the balance of 1 single woman to 100 single guys (assumed figures or profiles) on Fabs?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So, on my profile it says 'cannot accommodate'- it does not matter why I put that in, that is just my preference.

If you were to arrange to meet me, hypothetically speaking, would you expect me to take you home? Would you be trying to persuade me it was ok because you were 'nice'?"

who's going to admit to being a pushy bugger on an open forum

your a single woman you get the same mail as me we already know most of the guys expect you to accommodate and will try and talk you into it even if they wouldn't admit it in public

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hang on, han gon.. so if am reading this right (the tone of the thread):

Women that can't/won't accomodate: their right and it should be respected.

Men that can't/won't accomodate: married

There is a bit of a shit deal dealt to single men on this subject by certain people on this site who think that if you're a single man you must be able to accomodate no matter what. And like the misguided person above said, its perceived by some that women should have all the power and control over a meet, as they are such a rare commodity you must jump through all the hoops.

However, statistically on this site men that cannot accommodate are more often than not married/attached. And that's just down to the numbers of men compared to any other group.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mobile numbers can be changed easily but if they turn out to be a nutter, stalker or blackmailer an address is harder to change and once is too many times. Don't accomadate unless you really want to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Men that can't/won't accomodate: married?"

Nobody said life is fair! also nobody said hotels were not an option.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"who's going to admit to being a pushy bugger on an open forum"

If I was on a non social meet then before we met the location should be sorted, be that our address or xyz hotel address. so pressure shouldn't ever happen.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Your house, your life your choice; do as you wish; if people don't want to meet you because of it then there will be people who accept it and you can meet those who are more tolerant.

There are double standards on here when it comes to accommodating (what a surprise); a lady doesn't and its for her safety; a guy doesn't and he's married. Why people don't is up to them !

(I am not suggesting that you have double standards OP but some do)."

I would not expect a guy to take me home first time either. Not saying it has never happened - stating a preference is not the same as making an informed choice. Nor is it a 'hard and fast' rule for future meets, just the first one. I have changed my preference recently, having met people I would not want in my home - ever!

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By *riskynriskyCouple
over a year ago

Essex.

There was a similar thread a while back. A woman told how after having a guy back to hers, a year later he turned up looking for a shag... Scarey and potentially very embarrassing...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I would arrange a hotel room as I think for your comfort and safety as hotel would be best.

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By *inecrestMan
over a year ago

West Yorks

Some women I've met prefer to travel for meets, as they feel more comfortable not giving away their home address. Others feel more comfortable meeting on home territory. As one woman I met said: "At least I know the bed linen will be clean."

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

"Its quite simply your choice whether you choose to accommodate or not, if people wish to jump to the wrong conclusions then so be it.

Do whatever you feel comfortable doing and enjoy yourself, your not here for other peoples justification

well said

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By *opping_candyWoman
over a year ago

West Yorkshire

"So, on my profile it says 'cannot accommodate'- it does not matter why I put that in, that is just my preference.

If you were to arrange to meet me, hypothetically speaking, would you expect me to take you home? Would you be trying to persuade me it was ok because you were 'nice'?"

Just had similar...recently updated my profile, it says I can't accommodate, yet after exchanging just a couple of messages with a local guy he has invited himself around and said he assumed I would make an exception.

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

"Don't be persuaded it's your choice and that should be respected 100% xx"

This... Keep safe... I'm post stalker and you do what YOU feel is right for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So, on my profile it says 'cannot accommodate'- it does not matter why I put that in, that is just my preference.

If you were to arrange to meet me, hypothetically speaking, would you expect me to take you home? Would you be trying to persuade me it was ok because you were 'nice'?"

No but if we both clicked and wanted a meet, there's always a hotel half-way between if coming to ours wasn't an option

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fabs is a life i like to live outside my palace.

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By *sagent81Man
over a year ago

Leeds

No because it says you can't accommodate.

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

I normally invite round as I do accomodate, this way if the prospect can't travel then it opens up the option if she/they prefer if I came to them. Anything else would have to be negotiated.

What I don't get are the ones that can't/won't accomodate yet can't/won't travel either.. but more than happy to be taken to a club (for a meet) where they go off and play with others (Who they haven't arranged to meet), and then hope to be taken home afterwards (but not even walked to her door).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So, on my profile it says 'cannot accommodate'- it does not matter why I put that in, that is just my preference.

If you were to arrange to meet me, hypothetically speaking, would you expect me to take you home? Would you be trying to persuade me it was ok because you were 'nice'?"

No I would not. It would be my place or a hotel - assuming you would want to play. Simples!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks. I have been teetering on the point of being persuaded otherwise but my instincts were to say no."

Stick to your guns. Also as you have done already trust your gut instincts.

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