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Single Men on Fab: Is This a Common Experience?

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By *ardiff_Encounters OP   Man
3 days ago

Cardiff

I have to admit, I'm finding this a very difficult scene to get into as a single man.

I'm interested to know whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether mine is unusual. I know there are plenty of people who have had much more positive experiences, which is great. People are welcome to disagree or not like what I say, but that doesn't change the fact that this has been my experience.

I've been on the site for around six months and have kept working on my profile to improve it, with the kind advice of Fab members. I've also been to several socials to prove I'm real and not just another fake profile.

For me, messaging on here has felt almost pointless. I take the time to write tailored messages based on someone's profile or most recent update rather than sending a dick pic or simply asking to fuck. Sadly, it seems to make little difference. Most messages go unread or are simply deleted.

I completely understand that couples and single women receive a huge number of messages, but it can still be frustrating from the other side. When you spend time writing a genuine message just to be ignored, after a while you start wondering why you bother.

The socials haven't really been fun for me either. Don't get me wrong, everyone I've spoken to has been friendly, so this isn't a criticism of them, not for one moment.

One problem is that the venues are usually bars with loud music. My hearing isn't great, so having a proper conversation is difficult.

It can also feel a bit like being back at school, with established groups naturally sticking together, which can make it very hard as a newcomer to join in or feel included.

I did hit it off with one person on here, but it became clear that I was more interested in them than they were in me, which is absolutely fair enough. In the end, though, I got tired of doing all the chasing. It has to work both ways.

After a while, you inevitably start to question your own value when you keep putting yourself out there but get little or nothing back. It isn't great for your confidence or your mental wellbeing. I'm not saying that's everyone's experience, but it has certainly been mine.

I'd genuinely be interested to hear whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether you've found approaches that work better. I'd also be interested in hearing from couples and single women about how it looks from your perspective, as I'm sure there are things I haven't considered.

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By *ellatioNelsonMan
3 days ago

london

Yeah, seems like the regular single male experience.

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By *anda2018Couple
3 days ago

Scunthorpe

As a couple we do get lots of messages from single men.

We generally interact more with someone who sends a thought out introduction message, maybe mentioning something from our profile, it tells us that you've taken the time to read it.

We also tend to message of you come across as respectful and polite.

Reading your profile, it comes over very much that you're a nice guy.

Maybe add a few more public pics? Hard to get an idea of someone with only 1 pic.

Keep at it, I'm sure you will find new friends. It's very single guy heavy on here, you've got your work cut out to be the one that stands out.

Mrs

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By *ardiff_Encounters OP   Man
3 days ago

Cardiff

Thanks for the advice Kanda2018. I will add some more photos as suggested.

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By *abulincsCouple
3 days ago

near a bridge

Having been let down so many times in past sometimes we get reasons for such others are extremely rare occurrence lol , many no shows and ghosting,we not posted a meet in months,seems most guys think that if we post a meet for 2-3 extra guys many say they will attend but then bottle it or think hubby just not up to satisfying me which is not the case and are disrespectful towards him ,but I live in hope one day to experience such

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By *eepitsimple400Man
3 days ago

ilkeston

I've been on here for years, can count the number of play meets on one hand, but they have been worth it when they come. The more personal I make the messages the more likely they go unread, or appear to be unread.

I'm comfortable with them being read and deleted without reply, I know not everyone is into everyone else.

Then when the messages comes up saying "think, you have already messaged this person and didn't get a reply" you have to wonder if they read the original.

And to make it more confusing I have had the odd one I've sent again months after and got chatting too.

It's mostly men on here pretending to be women or couples, just look at the forums for who starts most of the topics and how bi everyone suddenly is when its only guys talking.

Just dont take it too seriously, try not to annoy people, and block all those who aren't your type or have said not for me

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By *ambamxxxMan
3 days ago

Daventry

Yours is not a unique experience of fab, you can search and read profiles, ones you feel a connection or similarities to, you may even reach out and message them. While they suggest a unique message, and not cut / paste, it’s doubtful your receive any response.

Female and couples receive lots of messages, probably to many to open and read. So either open and ignore or delete.

I’m sure there’s another site, that is the go to now, but Iv not found it.

It can be disheartening to see a female / couple read their profile and check out there photos to then not receive anything back once you reach out.

I think clubs are a better method, but again depends on the club and day of your attendance.

Good luck though

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By *b03Man
3 days ago

Exeter


"I have to admit, I'm finding this a very difficult scene to get into as a single man.

I'm interested to know whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether mine is unusual. I know there are plenty of people who have had much more positive experiences, which is great. People are welcome to disagree or not like what I say, but that doesn't change the fact that this has been my experience.

I've been on the site for around six months and have kept working on my profile to improve it, with the kind advice of Fab members. I've also been to several socials to prove I'm real and not just another fake profile.

For me, messaging on here has felt almost pointless. I take the time to write tailored messages based on someone's profile or most recent update rather than sending a dick pic or simply asking to fuck. Sadly, it seems to make little difference. Most messages go unread or are simply deleted.

I completely understand that couples and single women receive a huge number of messages, but it can still be frustrating from the other side. When you spend time writing a genuine message just to be ignored, after a while you start wondering why you bother.

The socials haven't really been fun for me either. Don't get me wrong, everyone I've spoken to has been friendly, so this isn't a criticism of them, not for one moment.

One problem is that the venues are usually bars with loud music. My hearing isn't great, so having a proper conversation is difficult.

It can also feel a bit like being back at school, with established groups naturally sticking together, which can make it very hard as a newcomer to join in or feel included.

I did hit it off with one person on here, but it became clear that I was more interested in them than they were in me, which is absolutely fair enough. In the end, though, I got tired of doing all the chasing. It has to work both ways.

After a while, you inevitably start to question your own value when you keep putting yourself out there but get little or nothing back. It isn't great for your confidence or your mental wellbeing. I'm not saying that's everyone's experience, but it has certainly been mine.

I'd genuinely be interested to hear whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether you've found approaches that work better. I'd also be interested in hearing from couples and single women about how it looks from your perspective, as I'm sure there are things I haven't considered."

This experience is pretty universal although your mileage may vary and it's not like it's a new thing.

And yes, verifications, pictures, good profile can help, but it's rarely worth sending messages, and if you do don't expect a quick reply.

Last social I went on, they only were able to get to my message 3 weeks after I sent it, due to the sheer volume they receive. That's universal amongst fab too.

Truer more than ever that your best bet of actually meeting, or having any interest, social or otherwise is actually at clubs or events.

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By *ungle_kingMan
3 days ago

Nuneaton

I’ve been on here for around 10 years and have been to club nights, socials and arranged meets. Personally I find the majority of the time people in this lifestyle are more than welcoming and chatty and if you put your big boy pants on and make and effort to interact nobody is going to tell you to go away. From reading your post it’s like your pre thoughts about these things are going to affect any future socials etc. I won’t say getting replies on here is easy as in the past 3 years or so it’s absolutely got more difficult , timing and luck of sending a message plays a big part too.

Best of luck and just enjoy the social side as much as you can, there really are some lovely folk on here.

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By *b03Man
3 days ago

Exeter

And for the record, I've had a great time on fab and consider myself quite blessed, I'm not complaining.

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By *heTattooedDomMan
3 days ago

Winnersh

It’s a pretty standard story.

What has worked best for me is actually going to clubs and talking to people. Your mileage may vary.

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By *xposedInTheMaleMan
3 days ago

Cambridgeshire

To be honest, you can't get into the scene as a single guy, because swinging is essentially an activity for couples. The best that you can hope for is that a couple will be looking for a single guy as part of their swinging lifestyle, but you still won't be a swinger.

If you understand that, you'll understand why your experience of the site is what it is.

Or you could just be one of the singles who use the web site for one on one hookups simply because it's free.

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By *iscreetfuncpl12Couple
2 days ago

Somerset

There is an extraordinary number of men, single or otherwise, here and a very small number of women. If a single woman wants no strings sex she can get it very easily without coming here. Speaking as the male half of this couple, one who was here many years ago as a single, if I was primarily looking for NSA with single women, this is the last place I would look. I had lots of success by being honest about what I was seeking on regular dating apps and in real life. I met a number of women who contacted me whose own profiles stated they were after LTRs. When I clarified that they were after something similar to me they explained that if they even hinted in their profile that they were up for NSA they would receive literally thousands of messsges along with unsolicited dick pics. Bizarrely, female friends on regular dating sites tell me some men still think dick pics are a winning way to succeed. I used this site to meet couples, with limited success to be fair, but like you, I was one of thousands looking for a small number of couples of whom an even smaller number would be interested in me. Couples have each other and for most bringing others into the bedroom is an occasional break from reality whereas for single men, or at least it was for me, it’s something you want to do all the time which creates another mismatch of desires. From a couples perspective, we play more at clubs and mainly with couples but do play occasionally with single men. When we do, we find them because it’s when we are away somewhere and want someone to join us at short notice for our pleasure. Everyone is different but we don’t care if they are hung like a horse, gorgeous looking, what colour they are or any of the other things men seem to think is think is the attribute they lack that stops them getting meets. We just look for a profile that conveys they are nice people, respectful, single, can accommodate and that’s about it apart from being bi which is specific to our wants. There are lots of things they could say in their profile text or in their pics which could put us off, but equally those things could appeal to others.

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By *ungFunJackMan
2 days ago

Nr. Bath


"I have to admit, I'm finding this a very difficult scene to get into as a single man.

I'm interested to know whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether mine is unusual. I know there are plenty of people who have had much more positive experiences, which is great. People are welcome to disagree or not like what I say, but that doesn't change the fact that this has been my experience.

I've been on the site for around six months and have kept working on my profile to improve it, with the kind advice of Fab members. I've also been to several socials to prove I'm real and not just another fake profile.

For me, messaging on here has felt almost pointless. I take the time to write tailored messages based on someone's profile or most recent update rather than sending a dick pic or simply asking to fuck. Sadly, it seems to make little difference. Most messages go unread or are simply deleted.

I completely understand that couples and single women receive a huge number of messages, but it can still be frustrating from the other side. When you spend time writing a genuine message just to be ignored, after a while you start wondering why you bother.

The socials haven't really been fun for me either. Don't get me wrong, everyone I've spoken to has been friendly, so this isn't a criticism of them, not for one moment.

One problem is that the venues are usually bars with loud music. My hearing isn't great, so having a proper conversation is difficult.

It can also feel a bit like being back at school, with established groups naturally sticking together, which can make it very hard as a newcomer to join in or feel included.

I did hit it off with one person on here, but it became clear that I was more interested in them than they were in me, which is absolutely fair enough. In the end, though, I got tired of doing all the chasing. It has to work both ways.

After a while, you inevitably start to question your own value when you keep putting yourself out there but get little or nothing back. It isn't great for your confidence or your mental wellbeing. I'm not saying that's everyone's experience, but it has certainly been mine.

I'd genuinely be interested to hear whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether you've found approaches that work better. I'd also be interested in hearing from couples and single women about how it looks from your perspective, as I'm sure there are things I haven't considered."

The truth is this site represents real life as much as anything else. Despite being a sex-site, the female of the species is still as selective and flaky as the real world. I don't bother with single women on here as the amount of choice and attention even the average one's get seems to entitle them to be as flaky and choosy as real life dating. Maybe stick to couples or even go to a club. People tend to be in the mood at clubs and more willing to give new men a chance.

Just a thought. Best of British, you'll need it!

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By *irralguy1Man
2 days ago

wirral

It's because 99.9% of single males are on here for a quick wank while their mrs is at work so continually let single females,couples down this not only annoys them,and can unfortunately affect the confidence of women making them less likely to continue on here, it was well over 12 months before I managed to meet up with a couple on here and ironically it wasnt through the site that I met them.

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By *xposedInTheMaleMan
2 days ago

Cambridgeshire


"it was well over 12 months before I managed to meet up with a couple on here and ironically it wasnt through the site that I met them."

I don't think that that's unusual. I think that most of the couples on here use it mainly to keep in touch with people they've already met, and rarely to make new contacts.

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By *ravelbellMan
2 days ago

york

Morning all

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By *inkPomPomWoman
2 days ago

Isle of Man


"It's because 99.9% of single males are on here for a quick wank while their mrs is at work so continually let single females,couples down this not only annoys them,and can unfortunately affect the confidence of women making them less likely to continue on here, it was well over 12 months before I managed to meet up with a couple on here and ironically it wasnt through the site that I met them."

Thissss

Just makes you think not worth it

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By *eddy- SEMan
1 day ago

eltham

Yep I suspect your experience is the most common amongst single men. I’m sure when this site / community began it had pure intentions of bringing people together. But ultimately it is also a business. Much like regular dating apps, it thrives on desperate males willing to keep paying, on dumbfounded hope of meeting people.

Not everyone has the looks, physique or chat to play in this scene. The sheer numbers of single men on here makes it a buyers market. I liken it to the old lineup for football teams in school PE. The best will always get picked first.

If you keep trying, you will eventually get reply’s. If you’re nice, seem fun, eventually you will get to meet someone, but it truely is a numbers game.

Personally I’ve found it easier to meet ladies on regular dating apps, which at first, seemed absurd to me

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By *otathletic1Man
1 day ago

plymouth

I find there are some women looking for meets here! Lots of men too! X

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By *ustus4uMan
1 day ago

closer then you think

Been on here for a few years had a few social meets and thats it. It seems the norm for us single blokes im afraid as there are to many so called singles that are not single just looking to have a wank while there gf is out then disappear after a while we all get tarnished with the same brush. I keep sending polite messages mentioning things in there profile I find interesting maybe one day i will get that meet.

Just to add I have had a couple of meets lined up only for the couple to cancel then block me. On one occasion I had even spoken with the couple on the phone on the day of the arranged meet I was suddenly blocked but the kind couple did call (she) to let me know they had a change of heart.

Just keep going who knows one day we both may get a meet on this site

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By *ussexcouple40Couple
24 hours ago

Sussex

This is a swingers site. Not a sex site. Even people replying have got that wrong.

Are you a swinger or part of a swinger couple, or are you another single man looking for sex?

If you are a swinger, then this site works exactly as it should. If you are another single man looking for free sex, then good luck with that

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By *rincessandthebearCouple
23 hours ago

Alton


"This is a swingers site. Not a sex site. Even people replying have got that wrong.

Are you a swinger or part of a swinger couple, or are you another single man looking for sex?

If you are a swinger, then this site works exactly as it should. If you are another single man looking for free sex, then good luck with that"

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By *artorialMan
23 hours ago

weymouth


"I have to admit, I'm finding this a very difficult scene to get into as a single man.

I'm interested to know whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether mine is unusual. I know there are plenty of people who have had much more positive experiences, which is great. People are welcome to disagree or not like what I say, but that doesn't change the fact that this has been my experience.

I've been on the site for around six months and have kept working on my profile to improve it, with the kind advice of Fab members. I've also been to several socials to prove I'm real and not just another fake profile.

For me, messaging on here has felt almost pointless. I take the time to write tailored messages based on someone's profile or most recent update rather than sending a dick pic or simply asking to fuck. Sadly, it seems to make little difference. Most messages go unread or are simply deleted.

I completely understand that couples and single women receive a huge number of messages, but it can still be frustrating from the other side. When you spend time writing a genuine message just to be ignored, after a while you start wondering why you bother.

The socials haven't really been fun for me either. Don't get me wrong, everyone I've spoken to has been friendly, so this isn't a criticism of them, not for one moment.

One problem is that the venues are usually bars with loud music. My hearing isn't great, so having a proper conversation is difficult.

It can also feel a bit like being back at school, with established groups naturally sticking together, which can make it very hard as a newcomer to join in or feel included.

I did hit it off with one person on here, but it became clear that I was more interested in them than they were in me, which is absolutely fair enough. In the end, though, I got tired of doing all the chasing. It has to work both ways.

After a while, you inevitably start to question your own value when you keep putting yourself out there but get little or nothing back. It isn't great for your confidence or your mental wellbeing. I'm not saying that's everyone's experience, but it has certainly been mine.

I'd genuinely be interested to hear whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether you've found approaches that work better. I'd also be interested in hearing from couples and single women about how it looks from your perspective, as I'm sure there are things I haven't considered."

I've been on this site for 5yrs or so, it's only in the last couple that things have happened. Patience, reflection and adjustments plus don't just rely on fab get yourself out to clubs and socials

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By *acavityMan
22 hours ago

Redditch


"This is a swingers site. Not a sex site. Even people replying have got that wrong.

Are you a swinger or part of a swinger couple, or are you another single man looking for sex?

If you are a swinger, then this site works exactly as it should. If you are another single man looking for free sex, then good luck with that"

Single men and single women can be swingers.

If you’re looking for recreational sex with more than one person.

There are also a lot of shaggers on here, single people looking to hookup with single people. (Nothing wrong with that)

And there are an awful lot of spectators on here. People who set up accounts, to perv on those who are actually meeting. These are the ones who set up meetings, for the thrill of the chase, but never show. These profiles are too good to be true, because they are made up.

What can you do? Be honest, be genuine and be prepared for a long wait.

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By *essTTWoman
22 hours ago

Birmingham


"I have to admit, I'm finding this a very difficult scene to get into as a single man.

I'm interested to know whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether mine is unusual. I know there are plenty of people who have had much more positive experiences, which is great. People are welcome to disagree or not like what I say, but that doesn't change the fact that this has been my experience.

I've been on the site for around six months and have kept working on my profile to improve it, with the kind advice of Fab members. I've also been to several socials to prove I'm real and not just another fake profile.

For me, messaging on here has felt almost pointless. I take the time to write tailored messages based on someone's profile or most recent update rather than sending a dick pic or simply asking to fuck. Sadly, it seems to make little difference. Most messages go unread or are simply deleted.

I completely understand that couples and single women receive a huge number of messages, but it can still be frustrating from the other side. When you spend time writing a genuine message just to be ignored, after a while you start wondering why you bother.

The socials haven't really been fun for me either. Don't get me wrong, everyone I've spoken to has been friendly, so this isn't a criticism of them, not for one moment.

One problem is that the venues are usually bars with loud music. My hearing isn't great, so having a proper conversation is difficult.

It can also feel a bit like being back at school, with established groups naturally sticking together, which can make it very hard as a newcomer to join in or feel included.

I did hit it off with one person on here, but it became clear that I was more interested in them than they were in me, which is absolutely fair enough. In the end, though, I got tired of doing all the chasing. It has to work both ways.

After a while, you inevitably start to question your own value when you keep putting yourself out there but get little or nothing back. It isn't great for your confidence or your mental wellbeing. I'm not saying that's everyone's experience, but it has certainly been mine.

I'd genuinely be interested to hear whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether you've found approaches that work better. I'd also be interested in hearing from couples and single women about how it looks from your perspective, as I'm sure there are things I haven't considered.

The truth is this site represents real life as much as anything else. Despite being a sex-site, the female of the species is still as selective and flaky as the real world. I don't bother with single women on here as the amount of choice and attention even the average one's get seems to entitle them to be as flaky and choosy as real life dating. Maybe stick to couples or even go to a club. People tend to be in the mood at clubs and more willing to give new men a chance.

Just a thought. Best of British, you'll need it!"

" I don't bother with single women on here as the amount of choice and attention even the average one's get seems to entitle them to be as flaky and choosy as real life dating."

Are you saying because uts a 'sex site' women shouldn't be selective and should just shag anyone that messages them?"

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By *poolGuyMan
21 hours ago

Liverpool

Yes, it's very common and unfortunately I've come across hostility too.

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By *ackagain2025321Man
14 hours ago

stockton

Yeah it happens almost every time

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By *orseCoolMan
13 hours ago

Doncaster

I am really enjoying this discussion. It is a great opportunity for us to connect and develop a better understanding. Thanks for keeping the dialogue alive; hopefully, we will all be on the same page soon.

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By *essTTWoman
13 hours ago

Birmingham


" I am really enjoying this discussion. It is a great opportunity for us to connect and develop a better understanding. Thanks for keeping the dialogue alive; hopefully, we will all be on the same page soon."

What page is that ?

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By *ungFunJackMan
13 hours ago

Nr. Bath


"I have to admit, I'm finding this a very difficult scene to get into as a single man.

I'm interested to know whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether mine is unusual. I know there are plenty of people who have had much more positive experiences, which is great. People are welcome to disagree or not like what I say, but that doesn't change the fact that this has been my experience.

I've been on the site for around six months and have kept working on my profile to improve it, with the kind advice of Fab members. I've also been to several socials to prove I'm real and not just another fake profile.

For me, messaging on here has felt almost pointless. I take the time to write tailored messages based on someone's profile or most recent update rather than sending a dick pic or simply asking to fuck. Sadly, it seems to make little difference. Most messages go unread or are simply deleted.

I completely understand that couples and single women receive a huge number of messages, but it can still be frustrating from the other side. When you spend time writing a genuine message just to be ignored, after a while you start wondering why you bother.

The socials haven't really been fun for me either. Don't get me wrong, everyone I've spoken to has been friendly, so this isn't a criticism of them, not for one moment.

One problem is that the venues are usually bars with loud music. My hearing isn't great, so having a proper conversation is difficult.

It can also feel a bit like being back at school, with established groups naturally sticking together, which can make it very hard as a newcomer to join in or feel included.

I did hit it off with one person on here, but it became clear that I was more interested in them than they were in me, which is absolutely fair enough. In the end, though, I got tired of doing all the chasing. It has to work both ways.

After a while, you inevitably start to question your own value when you keep putting yourself out there but get little or nothing back. It isn't great for your confidence or your mental wellbeing. I'm not saying that's everyone's experience, but it has certainly been mine.

I'd genuinely be interested to hear whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether you've found approaches that work better. I'd also be interested in hearing from couples and single women about how it looks from your perspective, as I'm sure there are things I haven't considered.

The truth is this site represents real life as much as anything else. Despite being a sex-site, the female of the species is still as selective and flaky as the real world. I don't bother with single women on here as the amount of choice and attention even the average one's get seems to entitle them to be as flaky and choosy as real life dating. Maybe stick to couples or even go to a club. People tend to be in the mood at clubs and more willing to give new men a chance.

Just a thought. Best of British, you'll need it!

" I don't bother with single women on here as the amount of choice and attention even the average one's get seems to entitle them to be as flaky and choosy as real life dating."

Are you saying because uts a 'sex site' women shouldn't be selective and should just shag anyone that messages them?""

No. I'm saying that women are more naturally selective than men and when they have so much choice, single men on here find it nearly impossible to be selected, ffs.

That sort of defensive, daft reaction is exactly why I don't meet single women like you!

Peace.

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By *essTTWoman
13 hours ago

Birmingham


"I have to admit, I'm finding this a very difficult scene to get into as a single man.

I'm interested to know whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether mine is unusual. I know there are plenty of people who have had much more positive experiences, which is great. People are welcome to disagree or not like what I say, but that doesn't change the fact that this has been my experience.

I've been on the site for around six months and have kept working on my profile to improve it, with the kind advice of Fab members. I've also been to several socials to prove I'm real and not just another fake profile.

For me, messaging on here has felt almost pointless. I take the time to write tailored messages based on someone's profile or most recent update rather than sending a dick pic or simply asking to fuck. Sadly, it seems to make little difference. Most messages go unread or are simply deleted.

I completely understand that couples and single women receive a huge number of messages, but it can still be frustrating from the other side. When you spend time writing a genuine message just to be ignored, after a while you start wondering why you bother.

The socials haven't really been fun for me either. Don't get me wrong, everyone I've spoken to has been friendly, so this isn't a criticism of them, not for one moment.

One problem is that the venues are usually bars with loud music. My hearing isn't great, so having a proper conversation is difficult.

It can also feel a bit like being back at school, with established groups naturally sticking together, which can make it very hard as a newcomer to join in or feel included.

I did hit it off with one person on here, but it became clear that I was more interested in them than they were in me, which is absolutely fair enough. In the end, though, I got tired of doing all the chasing. It has to work both ways.

After a while, you inevitably start to question your own value when you keep putting yourself out there but get little or nothing back. It isn't great for your confidence or your mental wellbeing. I'm not saying that's everyone's experience, but it has certainly been mine.

I'd genuinely be interested to hear whether other single men have had similar experiences, or whether you've found approaches that work better. I'd also be interested in hearing from couples and single women about how it looks from your perspective, as I'm sure there are things I haven't considered.

The truth is this site represents real life as much as anything else. Despite being a sex-site, the female of the species is still as selective and flaky as the real world. I don't bother with single women on here as the amount of choice and attention even the average one's get seems to entitle them to be as flaky and choosy as real life dating. Maybe stick to couples or even go to a club. People tend to be in the mood at clubs and more willing to give new men a chance.

Just a thought. Best of British, you'll need it!

" I don't bother with single women on here as the amount of choice and attention even the average one's get seems to entitle them to be as flaky and choosy as real life dating."

Are you saying because uts a 'sex site' women shouldn't be selective and should just shag anyone that messages them?"

No. I'm saying that women are more naturally selective than men and when they have so much choice, single men on here find it nearly impossible to be selected, ffs.

That sort of defensive, daft reaction is exactly why I don't meet single women like you!

Peace."

I think it's safe to say that the feeling is extremely mutual.

Have a good day

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By *aandLoCouple
13 hours ago

Southampton

I wouldn't want to speak for others experience but as a couple who get regular, if not masses of messages from men, we read them all.

If a message shows they've read our profile and have made a little effort in their message, if they're not for us we will politely decline.

Sadly, too many guys do seem to think it's a quick way to get a fuck just by making contact with our profile.

We're not being fussy, entitled or think we're a 8/10 when in 'real life' we're barely a 5. We just expect equal effort from anyone who contacts us (singles and couples) to that which we have put into our profile and photos.

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By *en_Dover79Man
13 hours ago

Oswaldtwistle

I don't message strangers, I just go to clubs and meet people there and build a connection. It has served me well over the years.

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By *hamspairCouple
12 hours ago

Gloucester

Hi,

We sympathise, but the reality of the matter is, that the vast majority of couples have their settings set to no contact from single males. That isn’t limited to the site though. It happens at clubs as well. The problem is, that any female, regardless of being single or in a couple, immediately gets leapt on. Via the internet, or in a club. It is overwhelming.

We will happily invite single blokes to engage with us, but on our terms. That being said, we only meet people at clubs. Even couples have to do something extra to get our attention on the website.

When you meet somebody in person, you get so much more information. How they smell, how they move, and you feel their energy, or lack of it. You catch the twinkle in their eye.

I guess what I am saying is, “it isn’t you”. It is the fact that single blokes vastly outnumber every other demographic, and are keen to promote their own interests. Nothing wrong with that, but you have to realise that you are throwing yourself into a vast pool.

The fact that you make the effort to read people’s profile and write a personal message raises you above the majority already.

We don’t accept any messages from single blokes, and that is mostly because the messages sent have taken no effort whatsoever. “How’s you doin?”, “fancy a fuck?”, “nice tits”, are prefect examples. That gets you nowhere.

Maybe a club visit might suiit you? Even then it is an uphill battle. Think of it as applying for jobs. You might get an answer for every 100 applications.

Hope this helps.

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By *um n raisinWoman
8 hours ago

taunton


"This is a swingers site. Not a sex site. Even people replying have got that wrong.

Are you a swinger or part of a swinger couple, or are you another single man looking for sex?

If you are a swinger, then this site works exactly as it should. If you are another single man looking for free sex, then good luck with that"

spot on 100 zillion% this ..

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By *um n raisinWoman
8 hours ago

taunton

100 to 200 men or more per woman/couple simple maths tell you most will not get any meets or very little.. simple maths that most guys like to ignore.. simple simple maths

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By *unner6969Man
8 hours ago

Kent


"Yeah, seems like the regular single male experience."

Yes, spot on.

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By *iseekingbiCouple
7 hours ago

N ireland and West Midlands


"This is a swingers site. Not a sex site. Even people replying have got that wrong.

Are you a swinger or part of a swinger couple, or are you another single man looking for sex?

If you are a swinger, then this site works exactly as it should. If you are another single man looking for free sex, then good luck with that"

Well said.

Another thread from a single man who hasn't worked out that it isn't a sex site.

Single men need to work very, very hard to have any chance of success. That's just the way it is.

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By *xposedInTheMaleMan
10 minutes ago

Cambridgeshire


"Single men and single women can be swingers. "

Sorry, but you're deluding yourself on that one. To be very blunt, the relationship of singles to swinging couples is a bit like groupies to rock bands. It doesn't matter how many people you shag, you're never going to be one of the band.

Many single people are lovely, and it's a lot of fun to have them around, but they aren't swingers, because in the modern world it's not enough to enjoy recreational sex with multiple partners to be a swinger - you have to have a partner who does the same, and you're happy about it.

That doesn't make singles inferior in any way, but it explains the dynamics on this site.

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