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By *trawberryblonde12 OP   Man
4 weeks ago

Manningtree

On average if I sent 10 messages out to people in my surrounding area the I might be very lucky to have someone read and ignore that message, let alone message me back. Is this normal? I’ve had three meets in two years which just seems pretty poor, I must be doing something wrong.

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By *WB85Man
4 weeks ago

Staffordshire

I was in a similar position in my earlier days.

I can only suggest that when I made more effort, made my messages more personal to the lady I was messaging I was more successful.

Only message those that you have matching preferences, not the ones who want different things but are stunning.

Find a way to make your message match something in their bio, it shows you took the effort to read it.

It took my way over a year to realise that it was me any my approach that was wrong.

Good luck my friend.

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By *aomilatteCouple
4 weeks ago

Midlands

Three meets in two years from Fab is not bad at all, it's three more than us. Our only meets have been in a club.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
4 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

I don't think there's even ten people in the local area I'd be actively interested in 😂

It depends what and who you're messaging OP. Not everyone is into everyone 💜

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By *ackformore100Man
4 weeks ago

Tin town


"On average if I sent 10 messages out to people in my surrounding area the I might be very lucky to have someone read and ignore that message, let alone message me back. Is this normal? I’ve had three meets in two years which just seems pretty poor, I must be doing something wrong."

Set your expectations very very low. It could be that going to your local social club pub gym shopping centre.. Old school... might be more successful.. Although depends how you choose to define success

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By *anan1010Man
4 weeks ago

Newcastle City Centre


"I was in a similar position in my earlier days.

I can only suggest that when I made more effort, made my messages more personal to the lady I was messaging I was more successful.

Only message those that you have matching preferences, not the ones who want different things but are stunning.

Find a way to make your message match something in their bio, it shows you took the effort to read it.

It took my way over a year to realise that it was me any my approach that was wrong.

Good luck my friend. "

Hey bro and sorry op for pinching this but I’ve made a similar post today and getting messages out there is tough

I suppose if you don’t ask you don’t get but is there any way you could coach me in sending messages?

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By *issmorganWoman
4 weeks ago

Yorks


"I was in a similar position in my earlier days.

I can only suggest that when I made more effort, made my messages more personal to the lady I was messaging I was more successful.

Only message those that you have matching preferences, not the ones who want different things but are stunning.

Find a way to make your message match something in their bio, it shows you took the effort to read it.

It took my way over a year to realise that it was me any my approach that was wrong.

Good luck my friend.

Hey bro and sorry op for pinching this but I’ve made a similar post today and getting messages out there is tough

I suppose if you don’t ask you don’t get but is there any way you could coach me in sending messages? "

Nobody can or should coach you in sending messages.It needs to be your words etc, not what you think someone wants to hear.

All I'll say is always read a profile, only message the ones you like and are a fit for & be polite.

Make your profile the best it can be, as most of us look there first.

Good luck.

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By *ltimateGemWoman
4 weeks ago

Nottingham

I've been on the site for quite a long time. What I've found is the very new people that have never been here actually have an attitude. The attitude, and this is not every man, is that "these women are up for it and I just need to send a few messages, plus a picture of my cock and they'll be gagging for me!!" Once they realize that this is not the case then it all turns on the woman, that "there are a lot of ignorant women on the site", "that nobody wants to have fun", or "what kind of site is this I thought it was a sex site. Why am I not having sex?" The thing is to act like you are meeting somebody for the first time face to face. What would you say to that woman face to face? You certainly wouldn't say in a public place "let's go for a fuck, how big are your tits? How big is your fanny?" Sadly this is what seems to be happening. Some men think that the only way to get to a woman on this site is to be crude and rude and to act like 14 year old boys. The key is to be yourself and to act as though you are meeting somebody face to face.

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By *its_and_TiramisuCouple
4 weeks ago

North Somerset

There are thousands of single men on the site.

Women won't want to meet them all.

One thing that always helps us make a decision is when we see whether a man can accomodate. It's obviously someone's personal choice to accomodate or not, but when we're looking for single men if we see someone that can't we'll likely move on. There's simply too many cheating guys on the site and that's a big red flag to us, when there's plenty of men who can.

Most of the time we won't even be looking to meet at theirs as we'll meet at my place, a hotel or a club.

But it's a key factor in our decision making and that of many people we know. 🤷‍♂️

Obi

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By *viatrixCouple
4 weeks ago

Gatwick

Having checked out your profile, OP, I honestly don’t know what to say!

Usually I’d say if people don’t reply it is as simple as they’re not attracted to you/your profile… but in this case they’d have to go to Specsavers!!

Let’s put it this way- if you messaged me, I’d reply 😉

Blooming distance though

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By *eroLondonMan
4 weeks ago

Mayfair

Yes, it's normal. Most women will look at the sender's profile before opening the message, if at all, before replying, if at all. A profile has to be appealing in a variety of ways.

On the rare occasion when I message women I usually go further afield; I don't think there are enough women in my local area that match my preferences or criteria.

I would say the responses outside London are more favourable than in my local area.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
4 weeks ago

Reading


"I was in a similar position in my earlier days.

I can only suggest that when I made more effort, made my messages more personal to the lady I was messaging I was more successful.

Only message those that you have matching preferences, not the ones who want different things but are stunning.

Find a way to make your message match something in their bio, it shows you took the effort to read it.

It took my way over a year to realise that it was me any my approach that was wrong.

Good luck my friend. "

Well done you. When you know better you do better.

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By *trawberryblonde12 OP   Man
4 weeks ago

Manningtree

Interesting takes and responses, which I very much appreciate. Although there is a lot of assumption that I am only ever writing the bare minimum, feel that I’m owed it and am writing generically, none of which are the case and I’m pretty confident in my social abilities, boundaries and etiquette.

I was just interested to hear what the mean experience factor is like for folks on here after a fair amount of disappointment.

It is a superficial highly guarded place that is highly saturated at the end of the day which can’t really be helped.

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By *trawberryblonde12 OP   Man
4 weeks ago

Manningtree

Sorry to hear that and best of luck to you. Sounds like clubs might be the way forward here.

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By *oftkittyWoman
4 weeks ago

Nottingham


"On average if I sent 10 messages out to people in my surrounding area the I might be very lucky to have someone read and ignore that message, let alone message me back. Is this normal? I’ve had three meets in two years which just seems pretty poor, I must be doing something wrong."

You say youve had 3 meets in 2 years. But this profile is 3 months old. Its a new profile it will take time to get meets when you have a new profile. Try going to a club or social event to get some veris that might help you. People are cautious on here and most dont like to meet unverified new profiles.

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By *ore_Than_VanillaMan
4 weeks ago

Cheddar


"On average if I sent 10 messages out to people in my surrounding area the I might be very lucky to have someone read and ignore that message, let alone message me back. Is this normal? I’ve had three meets in two years which just seems pretty poor, I must be doing something wrong."

Gawd, I only fancy 4 fab members in the whole of the uk

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By *trawberryblonde12 OP   Man
4 weeks ago

Manningtree

[Removed by poster at 11/09/26 16:16:40]

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By *trawberryblonde12 OP   Man
4 weeks ago

Manningtree

Also a good point that I hadn’t fully considered, thanks.

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By *w funwifeWoman
4 weeks ago

near taunton

no reply = simply not interested

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By *dinburghWomanWoman
4 weeks ago

Edinburgh


"I've been on the site for quite a long time. What I've found is the very new people that have never been here actually have an attitude. The attitude, and this is not every man, is that "these women are up for it and I just need to send a few messages, plus a picture of my cock and they'll be gagging for me!!" Once they realize that this is not the case then it all turns on the woman, that "there are a lot of ignorant women on the site", "that nobody wants to have fun", or "what kind of site is

this I thought it was a sex site. Why am I not having sex?" The thing is to act like you are meeting somebody for the first time face to face. What would you say to that woman face to face? You certainly wouldn't say in a public place "let's go for a fuck, how big are your tits? How big is your fanny?" Sadly this is what seems to be happening. Some men think that the only way to get to a woman on this site is to be crude and rude and to act like 14 year old boys. The key is to be yourself and to act as though you are meeting somebody face to face. "

This exactly

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By *estinysswingersCouple
4 weeks ago

Worsley

Pretty normal.

If we unlock single guys it gets pretty exhausting dealing with countless messages.

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By *ethot69Couple
4 weeks ago

Knowsley


"Pretty normal.

If we unlock single guys it gets pretty exhausting dealing with countless messages. "

Same. We make it as clear as possible that we'll pop a status update up if meeting men, so don't message. Makes no odds, still get loads, even some saying "read your profile, you sound my type!" - when clearly they haven't read a word.

All it results in is being ignored/deleted at best, blocked at worst.

We feel sorry for the genuine singles who read profiles and respect them as all this nonsense just makes couples/fems turn the single men option off.

But yes, that's why so many get ignored - fatigue basically.

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By *its_and_TiramisuCouple
4 weeks ago

North Somerset


"Pretty normal.

If we unlock single guys it gets pretty exhausting dealing with countless messages.

Same. We make it as clear as possible that we'll pop a status update up if meeting men, so don't message. Makes no odds, still get loads, even some saying "read your profile, you sound my type!" - when clearly they haven't read a word.

All it results in is being ignored/deleted at best, blocked at worst.

We feel sorry for the genuine singles who read profiles and respect them as all this nonsense just makes couples/fems turn the single men option off.

But yes, that's why so many get ignored - fatigue basically."

We don't block single men from messaging as like many couples we actively seek them.

It takes mere seconds to delete a message and/or block someone.

The fact that many messages look like they've been written by Jay from the Inbetweeners mid wank, or consist purely of an unimaginative 'hi' make the decision to delete easy.

Good messages seriously stand out, as do those that don't come with the common dick pic. But even a good message will get deleted if we're not interested in someone based on their profile.

Any message someone sends is always speculative. It's marketing. The same as junk mail or spam emails. It's never owed a reply and even if someone thinks that's rude then so be it.

Obi

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
4 weeks ago

Carlisle usually


"Interesting takes and responses, which I very much appreciate. Although there is a lot of assumption that I am only ever writing the bare minimum, feel that I’m owed it and am writing generically, none of which are the case and I’m pretty confident in my social abilities, boundaries and etiquette.

I was just interested to hear what the mean experience factor is like for folks on here after a fair amount of disappointment.

It is a superficial highly guarded place that is highly saturated at the end of the day which can’t really be helped."

It's good that you have confidence. Though perhaps it's worth acknowledging that social abilities and etiquette are context dependent.

If someone approaches me on here like I'd expect them to at a FemDomme event, they're no good to me. If someone approaches me at a FemDomme event as if it were online here, they're no good to me.

For sure there's plenty of people who are looking for a particular aesthetic when it comes to a place like this. But there's plenty who aren't. And to call it superficial and lacking in depth may be why you're not getting anywhere 💜

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By *rBruce101Man
4 weeks ago

Leicester

Calling women of 34 "older" probably isn't helping to be honest.

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By *eroLondonMan
4 weeks ago

Mayfair


"Calling women of 34 "older" probably isn't helping to be honest."

•

🤔.....?

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By *rBruce101Man
4 weeks ago

Leicester

[Removed by poster at 11/09/26 21:03:21]

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By *rBruce101Man
4 weeks ago

Leicester

[Removed by poster at 11/09/26 21:03:25]

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By *rBruce101Man
4 weeks ago

Leicester

I misread something in his profile. Ignore me.

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By *inkyandthebrain2023Couple
4 weeks ago

Cheshire


"On average if I sent 10 messages out to people in my surrounding area the I might be very lucky to have someone read and ignore that message, let alone message me back. Is this normal? I’ve had three meets in two years which just seems pretty poor, I must be doing something wrong."

Local couples and ladies might not want to engage with someone so close especially if its a more rural area. 3 meets in 2 years ain't bad if you dont go to clubs or socials

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By *harAndBryCouple
4 weeks ago

Downham Market


"On average if I sent 10 messages out to people in my surrounding area the I might be very lucky to have someone read and ignore that message, let alone message me back. Is this normal? I’ve had three meets in two years which just seems pretty poor, I must be doing something wrong."

Not sure if you're close enough, but if you messaged us then we'd reply (unless it was a really shit message)

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By *ickle_my_pickleWoman
4 weeks ago

nosy town

Must just be your local area. I'd reply if we were local

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By *wendolineFoxWoman
4 weeks ago

Chester

As the honourable correspondents above have mentioned, people will check out a profile before looking at a message.

You’ve written your profile in a way so that it’s very easy for someone to rule themselves out based on your stated preferences. (What is ‘good chat’? How laid back are you? No idea, and can’t be bothered finding out.). Maybe that’s the point but then you can’t complain when nobody replies.

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By *oiluvfunMan
4 weeks ago

Penrith


"On average if I sent 10 messages out to people in my surrounding area the I might be very lucky to have someone read and ignore that message, let alone message me back. Is this normal? I’ve had three meets in two years which just seems pretty poor, I must be doing something wrong."

My last meet through Fab was in November, and that was my only meet last year.

I was in Birmingham June, for an annual conference, staying two nights in Malmaison, so right in the city centre. I changed my location to Birmingham, and posted regular status updates, in the hope that the locals might notice me. I messaged 30 profiles in the run up to my weekend stay. All carefully selected as potential, genuine matches, and received……..not a single reply. 🫣

So I went to the V2V club in Nuneaton instead (veris on my profile).

In a nutshell OP; don’t feel special, we’re all suffering in this shit show together. 😋👍

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By *eautifulChaosWoman
3 weeks ago

-

I'd reply if we were local.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
3 weeks ago

Central

You may be doing nothing wrong. People view profiles often before the message. As most people are not mutually compatible with most other people, only a tiny minority get a reply physically, as it prevents their message filters working properly, if they do so. Plus the site instructions say no physical reply means no thanks

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By *orks and Scots girlCouple
3 weeks ago

leeds

You got verified 6 weeks ago.. some guys are on here for over a year with nothing to show, it’s called choices, stop being so needy and chill out

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By *18guyMan
3 weeks ago

LONDON

Advice saying to read the profile and respond appropriately are kinda ignoring the issue - most messages never get read. I have sent messages to people who are a great match and they never read the message but are still online saying they are looking to meet (and often complaining about how many messages they have) - go figure!

It’s easier to find someone in normal life than on here. I have had arrangements planned on here and then people go awol or suddenly block you. It’s rude and selfish. Just because people are sexually adventurous doesn’t stop them from being assholes.

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By *WB85Man
3 weeks ago

Staffordshire


"Advice saying to read the profile and respond appropriately are kinda ignoring the issue - most messages never get read. I have sent messages to people who are a great match and they never read the message but are still online saying they are looking to meet (and often complaining about how many messages they have) - go figure!

It’s easier to find someone in normal life than on here. I have had arrangements planned on here and then people go awol or suddenly block you. It’s rude and selfish. Just because people are sexually adventurous doesn’t stop them from being assholes."

They all get read, or a very high majority.

Mostly via email notifications.

Some just get marked as unread again.

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By *ear_TinkerbellCouple
3 weeks ago

The lost village


"Advice saying to read the profile and respond appropriately are kinda ignoring the issue - most messages never get read. I have sent messages to people who are a great match and they never read the message but are still online saying they are looking to meet (and often complaining about how many messages they have) - go figure!

It’s easier to find someone in normal life than on here. I have had arrangements planned on here and then people go awol or suddenly block you. It’s rude and selfish. Just because people are sexually adventurous doesn’t stop them from being assholes."

How is it rude to not being interested in someone? Just because you think you're a good match through the profile, doesnt mean they are attracted to you. No one has to meet someone else just because they are on here.

Tink

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By *aisyMayStarWoman
3 weeks ago

Brighton


"Advice saying to read the profile and respond appropriately are kinda ignoring the issue - most messages never get read. I have sent messages to people who are a great match and they never read the message but are still online saying they are looking to meet (and often complaining about how many messages they have) - go figure!

It’s easier to find someone in normal life than on here. I have had arrangements planned on here and then people go awol or suddenly block you. It’s rude and selfish. Just because people are sexually adventurous doesn’t stop them from being assholes."

Just because you think they are a great match for you, doesn’t mean they will think the same.

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By *18guyMan
3 weeks ago

LONDON

Yeah, funnily enough I know that. Still doesn’t take too much effort or manners to just say “no thanks “.

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By *18guyMan
3 weeks ago

LONDON

Really? Thanks for the insight

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By *ull of PuddinWoman
3 weeks ago

isle of munters


"Yeah, funnily enough I know that. Still doesn’t take too much effort or manners to just say “no thanks “."

If they reply they have to block otherwise by replying to you they've let you through the filters

It's not about manners, it's about fabmin

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By *aisyMayStarWoman
3 weeks ago

Brighton


"Yeah, funnily enough I know that. Still doesn’t take too much effort or manners to just say “no thanks “."

Who are you talking to? There is a reply and quote button.

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By *eroLondonMan
3 weeks ago

Mayfair


"...most messages never get read. I have sent messages to people who are a great match..."

A great match according to whom? The recipient might find nothing in common with you or any perceived compatibilities having read your profile (before even opening your message).


"...and they never read the message but are still online saying they are looking to meet (and often complaining about how many messages they have) - go figure!"

Most people are discerning. They are looking to meet with those who match their preferences and those who can give them chemistry, connection etc. Being online doesn't correlate to "I'll fuck anything with a pulse".


"It’s easier to find someone in normal life than on here. I have had arrangements planned on here and then people go awol or suddenly block you. It’s rude and selfish. Just because people are sexually adventurous doesn’t stop them from being assholes."

Perhaps you're the common denominator and you need to rethink your approach if you're experiencing the same unsatisfactory outcomes time and time again...?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
3 weeks ago

Carlisle usually


"Yeah, funnily enough I know that. Still doesn’t take too much effort or manners to just say “no thanks “."

Clearly more effort than they feel it's worth 💜

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By *rYoniMan
3 weeks ago

Essex ++


"Yeah, funnily enough I know that. Still doesn’t take too much effort or manners to just say “no thanks “."

Actually takes a lot of effort as you are sometimes one of hundreds. On my old couples account messages were constant if logged on. Life is too busy to type "no thanks" potentially hundreds of times especially as often that triggers a reply.

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By *enandJadeCouple
3 weeks ago

yeovil


"Yeah, funnily enough I know that. Still doesn’t take too much effort or manners to just say “no thanks “."

Omg! I used to have a single female profile on here and got hundreds of messages - and worked out how long it would take to send a ‘no thanks’ to each one. It worked out as hours!! And before you then counteract with suggesting I’m being ‘up myself’ or something, no I’m not. All single women get the same on here.

Also - even now on our couples profile, if we don’t block people who are of no interest, some of them message constantly - even if we don’t reply! It’s weird. I think they think we will eventually notice them if they keep on.

Honestly - it really annoys me guys acting like we’re rude when there is literally no choice other than to block. I’m not rude at all. Don’t be so offensive.

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By *WB85Man
3 weeks ago

Staffordshire


"Yeah, funnily enough I know that. Still doesn’t take too much effort or manners to just say “no thanks “.

Clearly more effort than they feel it's worth 💜"

Harsh, but so very true.

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By *rYoniMan
3 weeks ago

Essex ++


"Yeah, funnily enough I know that. Still doesn’t take too much effort or manners to just say “no thanks “.

Clearly more effort than they feel it's worth 💜

Harsh, but so very true. "

Have you got a spare hour or two every day to type no thanks and send a message more than hundred times? (and then deal with the inevitable replies)

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By *enandJadeCouple
3 weeks ago

yeovil


"Yeah, funnily enough I know that. Still doesn’t take too much effort or manners to just say “no thanks “.

Clearly more effort than they feel it's worth 💜

Harsh, but so very true.

Have you got a spare hour or two every day to type no thanks and send a message more than hundred times? (and then deal with the inevitable replies) "

Exactly! And then after you type ‘no thanks’, many guys are heartened by having any sort of response and then try to carry on the conversation.

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By *WB85Man
3 weeks ago

Staffordshire


"Yeah, funnily enough I know that. Still doesn’t take too much effort or manners to just say “no thanks “.

Clearly more effort than they feel it's worth 💜

Harsh, but so very true.

Have you got a spare hour or two every day to type no thanks and send a message more than hundred times? (and then deal with the inevitable replies) "

To be clear I wasn't saying people should reply.

No reply is a reply, just not the one people hoped for. I started on here focusing on our couples account so have first hand experience of what happens when you make the effort to say no.

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
3 weeks ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

It's just the nature of being a guy on a site centred around sex. It's about luck and numbers. On the one hand we are advised to compose unique personal sexy, witty, engaging messages. On the other hand it takes them too much effort to reply to each received message. When I was active in my earlier days on here, I probably sent 20 messages per day. It'd probably take me at least 3 weeks minimum to get any reply. And that reply may not even have converted into anything substantial.

My first ever meet on Fab was after I had sent a very simple opening one liner. It wasn't particularly clever or seductive. Just silly. I don't think there is any real rhyme or reason to it.

Sending in large volumes does tilt the odds in your favour, but your expectations would consequently naturally lean higher. I think it is best not to except much return at all. If you do find success, it's best to view it was a bonus.

I personally found dating apps to be more fruitful depending on what you are searching for. Although they do come with their own pitfalls too.

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By (user no longer on site)
3 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 17/09/26 16:04:04]

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By *ackformore100Man
3 weeks ago

Tin town

It's a funny old game saint

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By *udandBryanCouple
3 weeks ago

Boston

We get fed up of seeing men moaning that nobody ever replies - if you send faf, free now type messages or just say hi, chances are you WILL be ignored.

We reply to all sensible questions, as do many other couples, but not always to lazy, one word/line messages.

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By *ethot69Couple
3 weeks ago

Knowsley


"We get fed up of seeing men moaning that nobody ever replies - if you send faf, free now type messages or just say hi, chances are you WILL be ignored.

We reply to all sensible questions, as do many other couples, but not always to lazy, one word/line messages. "

Yep, and it doesn't help that 9 out of every 10 messages at the minimum haven't read a word of your profile before messaging.

In our view it's ignoring us first. You ignore us, we'll ignore you.

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By *aGaGagging for itCouple
3 weeks ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

Just because you think your a match with them, it doesn't mean that they think you match with what they are looking for.

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By *oiluvfunMan
3 weeks ago

Penrith


"It's just the nature of being a guy on a site centred around sex. It's about luck and numbers. On the one hand we are advised to compose unique personal sexy, witty, engaging messages. On the other hand it takes them too much effort to reply to each received message. When I was active in my earlier days on here, I probably sent 20 messages per day. It'd probably take me at least 3 weeks minimum to get any reply. And that reply may not even have converted into anything substantial.

My first ever meet on Fab was after I had sent a very simple opening one liner. It wasn't particularly clever or seductive. Just silly. I don't think there is any real rhyme or reason to it.

Sending in large volumes does tilt the odds in your favour, but your expectations would consequently naturally lean higher. I think it is best not to except much return at all. If you do find success, it's best to view it was a bonus.

I personally found dating apps to be more fruitful depending on what you are searching for. Although they do come with their own pitfalls too. "

Very similar to my experience of Fab mate, and with the comprehension of “if something isn’t working for you, change it”, I look outside of Fab, to find myself better respected as a human being, on sites which actually have ladies in them 😎👍

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By *ost SockMan
3 weeks ago

West Wales and Cardiff

I’ve been on Fab about 15 years. Since the early days, I’ve thought of messages as something to send only if you have that intangible feeling that the other person is someone you connect with on many levels.

IMO, being local to someone, liking their profile and/or feeling there’s a match with the basic criteria isn’t enough to justify sending one - there has to be that extra bit.

It does mean that I’ve sent less messages in a year (probably three or four at most) than many send in a fortnight! There lots of others ways to interact and connect through Fab though, and, overall, I’ve really enjoyed my time on here.

I’m not saying this is the only way, just the way that feels best for me .

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By *radually_RetiringMan
3 weeks ago

Bury

Not really worth messaging anyone, especially of the opposite sex.

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By *enandJadeCouple
3 weeks ago

yeovil

To any of you guys feeling sorry for yourselves because you get blocked or ignored - there is absolutely no point directing your bitterness towards the women and couples on here.

The people who are actually causing this state of affairs are the badly behaved single men who:

1 - Don’t bother to read profiles.

2 - Spam inboxes with dozens of messages ESPECIALLY when told ‘no thanks’ because to them any sort of response counts.

3 - Opens the communication with unsolicited dick pics.

4 - Send abuse when we aren’t interested.

5 - Send ridiculously low effort messages in the first place.

So go and have a go at them. They seem to make up a massive percentage of the site.

And at the end of the day, if you feel like Fab is that bad, that we’re all so bad mannered and that there aren’t even ‘real ladies’ on here then you really don’t need to be here.

Whining about it constantly isn’t a good look.

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By *rinceless PrincessWoman
3 weeks ago

(not meeting)


"To any of you guys feeling sorry for yourselves because you get blocked or ignored - there is absolutely no point directing your bitterness towards the women and couples on here.

The people who are actually causing this state of affairs are the badly behaved single men who:

1 - Don’t bother to read profiles.

2 - Spam inboxes with dozens of messages ESPECIALLY when told ‘no thanks’ because to them any sort of response counts.

3 - Opens the communication with unsolicited dick pics.

4 - Send abuse when we aren’t interested.

5 - Send ridiculously low effort messages in the first place.

So go and have a go at them. They seem to make up a massive percentage of the site.

And at the end of the day, if you feel like Fab is that bad, that we’re all so bad mannered and that there aren’t even ‘real ladies’ on here then you really don’t need to be here.

Whining about it constantly isn’t a good look. "

This but don’t forget 6- sends ridiculously detailed messages about what “they are going to do to you” without even considering consent or if the person reading said message is interested in that kind of thing.

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By *eroLondonMan
3 weeks ago

Mayfair


"To any of you guys feeling sorry for yourselves because you get blocked or ignored - there is absolutely no point directing your bitterness towards the women and couples on here.

The people who are actually causing this state of affairs are the badly behaved single men who:

1 - Don’t bother to read profiles.

2 - Spam inboxes with dozens of messages ESPECIALLY when told ‘no thanks’ because to them any sort of response counts.

3 - Opens the communication with unsolicited dick pics.

4 - Send abuse when we aren’t interested.

5 - Send ridiculously low effort messages in the first place.

So go and have a go at them. They seem to make up a massive percentage of the site.

And at the end of the day, if you feel like Fab is that bad, that we’re all so bad mannered and that there aren’t even ‘real ladies’ on here then you really don’t need to be here.

Whining about it constantly isn’t a good look.

This but don’t forget 6- sends ridiculously detailed messages about what “they are going to do to you” without even considering consent or if the person reading said message is interested in that kind of thing. "

•

I would probably smack her ⬆️ derrière with my 1937 edition of The Hobbit.

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By *rYoniMan
3 weeks ago

Essex ++


"To any of you guys feeling sorry for yourselves because you get blocked or ignored - there is absolutely no point directing your bitterness towards the women and couples on here.

The people who are actually causing this state of affairs are the badly behaved single men who:

1 - Don’t bother to read profiles.

2 - Spam inboxes with dozens of messages ESPECIALLY when told ‘no thanks’ because to them any sort of response counts.

3 - Opens the communication with unsolicited dick pics.

4 - Send abuse when we aren’t interested.

5 - Send ridiculously low effort messages in the first place.

So go and have a go at them. They seem to make up a massive percentage of the site.

And at the end of the day, if you feel like Fab is that bad, that we’re all so bad mannered and that there aren’t even ‘real ladies’ on here then you really don’t need to be here.

Whining about it constantly isn’t a good look.

This but don’t forget 6- sends ridiculously detailed messages about what “they are going to do to you” without even considering consent or if the person reading said message is interested in that kind of thing. "

The problem is men (and indeed couples to a lesser extent) can do everything right, do none of the bad things and still not get replies. It is just numbers and timing. Most ladies don't have the time to sift through all their messages most of the time.

And most people are not in the mode to meet or make new contacts most of the time. My ex-partner deleted my first message and didn't read my second a few weeks later. Third time lucky she was in mode to read messages and reply and meet fairly quickly. Essentially the same message three times but timing and luck on my side the third time.

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By *ousteau72Man
3 weeks ago

Wombourne

It's a numbers game where the odds are stacked against you due to the ratio of men to women.

Don't take it personal, just remember that it's a little bit like winning the lottery.

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By *ir and his Good GirlCouple
3 weeks ago

stevenage

I always make my good girl reply to messages it may not be straight away but she will when I say

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By *r SensualMan
3 weeks ago

London

It’s not a numbers game! I really wish people would stop saying this, because the “spray and pray” approach just adds to what’s already noisy inboxes.

Do you know what it IS about? Simply the timing of when your message is sent and whether the recipient finds you interesting. No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that, because guess what? You can’t control that.

The quicker you realise this, the less hung up and in your feelings you’ll be about it.

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By *eautyandthebeast86Couple
3 weeks ago

Somewhere in Norfolk ask :)

I just feel every day there is a different thread about this, people saying they never get reply’s but there are plenty of people that do. You can’t be for everyone and when you are the person someone’s looking for they will make it known, this isn’t instashag.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
3 weeks ago

Carlisle usually


"It’s not a numbers game! I really wish people would stop saying this, because the “spray and pray” approach just adds to what’s already noisy inboxes.

Do you know what it IS about? Simply the timing of when your message is sent and whether the recipient finds you interesting. No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that, because guess what? You can’t control that.

The quicker you realise this, the less hung up and in your feelings you’ll be about it."

Very this.

A numbers game only works if every supposed unit in the calculation behaves like a machine. If a salesman cold-calls 100 businesses, a certain percentage objectively need the software he is selling. But human connection doesn't work like that. You cannot force a statistical conversion rate on someone's personal boundaries, mood, taste, or standards.

A thoughtful, personalized message acts like a fast-pass. It cuts straight through the noise of the numbers because it shows actual intent, intelligence, and respect for your time.

When there's 98 spray and pray messages and two that actually have a genuine attempt to connect in a day, guess how many are going to be at least considered and get a response of more than "No"? And when there's just 100 spray and pray the next day, I'm not going to engage with any intent to progress because there's no-one better, I'll just delete the lot and wait for someone with an actual interest in myself rather than any viable hole to get in touch 💜

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By *r SensualMan
3 weeks ago

London


"It’s not a numbers game! I really wish people would stop saying this, because the “spray and pray” approach just adds to what’s already noisy inboxes.

Do you know what it IS about? Simply the timing of when your message is sent and whether the recipient finds you interesting. No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that, because guess what? You can’t control that.

The quicker you realise this, the less hung up and in your feelings you’ll be about it.

Very this.

A numbers game only works if every supposed unit in the calculation behaves like a machine. If a salesman cold-calls 100 businesses, a certain percentage objectively need the software he is selling. But human connection doesn't work like that. You cannot force a statistical conversion rate on someone's personal boundaries, mood, taste, or standards.

A thoughtful, personalized message acts like a fast-pass. It cuts straight through the noise of the numbers because it shows actual intent, intelligence, and respect for your time.

When there's 98 spray and pray messages and two that actually have a genuine attempt to connect in a day, guess how many are going to be at least considered and get a response of more than "No"? And when there's just 100 spray and pray the next day, I'm not going to engage with any intent to progress because there's no-one better, I'll just delete the lot and wait for someone with an actual interest in myself rather than any viable hole to get in touch 💜"

The mindset is waaaay too transactional! But the “sprayers and prayers” usually AREN’T anywhere near the forums so unfortunately most of this falls on deaf ears.

I know how the game works, I just refuse to play it anymore.

The cynic in me feels these kind of threads are simply because people want to drive traffic from others in their direction. Simple as that.

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By *ingleguy101010Man
3 weeks ago

cleobury mortimer

hiya mate..

your not alone it seems the norm on here..

for every 20 messages i send i probably get 5 ignored totally and 15 read and ignored..

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By *eroLondonMan
3 weeks ago

Mayfair


"It’s not a numbers game! I really wish people would stop saying this, because the “spray and pray” approach just adds to what’s already noisy inboxes.

Do you know what it IS about? Simply the timing of when your message is sent and whether the recipient finds you interesting. No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that, because guess what? You can’t control that.

The quicker you realise this, the less hung up and in your feelings you’ll be about it."

•

Agreed.

It's a bugbear of mine that rather hackneyed remark, together with "the bad guys ruin it for us genuine men" which is also sometimes thrown around on the forums like confetti.


"No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that..."

A well constructed profile will, to some degree, complement a half-decent message and support whether the recipient finds you interesting, if at all, but I agree otherwise.

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By *icebuttnaughty4uMan
3 weeks ago

Portsmouth

Tell me about it. And some moan about copy and paste or just saying hi but when you spend an age writing a well crafted msg only to have it unread and ignored or blocked you stop bothering after a while

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By *ustyWoman
3 weeks ago

inverclyde

Just been blocked for not sending a reply instantly....we all have a life away from the site....not everyone sits on site 24/7

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By *rinceless PrincessWoman
3 weeks ago

(not meeting)


"It’s not a numbers game! I really wish people would stop saying this, because the “spray and pray” approach just adds to what’s already noisy inboxes.

Do you know what it IS about? Simply the timing of when your message is sent and whether the recipient finds you interesting. No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that, because guess what? You can’t control that.

The quicker you realise this, the less hung up and in your feelings you’ll be about it.

•

Agreed.

It's a bugbear of mine that rather hackneyed remark, together with "the bad guys ruin it for us genuine men" which is also sometimes thrown around on the forums like confetti.

No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that...

A well constructed profile will, to some degree, complement a half-decent message and support whether the recipient finds you interesting, if at all, but I agree otherwise."

This!! Most people look at profiles before reading a message. I certainly do. If I don’t see something in the profile that makes me think we are looking for the same thing then I’m afraid the message is less likely to get a reply.

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By *its_and_TiramisuCouple
3 weeks ago

North Somerset


"It’s not a numbers game! I really wish people would stop saying this, because the “spray and pray” approach just adds to what’s already noisy inboxes.

Do you know what it IS about? Simply the timing of when your message is sent and whether the recipient finds you interesting. No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that, because guess what? You can’t control that.

The quicker you realise this, the less hung up and in your feelings you’ll be about it.

•

Agreed.

It's a bugbear of mine that rather hackneyed remark, together with "the bad guys ruin it for us genuine men" which is also sometimes thrown around on the forums like confetti.

No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that...

A well constructed profile will, to some degree, complement a half-decent message and support whether the recipient finds you interesting, if at all, but I agree otherwise.

This!! Most people look at profiles before reading a message. I certainly do. If I don’t see something in the profile that makes me think we are looking for the same thing then I’m afraid the message is less likely to get a reply. "

100000000000% this.

We couldn't care less if someone thinks they've created the greatest message in the history of all messages, personalised it to us and have read every word we've written. If they're not what we're looking for at best they'll get a nice polite 'no thanks, but great message' response, or if they've caught us on a day when the inbox has been filled with repetitive crap that we've seen a thousand times before - it'll likely go straight in the bin along with those that have put zero effort in.

Sorry not sorry.

We ALWAYS view the profile before the message.

That means that if Henry Cavill or Idris Elba were on here they could send us a FAF? or 'nice tits' message and get away with it, be guaranteed a reply and we'd forgive a total lack of effort. 🤷‍♂️

And if that sounds superficial then guess what - we don't care. We're here for us, not to service the wants of anyone else because they'reon Fab and horny. We don't need to meet anyone via a message or via Fab. We have a big enough circle of friends already and our club trips are always great. Anything that happens via a message or anything on Fab is infrequent and when we're in the mood.

The people that complain the most seem to rely on Fab as a sole source of sex or any physical intimacy with the opposite sex, and when that's not forthcoming don't do the sensible thing and look elsewhere instead of putting all their eggs in one basket, they simply blame 'the numbers', the site and the apparent 'rudeness' of other site users.

Some people wouldn't have any luck on here if they were the only person of their gender and there were a million of the opposite. Just being here and sending messages guarantees diddly squat.

Obi

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By *w funwifeWoman
3 weeks ago

near taunton


"It’s not a numbers game! I really wish people would stop saying this, because the “spray and pray” approach just adds to what’s already noisy inboxes.

Do you know what it IS about? Simply the timing of when your message is sent and whether the recipient finds you interesting. No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that, because guess what? You can’t control that.

The quicker you realise this, the less hung up and in your feelings you’ll be about it.

•

Agreed.

It's a bugbear of mine that rather hackneyed remark, together with "the bad guys ruin it for us genuine men" which is also sometimes thrown around on the forums like confetti.

No amount of profile or message tweaking is going to change that...

A well constructed profile will, to some degree, complement a half-decent message and support whether the recipient finds you interesting, if at all, but I agree otherwise.

This!! Most people look at profiles before reading a message. I certainly do. If I don’t see something in the profile that makes me think we are looking for the same thing then I’m afraid the message is less likely to get a reply.

100000000000% this.

We couldn't care less if someone thinks they've created the greatest message in the history of all messages, personalised it to us and have read every word we've written. If they're not what we're looking for at best they'll get a nice polite 'no thanks, but great message' response, or if they've caught us on a day when the inbox has been filled with repetitive crap that we've seen a thousand times before - it'll likely go straight in the bin along with those that have put zero effort in.

Sorry not sorry.

We ALWAYS view the profile before the message.

That means that if Henry Cavill or Idris Elba were on here they could send us a FAF? or 'nice tits' message and get away with it, be guaranteed a reply and we'd forgive a total lack of effort. 🤷‍♂️

And if that sounds superficial then guess what - we don't care. We're here for us, not to service the wants of anyone else because they'reon Fab and horny. We don't need to meet anyone via a message or via Fab. We have a big enough circle of friends already and our club trips are always great. Anything that happens via a message or anything on Fab is infrequent and when we're in the mood.

The people that complain the most seem to rely on Fab as a sole source of sex or any physical intimacy with the opposite sex, and when that's not forthcoming don't do the sensible thing and look elsewhere instead of putting all their eggs in one basket, they simply blame 'the numbers', the site and the apparent 'rudeness' of other site users.

Some people wouldn't have any luck on here if they were the only person of their gender and there were a million of the opposite. Just being here and sending messages guarantees diddly squat.

Obi"

100% this

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By *rightonsteveMan
3 weeks ago

Hove, mainly…

I agree with the man called Obi. I think sometimes reality is like a bucket of cold water dashing the hopes of the hopeful. Don’t blame other people for your own lack of success. I bet I could send a message to that Obi bloke and get a shag off his gf.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
3 weeks ago

Carlisle usually


"Tell me about it. And some moan about copy and paste or just saying hi but when you spend an age writing a well crafted msg only to have it unread and ignored or blocked you stop bothering after a while"

As long as that stops bothering means stop wasting time on the site rather than start sending low effort bull to people you're not all that interested in, great 💜

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By *rightonsteveMan
3 weeks ago

Hove, mainly…


"hiya mate..

your not alone it seems the norm on here..

for every 20 messages i send i probably get 5 ignored totally and 15 read and ignored.."

Did that experience suggest anything to you?

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By *etal.Man
3 weeks ago

Malice

Mate. It's easy AF to get a reply.

Punch ten points down.

If you want a reply from someone close to your attraction level, remember that there's a guy 20 points above you who's punching ten points down. Fab is not a zero-sum game.

However, if you send messages that respond to something they've said in an update or whatever, and you take the approach that you're just sending a message for the sake of it, you won't care if they reply or not.

Et voila.

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By *etal.Man
3 weeks ago

Malice

I mean shit, I send a few a week. None are about getting sex. Maybe one gets a reply. Those who don't reply are missing out. I'm charming AND funny. Like, bruh....

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By *its_and_TiramisuCouple
3 weeks ago

North Somerset


"I agree with the man called Obi. I think sometimes reality is like a bucket of cold water dashing the hopes of the hopeful. Don’t blame other people for your own lack of success. I bet I could send a message to that Obi bloke and get a shag off his gf. "

She sent you a reply Steve, you smooth talker. 😉😂

Obi

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By *rightonsteveMan
3 weeks ago

Hove, mainly…


"I agree with the man called Obi. I think sometimes reality is like a bucket of cold water dashing the hopes of the hopeful. Don’t blame other people for your own lack of success. I bet I could send a message to that Obi bloke and get a shag off his gf.

She sent you a reply Steve, you smooth talker. 😉😂

Obi"

Bloody hell!!! Yes please!

See? Dead easy, OP. Knee deep in clunge.

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By *oxycouple28Couple
3 weeks ago

bexley

Not sure if its been said before. But if you message a couple, address BOTH of them and dont make assumptions on what you think you know. Lost count of the number of crude messages about Candy we have had and assuming that you will be some sort of bull who will rock her world. Likewise im not a cuck...

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By *unYorksMan
3 weeks ago

Hebden Bridge


"To any of you guys feeling sorry for yourselves because you get blocked or ignored - there is absolutely no point directing your bitterness towards the women and couples on here.

The people who are actually causing this state of affairs are the badly behaved single men who:

1 - Don’t bother to read profiles.

2 - Spam inboxes with dozens of messages ESPECIALLY when told ‘no thanks’ because to them any sort of response counts.

3 - Opens the communication with unsolicited dick pics.

4 - Send abuse when we aren’t interested.

5 - Send ridiculously low effort messages in the first place.

So go and have a go at them. They seem to make up a massive percentage of the site.

And at the end of the day, if you feel like Fab is that bad, that we’re all so bad mannered and that there aren’t even ‘real ladies’ on here then you really don’t need to be here.

Whining about it constantly isn’t a good look.

This but don’t forget 6- sends ridiculously detailed messages about what “they are going to do to you” without even considering consent or if the person reading said message is interested in that kind of thing.

•

I would probably smack her ⬆️ derrière with my 1937 edition of The Hobbit."

..

I hope that’s the hardback with the copperplate script and the inside sleeve signed by Tolkien himself

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By *enlikesbothMan
3 weeks ago

York or visiting

Definitely doing something wrong with a cock and body like that mate!

It can often be a timing thing. Sometimes you’ll be what someone wants sometimes not. Be prepared to just chat with no expectations. If you’re just sending messages out when your ducks thinking for you you hit more roadblocks than you care for. But you’re also not entitled to a response if they think you’re rude or they looked at your profile and think not for us. Red flag or not enough information. I think it’s really important to listen to what people’s needs and wants are and meet them there. I’m going to have fun no matter what but it’s important you make the meet what they need and want first and foremost.

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By *horskin!Man
3 weeks ago

your kink

Only 10 flipping heck you are a lucky one

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By *w funwifeWoman
3 weeks ago

near taunton


"Definitely doing something wrong with a cock and body like that mate!

"

having a hot body/cock means very little when its what they are saying is wrong

ive block 100s with hot bodies because of whats come out of their mouths

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By *rinceless PrincessWoman
3 weeks ago

(not meeting)


"Definitely doing something wrong with a cock and body like that mate!

having a hot body/cock means very little when its what they are saying is wrong

ive block 100s with hot bodies because of whats come out of their mouths"

Exactly!!

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By *ackformore100Man
2 weeks ago

Tin town

What's that thing about shouting in an echo chamber?im not sure anyone is listening to anyone else. Nobody should expect nor tolerate rudeness. There's more than enough of that around.

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By *onathanjonesMan
2 weeks ago

Chester


"On average if I sent 10 messages out to people in my surrounding area the I might be very lucky to have someone read and ignore that message, let alone message me back. Is this normal? I’ve had three meets in two years which just seems pretty poor, I must be doing something wrong."

The problem is that the ratios of men to women on the site are massively skewed. I don’t know that the ratio is right now, but it used to be 40:1.

With the introduction of the likes of OnlyFans, most of the (few) sexual women around us monetised their sexualities. When that started happening, in my opinion, they started pulling away from going out to (dance) clubs, these sorts of sites and so on. Most sexual women can click their fingers and have a guy there in minutes.

The hotter the woman, the less likely they are to be on here, and for those who are, the greater the quantity of messages they’re going to be receiving. Of course, the more messages a woman receives from other men, the less your chances become.

A female friend of mine joined here a while ago. She uploaded a photo, she’s a good looking lady, and the amount of messages was completely unmanageable. What makes it worse is that because of the ratios, men get extremely desperate, and this pushes women further away and makes the problem worse.

I personally get hit rates of around half. The half that ignore, I block. The half that respond, I keep on the back burner and keep them around. Sometimes those conversations develop, and sometimes not.

Here’s a critical piece of advice; you MUST stand out. Saying stuff like “hey babe, pretty” - that’s useless. Save your energy. You’re better off tailoring the message to her profile.

What I tend to do is say something bizarre that a woman would struggle to ignore. For example; “Shoeboxes! When I buy a new pair of shoes, I always keep the box. They’re useful for storing random bits in. Anyway, what do you collect?”

There’s a bit of a formula to making these messages. Is it bizarre enough to stand out? Is it relatable? Does it take the woman on a pleasant mental journey? Does it get her thinking? Can she answer it? Etc.

It sounds weird right, but to some extent, you can force attention. It’s a bit like when you look at someone in the street. You’ll notice that they automatically look back at you. In a way, you’ve forced it without them being able to hold you accountable. It’s mostly a case of using your head to be honest.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
2 weeks ago

Carlisle usually


"Of course, the more messages a woman receives from other men, the less your chances become."

Incorrect.

If an interesting message comes from someone who has a profile that indicates compatibility and has attractive photos, the chances are I'll pay attention regardless of whether I've got 6 or 600 shit messages from profiles that don't appeal 💜

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By *aptaintwatCouple
2 weeks ago

dumfries

Probably best to think up something creative or funny. Read the bio & think of something to say that would resonate with the person you’re DM’ing?

Like me and my Mrs have just signed up as a couple, 9 out of 10 messages are generic “hi” or random picture of dick, lol. No bueno.

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By *att damonMan
2 weeks ago

Bishops Waltham

So many people just close their profiles with something akin to “If I don’t reply, I’m not interested” which is a bit of a cop out if you ask me.

But on the flip side of that, why do guys message people that aren’t looking for single guys? I’ve been getting messages from bi tv/ts and even “straight” guys asking “do you want fun?”, well I’m on here so yes I want fun, just not with “bi or straight” guys.

Read the room and know your audience.

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By *orgetmeKnotCouple
2 weeks ago

Rainham, Kent


"So many people just close their profiles with something akin to “If I don’t reply, I’m not interested” which is a bit of a cop out if you ask me.

But on the flip side of that, why do guys message people that aren’t looking for single guys? I’ve been getting messages from bi tv/ts and even “straight” guys asking “do you want fun?”, well I’m on here so yes I want fun, just not with “bi or straight” guys.

Read the room and know your audience. "

You can stop them from messaging if you use message filters.

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By *ins and secretsWoman
2 weeks ago

Glasgow and SW Scotland


"So many people just close their profiles with something akin to “If I don’t reply, I’m not interested” which is a bit of a cop out if you ask me. "

Not a cop out but let’s the people who value written rejection know that it’s not coming and they can make a decision to message based on that

Or ignore the profile and preferences as most men do

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By *eroLondonMan
2 weeks ago

Mayfair


"So many people just close their profiles with something akin to “If I don’t reply, I’m not interested” which is a bit of a cop out if you ask me."

•

If you were relatively new on here and joined 13 weeks ago I could understand your grievance. You've been here 13 years and still not cottoned on to the nuances of why people might actually write that.

It's not a cop out. Makes total sense to me.

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By *ackformore100Man
2 weeks ago

Tin town


"So many people just close their profiles with something akin to “If I don’t reply, I’m not interested” which is a bit of a cop out if you ask me.

Not a cop out but let’s the people who value written rejection know that it’s not coming and they can make a decision to message based on that

Or ignore the profile and preferences as most men do"

Most men? Or some men?

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By *harAndBryCouple
6 days ago

Downham Market


"Most men? Or some men? "

It's definitely most men (couples too, can't say for women as they don't message us). At least 90% of our messages are from people who haven't read our profile. Or they have, but ignore our preferences and message anyway.

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By *napologeticallyUS55Couple
6 days ago

Ipswich

Agree. When we allowed single men to message there seemed to be an assumption that all we think about is sex. We have an average sex drive and it just happens we like involving others sometimes when we have sex.

Incessant messaging has caused us to actually block single man so we are probably missing out on a few very nice people but as a group you let yourselves down single men.

Also inviting someone to your home or going to someone else’s home add pressure because you don’t know how you’re gonna feel after chatting for an hour.

Our advice is to go to clubs then you get a chance to get to know people and if there’s a chemistry, you’re more likely to get play.

X

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By (user no longer on site)
6 days ago

I have to agree with the couple above in regards to a lot of single men spoiling it for the rest. You need to realise how many messages we get and the majority are just two or three generic words that do not stimulate our minds. Coupled with making arrangements to meet said men who then delete their profile all adds up to a lot of scepticism on our part. Clubs are a more natural way of getting to know someone xx

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By *r SensualMan
6 days ago

London

Oh please! 🙄 Miss me with all this “a lot of men spoilt it for the rest” malarkey. No they flipping DO NOT! They only spoil it for themselves. Can we just hold individual people to account for their actions as an INDIVIDUAL for once?! 🤦🏾‍♂️

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By *napologeticallyUS55Couple
6 days ago

Ipswich


"Oh please! 🙄 Miss me with all this “a lot of men spoilt it for the rest” malarkey. No they flipping DO NOT! They only spoil it for themselves. Can we just hold individual people to account for their actions as an INDIVIDUAL for once?! 🤦🏾‍♂️

"

Totally agree the sentiment but imagine having to go through so many messages every single day…. Sorry but it has been easier to block single men.

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By *napologeticallyUS55Couple
6 days ago

Ipswich

So we meet them at clubs instead.

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By *r SensualMan
6 days ago

London


"

Totally agree the sentiment but imagine having to go through so many messages every single day…. Sorry but it has been easier to block single men. "

With all due respect, you’re preaching to converted with this response. I’m well aware of the sheer volume some users receive. I see it on my girlfriend’s solo account and with other women friends of mine. I’ve been beating on the drum of “if you don’t wanna be bombarded by men then just block them” for as long as I can remember.

Club meets for the win every single time.

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By *tandardIssueNerdMan
6 days ago

Telford


"I have to agree with the couple above in regards to a lot of single men spoiling it for the rest. You need to realise how many messages we get and the majority are just two or three generic words that do not stimulate our minds. Coupled with making arrangements to meet said men who then delete their profile all adds up to a lot of scepticism on our part. Clubs are a more natural way of getting to know someone xx"

And for those guys who don't send two or three generic words, what can we do?

I at least think I send good first messages for the most part, and my profile hasn't had any complaints really.

But that still doesn't change the fact that the vast majority of messages I send will just never get read. Let alone replied to.

I've been to clubs before, but coming to the realisation that they aren't a regular thing for me for various reasons.

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By *heFatFuckerMan
6 days ago

London

OP it’s sometimes easier to look outside your local area. People are sometimes keen to find people who they won’t know, or be a friend-of-a-friend with all the complications that can entail.

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
6 days ago

The bottom of the River Ankh


"On average if I sent 10 messages out to people in my surrounding area the I might be very lucky to have someone read and ignore that message, let alone message me back. Is this normal? I’ve had three meets in two years which just seems pretty poor, I must be doing something wrong."

If only you were nearer

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By *onathanjonesMan
6 days ago

Chester


"Oh please! 🙄 Miss me with all this “a lot of men spoilt it for the rest” malarkey. No they flipping DO NOT! They only spoil it for themselves. Can we just hold individual people to account for their actions as an INDIVIDUAL for once?! 🤦🏾‍♂️

"

Lol, I think being mixed in with a bunch of dickheads is great!

I’m a solid 3.5/10 in real life. Here though, when surrounded by a load of dickheads, I’m a 6!

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By *lanenakedMan
6 days ago

not far away


"On average if I sent 10 messages out to people in my surrounding area the I might be very lucky to have someone read and ignore that message, let alone message me back. Is this normal? I’ve had three meets in two years which just seems pretty poor, I must be doing something wrong."

You aren't doing anything wrong mate. Its just the way it is in here. Window shopping with a great many pretending to want to meet but when it comes down to it they don't. You will very definitely have a better experience of actually meeting someone if you use the dating apps. It's certainly not worth the effort you'd reportedly need to put in to write a lengthy perfect message to any given person, then another wholely unique ones to the next... Youd be here all day and get less that 5 percent response. So i rarely spend endless hours messaging and just say hello, or let them message me. Reduce your expectations.

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By *hikeMan
6 days ago

Limerick

Thank you for the tip. Simple and yet probably effective.

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By *ooty and the beast 80Couple
5 days ago

Folkestone

[Removed by poster at 29/09/26 14:46:17]

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By *ooty and the beast 80Couple
5 days ago

Folkestone

I think "should I reply no" needs its own thread.

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