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Face pic exchange stalemate

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

We have reached a couple of stalemates with single guys recently where they won't show their face pic until we show ours. We understand couples have no more rights than single guys to discretion. However we have come across lots of single guys who seem to be pic collectors (much more than couples) and our view (right or wrong) is that society judges a couple with kids on a sex site more harshly than a single guy.

For that reason we always ask for the guys face photo first then return the favour. We've recently talked to some guys who won't do this (we've got good verification so hopefully they can see we're genuine).

Are we being harsh or are we right to be careful ?

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By *cottishrichMan
over a year ago

Here and there

A little from column A, a little from column B.

You have to judge every situation on its merits. If you believe the guy to be genuine, ie he has good veri's and the rest of his pics are good then maybe you should show a little trust and send yours first.

I have sent face pics many times only for the message to be deleted and receive no reply, which I think is pretty crappy really. I can understand why these guys don't want to send theirs first and I can understand your reluctance too but ultimately someone needs to take the plunge.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its fine folks having their own preferred ways of doing things on here, but personally I won't send out a face pic without seeing theirs first - my verifications should firmly establish that I'm no timewaster or pic collector.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell them if they wanta meet to show pics.

We had a message of a couple yesterday saying love our pics but have we got face pics.said yes

They replied and asked to see them,then they show theirs

Told them no as they messaged us they show us or move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have no qualms about sending first. And if I'm sending the initial message I'll add a couple to solve any problems. But it's your profile, your rules, so stick with your own way of doing things, and you can't go wrong

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Personally, I always work on the basis that whoever makes first contact shows first.

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By *r nobodyMan
over a year ago

salford


"Tell them if they wanta meet to show pics.

We had a message of a couple yesterday saying love our pics but have we got face pics.said yes

They replied and asked to see them,then they show theirs

Told them no as they messaged us they show us or move on."

I agree with you

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By *cottishrichMan
over a year ago

Here and there


"Personally, I always work on the basis that whoever makes first contact shows first.

"

Good way to do it.

Or Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

We rarely make first contact with guys so it doesn't appear that we're too out of step with opinion in expecting pics first. A lot of guys do send pics without any issues (and without us asking - lol) so when you come across ones who don't it can raise suspicions.

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Who ever makes first contact should provide theirs first, just my opinion of course x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Ah 'The Big Bang Theory' approach with a slightly different meaning to the 'Bang'


"Personally, I always work on the basis that whoever makes first contact shows first.

Good way to do it.

Or Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Who ever makes first contact should provide theirs first, just my opinion of course x"

I agree. Making first contact means THEY really want the meet. Therefore, THEY should show first. Whether it's single guy, girl, couple doesn't matter. It's whoever most wants the meet who should show first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Who ever makes first contact should provide theirs first, just my opinion of course x

I agree. Making first contact means THEY really want the meet. Therefore, THEY should show first. Whether it's single guy, girl, couple doesn't matter. It's whoever most wants the meet who should show first."

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By *un_JuiceCouple
over a year ago

Nr Chester


"Personally, I always work on the basis that whoever makes first contact shows first.

"

This, surely the etiquette you,d think all would accept and understand.

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By *ikkiBWoman
over a year ago

Falkirk

I only show mine to those im either friendly with or who I intend on meeting. I get many random messages askin for pics but I just ignore them mostly. Even had someone offer to pay me for a pic

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Pet hate of mine, peeps with no pics wanting to see my private pics.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"We have reached a couple of stalemates with single guys recently where they won't show their face pic until we show ours. We understand couples have no more rights than single guys to discretion. However we have come across lots of single guys who seem to be pic collectors (much more than couples) and our view (right or wrong) is that society judges a couple with kids on a sex site more harshly than a single guy.

For that reason we always ask for the guys face photo first then return the favour. We've recently talked to some guys who won't do this (we've got good verification so hopefully they can see we're genuine).

Are we being harsh or are we right to be careful ? "

We all set our own individual preferences and meet criteria. If others don't respect that, that in itself is a filter!

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By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

They are some people that won't send pics first, as they are scared that the person receiving them may know them.

Or, they might just be collectors

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree that the side that contacts initially should be happy to send the first face pic,never had a situation of im not sending mine until you send yours,if it did I know id end the contact at that point,im not into all that faffing around

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

UPDATE

Guy was too successful to exchange pics and suspiciously, despite having no tattoos, would not show us body pics either. Our suspicions we're probably correct. We've met some really successful people on here and other sites and even they showed body pics! We've moved on.

God this is difficult lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally, I always work on the basis that whoever makes first contact shows first.

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have reached a couple of stalemates with single guys recently where they won't show their face pic until we show ours. We understand couples have no more rights than single guys to discretion. However we have come across lots of single guys who seem to be pic collectors (much more than couples) and our view (right or wrong) is that society judges a couple with kids on a sex site more harshly than a single guy.

For that reason we always ask for the guys face photo first then return the favour. We've recently talked to some guys who won't do this (we've got good verification so hopefully they can see we're genuine).

Are we being harsh or are we right to be careful ? "

There's a simple rule that I use. I'm a single guy, and if I find a couple or a single girl who I'm interested in, I always send a message with a face pic attached. Also, if I get a message from a single girl or a couple, which interests me ... I reply with a message and a face pic attached. To be honest, I don't really understand why a guy would not want to send his face pic to you. Equally, why would you not want to send your face pics to him? Modesty, on a swinging site which exists for nsa sex meets, seems to be somewhat misplaced

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"We have reached a couple of stalemates with single guys recently where they won't show their face pic until we show ours. We understand couples have no more rights than single guys to discretion. However we have come across lots of single guys who seem to be pic collectors (much more than couples) and our view (right or wrong) is that society judges a couple with kids on a sex site more harshly than a single guy.

For that reason we always ask for the guys face photo first then return the favour. We've recently talked to some guys who won't do this (we've got good verification so hopefully they can see we're genuine).

Are we being harsh or are we right to be careful ?

There's a simple rule that I use. I'm a single guy, and if I find a couple or a single girl who I'm interested in, I always send a message with a face pic attached. Also, if I get a message from a single girl or a couple, which interests me ... I reply with a message and a face pic attached. To be honest, I don't really understand why a guy would not want to send his face pic to you. Equally, why would you not want to send your face pics to him? Modesty, on a swinging site which exists for nsa sex meets, seems to be somewhat misplaced "

We had someone from work chat with us then send face pic. Almost fell off our seats. Had to make our excuses. We've got good jobs and kids so like most couples we want to hide this part of our life. That's why we're careful with face pics.

If I (male of couple) was a single guy I wouldn't be as worried. Single guy looking for NSA sex wouldn't make the local papers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

We had someone from work chat with us then send face pic. Almost fell off our seats. Had to make our excuses. We've got good jobs and kids so like most couples we want to hide this part of our life. That's why we're careful with face pics.

If I (male of couple) was a single guy I wouldn't be as worried. Single guy looking for NSA sex wouldn't make the local papers "

You're right, and thanks for the kind response. I keep forgetting, as a single guy, that couples have to be careful with jobs/kids etc.. Its a shame though, because the guy from work that you mentioned was interested. Hope you let him down gently

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Personally, I always work on the basis that whoever makes first contact shows first.

"

This

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By *owboy BebopMan
over a year ago

Glasgow


"UPDATE

Guy was too successful to exchange pics and suspiciously, despite having no tattoos, would not show us body pics either. Our suspicions we're probably correct. We've met some really successful people on here and other sites and even they showed body pics! We've moved on.

God this is difficult lol "

As others have said...sounds fishy, if he wants to meet he should forward photo first, would steer well clear.... Plenty of other guys would love a meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have reached a couple of stalemates with single guys recently where they won't show their face pic until we show ours. We understand couples have no more rights than single guys to discretion. However we have come across lots of single guys who seem to be pic collectors (much more than couples) and our view (right or wrong) is that society judges a couple with kids on a sex site more harshly than a single guy.

For that reason we always ask for the guys face photo first then return the favour. We've recently talked to some guys who won't do this (we've got good verification so hopefully they can see we're genuine).

Are we being harsh or are we right to be careful ?

There's a simple rule that I use. I'm a single guy, and if I find a couple or a single girl who I'm interested in, I always send a message with a face pic attached. Also, if I get a message from a single girl or a couple, which interests me ... I reply with a message and a face pic attached. To be honest, I don't really understand why a guy would not want to send his face pic to you. Equally, why would you not want to send your face pics to him? Modesty, on a swinging site which exists for nsa sex meets, seems to be somewhat misplaced

We had someone from work chat with us then send face pic. Almost fell off our seats. Had to make our excuses. We've got good jobs and kids so like most couples we want to hide this part of our life. That's why we're careful with face pics.

If I (male of couple) was a single guy I wouldn't be as worried. Single guy looking for NSA sex wouldn't make the local papers "

Depends on what said single guy did for a living!

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By *ucy and CarlCouple
over a year ago

Broadstairs

If you sent the initial message to them you should show pics first. If it was them that sent first then they should. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally, I always work on the basis that whoever makes first contact shows first. "

This

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By *ukkakecoupleukCouple
over a year ago

horsham


"We have reached a couple of stalemates with single guys recently where they won't show their face pic until we show ours. We understand couples have no more rights than single guys to discretion. However we have come across lots of single guys who seem to be pic collectors (much more than couples) and our view (right or wrong) is that society judges a couple with kids on a sex site more harshly than a single guy.

For that reason we always ask for the guys face photo first then return the favour. We've recently talked to some guys who won't do this (we've got good verification so hopefully they can see we're genuine).

Are we being harsh or are we right to be careful ? "
i think if you are looking for single guys it should be you who puts your face pics on first,however if its them looking it is there turn. but who called who and why would either contact someone who did not have a face pic on in the first place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To be honest, I don't really understand why a guy would not want to send his face pic to you. "
because then they have you body/cock pic and your face pic and csn put the two together. That's fine if there is trust but at the initial stages its a risk. Several folk on here i sent both two i never heard from. They could do anything with those pics. And whilst it might not make the local papers, i'd probably lose my job if they went public

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"Personally, I always work on the basis that whoever makes first contact shows first.

"

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I always enjoy the messages I get from people asking for a face pic. It's on my profile!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You don’t look at the mantelpiece when poking the fire

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I work on the basis that whoever sends the first message is responsible for the face picture first except the guy that has said that when we meet, he will THEN send me a face picture

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally I work on the basis that whoever sends the first message is responsible for the face picture first except the guy that has said that when we meet, he will THEN send me a face picture "

what? after the meet? haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never send mine first. Ever.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I always enjoy the messages I get from people asking for a face pic. It's on my profile! "

and the ones that don't read the bit in my profile that asks for a face pic with first message as they can see mine

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"We have reached a couple of stalemates with single guys recently where they won't show their face pic until we show ours. We understand couples have no more rights than single guys to discretion. However we have come across lots of single guys who seem to be pic collectors (much more than couples) and our view (right or wrong) is that society judges a couple with kids on a sex site more harshly than a single guy.

For that reason we always ask for the guys face photo first then return the favour. We've recently talked to some guys who won't do this (we've got good verification so hopefully they can see we're genuine).

Are we being harsh or are we right to be careful ? "

Webcams are good if you find yourself in this situation, that way it's 1, 2, 3 show!

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"A little from column A, a little from column B.

You have to judge every situation on its merits. If you believe the guy to be genuine, ie he has good veri's and the rest of his pics are good then maybe you should show a little trust and send yours first.

I have sent face pics many times only for the message to be deleted and receive no reply, which I think is pretty crappy really. I can understand why these guys don't want to send theirs first and I can understand your reluctance too but ultimately someone needs to take the plunge. "

Been here myself mate, stinks doesn't it? Common courtesy costs nothing, I was taught.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally I work on the basis that whoever sends the first message is responsible for the face picture first except the guy that has said that when we meet, he will THEN send me a face picture

what? after the meet? haha "

Yep and I am still trying to understand why, and make him understand that I am not making arrangements to meet without seeing it, still waiting

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By *UNCHBOXMan
over a year ago

folkestone

Face pics in my experience are overrated anyway. How do you know how recent they were taken? I much prefer doing a cam to cam with both of the couple there on cam. It gives a much better idea of what they look like and what i look like now, rather than say 2 years ago.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"UPDATE

Guy was too successful to exchange pics and suspiciously, despite having no tattoos, would not show us body pics either. Our suspicions we're probably correct. We've met some really successful people on here and other sites and even they showed body pics! We've moved on.

God this is difficult lol "

I really don't get people who use excuses like this. At the end of the day we are all (supposedly) here for the same reasons. To meet new friends and have some fun in the process. If someone is genuine they will have no problem sharing pics, if not there is obviously something dodgy. If your job of any kind prevents you sharing pics as details then your in the wrong place and need to move along. It isn't illegal so there's nothing to hide.

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By *kblokenorthMan
over a year ago

Any


"A little from column A, a little from column B.

You have to judge every situation on its merits. If you believe the guy to be genuine, ie he has good veri's and the rest of his pics are good then maybe you should show a little trust and send yours first.

I have sent face pics many times only for the message to be deleted and receive no reply, which I think is pretty crappy really. I can understand why these guys don't want to send theirs first and I can understand your reluctance too but ultimately someone needs to take the plunge. "

+1

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have reached a couple of stalemates with single guys recently where they won't show their face pic until we show ours. We understand couples have no more rights than single guys to discretion. However we have come across lots of single guys who seem to be pic collectors (much more than couples) and our view (right or wrong) is that society judges a couple with kids on a sex site more harshly than a single guy.

For that reason we always ask for the guys face photo first then return the favour. We've recently talked to some guys who won't do this (we've got good verification so hopefully they can see we're genuine).

Are we being harsh or are we right to be careful ? "

I just think we all have rights to be discreet. I find most people will show their photo to me first if not ..... next

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Face pics in my experience are overrated anyway. How do you know how recent they were taken? I much prefer doing a cam to cam with both of the couple there on cam. It gives a much better idea of what they look like and what i look like now, rather than say 2 years ago.

"

True and I find most people look different in the flesh anyway but I don't like cam either

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By *it of fun cplCouple
over a year ago

village between York and Hull

If you approach them then yes you should show, if they approach you then no .. it is up to them to show first.. That is how we do it anyway..

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By *lleyCat1969Man
over a year ago

Folkestone


"I have no qualms about sending first. And if I'm sending the initial message I'll add a couple to solve any problems. But it's your profile, your rules, so stick with your own way of doing things, and you can't go wrong "

This.

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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago

Retirement Village


"We have reached a couple of stalemates with single guys recently where they won't show their face pic until we show ours. We understand couples have no more rights than single guys to discretion. However we have come across lots of single guys who seem to be pic collectors (much more than couples) and our view (right or wrong) is that society judges a couple with kids on a sex site more harshly than a single guy.

For that reason we always ask for the guys face photo first then return the favour. We've recently talked to some guys who won't do this (we've got good verification so hopefully they can see we're genuine).

Are we being harsh or are we right to be careful ? "

I'm trying to avoid forums but this one interests me having been in similar stalemates

If i may propose a scenario to you (one i have encountered and think is wrong) if a member approaches you and sends a pic would you send one back even if it was a 'no thank you' ?

I only ask as personally (& this is just my opinion) if i send/receive a pic then i will always respond with one in return. Whether there is mutual attraction and that attraction remains in person is another question i think it's rude, impolite and untrustworthy to ask for one and not send one back.

I don't think you're being harsh and have every right to privacy just as single guys or girls. If they do not wish to send one then that's their loss, the above was just my wayward thoughts on the topic

*crawling back under my rock before i get spotted for writing too much *

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been a single guy, still have a single profile too. Men have to give up first. Job done!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Who ever makes first contact should provide theirs first, just my opinion of course x"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Being a couple we get approached from guys more than we approach them. We always tell guys who approach us that we need to find out about them first and they shouldn't send us face pics until we feel we may want to meet. We are then honest and say that if they send us a pic and we like then we will return a pic. If we don't fancy them then we won't return a pic (but they have been warned).

We don't see the point in sending pics to guys who we arent going to meet (remember they knew the rules before exchanging pics). Like most things in swinging the female holds all the power and if she doesn't like the guys pic then she chooses not to show hers. May seem cruel but just practical and up front.

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

By the same token, i've contacted, and met couples who have sent their face pics to me first, with no issues.

As someone mentioned, weigh each case up based on its merits. I don't always send my pics first, especially in situations where i'm not 100% sure of the person/ people i'm in contact with.

If you reach a stalemate, touch cookie. Find someone else that will happily bend to your will (as it appears)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"By the same token, i've contacted, and met couples who have sent their face pics to me first, with no issues.

As someone mentioned, weigh each case up based on its merits. I don't always send my pics first, especially in situations where i'm not 100% sure of the person/ people i'm in contact with.

If you reach a stalemate, touch cookie. Find someone else that will happily bend to your will (as it appears)"

There is no will to bend to. We make the way we interact pretty clear to anyone who wants to exchange pics. We state what we want to do and they can do likewise. If we both match then great. If we don't feel comfortable on either side then so be it. They don't bend to our will as they have their own mind and we respect that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Who ever makes first contact should provide theirs first, just my opinion of course x

I agree. Making first contact means THEY really want the meet. Therefore, THEY should show first. Whether it's single guy, girl, couple doesn't matter. It's whoever most wants the meet who should show first."

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge


"We have reached a couple of stalemates with single guys recently where they won't show their face pic until we show ours. We understand couples have no more rights than single guys to discretion. However we have come across lots of single guys who seem to be pic collectors (much more than couples) and our view (right or wrong) is that society judges a couple with kids on a sex site more harshly than a single guy.

For that reason we always ask for the guys face photo first then return the favour. We've recently talked to some guys who won't do this (we've got good verification so hopefully they can see we're genuine).

Are we being harsh or are we right to be careful ? "

My rule is simple. I send a first message then I add a face pic. They send a first message, I expect the same in return.

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