FabSwingers.com forum: Cross dressing friend looks like me.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Okie dokes, so a few weeks ago, my brothers best friend since high school came out to him as gay and revealed the fact that he also likes to cross dress on an extremely regular basis..

My brother, obviously was very shocked by this as he had no clue or seen any signs of this throughout their twenty years of friendship.

The thing that is a bit odd, his friend who has been doing this for the past five years with other friends and has built an online fan base; has been trying to the best of his ability to imitate me...

He has a wig and styles it just like my own hair, wears his makeup like me, dresses like me and has even tried his hardest to act like me and copy my mannerisms. All of this he has admitted to.

He actually has it all pretty much down to a T!

I'm not upset with this, feel flattered actually, but don't know how I should feel, if anything....

My brother has actually asked me if I'd mind considering changing my look completely now as it's too strange for my brother to deal with... I just don't know if I should consider it or not...

It's really uncanny the resemblance between the pair of us now....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe the three of you need to sit down together

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe the three of you need to sit down together "

My brother is actually arranging a meeting with professional support to help his friend understand how he feels.

I don't want to get involved at this point cause from my understanding, the friend is extremely embarrassed and upset about me knowing, and I really don't want to cause any more upset not knowing how fragile his state of mind really is right now...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take him shopping... Find new style..

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By *ctaviusStuntMan
over a year ago

plymouth

If they look like you are they bi and looking to meet ?

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By *isandreTV/TS
over a year ago

Durham

This is interesting and very flattering.

I think those of us who are serious about this with some degree of gender dysphoria do look at girls we admire and try to copy them.

If you think about it, most women do that actually, though often it is celebs and models rather than friends. The fashion and womens magazine industry wouldn't be as huge as it is if that weren't true.

It is a bit unusual to copy one person so completely though, but don't forget we have to learn much more than fashion sense. Body language, grace, make up etc is something we have to also grapple with. Real women get lessons from pre teens age.

Does she actually suit your look? It may be that she has tried other styles, wigs etc but they don't work. Or it may be that she hasn't yet and may in time find her own style.

The suggestion of taking her shopping is a wonderful one. Go to a wig shop with her. Book a M.A.C. makeover together. Have a nice time browsing, having coffee etc.

I'd have loved that. Instead I had to learn it all on my own, but I did steal from half a dozen women I knew quite well and admired (and fancied).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My female best friend used to copy my elder sister like that. A lot of women do it,he's seen how you look and likes it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow, If i were you I'd be so flattered, but yeah I'd get him to talk to his friend, and definitely just tell the frind you're flattered but maybe he should find his own style as it's a bit odd for you. All the same you got a new shopping buddy! :P

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for all the responses..

I think though, I'll give it a little time so my brother has had time to accept this situation before I start giving makeup tips and going shopping.

When I first learned about our friend, I was so genuinely chuffed that he was able to embrace something which he had so obviously suppressed for many years. I had already been looking out dresses to pass on...

Just hope things work out and it isn't a too traumatising experience for all involved...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This is interesting and very flattering.

I think those of us who are serious about this with some degree of gender dysphoria do look at girls we admire and try to copy them.

Does she actually suit your look? It may be that she has tried other styles, wigs etc but they don't work. Or it may be that she hasn't yet and may in time find her own style.

The suggestion of taking her shopping is a wonderful one. Go to a wig shop with her. Book a M.A.C. makeover together. Have a nice time browsing, having coffee etc.

I'd have loved that. Instead I had to learn it all on my own, but I did steal from half a dozen women I knew quite well and admired (and fancied)."

Thank you for you input. I do feel genuinely flattered and really hope that I can do our friend justice.

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By *isandreTV/TS
over a year ago

Durham

You're welcome. He's very lucky to know someone with your attitude, not to mention obvious style

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think its very unfair of your brother to ask you to change to make him feel more comfortable.

your brother obviously has some issues with your mutual friends lifestyle choice.

my best mate at college came out as gay a few years after we left.

its his choice, i wished him all the best.

he is now happy and living with a really nice guy in Sweden.

if your brother is any form of mate, he will embrace it and help him through the years ahead.

and kudos to you for taking it in your stride.

i know a lot of people that would be freaked out by knowing they have a tribute act out there lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If he has put that much effort in then he's not a cd. He's definately tv perhaps even transexual. It seems you are taking this better then your brother considering how he's asked you to change your look and also is getting professional help for your friend.

What your friend needs is not professional support to understand how he feels but his friends of 20yrs to stay exactly that his friends so that he can talk to them about how he feels. As already been said it's tough for us guys who like to dress to learn the basics (I was lucky I had an understanding wife to teach me) although I made my own style perhaps he just admired you that much.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Okay, I think I may have cast an unfair shadow on my brother here.

My brother has not shunned, disowned or judged his friend through any of this.

He's concerned and worried about his friend because of issues surrounding and involving this. As with everything, there is a lot more to this than even I am allowed to know, which is why my brother is paying for help for his friend. Some times, professional involvement is needed.

I'm actually so proud of my brother for the way in which he has reacted to all of this. It really could have went the other way!

As for my brother asking me to change my look, I don't actually blame him. He seen a website with his friend in some rather explicit and provocative situations and poses, dressed and looking very similar to his little sister. That alone must have been extremely awkward for my brother...

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I think we all base our 'look' on a person, or more usually persons. Mine are a model called Milena Velba and a girl I used to work with. However, she has taken it a lot further than most girlys. Presumably because she seems you as the epitome of being a woman.

Taking her shopping and encouraging her to spread her wings would be a big bonus for her and perhaps help out.

I like the online fan club bit

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