FabSwingers.com forum: Advice for students?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hey there, thanks for clicking on here whether it be that you're in the same boat as me, or just helping out.

Basically, in short, I thought it may be a good idea to ask you guys and girls with experience what the best advice for swinging/meetups on this site, or in general, is. How to approach people in the best manner on here; what kind of things we could do to 'dip our toes', so to speak.

Personally I'm a slightly more shy and reserved person so wouldn't want to go to a social right away, but for other younger guys or girls reading this - feel free to give advice, no matter what.

Thank you, it is much appreciated!

Harry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are articulate and have a cock, you will do well on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the ONLY problem i can see is something you can do nothing about.

your age.

this shite is generally for people that are much older than yourself, and thusly have kids your age or older, and to a lot that would be distasteful.

there are, however, those that seek young lads to corrupt and ruin lol, these are the ladies you should be looking for, if you are brave enough lol

also, there seems to be many young ladies here too.

how genuine or what ages they are looking for, i have no idea, we tend not to get involved with them.

i will ask you the same question i always ask young guys that come on here.

why?

why arent you out with your student mates, meeting people in pubs and clubs and getting it that way?

for the hard work you are going to have to put in on here, that would be the route i personally would take.

either way, best of british to you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you!

I definitely get that this seems to be a place for slightly older people. I have been replied to/contacted by people, but obviously not in great numbers. I know part of that is due to the fact I'm just a guy - so not overly worried about that!

In resonse to yohr question:

I do go to pubs and such occasionally (not much of a clubber myself), although my kindnof group of friends aren't really into this whole malarkay. I'd maybe be looked down on a tad, if that makes sense. I'm not ashamed nor should be or this kind of behaviour either on the scene or on the site - this is just the sitch with my particular group! I do agree that for those who want to, pubs and clubs are a pretty good outlet (even more so if you're attractive!). A lot of the time clubs invite the whole 'one-night-stand' scenario. Whilst that's fine too it's not really my cup of tea. I like to chat a little and am open to the possibility of an ongoing thing.

Whilst I'm by no means antisocial, I'm a little shyer and more reserved than a lot. On here, most people are very direct with what they want which is a nice change. Knowing that so-and-so is looking for this, and not just a fuck'n go is useful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well all i will say is good luck to you.

there are those on here that are just after fuck n go, but some that are after a little more.

that said, the whole pub and lub thing doesnt push the one night thing, thats more the people that do it, rather than the environment.

there is nothing stopping you having something ongoing with someone you meet in a pub you know lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yes yes, I agree. I just think there are less barriers here. I wouldn't personally go alone to pubs to try and pick up people, but that's just me - not my age people as a whole!

Also another thing I forgot to mention is the fact I'm looking to try something with a couple - but in day-to-day life, I wouldn't know how to even go about findinga pair that'd be into that! It seems easier to 'advertise' on here to let people know you're cool with that. I can't imagine a young guy approaching a slightly older couple in a pub or something being too well received!

Thanks again

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Yes yes, I agree. I just think there are less barriers here. I wouldn't personally go alone to pubs to try and pick up people, but that's just me - not my age people as a whole!

Thanks again"

You seem to have thought it all through and I agree with what you're saying what you're after might be fairly tricky to find on a night out. I also think that if someone is looking to gain experience and try out some fantasies picking someone up in a nightclub is a pretty hit and miss way to go about it.

You asked for younger people to respond and I'm afraid that I'm only younger than Methuselah himself but in general I'd say stick with it, be patient and don't make this the be all and end all. Good luck and stay safe

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think I may have phrased my original post badly. I'm all for older people replying as they're the ones with all the experience! I just meant that they were also fine with answering however they like for OTHER young people who may be viewing this thread. Sorrybfor the confusion

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I think I may have phrased my original post badly. I'm all for older people replying as they're the ones with all the experience! I just meant that they were also fine with answering however they like for OTHER young people who may be viewing this thread. Sorrybfor the confusion

Lol don't apologise.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" Lol don't apologise.

Well, only polite to do so (...even if it is only myself I'm shooting in the foot with that phrasing!)

Thank you for that input. Wouldn't have noticed otherwise.

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By *atty_mooMan
over a year ago

Bournemouth

Just wanted to say to the OP, you sound a lot like me when I was growing up, still am to be honest. Never into the whole Pub/Club Scene and also used to be on the shy side. I think this cost me quite a bit, as I was considered good looking by the ladies, but always felt uncomfortable in social gatherings, so never did much about it. If I had a resource such as 'fab' in those days I would have definitely signed up.

Just carry on what you are doing, sooner or later someone will be in touch.

By the way, Ladies in their 30s and 40s are awesome, I have always had a soft spot for this age range even when I was your age.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a young man on here early last year with a similar problem to you, student/age. Similar pics too. Similar advice was given about going to clubs, but he didn't want to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you just need to either go to a social or a club.

even if you are not an extrovert there comes a time in anyone's life when you just have to gird your loins, talk yourself into it and just go for it. win or lose, but just go for it. it's like jumping into cold water. everything you know is telling you not too and that you won't like it, but sometimes you just have to, so get on with it!

try bghs. you can just go for a soak and dip your toe in the water, literally and figuratively. You don't even have to talk to anyone there, just go to relax and check out the scene

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

To get out of our comfort zones is part of what life is all about. It helps us to grow, explore, find what we may like, as well as keep ourselves from stagnating. If you know you are shy, then find some others that you would feel good being around. We could visit places with you, etc. If youre in a group, you are more likely to feel energised, as well as helped into social situations. At some point we just have to become actors, acting as if we are somewhat different. It is not about being false, but experimenting with our behaviour. The more we do something, the more proficient we become. Eventually we are the new self, with more behavioural choices. It can take some guts, but definitely is worth doing. As a student, it is no barrier to our swinging, unless we are broke. People love all ages on here, it is just about patience and finding the right matches. Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks to the last few people who have replied.

I am not totally against going to a club, social or any of that kinda thing (have considered bghs thanks!) - just wouldn't do it often.

I'm not too sure of the etiquette of these kinds of places, am sure different ones are different, but would appreciate a vague explanation of what it's like as I'm unsure what to expect. Are single guys frowned upon?? Haha.

Might go with someone to try out, but baby steps first!

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By *extoysareusCouple
over a year ago

kinky heaven

Have you asked the student union official?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I wasn't aware Student Union's handled with this kind of thing! Might look for info, but probably wouldn't ask in person - too embarrassed! Good idea though.

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By *extoysareusCouple
over a year ago

kinky heaven

"I wasn't aware Student Union's handled with this kind of thing! Might look for info, but probably wouldn't ask in person - too embarrassed! Good idea though."

What you face is no different to what other people face student or not.

I honestly thought you were going to ask if any swing clubs offer nus discount.

But I am sure there are some good student councillors.

have you tried the student room website.

Lots of students asking loads of questions about anything.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hahaha, no no!

That thought never occurred to me. NUS discount did give me a chuckle though.

I think you're right though. I just chose 'student' to describe me in the title of this thread as usually, it implies someone is pretty young.

I have briefly looked at it. Lots of threads on there aren't too active but there are a couple of decent ones. Wanted to ask here as I kind of want to get in the swing of things with women/couples older than me - but there are less of them on there to listen to advice from!

Thanksss

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By *indys loverCouple
over a year ago

Stratford on avon

we went to the BBB a month or so ago and noticed quite a few 'younger' folk there , on asking I was told that a uni from not a far had a 'FetSoc' and this was an outing for them ,,,,,, they seemed to be enjoying them selves

so to the OP have a look and see if the uni has a FetSoc

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By *extoysareusCouple
over a year ago

kinky heaven

"we went to the BBB a month or so ago and noticed quite a few 'younger' folk there , on asking I was told that a uni from not a far had a 'FetSoc' and this was an outing for them ,,,,,, they seemed to be enjoying them selves

so to the OP have a look and see if the uni has a FetSoc"

Exactly if you are in a good student location and have an active student union or social there are normally clubs for everyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just wanted to say to the OP, you sound a lot like me when I was growing up, still am to be honest. Never into the whole Pub/Club Scene and also used to be on the shy side. I think this cost me quite a bit, as I was considered good looking by the ladies, but always felt uncomfortable in social gatherings, so never did much about it. If I had a resource such as 'fab' in those days I would have definitely signed up.

Just carry on what you are doing, sooner or later someone will be in touch.

By the way, Ladies in their 30s and 40s are awesome, I have always had a soft spot for this age range even when I was your age."

Total agree, esp the first part.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

so to the OP have a look and see if the uni has a FetSoc"

Unfortunately my University has none quite like that! We do havetonnes of societies (150+?) and of course I'm part of a few, but the only ones to do with sexuality are not quite that in particular. Think more about female empowerment, LGBTQ etc! The kind of things you may expect in Brighton, haha. All fine, but not for fetishes or that kinda thing. No worries though!

Not sure what BBB is but assuming it's a place

I do feel as if there'd be avenues to explore somewhat though... So you never know!

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