FabSwingers.com forum: How do I handle this?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Last night I contacted a couple from my area, I had avoided them for a while as I had my suspicions that I could be working with the husband. Still I decided bull by the horns and all that, sent them a wink and a message.

They came back straight away asking for a face pic I duly complied. Only to receive a message back saying I know you and describing my job. They wouldn't tell me who they were and wouldn't provide a face pic or name.

So how do I handle this at work now. Bearing in mind I am very well know (at work) and have a key role?

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

If you had your suspicions that you knew the guy then isn't it likely that it is who you thought it was?

Im guessing that if you went ahead and messaged them anyway you knew there was a risk and you didnt think it was too much of an issue?

Id just leave it at that and carry on as normal. If they are on here too they probably dont want to make a big drama out of it themselves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Last night I contacted a couple from my area, I had avoided them for a while as I had my suspicions that I could be working with the husband. Still I decided bull by the horns and all that, sent them a wink and a message.

So how do I handle this at work now. Bearing in mind I am very well know (at work) and have a key role?"

if they won't share who they are perhaps they are concerned about their own privacy too? perhaps having your status update as it is indicates to them that you're less discreet than they appear to be trying to be?

i imagine if it comes out at work, as a single guy looking for NSA sex on a site such as this can be laughed off unless you're either the boss or not quite as single as your profile suggests...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is one of the main reasons I have no, 0, nada pictures of myself on here and never will so I can only ever have the misfortune of meeting someone I know when turning up at their home, and it's too late for both parties by that time

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Looks like they playing with you now.. Bit silly contacting them really..

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

2 ways

attack or defense

attack will alienate you. i.e saying well this is their username on x site

defense: say youre a single guy and have been a swinger for a while, brush it off

and if it continues - refer to attack

Better to smile it off and laugh about it if approached I think.

If people think you are vulnerable about it, they wont let it die

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is one of the main reasons I have no, 0, nada pictures of myself on here and never will so I can only ever have the misfortune of meeting someone I know when turning up at their home, and it's too late for both parties by that time

"
I doubt you'd be invited to anyone's home without swapping face pics first

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

try and forget it and act as if nothings happened. We were contacted by a colleague of mine, I don't know if he knows who I am as we blocked him as soon as we saw his face. I behave towards him as I did before he contacted us I suspect these people will do the same.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah I am as single as my profile sounds but have a key role where I work with every person needing to see me at some point or another

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By *eryCuriousCouple2012Couple
over a year ago

Funville

I wouldn't worry about it; they are on here for the same reason and if it does come out at work then you could simply point out how did they know...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What's the phrase

If you have a skeleton in your closet you'd be better off taking it out and teaching it how to dance.

If you were that worried you'd not have sent them a face pic, now you have, you've opened the door which can't be closed. You're better off brushing it off and not caring that they know. What exactly is the worst that could happen?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just Laugh it off and offer them a Verification

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wouldn't worry about it; they are on here for the same reason and if it does come out at work then you could simply point out how did they know...

This!

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By *uy4couplesMan
over a year ago

south kent

surly they have some profile picture of them both in, maybe tattoos or some distinctive markings,

so when you have a one to one meeting with them like you say you do, you might be able to twig who it is,

i know where your coming from as i had the same problem about 8 years ago, and at the time every one was up for redundancies at work , so he wasnt there long after it happened and never seen him since

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So how do I handle this at work now. Bearing in mind I am very well know (at work) and have a key role?"

He didn't share with you who he was...this could be for two reason's, either he perceives he has as much to lose as you, or he's messing with you.

In my opinion I really think the best solution is to forget about it. Ifit's the first one, it won't come up in conversation again.

If its the second, your lack of concern will infuriate him and eventually will say or do something to let you know who it is. Then you're on equal terms.

Question, what's the worst thing that could happen if your work colleagues found our you had a profile on a swingers site? Where I work it got a bit of a chuckle, but then nothing.

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

"try and forget it and act as if nothings happened. We were contacted by a colleague of mine, I don't know if he knows who I am as we blocked him as soon as we saw his face. I behave towards him as I did before he contacted us I suspect these people will do the same. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Send them a message saying it's ok I know who you are, smiley face and but since I'm a gentleman I never wanted to say.

Then block.

Your not threatening, but you are making the point that they were being rude saying who you were without revealing who they were. You are implying that you too can play the blackmail game without revealing you don't have any info. Blocking stops the argument carrying on

Good luck

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By *_MariusMan
over a year ago

Currently Faraway

I would suggest to you, try to act as if nothing happened. Keep quiet. They wouldn't really speak out if they are in the same workplace...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They have / are probably reading all these messages as they are posted. .so they know how you feel about the situation !!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for all the advice. I have blocked them to avoid any prying into each other's swinging life and intend to carry on as normal at work then front it out if something is said.

Again thank you all

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Thanks for all the advice. I have blocked them to avoid any prying into each other's swinging life and intend to carry on as normal at work then front it out if something is said.

Again thank you all"

Good decision. Its always a bit horrible when something like this happens but in a fortnight you'll be laughing about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you never said whether they refue

sed to meet you because you work with the male partner?

ateotd you suspected you worked with him, but your horniness forced you to think you could bone his missus.

they havent done anything wrong, in my mind, as you were the one that knowingly contacted someone you know in the vanilla world, and knew it could cause you some considerable discomfort if anyone else knew about your out of work activities, as it were.

i would also suggest that blocking the couple could well incur their ire as it was you that contacted them in the first place.

try not to mention it to anyone at work.

brush it under the carpet and hope no one else mentions it

try to keep your libido under control in the future and only message those that wont lead to you losing you job or anything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

easy way is to go round theirs and murder them lol.. sorry.. seriously i'd not get worried about it. it's done now, but you know better in future. everyone makes mistakes including me believe it or not. besides, if they were going to gossip about you to others about swinging, they're opening themselves to gossip too.

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By *errible_TwoCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

We were contacted by someone I went to school with and how is on my Facebook as a friend I told him who I was and we were all happy about it and have tried to sort out a meet I know he's an ok guy and will respect me so it is a bonus in our eyes but if your his boss then I would just act normal toll someone says something then say well your there too each to their own I don't think you will hear from them at work they are obviously too embarrassed about their lifestyle

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Oops they must have got him

Joking apart I think him leaving and possibly changing name is the most sensible. That way he can change his area and details so he wont be recognised...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So how do I handle this at work now. Bearing in mind I am very well know (at work) and have a key role?"

I think the best solution is to maybe leave the site until things calm dow...., OI! Where you going? Not yet, wait until i've given my advice first!

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